Funny / Fate/Grand Order

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Main Page | Arc 1 | Arc 1.5 | Arc 2 | Events

Despite having to save the world, some laughs here and there won't impede the effort, right?

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• Arc 1
• Arc 1.5
• Arc 2
• Events

In General

• Some interactions of Servants' NP and Craft Essences have the potential to be game-breaking and funny. Arash, for example. Equip him with the Necromancer CE that grants a chance to resurrect in case of death, use his NP that deals tremendous damage for the price of self-sacrifice, then the CE effects kick in. Use your Command Spell to recharge Arash's NP gauge, use his NP, and the CE effects kick in. Rinse and repeat. Long story short, you can literally nuke enemies with Arash, potentially 4 times in a battle.
• The usual flavor text for the skill Mental Pollution is that the madness of the Servant will hinder mind interfering spells, at the cost of the Servant turning into a raving lunatic who can't be understood beside those with the same level of madness. The closest we see the second effect in prior canon is between Gilles and his Master in Fate/Zero, but here we can see those stat sheets come to work.
  Gilles: Jeannejeannejeannejeanne...!
  Phantom of the Opera: Christinechristinechristinechristine...!
• Bond Craft Essences:
  • All of the Max Bond Craft Essences are accompanied by a short story about the Servant they are for. Most are melancholy, heartwarming, heroic, or dramatic. And then you get to Shakespeare's CE, "Really Convenient", which just has an enthusiastic rant about how typewriters are the best thing ever... and then the keys get stuck.
  • Mysterious Heroine X's Bond CE is literally her hit list. Not only does she still aim to eliminate Saber-faces like Altria and Nero, her fanatical hatred of Sabers has led to her targeting non-Saber-faces like Ryougi and Siegfried. In the description, it's revealed she's been wandering around the halls of Chaldea, muttering about elimination of Sabers, and listening to recordings of her Madness Mantra to kill all Sabers while sleeping. What makes this even more hilarious is Shiki's file is stamped with Failure, instead of Top Secret.
  • Fergus's Bond CE description has him explain what the potion in his Craft Essence artwork is and why he wants to make sure a minor doesn't drink it. It's a potion that gives incredible vitality to those who pass the luck check and to those who don't... bad things happen. Turns out you drank it.
  • Medea Lily's Bond CE description has a short story where she reads an ordinary cookbook and is naive enough to believe its claims that candy will make people not angry or sad, and the reason people are fighting is because there just isn't enough sweet food for everyone. So she decides to create an infinite supply of pancakes... with a Demon Pillar as the main ingredient.
  • Astolfo's CE description starts out with an explanation of what a Hippogriff is... before it diverges into Astolfo having fun with an exasperated Hippogriff. It's basically a tsukkomi and boke routine between them.
  • Swimsuit Kiyohime's Bond CE artwork is writing in the sand. It reads:
    "I love you I love you I love you I love you love love ahh ahh Master Master Master Master ahhhhhh..."
  • Gawain's CE profile is a narrative from the perspective of Gringolet, Gawain's horse. And turns out, his horse is also a trashtalker. He even calls Gawain a gorilla. Not only that, it's possible that the horse doesn't even remember Gawain's name.
  • Swimsuit Saber Alter's bond CE is her mop as the Sword of Selection, Caliburn.
  • After many depressing Bond Craft Essences from Servants from the first Lostbelt, Ivan's Bond CE, Ivan the Terrible's Library, ends with him asking the hundred Ruble question:
    "What? It's gone? But we collected so much. Honestly, what are those scholars doing!?"
  • Half of Red Hare's CE description is devoted to him obsessing over carrots and how delicious they are.
  • Summer Illya's Bond CE is about her hiding under a blanket terrified after finding out that one of her magical girl anime discs is replaced by a gore horror one.
• Fate/Grand Order Material contains some good laughs:
  • It turns out, of all the Knights of the Round Table, Altria can't deal with Tristan the most because she doesn't know whether he's sleeping or awake. The Halloween 2016 event showed that neither can Lancelot or Cleopatra.
  • Medea's skill "Golden Fleece" can heal her in-game. The reason? Because it's so fluffy! Demonstrated in this fancomic◊, and also described in the in-game skill description (making it one of the only skills with Flavor Text unrelated to its effect).
  • Jeanne is actually overjoyed by Jeanne Alter's existence and considers her a brash little sister.
  • Martha wants to punch Mephistopheles because he looks like a demon.
  • Heroine X's wish for the Grail is the destruction of all other Sabers. Or at least get them to change their class name to Attacker or Swordsman or something like that. Also she undoes the locks on your Saber cards when you're not looking.
  • The explanation of Fionn's "Fin-tan Finnygas" Noble Phantasm. It's oil from the salmon of knowledge. He has salmon fat on his thumb and he becomes really smart when he licks it. Despite salmon fat including a lot of DHA which is said to improve concentration, it doesn't really evoke a dignified image, does it?
  • Angra Mainyu is jealous of Dantes because he flies around, has a cool coat and shoots black fire, while he has to walk around half-naked. He also says he knew that Medusa had the potential to be an Avenger "since 2005, to be precise" but she's scarier than he thought she'd be.
  • There's unused concept art for Angra Mainyu's third Ascensions. One of them is just him wearing a cardboard box.
  • The description for Nero Bride's skills claims she could use all her buffs simultaneously on herself to turn into a Super Bridejin.
  • Concept art for Edison's rainbow chest beam has poor Arash be the test dummy for it.
  • Irisviel's comments:
    to Illya: sighted > smile > hug (0.5 seconds)
    to Ko-Gil or Alex: "How cute! ...Wait, what did you say your names were, again?"
  • Da Vinci apparently has a penchant for strolling around naked after she's taken a bath, because she's not entirely aware of herself as a young woman.
  • Although Caster Gil insists that he has no right to talk to Enkidu, he doesn't really stick to that statement, because Enkidu pesters him instead.
    "You're always telling me to take a rest. I guess a little rest is fine... wait wait! You cannot find polar bears in the south pole!"
  • Chacha's lines towards people she finds quirky seem fine. But she always seems more interested in expressing how much she hates the Tokugawa (especially Ieyasu) and wants everything about Tokugawa to go burn or die.
  • Sigurd muses that the Valkyries could be considered his sisters-in-law and he wonders who he could ask for advice on interacting with sisters. The immediate next relationship is for Jeanne's summer version, as he laments he shouldn't have asked her for advice.
  • Altria Caster in her material book profile says that she has nothing in particular to talk about Oberon... then accuses him of constantly ordering honeydew melons in the cafeteria despite not being sure if he actually likes it just to piss off everyone because of how rare and expensive the melons are despite their size.
  • Watanabe no Tsuna has no recollection of what happened in Naraka Mandala Heian-kyo, but assumes that Medea Lily and Jason are in a happy relationship together. Jason very much would like it on the record that they are not.
• One of Illya's Art attack animations is to just throw Ruby at the enemy, which then proceeds to whack the enemy with itself.
• Chloe refuses to strip for her Master when you ascend her and keeps reprimanding you for expecting her to wear less with each stage (During her final ascension, she does it anyway, apparently having given in.)
• Santa/Samba Quetzalcoatl, on the other hand, explains that she doesn't strip off (as another welfare servant with limited art) because there's nothing left to strip off.
• Meanwhile, Summer Jeanne Alter's lack of ascension art is explained by her attachment to her swimsuit.
  "I don't care what anyone says, I'm not gonna change out of it."
