Funny / Tales of the Ketty Jay

Retribution Falls

• While at Quail's home, his whores end up being very interested in the handsome Frey, though he finds himself too busy to entertain them. He suggests that they could always tend to Pinn in the meantime. They take one look at Pinn, and inform Frey that they'll wait.
• Frey makes a dramatic, rousing speech about clearing his name and then gallantly asks his crew who will stand with him. They just stare at him in response, clearly surprised at Frey's sudden change in attitude.
  Frey: *snaps* Oh, piss on you all! If you’re not on the Ketty Jay in half an hour I’ll leave you here to freeze. *storms out*
• Amalicia's reaction when she sees Frey again after two years? Is to kick the crap out of him, because he never came back for her. Made even funnier when Frey blatantly lies about not having got the letter she had sent to him, and then sleeps with her. Again.
• Crake and Jez attending the Winter Ball together.
  Crake: Small steps. Don’t stride. Remember you’re a lady.
  Jez: I thought we agreed that I was a craftbuilder’s daughter.
  Crake: You’re supposed to be a craftbuilder’s daughter trying to be a lady.
  Jez: I am a craftbuilder’s daughter trying to be a lady!
  Crake: That’s why the disguise is flawless.
• When they try to make Frey sign a confession stating that he killed the Archduke's son he instead stabs his torturer in the hand with the pen, screws up the confession, and tries to eat it.
• Poor Samandra Bree has to pick up a piece of paper that Frey has been keeping in his crotch, and she's absolutely disgusted by it.
  • It's also funny as the Century Knights are left staring at Frey as he seemingly gropes at himself in front of them, when really he's pulling out said document.

The Black Lung Captain

• The book opens with the Ketty Jay crew stealing from an orphanage, of all places.
  Malvery: Told you robbing an orphanage was a bad idea.
  Frey: No, it was Crake who said that. That’s why he wouldn’t come. You thought it was a good idea. In fact, your exact words were: “Orphans don’t fight back.”
  Malvery: Well, they don’t. It’s the rest of the village you’ve got to watch out for.
  *after being relentlessly chased by the rest of the village*
  Malvery: Anyway, I’ve reconsidered my position. I’ve come to believe that stealing from a bunch of defenceless orphans could be seen as a bit of a low point in our careers.
  • While escaping, Frey, Malvery and Pinn end up jumping (or in Pinn's case, being pushed) off a waterfall. The villagers continue to follow them relentlessly, one of them crying out 'It's for the orphaaaaaans' as he falls. Frey's response is to yell back that he IS an orphan. While he's not wrong, and was raised in an orphanage, he's now around thirty years old.
  Crake: *on seeing the sorry state of Frey, Malvery and Pinn* Robbing the children didn’t go to plan, then?
  • During the escape, Harkins finally get his own back on Pinn.
  Frey: And you’re scared of water.
  Harkins: He’s scared of water?
  Pinn: *snaps* Don’t you start, you jittery old git! You’re scared of everything.
  Harkins: *triumphantly* Not water, though.
  • The chase ends with Frey sulkily giving the money back, declaring that 'the only thing worse than robbing a bunch of defenceless orphans, is failing to rob a bunch of defenceless orphans'.
• During the climactic battle, Harkins finds Slag the cat in his cockpit. The cat claws the shit out of him and he’s so preoccupied with it that his craft goes into freefall. He only manages to save them by punching the cat in the face, knocking it senseless, so he can focus on his flying. When he barely pulls up safely, he informs a bewildered Pinn asking if he’s ok, “I just punched out the cat.”

The Iron Jackal

• After Ashua joins as the second formally educated member of the crew, she and Crake repeatedly mock Frey by using big words and telling him the wrong definitions.
  • A guilty Crake finally explains all the words right before their final stand against the Iron Jackal.

The Ace of Skulls

• The crew hear odd sounds coming from the ship's vents and think they might be haunted. Until Ashua points out it's "two cats going at it." After expressing puzzlement over where Slag got a girlfriend, they all start cheering him on.

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