Funny / Reaction & Review

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• Seeing him wearing 3D glasses in his reviews of The Drawn Together Movie: The Movie! and The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
• Sometimes, his laughing can be rather contagious, most specifically in his reviews of Devil and Birdemic.
• In his Human Centipede 2 review, he says that the first The Human Centipede film was "as shocking as a YouTube video of a kitten playing with a ball of yarn".
• His Turkish Star Wars review gave us some funny lines:
  • Him pointing out how often the earth exploded several times.
  • "Remember kids, if you dip your hands into molten gold, you will get magical golden gloves."
• While reviewing Birdemic, Emer suddenly deploys this gem.
  "I'M HUNGRY. I'M HURT. I'M-OHHH MAN, I WANT A FUCKIN' HAPPY MEAL." FUCK you you're not getting a goddamn HAPPY Meal you little FAGGOT you are on the beach SHUT THE FUCK UP.
• Many of the things that happen in the January 31, 2016 live stream. Gems include them reading disturbing fan fiction, Emer taking joy in Winnie the Pooh murdering Christopher Robin, Bernie Sanders giving out doughnuts at his rallies, live-action tentacle porn, Emer discussing deontology, and a discussion about waifus. Plus, the fact that Duck's internet connection kept failing.
  • "God damn it, Duck, your computer has AIDS."
  • The justification for having a live stream on Sunday was the fact that they had nothing better to do.
  • Robin Birdperson
  • Slimer Hitler
• The time he dropped the "n-word".
• The Quiplash streams result in many of these:
  • "What is a horrible name for a cruise ship?" "Titanic, The Revenge."
• His review of Fist of the Vampire has him say this:
  The character is totally still and the background is doing this little happy-ass number.
• Before reviewing Total Recall (2012), he recites a blurb on the back of the Blu-Ray case, which states "Better than the original"... written by a random user on MySpace.
• During his review of Ultraviolet (2006), he starts explaining the practical non-story of the film, in that it features a character who is a vampire - or rather, "hemophage". He uses this term just three times...and then Emer just gives up and spitefully goes right back to calling her a vampire.
  • "Because, you know, why honestly have a well-fucking-defined nose or cheekbones when you still have eyes that the viewer can fuckin' see?"
  • "'Violet, we have a cure!' ...Good! Fuckin' use it!"
• In his review of Live Freaky! Die Freaky!, Emer states this in complete honesty: "I wanna see a good Charles Manson musical."
• invoked While addressing the Big Bad's MacGuffin disc in Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2, Emer completely blows the already brainless Idiot Plot into pieces with one simple idea:
  Emer: Did it ever dawn on any of these spastic faggots to just snap the disc in two?! [...] I'm sorry, guys, that might've actually made a little bit of sense! But no, no, of course not! (busts up laughing)
  • Stating that the film would only be entertaining to germs and parameciums.
• "Does it even matter anymore?"
  • "Spoiler alert: the film doesn't get any better."
• During his review of The Flintstones and WWE: Stone Age Smackdown!, Emer criticizes the animation for being awfully Off-Model, to the point where he states there are shots which make The Undertaker three feet tall.
• In Emer's especially negative reviews, he has a tendency to spoil the films as unceremoniously as possible, even stating "spoiler alert" after laying out the information, even having a good but acknowledging snicker over it.
  • "I'm going to spoil the entire film for you...in three words. [...] Drugs. Are. Bad."
• Just after finishing Black Devil Doll From Hell, Emer lets loose his frustration the second he shuts it off.
  Emer: (over the sound of "metal" which more or less amounts to white noise) God, what the fuck did I just watch? Well, guys, that was Black Devil Doll From Hell- (shuts the film off) God, SHUT. THE FUCK. UP! Jesus Christ, that soundtrack was annoying!
  • From that same video, just after Emer complains about another piece of the soundtrack, he encounters quite a perplexing scene.
  Emer: Oh, my God...I hate this. (loud, bizarre violin music slowly gets drowned out by a looped warble, as Emer's expression quickly changes into stone-faced confusion) What the fuck?! (film starts moving in freeze frames with what can only be described as droning noise in the background) O-kay, now, instead of showing us moving film, now we're getting, like, still shots. Yay, a horror movie done in a slideshow, that's... (gives a thumbs up) totally...awesome! (immediately turns hand over to give a thumbs down) No, it isn't.
• Any and all times he compares certain characters or actors to inanimate objects, saying such things like his pen having more personality or life than one or more actors/characters. It gets doubly funny on the rare occasion of Emer citing that such comparisons would be an Insult to Rocks, instead stating that said objects have more life/personality instead.
• His final reaction as he shuts off Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter:
  Emer: Ohh, look at that. We have bloopers in the post-credits, ooh, WACKINESS! FFFFFFFFUCK YOU and FUCK this movie! Okay... (five second Beat ) WELL, that was Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter...
• While raging over how much he loathed Father's Day, Emer insinuates that he could create a better script by just digging out shit from a septic tank and tossing it at paper.

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