• Jaguarman renamed all her skills. Blessing of the Jaguar becomes Jaguar Punch, a destructive power. Monstrous Strength becomes Jaguar Kick, another destructive power. Jaw of the Dark Jungle becomes Jaguar Eye, but this is a beam power. Then there's Ishtar's comment on her:
  "JAGUAMURA-sensei!"
• Romulus's default pose is ridiculous. It definitely gives him the Large Ham kinda feel. He looks like he's T posing for dominance.
• Chacha's animations. She falls down because she laughs too hard or when trying to activate a skill.
• BB's animations. Her Buster attack is "Sakura Beam!" and she's pouring a "Holy Cup" for her extra attack! And then there's her Noble Phantasm. It has to be seen to be believed. Even better, if you look closely, inside the giant syringe are ascension materials.
• Bathory's new NP sometimes has her screaming "HOEEE~~?", like she's not ready to use her NP yet.
• Mash's master mission lines are pretty great. Her "Cha-ching! [...]" line when you claim Saint Quartz Fragments seems to imply that she plays with said fragments like they're toys. Also, in the end, she insists she totally didn't play with important resources. The New Year 2018 patch adds a Moe moment with her where she hums the tune of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and freaks out after realizing that you are looking at her.
• Tamamo Cat's Noble Phantasm, Napping in the Dazzling Sunshine and Feasting. First, she summons a Mega Neko to attack her enemies. Then, as the damage animation finishes, the camera pans further left, showing her happily taking a nap. She then gets Stun status and health regeneration for the next two turns. In her update attack and NP animations, she actually stays napping after the NP if she has the Stun effect.
• Sherlock Holmes' attack animations when used on... certain types of enemies will lead to a goldmine of out-of-context situations that would get him arrested multiple times over.
• Osakabehime's idle animation is her dozing off, trying not to fall asleep on her feet.
  • Her summoning line is her introducing herself cheerfully before asking if she can just go home already.
  • In a Freeze-Frame Bonus during her 2nd Arts attack, it's revealed that the game she is playing on her tablet is Fate/Grand Order; from the looks of the title screen, she has yet to clear Solomon.
• Caster of Okeanos' Noble Phantasm can turn certain enemies it hits into pigs for a Stun effect. What throws this into hilarity is the fact how several other Servants' NPs look when done on the pigs in question. From Serenity kissing the pig on the forehead to Archer Inferno throwing and spearing the pig, to Jeanne Alter skewering the pigs and roasting them in her bonfire, not to mention.. hmm... Medb's infamous NP.
• Marugoshi Shinji-Kun. It's a mockery of Shinji for one with a muppet-like thing on the table, but the description goes further beyond. It's a dishwasher, and it drinks "brutish red stew" and "is a terrible adventurer". It also doesn't have a safety device. Also, it insists that it totally isn't based off a specific person. It's like BB and Drake conspired to have this program made just to spite Shinji.
• One of Illya's interactions once she's grown comfortable with her master has her saying she likes head pats... then admitting she'd also like to have her master dry her hair after bathing, only to have an Oh, Crap! "Did I Just Say That Out Loud?" reaction. It's then immediately decided to be bathing-time, with Illya stating she has not yet prepared her heart for things like that.
• A deer can sometimes pop out of nowhere during Ereshkigal's skill animation, causing her to freak out and desperately try to shoo it away.
  • During Ereshkigal's Phantasm, onlookers sometimes appear on the ledge. Since the Phantasm is a recreation of her casting Tiamat into Kur in the Babylon chapter, King Hassan's presence is understandable. Summer Nitocris in the Medjed costume? Not so much.
• While Gilgamesh's scolding for not telling him of your birthday is funny enough, getting him alone can give you the biggest one, particularly if you were not expecting him to drop from that particular banner:
  Gilgamesh: Fufuhahahahaha! Being able to summon me means that you've used up all of your luck, mongrel.
• Gilgamesh's lvl 3 bond line may be interpreted as him - of all people - being jealous that you are contracting with other servants, so you better bring people as good as him along:
  Gilgamesh: You seem to have contracted with many other Heroic Spirits. Perhaps it cannot be helped for someone as mediocre as yourself, but… I don’t like it. At least, make sure you assemble individuals of the highest caliber if they are to stand by me.
• Certain Servants' NPs that involve tossing the enemy around or anything that moves the target like Xuanzang and Archer Inferno look absurd and hilarious at the same time when used against huge enemies like dragons and Demon Pillars. Quetzalcoatl's NP takes the cake as she piledrives things regardless of size, akin to "Sabin suplexed a train". It is also just strange for Assassin of Nightless Castle to casually dip a Cosmos Tree in her pot of poison. And speaking of suplex, using Astraea's NP on the tank enemy in SIN Lostbelt would be surreal.
• The delivery on Okita's signature victory phrase just reeks of funny in a bit of Black Humor, seeing her happy Adorkable moment that she can still fight getting yanked with her Incurable Cough of Death. Just have a listen.
  Okita-san's big victory^note Daishouri! Yep, my body's all fine! I can still fight on—*COUGH!?*
• Altria Alter's Bond Lines chronicled how the intimidating dark knight lady eventually became a closet hamburger junkie.
  Bond Level 3: Need more excitement. I'm hungry. Make something. Master. I'll eat anything. Huh? A hamburger?
  Bond Level 4: Master... This lowly Servant is shamefully asking... When are we gonna see some pancakes? You know, the king of junk food.
  Bond Level 5: Munch, munch... Munch, munch... Huh? How long have you been there? Want more? A dozen more? Fine. I'll forgive your rudeness. Sit over there. I might finally see you as my Master...
• In his first ascension, Zhuge Liang/Lord El-Melloi II/Waver adjusts his glasses when he uses his skills even though he's not wearing them. He just gestures like he's pushing up a phantom pair of glasses. Pretty much anyone who's worn glasses has been there...
• Chiron's NP, while not comical per se, takes a clear page from Caliburn's book as it seems to hit crotches as well. Hitting weak spots indeed.
• In general, Martha's tendency to flip into a rowdy punk-ish girl before correcting herself into a purdy saintly woman.
  (Begin battle): What? You want a piece of me? *ahem* No... that's too impulsive.
  (Victory): You're 10 Years Too Early! *ahem* No... The path is always rocky...
  (Level Up): Yes, yes!! *ahem* No. Thank you very much.
  (3rd Ascension): Well, this isn't so bad! *ahem* No. Thank you very much.
  (Bond Level 3): (sigh) So tired~! The way you used me, it's kind of rough, y'know... A—whuh!? Ah... um... *ahem* Tee hee, is there something wrong?
  (Disliked things): Huuuh?? The things I hate?? Ah, no... I wonder what it is, Master? The things I hate... there's no way I could possibly hate anything... (awkward Noblewoman's Laugh)
• Sakamoto Ryouma has an extra NP sprite, which is that of Oryou making peace signs over his shoulder and saying, "Yay, peace peace," in her deadpan voice. Ryouma also admonishes her not to eat the enemy—only to be dismayed when she does it anyway.
• Abigail's profanity-laden attempt at being modern in the 3rd anniversary album. Poor girl's left completely mortified.
  • Why does Holmes have a deerstalker? Because Mash badgered him into it as fanservice.
  • Arjuna's found a monkey he thinks is capable of the Monkey Fist style of martial arts, and wants to bring it back to Chaldea.
  • Salieri keeps up Avenger tradition by acting like an edgelord, proceeding to fanboy over gelato, then remembering he's supposed to be an edgelord.
• The description of Jeanne Alter's Noble Phantasm:
  The cursed flag held by Jeanne, who descends as the dragon witch.
  In the name of the Avenger, she converts her and the surrounding area's hatred into magical energy, igniting her enemy's injustice, corruption, and hypocrisy to burn them to the marrow of their bones.
  This is scary.
• Usually, Shuten Caster finishes her Noble Phantasm with a Wave-Motion Gun fired from her gourd. But on random occasions, Ibaraki appears sitting on the gourd which then gets launched like a rocket and explodes on impact with poor Ibaraki still on it.
• Jason's Noble Phantasm has him summon Atalante, Heracles and Medea (Lily) onto the battle. As Medea (Lily) and Heracles march on, Atalante kicks Jason into the enemy zone and fires her Noble Phantasm. Trapped in the enemy zone, Jason starts running desperately to dodge Atalante's arrows. Then, he avoids Medea (Lily)'s attack before Heracles smashes the enemies, incidentally launching Jason. Before being sent away into the sky, Jason can only beg Heracles not to hit him, but it is futile. Seeing this pompous asshole reduced to frantically running around like a headless chicken is simply glorious.
• One of Merlin's updated animations from the 2019 summer event has Fou kick Merlin on the head as he uses one of his skills and then stand on it.
• LET'S! DRAWN ROARING SWORD! OH YES! SEXY!! MY NAME IS MUSASHI MIYAMOTO!!
• Summer Okita's animations are pretty hilarious.
  • One of her attack animations involves her jetpack malfunctioning leading to her bouncing around the screen with her yelping in pain all the way until she falls to the ground, damaging the enemy along the way.
  • And one of her Noble Phantasm animations has her dash so hard in the sky she makes A Twinkle in the Sky, and suddenly there's this drawing of her face in the sky as if she died, but...
    Okita: No, no. Actually I didn't die or anything...
• Orion has revealed himself as a badass worthy of the title of Grand Archer! One of his Noble Phantasm animations, however, has him shed his badass persona and revert a bit to his teddy bear self. Not his perverted self, but more like having a multitude of "Oh, Crap!" expressions in voice and face that Artemis is going to choke and smother him and give him the buff.... it hurts like hell!
  "Um, I have a bad feeling about this! Crap, Artemis is mad! I think she found out! Cancel Noble Phantasm! CANCEL!"
  (cue Neck Snap)
• Odysseus' Noble Phantasm is fittingly the Trojan Horse, it turns into silly when the Trojan Horse is a mecha that transforms into a human form with a Chest Blaster. Cue Kamen Rider, Super Sentai and Gundam jokes.
• Nemo's Noble Phantasm has a full cutscene of the Nemos preparing to launch the Nautilus for attack, but Nemo Bakery's amusingly out of place with cheerfully announcing the omelets are ready to be eaten.
• One of Koyanskaya of the Light's Noble Phantasm lines in her Third Ascension doesn't sound too funny in terms of just the text, but Chiwa Saito's incredible delivery makes it gut-bustingly hilarious.
  Koyanskaya: "Janjajaaaan! Look at this throb! This ENGINE that shakes the heavens! This intense mobility that shakes the earth! I was totally self-indulgent on this one. Anyways, welcome to my domain."
• The description of Habetrot's Noble Phantasm opens with this line:
  Habetrot’s original Noble Phantasm is “Spin Wheel that Gifts the Bride” (Bridal Spin Wheel), which makes any bride an outstanding dress, but because of various reasons, it’s now “A big ol’ cannon that shoots a big ol’ bullet”.
• After years of wondering how exactly the Master uses embers to power up Servants, we finally get the answer from Altria Caster. Turns out that the Servants basically eat them like candy and according to Altria, they have no flavor to them. She then asks if the Master could add flavor to them next time.
• Most Strengthening Quests come with two boss Servants who have some kind of thematic link to the Servant getting buffed. Often it's something simple like Animal Motifs or a common job, but sometimes you get sillier things (like Okita, who ends up fighting the Chaldea medical team in the form of Asclepius and Nightingale). And then there's Jeanne Alter's buff quest, where the bosses are Meltryllis and Charlotte. People very quickly realized that the only link between those three is that they're some of the most aggressive competitors for the title of main love interest, making the entire thing a very literal shipping war.
• When using Taikoubou's Noble Phantasm, there's a chance where he loses his grip on Dashenbian and accidentally drops it into the lake. His flustered expression sells it, though the whip hits its targets anyway.
• One of Koyanskaya of Darkness's skills buffs characters with animalistic traits. This isn't just Wild Beast Servants that gain an advantage from Nega-Weapon, but also includes any character with a Playboy Bunny costume, seemingly out of nothing but her appreciation for Hugh Hefner.
• Super Bunyan's Noble Phantasm has her grow large from all the social media likes she's gathered before punching the enemy. But in her Third Ascension? She punches the enemy really, really quickly as a nod to her original version's NP. Still waiting on that NP skip option, eh, Riyo?
• When using Barghest's second ascension, her attack line during a Brave Chain sometimes make her sound like she is violently rejecting the enemy's advances ("I don't want!" "To go out!" "With you!")
• If the battlefield is wide enough, Kotomine's first ascension Extra Attack features him sliding around in the back launching rockets at the enemy with an Evil Laugh.
• In Larva/Tiamat's 3rd Ascension, one of her NP lines has her activate "Hyper Mother" mode and remind her child(ren) not to forget to bring their lunchbox(es). Regardless of whether she's small or a large dragon, she's still a mother after all.
• Altria Caster's Summer outfit in her first Ascension is sporty and cool and the one in her 3rd is regal and elegant. Her 2nd Ascension? It's a ridiculously cute Alice's Adventures in Wonderland-esque frilly dress, complete with bunny ears ala Lancer Altria's own Summer wear back in Las Vegas. The poor girl is heavily embarrassed to be in such a girly outfit, she cusses out Oberon (heavily implying that he was responsible for the outfit).
• Speaking of Oberon and Summer, his "Robin Goodfellow" form has swapped the winter prince espionage outfit for... a striped swimsuit similar to those worn in classic cartoons, pink arm floaties and a super cute duck floaty ring that even has lace and Blush Stickers. It's as ridiculous as it is adorable, and must be seen to be believed.
• Jacques de Molay's Noble Phantasm with its lines of Knights Templar might be ominous... if not for the knights all wearing spectacles over their helmets.
• Despite the noted similiarities between Yamato Takeru and Altria, Mysterious Heroine X declares in the former's profile that she'll give them a pass and not count them as a Saberface even if the Idiot Hair was a close call. This is the sole reason Yamato Takeru does not actually have the Saberface trait in gameplay.
• Andromeda's myth is one of the original Chained to a Rock stories... except none of the people who recorded the myth bothered to give either the chains or the rock any details such as size, shape, or general location. In what is one of the most blatant abuses of Servant mechanics to date, Andromeda's answer to these questions is "All of Them", making up the crux of her skillset such as having an endless number of rocks as flails and projectiles, using her chains to swing or even fly through the air, and even summoning the sea monster that tried to eat her as a Power Up Mount because it was Taken for Granite in her myth. What makes it especially funny is that you'd expect this level of silliness to come from gag characters like Nobunaga or Mysterious Heroine X, but no, Andromeda is a completely legit Servant within the Nasuverse's rules.

"My Room" Interactions

• Quite a few of the Servant birthday quotes have the potential to be funny.
  • Mata Hari: Happy birthday! Can you drink alcohol?
  • Andersen: Happy birthday~ Can you buy me a pint?
  • Speaking of Andersen, in his updated voice lines he straight up laughs mockingly at the idea of Kiara becoming a magical girl. More than one person has declared it makes him sound like another famous role by Takehito Koyasu.
  • Robin Hood: Happy birthday. I don't have a present, but please bear with this smile.
  • Altera: *visibly uncomfortable* Master... Is today... your birthd... ... Forget it.
  • Heracles tries to give you a smile and is obviously struggling with it, but still is doing his best for the player.
  • At higher bond levels Gilgamesh chastises you because you don't tell him 7 days in advance. Just what the hell did he want to plan?
  • Bunyan makes you a cake... but eats it before she has a chance to give it to you.
  • Tamamo is surprised that you have a birthday, presumably for reasons.
  • Oberon passive-aggressively debates what to get you. Oberon Vortigern on the other hand sarcastically asks if you really want him to wish you a happy birthday.
• Some Servants' interactions in My Room are quite funny.
  • Angra Mainyu has some funny lines that lean on the fourth wall, with him complaining about the player actually using him in battle and telling them to roll a better Servant, or telling them to hurry up, go outside, and spend some stamina.
    Angra Mainyu: "Aah… I’m beat… How many times have I died already… isn’t it hard for you too? Hurry up, pull a better Servant and make your life easier already."
    Angra Mainyu: "Bo-ring. Oi, will you just go outside already please. Use your stamina, c’mon."
  • Jeanne Alter is shocked at how her senpai (the original Avenger), Angra Mainyu, is ridiculously weak.
  • Iskander is taken aback by Lancer Altria (Alter), especially her gigantic boobs, and blames it on his drinking.
  • Kid Gil doesn't want to start a ruckus with his adult self so he goes to hide.
  • Medea Lily is unnerved by her adult form's malevolent stare and adult Medea compliments her Lily counterpart as if she's another person.
  • Robin Hood wants to hunt Tamamo for her fluffy tail. That, or he still has a grudge after what happened in CCC (In short, he became target practice for a Groin Attack technique Tamamo came up with in that game).
  • Nero and Bathory want to start an idol competition. Nero also still considers Tamamo a rival (both being playable characters from EXTRA). It's Hilarious in Hindsight now that she and Tamamo are the faction leaders for Fate/Extella.
  • FSN!Cu is annoyed with EMIYA because an Archer like him fights on the frontline. Likewise, EMIYA asks you not to put him in a party with "that blue Lancer" and "that golden Archer". The latter joke's funny factor increases threefold with Ishtar (another golden Archer, using Rin as her host body), Parvati (another blue Lancer, possessing Sakura's body), and Altria (who can also be summoned as a Lancer with a blue coat). Naturally, fans go along with it.
  • Void Shiki comments on Shiki's grumpiness like a big sister complaining about her little sister. Ryougi's reaction to Void Shiki is disbelief at seeing another her and blames it on hallucinations brought on by overworking.
  • Dantes is uncharacteristically happy seeing a writer Servant (being a literary character), ordering coffee for them.
  • Beowulf mentions to Siegfried or Martha that despite dragons tasting good, he doesn't like them very much.
  • Ozymandias tells Tamamo to call him "older brother" because they're both avatars of the sun. He thinks Karna, Gawain and Quetz are pharaohs because they also have such a powerful connection with the sun.
  • Illya says when she met Blackbeard in Chaldea's hallway, he fainted while babbling unintelligible words (maybe he's shocked at seeing a true loli magical girl).
  • Chloe panics at seeing a "mama-like" person (Dress of Heaven) strutting around with an exposed chest.
  • Elisabeth freaks out on sight of shirtless Caster Gilgamesh, which reminds her of a certain scene in Fate/Extra CCC.
  • King Hassan's remarks for the other Hassans are to ask them if their choices meant anything... before flatly asking for their heads. This is especially funny because of his Kirei voice.
  • Arthur is confused by Altria and Merlin in this world because of their voice and genders. Regarding Mordred, he remarks that this world's Mordred is cute before reminiscing about the Mordred of his world. Imagine our Mordred's reaction.
  • Musashi's new line for Raikou is her wondering about Raikou's swordsmanship as the strongest mystery killer... before being mesmerized by the size of her breasts.
    "What... an... amazing size."
  • Okita meets Chacha and then...
    "So you were Nobu's niece. Oh, your face does look the—Eh? "So you're the always-feeble Saber-With-Shit-Stats"? Who the heck told you such things?! Eh? Nobu did? Then I'll kill her!"
  • Santa Altria Alter threatening to make dragon steak out of Halloween Elisabeth Bathory.
  • Enkidu's first reaction to seeing Ishtar is to look for something to throw at her.
  • Achilles has been somewhat happy to have his rival Hektor as an ally, only to take back his words after Hektor threw rocks at him. And it hurts him. Considering his Nigh-Invulnerability makes it so he can only be hurt by divine contructs or Servants with Divinity (which both Hektor and the rocks are not), Fridge Logic ensues.
  • Hektor suggests to Penthesilea that they go throw rocks at Achilles together.
  • What Bedivere likes:
    My favorite food is steamed vegetables...
    I-I mean I have dedicated my entire being to my king!
  • Sakamoto Ryouma takes pleasure in having Okita on the same side. Oryo-san, however...
    Oryo-san: This one looks weak.
    Ryouma: Hey, stop it!
  • Speaking of Okita, she tries to become a bossy Saber senpai for Okita Alter, only to find out that Alter is not a Saber, can shoot beams, and doesn't suffer from Weak Constitution, which causes Okita to whine in envy.
  • Swimsuit Jeanne Alter tries to order Swimsuit Altria Alter around in the most humiliating way possible. The latter isn't impressed and opts to Excaliblast the former's hotel room instead.
  • Swimsuit Medb brags about getting a summer version to Scathach and pities her for not getting hers - Scathach, who was one of the first batch of summer Servants. Scathach understandably just walks away while Medb is still bragging.
  • Summer Ushiwakamaru barks like a dog when she tries to communicate with Lobo, though she gets annoyed when the wolf stayed silent.
  • Qin Shi Huang names mercury as what he likes the most, considering it a beautiful symbol of immortality fitting of an emperor. What he hates, though? Also mercury. Because he tried drinking some once and turns out it tastes like crap and is bad for your health.
  • Before his True Name is revealed, the Archer of Shinjuku/James Moriarty only replies with the word deerstalkers when being asked about what he hates the most. However, after his True Name's revealed, he directly points out he hates Sherlock Holmes, and as for the reason...
    Moriarty: Things that I dislike? Sherlock, of course. Damn you, Holmes! Why am I stuck with a middle-aged body whilst you get to be a handsome young man!? Absolutely unforgivable!
  • Napoleon is delighted that Moriarty's Red Baron nickname is "The Napoleon of Crime." While laughing it up, he asks Moriarty what he thinks of the real thing.
  • Fujino imagines a movie-esque Cool Versus Awesome fight between her and Mecha-Elisabeth. Why? Because Mecha-Elisabeth looks like a bridge.
  • David is dumb enough to first call Circe "Abishag" after insulting her figure, then eat the food she offers him.
  • Rama is happy to meet a legendary hero like Arjuna, but disturbed that he and his brothers are all married to the same woman.
  • Arjuna is genuinely puzzled over Aśvatthāman's constant state of anger and wonders if it's because of calcium deficiency. Which turns into Dark Comedy once you consider how Aśvatthāman was too poor to buy milk when he was a child. Arjuna may be right!
  • Aśvatthāman's Jinako impression. Especially since the subject of the conversation - that Jinako REALLY wants to avoid - is Aśvatthāman being a Yankee.
  • Helena Blavatsky gushes over Rama/Karna/Arjuna, saying that India is her spiritual home.
  • Gawain is pleased to see his fellow Knights of the Round Table...
    Gawain: Except for you, Bors. Take a seat over there.
  • When Paris meets Achilles, he apologizes to the latter for shooting his heel. Achilles however feels awkward looking at Paris' face and simply looks away. Paris gets angry and demands to be taken seriously.
  • Similar to the above, Sanson cannot look directly at Charlotte Corday when they meet again as Servants. It is awkward for him to meet the other woman he beheaded besides Marie, after all.
  • Kama's child form scolds you because she's Older Than They Look and you're treating her like a child. In the middle of her scolding, she stops and tells you that doesn't mean you should take the cake away.
  • Kijyo Koyo starts in her dinosaur form, so you get about 4 minutes of her growling and roaring until she finally takes human form and is able to speak.
  • Altria Caster wants to share cheesecake with Medb.
  • Tam Lin Gawain believes Ibuki-Douji is the Saber of Sabers... due to looking better in vertical striped sweaters "then the seedy King of Knights" for obvious reasons. Incidentally a holy sword is thrown at her.
  • Tam Lin Lancelot admires the original Saber Lancelot for all of his knight qualities until she sees him and the original Tristan hitting on married women and outright worries that Morgan thinks of her that way.
    • After reaching her Stage 3 form, Tam Lin Lancelot's lines sometimes make it sound like she thinks she's an actual jet fighter, like wanting to take Moriarty's Noble Phantasm as secondary armaments, liking Berserker Lancelot more then his Saber counterpart purely on the fact he has a Vulcan Cannon, and considers Odysseus' Trojan Horse to be her rival. An additional line she gets after clearing Lostbelt 6 has her recognizing the Storm Border as a good mothership worthy to carry her.
  • Percival's lines range from trying to feed Altria and a fleeing Gareth, to Fist Bumping Gawain so hard it causes mini shockwaves. His line to Tristan (and for some reason, Caesar as well)?
    Tristan. Being unfaithful is never a good idea.
    • And hilariously, Tristan takes offense on that:
    Sir Percival. Yet another glorious Knight of the Round Table has joined us. That aside, he's picking a fight with me so I'll rise to the challenge. The bastard.
  • Morgan is... not happy that Habetrot's Noble Phantasm is now a BFG that fires an equally big bullet, thanks to us:
    My friend. My knight. Just how many times have I been saved by that strength of yours. Even if it is a different you, seeing your smile brings me joy. ...It brings me joy, but... What's with that Noble Phantasm of yours!? There is no need for such a thing at a wedding! Curse you, Chaldea, I won't forgive you...!
  • Oberon gets to finally interact with Shakespeare in Chaldea.
    "Dear William Shakespeare, Thank you for the wonderful script. I'll treasure it all my life. I'd like to take it with me to the grave..." Aaand, done. Could you deliver this to that shit stain for me? Oh, careful. I put a ton of poison into the wax seal, so absolutely do not touch it.
  • Then there's Oberon's line towards Queen Medb, who he addresses as though they're high school students. The tone sells it.
    Wait, wait! Medb rocks! So that's what she's like when she lives for love! I prefer the version that lives her life the way she wants!
  • If the player has Oberon Vortigern and any of the playable Lostbelt Kings, he'll outright insult them with the fact that he managed to accomplish his goals while the rest of them failed because of Chaldea. One must wonder how pissed they'd be to hear that.
    The rulers of the Lostbelts? I respect them, of course. After all, each and every one of them yielded to Chaldea. So wise, so mature, those kings and queens! Oh, but...don't lump me in with them. They're just a bunch of wretched losers. I, on the other hand, actually accomplished what I set out to do.
  • When Lady Avalon/Proto Merlin sees that her world's Arthur is in Chaldea and he's heading in her direction, she panicks and tries to pretend to not know him, then books it when he doesn't fall for it and chases after her.
• Different Servants hold different attitudes towards the Holy Grail. Some of them value its ability to grant its user's wishes, some act indifferent to it as if it's nonexistent, a few of them want to destroy it, and some want to use it for things it's not intended to be used for. Notable comical examples include:
  • Altria outright declares she despises Holy Grails and shall destroy them on sight. Napoleon also claims he shall blow up the Holy Grail with his cannon. Salieri even wonders if the Holy Grail will make wonderful sounds when he breaks it apart.
  • Frankenstein merely reacts in a Haughty "Hmph".
  • Gilgamesh, Shuten-douji and Quetzalcoatl treat the Holy Grails as wine goblets, although Gil does comment on the bloody taste.
  • Okada Izou wishes to gain a huge sum of money.
  • Anastasia shows confusion at the idea of an item more expensive than her family's Fabergé Eggs, and she makes an embarrassed little moan when she discovers the Grail functions differently.
  • Ryougi Shiki (Assassin) does not believe the Holy Grail actually exists. Instead, she believes it's a mere lie fabricated by some salesmen to sell their products.
  • Red Hare believes it would become a perfect manger made of gold.
  • At first, Okita Souji is overjoyed at the idea of a Holy Grail, cheerfully believing her own sickness will be cured. However, turns out the Holy Grail is unable to do so, since it's a part of her skill as a Heroic Spirit. This makes Okita so disappointed that she cries in dismay.
  • While Jeanne d'Arc (Ruler) herself wishes nothing regarding the Holy Grail, her Swimsuit version wishes to create more sea water around the world.
  • Li Shuwen (Old) wishes to fight his younger self.
  • Fergus wishes to make amends with his ex-girlfriends and insists that it's Serious Business.
  • At first, BB seems to praise the idea of a Holy Grail as awesome, before going on to say it would be granting wishes for foolish humans who haven't thought things through, so its only duty would be causing constant self-destruction.
  • Mori Nagayoshi thinks the Grail's gold coloring is just too tacky for usage in a tea ceremony.
  • Artemis gleefully presents the idea of the Holy Grail to Orion and claims it will be used as a nuptial cup. Orion becomes upset by her disregard over historical settings.
  • Tam Lin Lancelot in her first or second Ascension forms has a desire to eat the Grail after hearing that it makes great fuel.
  • Tam Lin Tristan in her first or second Ascension forms originally thought about turning the Holy Grail into heels. When she saw that others had silly wishes to turn the Grail into a saucepan, a bell, a rice bowl dish and that she would have to get in line, she ditches the idea entirely, not wanting to be seen on their level.
• Ashiya Douman has a few notable lines for other Servants who don't trust such a blatantly evil presence at Chaldea.
  • Katou Danzou has apparently been so intensely staring at Douman that it actually intimidates the latter.
  • Sei Shounagon takes it a step further by trying to strip him, with Douman awkwardly protesting for her to stop.
  • On the flipside, Nursery Rhyme and friends don't really care, but also don't want to play with something as gross as his proposed shikigami and demand that he play house with them by pulling on his hair until he agrees to do so. Because it's Douman, he decides he wants to be one of the Obnoxious In-Laws.
  • His line for Murasaki ends up with Douman being very dejected that Seimei has zero things that he'd want to pass to Douman via Murasaki.
• Jinako/Ganesha's lines are one of the funniest out of all the servants due to her Genre Savvy and NEET tendencies:
  • If her bond level is raised without ascending her, her Bond lines as a statue start off with her trying to be mysterious, getting more irritated before asking if the protagonist has a petrification fetish or something at bond 4. She irritatedly yells to let her out of the statue already in her bond 5 line.
  • One of her dialogues is telling the protagonist to finish their dailies.
  • If you have Parvati, she expresses surprise that Ganesha's mother is in front of her before she shoots herself in the foot for spilling out what she thinks of her.
  • Her interaction with fellow NEET Osakebehime is pure gold. She stops herself from making a Jojo reference before trying to one-up her by declaring she's lazier than her, making herself more miserable in the process.
    Jinako: This is...! The presence of the same kind of sta... I mean servant!
  • She calls Ashwatthama a Yankee, saying that he's the kind of man who is an enemy of NEETs, and burrows in her futon to hide from him.
  • She thinks that Kiara Sessyoin is a very nice person, due to her not being aware of what happened in the CCC true ending.
  • In her bond 2 line when ascended, she's angry that the protagonist is looking at her like she's useless baggage, before saying that she's also a victim of circumstances.
  • her bond 3 line has her thinking there's a huge conspiracy in Chaldea due to them forcing her to exercise and lose weight while saying the laws of physics are lost on her.
  • She takes pity on the protagonist for not giving up on her and tries to give the protagonist a lap pillow but is disappointed when they ran away from her in her bond 4 line.
• Zenobia praises Summer Raikou's job as a shadow prefect to keep morals in line. She'd like to give help... except that Raikou is already running with a giant sword at hand towards her and Zenobia is dumbfounded on why. Bonus points for counting as Hypocritical Humor; because Raikou can get too similar with Zenobia anyways in her own final ascension
• Charlemagne's line for Roland has him stating that he is cool even without his clothes on. He then however goes on to back-pedal, and specifically demands that Roland keep his clothes on.
• Kriemhild's line for Sieg has her asking Sieg to change his name to "Hans" or "Schmidt" as he would otherwise just die while trying to be a hero. However, since Sieg suffered from two Disney Deaths in Fate/Apocrypha, the homunculus ends up averting his gaze and flees from her, causing Kriemhild to demand he sit down and tell her about everything he's done.
• Xu Fu's line for Consort Yu has her Squee so hard she breaks the fourth wall.
  Xu Fu: Oh, I can die happy now. I can be erased from the world. Play the sound effect. [Servant death sound effect plays]
• Without the responsibilities of the Avalon le Fae in the summer heat, Altria Caster and Morgan have ignited their version of The Glorious War of Sisterly Rivalry.
  Altria Caster (Berserker): Speaking of summer, it's the time for ghost stories, right? Yes, Altria Caster, here I go! "When I woke up in the morning, I couldn't believe my eyes. The Winter Queen had changed into a swimsuit and rode into the summer paradise with the grace of a model. Not only was my spine frozen, but my brain too. Seriously."
  Morgan (Summer): You have shown your true nature, Wild Boar of Tintagel! Shame on you, especially those bunny ears.

Interludes

Some interludes have you goofing around with the featured Servant:

• Medea's interlude happens in her fantasy creation, where she's created "Jasonland", complete with Jason-themed playgrounds, Jason mascots, and also Jason-themed merchandise, all presided over by a facsimile of her Lily self who goes by "Princess Medea." After finishing your business here, Medea warns you to not tell the others about this.
• Emiya’s interlude has him lecturing the Master (you) on information regarding Servants^note being a Master veteran, he has experience on both sides of the contract, but he keeps getting interrupted by different types of enemies.
  • And the third time he gets interrupted, he says he's ready for anything, but what comes are... amazons. And they’re targeting him specifically. Harem protag EX at work!
  • And Emiya asks if Roman is the one who led them to his group. Which he denies.
• D'Eon's interlude has you "decide" what sex you see him/her as. This doesn't influence gameplay in the slightest.
• It turns out you and Karna (of all people) have a special handshake. Mash is upset that she hasn't been aware that "such a wonderful greeting" existed.
  Protagonist: HEY YO CHALDELUXE!!
  Karna: Hey yo, Chaldeluxe.
  [Karna high fives you!!]
• Lancer Altria's interlude happens because Merlin's screwing around with her dream. The entire event is effectively various Servants bullying her into admitting how much she cares for the protagonist.
  • First Fionn shows up and tries to run off with the protagonist, only for Altria to attack him. When he asks which one the protagonist will go with, they choose Altria. A flustered Altria says that's only natural, until Fionn asks how she'd have reacted if they had chosen him instead. She promptly retorts that even she'd cry if that happened.
  • Then Romulus appears and begins lecturing her on being afraid of her own power. After the fight, he goads the protagonist into yelling aloud that they love Altria, causing her to light up like Rhongomyniad.
  • Then Gil and Ozy pop in. Unlike the others, they're clearly there to mess with Altria, so after spending the interlude helping Altria come to grips with humanity again, the protagonist immediately tells her to "deliver divine punishment".
• Medusa has you be a pretend couple with her to thwart her sisters' scheme to arrange her a marriage.
• Zhuge Liang's third interlude has him deal with his final Ascension which makes him younger. His reaction:
  Young Waver: AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! W-W-W-W-WHAT THE BLOODY HELL!?
  • He then accuses the Gorgon Sisters and goes to kick their asses. After they're defeated twice...
    Euryale: RIIIIIIIIIIISE, MEDUUUUUUSAAAAAAA!!!
    Medusa: First Sister, Second Sister… Um, would you mind not calling me out like you’re summoning a giant robot—
  • Everyone, except for Mash, then in some way insults Medusa's large chest.
  • The three sisters claim they've now unlocked a Super Form after you defeat Medusa and try to gang up on you for the third section of his interlude. They don't.
  • His second interlude has a couple funny Comically Serious moments, with El-Melloi II matter-of-factly responding to Fou's noises as if they're perfectly comprehensible human speech. Fou says, "Nnnng... kyau, kyaaaau!" and El-Melloi II's response is, "Nothing, I was just looking at the sea."
• Tamamo's is about her competing with Kiyohime via e-mail to show up one another with how much they love their Master.
• Tamamo Cat's is about finding the finest ingredients for Master. You end up assaulting a shepherd for his sheep (David) and try to attack a Servant for his fine beef (Asterios).
• Stheno's interludes have her dupe you into thinking there's treasure in her cave. Twice. In the second one, she humiliates Medusa by coming into the cave around the time she's shedding skin like a snake.
• Bedivere's interlude is subdued and peaceful, but also demonstrates how Adorkable he can be in demonstrating his loyalty. After he takes you to the simulation room to replicate a fishing trip with Tristan, all seems well until you snag something big on the end of the line - which turns out to be not a fish, but a Demonic Beast, due to a miscalculation when he set up the simulation in the first place. After the ensuing fight, Bedivere then digs himself deeper when he asks if the two of you could eat the Demonic Beasts' bodies, claiming that as Saber taught him, meat is meat no matter the source. You visibly back away from him, much to his consternation, and he later has to apologize for unnerving you like that. Even funnier still, come the Anastasia Lostbelt, hunting Demonic Beasts for sustenance is a fact of life among the Yaga - so you're essentially forced to heed Bedi's advice, because the Shadow Border has all but run out of normal food!
• Berserker Lancelot's second interlude is all about how Dr. Roman really, really wants to see what's under his helmet. He uses a simulation to throw tougher and tougher enemies at you until he slips up and accidentally activates a simulation of Gilgamesh. Then, when Mash admits to him that they just wanted to see his face, Lancelot... simply takes his helmet off. Problem is, they can't make out his face because his other Noble Phantasm, For Someone's Glory, is still active.
• Fergus' interlude is all about how he really wants to flirt with the female Servants. Dr. Roman's okay with this, but only for scientific purposes of course. He then ends up trying to flirt with Kiyohime, Brynhild and Nightingale.
  • While the first two encounters go about as well as expected, with Fergus wisely deciding to run away after realizing what he got himself into, his pass at Nightingale goes very differently. After agreeing to a battle with a night with Nightingale as the prize, Fergus goes on to win and Nightingale's reaction can be summed up as "well, to the victor go the spoils then" and then she offers herself up... to the player. Because they were the one giving commands, so obviously it's their victory.
  • Also, when Mash decides to make a bet on how bad Fergus will bomb his attempt, one option the player can choose is "MUDA MUDA MUDA".
• Mysterious Heroine X participates in a tournament to defeat Sabers and ends up against Mordred and Nero, both completely baffled by this lady running around, screaming about killing them. Then the protagonists suddenly teleport to England for the final battle against Altria. After winning, she proclaims it's time to go to the True Holy Grail War of Sabers. Mash wakes Mysterious Heroine X up at the end because it's time for dinner.
• Raikou's Interlude tells us about her story with Ushi Gozen and when Raikou "killed" herself to seal Ushi Gozen. It's serious and all... then we get this line, continuing the proud Fate tradition:
  Kintoki: "What happens if you kill yourself? You die, of course."
• Penthesilea's Interlude begins with Ritsuka and Mash being called in for a secret meeting between Chaldea's Servants regarding how to deal with Achilles and Penthesilea (specifically, the absolute, raging mad-on that Penthesilea has for Achilles and the fact that the both of them are together in one space in Chaldea). The convo continues at length, with everyone using "A and P" to refer to them, until Hektor accidentally lets slip Achilles's real name:
  Holmes: Can I take that as your consent to participate in our plan?
  Hektor: What else can I do, right? But you'll have to forgive me if I end up running away. Like I keep saying, I don't ever want to fight Achilles again if I can help — !
  [music stops]
  Ritsuka: Ah.
  Moriarty: Ah.
  Mash: ...
  Da Vinci: What the hell?! The whole reason we're using code words is because it's too dangerous to even mention their real ones right now! You realize that, don't you?! That's why you've gotta call him A, dammit!
  Holmes: ...I'm afraid it is too late now.
  [everyone hears running, just before Penthesilea, in full raging berserk mode, smashes through the wall of the library as the "uh-oh" theme starts playing]
  Penthesilea (in giant text): WHO SAID "ACHILLES"?!
• Medea Lily needs an ingredient to create an infinite pancake for her second interlude. So naturally she summons a Demon Pillar (for its magical properties) and after defeating it, squishes it and mixes it up in the pancake mix. No one's quite sure what to say after that.
• In Amakusa's Interlude, when he says that he's a third rate Servant and maybe barely qualified as a Caster, you can suggest he ask Edison to teach him. Amakusa's reaction?
  "Mr. Edison... I'm sorry, a Revelation just came upon me. A vision of my arm undergoing Conceptual Improvement until it become a rocket^note i.e. those arms that detached and could fly around by the climax of Apocrypha... and the birth of Shin Amakusa Shirou."
• David's Interlude has him bicker with Roman. It's funny and heartwarming as Roman gets to enjoy a few moments with his father.
  • David complains that unlike dragons, giants don't have hoarded treasure.
    David: Dragonslayers are lucky, dragons are treasure-holding mega banks...
    Roman: You can ignore that ossan's rambling, protagonist!
    David: How rude! Call me ''onii-san'' or ''ojii-san'' instead!
    Roman: Okay, okay, onii-san.
  • When the team run into giant enemies, David leans on the fourth wall a little bit.
    David: Large enemies have AoE attacks, this is common sense in my era.
    Roman: Oh... so that's why you're good at protecting the entire team. I thought those skills are for protecting sheep...
• During Shakespeare's Interlude, a random civilian declares his love for Mash and asks to make a baby with her after seeing her fight off some werewolves that were summoned by Shakespeare in the first place to put on a "show".
• Chloe's interlude has her trying to find Servants that can supply her with more mana. Given how she gets it, the whole interlude is one long exercise in hilarity.
  • The pre-"mission" conversation revealing that Chloe has been getting "snacks" from the Protagonist. Mash isn't impressed.
  • First up on her mark is Jack, Nursery Rhyme, Medea Lily, and Chacha, who are having a tea party...but everyone keeps saying "chacha" all because Chacha started shouting her name and the others thought it was proper etiquette at a Japanese tea ceremony (and Chacha is the one to start complaining about it).
  • Next up on the list, Chloe wants to try her luck on a Saber (preferably a certain king) or a Berserker, only to get Nightingale. Chloe expresses annoyance in that she was dropping hints for Altria or Altera to show up and tries to walk away, but the protagonist eggs her on to Mash's disbelief. After the epic battle (which could have taken up three manga volumes if adapted), Chloe wins but once again tries to walk away from the defeated Nightingale, only for the protagonist and Mash to tell her to just kiss her already so this all didn't go to waste. Suddenly, Nightnigale regains consciousness after being kissed to the surprise of everyone else, suddenly manhandling Chloe saying that she did CPR incorrectly. She then proceeds to do CPR on Chloe... her style.
    Nightingale: Wrong....wrongwrongwrongwrong!! Everything is wrong!!
    Mash: Nightingale's awake! No, perhaps she was never unconscious...
    Chloe: So what am I wrong about!?
    Nightingale: Everything! Your resuscitation procedure is totally wrong!
    Chloe: Huh? Resuscitation!? Huh!?
    Mash: Oh, Nightingale just reached out and grabbed Chloe's throat...
    Nightingale: First, find the airway! Tilt the face sideways, and if there is anything inside the mouth, scoop it out with your fingers!
    Chloe: Bleeah... Your finger...! Ack!
    Nightingale: Lift up the chin, pinch the nose and blow in with all your might for one second!
    Chloe: Hey, I—hrmgh! ACK!
    Mash: I don't think you need to breathe with all your might...
    Nightingale: But most important are chest compressions! Punch the chest one hundred times per minute to force the heart to restart!
    Chloe: (Cough)... Heart!? But it didn't stop... Ow...owowowowowow!?
    Mash: Multiple hits with no rest between them!?
    Nightingale: ...You have just witnessed a chief modern medical technique to combat death. It is known as CPR.
    Chloe: ...That isn't...right...
    Mash: Um. I don't know how to react to that.
  • As the chaos continues, fliers have been put up around Chaldea's walls stating: "Serial kisser on the loose. Female Servants are advised to stay in their rooms." Chloe is NOT amused.
  • The ending. After Chloe has her way with Illya as usual, Mash reveals that Chaldea supplies its Servants with mana automatically, so Chloe never needed to do this... only for Chloe to reveal she knew that all along (which is why she was calling these kisses "snacks"). Mash promptly realizes that this means her "snacks" from the Protagonist were pointless, who beats a hasty retreat with Mash hot on their tail. Once they're out of earshot, Chloe mutters the real reason she went through all this trouble: she was trying to get Mash to make a move.
• Astolfo's Interlude is stupidly fun. He suddenly drags you to France to find Roland. There, the citizens are traumatized because Roland is running around naked and berserking when they try to put clothes on him. The citizens promptly attack Astolfo because he is Roland's friend.
  • Roland is still running around naked, even climbing and mounting a 200-year old saint's statue's head and screaming, "I am the king of the world!"
    Soldier: The kids cried... the women blushed but stared... I'm starting to get really tired of living a proper life.
    Mash: Please get a hold of yourself. It's okay. Please live a proper life! [The soldier then begins hallucinating]
  • After calming the soldier, the party find barefoot footprints, and Roland's the only person crazy enough to walk across a wasteland barefoot. Astolfo then decides to narrate his tracking and findings. Roland climbed a tree, stole a bird egg, and ate it, but as he wasn't satisfied, he attacked a random wyvern and ate it too... raw. This led to food poisoning and him throwing up and stepping all over it. Roland slept for a bit but was awoken to a horse rushing him, kicking his back, and causing him to spurt blood from the mouth. He called out to the rider, and after an argument, choked the rider and left him beneath a tree, stealing the horse and attempting to ride it naked and bareback. This entire story is relayed through Astolfo's own findings and his interviews with the rider and the horse itself, apparently.
  • After that, the party finally find Roland (thankfully he's fully clothed) with help from the horse. The first thing he does is confess his love to Mash.
    Roland: You said your name is Mash Kyrielite. What a beautiful name... fitting for someone as beautiful as you...
    Mash: Eh, um... thank you very much.
    Roland: The moon out tonight is... beautiful...
    Mash: !?
    Astolfo: Eh?
    Protagonist: [dialogue option] Wh-what was that?
    Mash: I-I-I-I have no idea! I'm not sure if those were romantic words or... I really don't have any experience with that!
  • It's then revealed that this Roland is actually something like leftover emotions. After we beat it, Roland puffs out of existence, but not before declaring this:
    Roland: At least... before I die... I wanted to... Expose everything...
• In Brynhild's Interlude, the player finds that the enemy to be faced is the embodiment of her burning passion for Sigurd. The thing is, it's in a snowfield, leading to the line:
  Protagonist: ...so, the snow is on fire.
• In Suzuka Gozen's Interlude:
  • She wants to practice at being a high school student and tries to use a machine that Da Vinci keeps telling everyone to not use. It turns out to be a karaoke machine and Nero and Elisabeth are already using it. Suzuka outright tells them their singing is really bad and asks them to leave. They claim it's just a rehearsal and won't leave for a few hours, which irritates Suzuka so much she commences battle.
  • After the battle destroys the karaoke machine, she decides to do the "JK dating" thing and looks for men to try practice dating with, then rejects everyone from Diarmuid to Astolfo for a variety of reasons; eventually this montage becomes so repetitive the game literally fast-forwards through the entire process. Her rejection of Gilgamesh deserves special mention, as he's left speechless when Suzuka calls him stuck-up and declares she prefers Kid Gil to him. She then runs into Fergus who she finds interesting until they get into a case of propositioning each other for a "fight": Fergus was discussing possibly them having sex, she was discussing possibly having a spar.
• Poor Consort Yu probably becomes the Butt-Monkey of Chaldea in just one interlude:
  • One of her problems is how to keep a suitable relationship with the protagonist as a Servant, despite also being his/her senior. While in her Second Ascension. Even Gao Changgong calls her out for it.
  • To solve her frustrations, Gao Changgong suggests asking other summoned Gods for better solutions...And they consult Ishtar, Parvati and Jaguar Warrior. Who all prefer Emiya (in a face suitable for wearing an apron) as a better consultant. The conversation includes asking if Emiya had ever met anyone as a Servant that he had a grudge against in life.
  Emiya: ...(Would rather be anywhere but here)
  • After being defeated in a simulation battle (as Emiya suggested and Sion agreed), Chaldea Servants who participated in Lostbelt 2.3 arrive and put up a plan: reverse their roles in 2.3 and fight again...And it turns out Yu is a terrible Master. It's so bad that she even questions if Gao Changgong held back in the Lostbelt. ^note In game terms, she casts a lot of debuffs on her Servants which makes the fight incredibly easy despite you only being able to use Gao Changgong. Not helped by the fact that Holmes had already found out she tampered her grade over Tactics.
  • Things go up to eleven when Xiang Yu joins the fray and runs through another simulation battle...Except this time Yu becomes so ashamed she reduces all her Servants' HP down to 1 along with a dump of debuffs, before she runs away calling the protagonist cheap. Xiang Yu then apologizes for her, but even Spartacus and Red Hare question if she's a "soft lady" as he described.
  • And it turns out why the protagonist played nice to her all along: he/she receives stupidly high payments from Xiang Yu for all her orders, the most recent in the ballpark of 2 million QP. While Mash kindly informs the protagonist that she will help them return the extra QP to Xiang Yu the rest of the crew becomes worried over the couple's life in Chaldea, especially since the likes of Caesar or David will find those two as easy marks.
• Medb's Interlude references and re-confirms^note Meltryllis originally confirmed this in EXTRA CCC, by specifically stating she has A+ riding skill because she Really Gets Around a running joke in the Fate series regarding the Riding skill. To be precise, yes, the Riding skill also includes "riding a man", as in having sex with him.
• In Li Shuwen's Interlude, the party eventually stumble into Zhuge Liang, and both of the player's dialogue options express sheer confusion at why he's here. Turns out he was the ZHuge martial artist that some children were talking about earlier.
  ZHuge Martial Artist: "I am beginning to suspect the horrid possibility that I was summoned here as a one-off joke."
• Jaguar Warrior's interlude is as ridiculous as she is.
  • The first half has her barging in on a tea party that the protagonist, Mash, Ishtar and Emiya are having to drag them to Fuyuki.
    • Emiya is completely stunned at seeing Jaguar Warrior possessing Taiga due to not having seen her before.
    • Originally she wanted to bring more people connected to her with Pārvatī and Kiritsugu both sensing this and running away from Emiya's room as a result.
    • Jaguar Warrior states she hates lions because they would steal her food if they sat at the same table. Seems Taiga has some lingering resentment on Altria's Big Eater tendencies.
  • The second half has Jaguar Warrior dragging Emiya and the protagonist to redeem delinquents in London ... by beating them up.
    • Jaguar Warrior reveals that she couldn't find Ishtar no matter how hard she looked which makes Emiya curse that she was able to escape.
    • Jaguar Warrior states Emiya is "Reformed Delinquent No. 1" who was a former playboy that bleached his hair and was reformed when Jaguar Warrior set him straight by beating him.
    • They meet Cú Chulainn who is on a stroll who Jaguar Warrior sees as a delinquent due to his earrings and his full body leotard. She then blames Cú's "fall" to delinquency on Scáthach for not raising him right such as teaching him an instant death move that never works. After the fight Cú is forced to join them as "Reformed Delinquent No. 2".
    • They then meet Kintoki happily talking with a golden retriever which sets off Jaguar Warrior due to his blond hair and fashion style. Cú feels that Kintoki is too naive while Emiya is scared that Raikou might appear due to Jaguar Warrior picking a fight with Kintoki. Kintoki gets mad when Jaguar Warrior states she intends to dye his hair black and gets serious.
• Scheherazade's interlude is quite possibly the longest interlude in the game at EIGHT segments, basically being a retelling of the group's journey through Fuyuki and the seven singularities, with each part capped off by an altered version of each arc's Climax Boss. Naturally, the tale has more than a few laughs.
  • While telling Scheherazade about the journey through Okeanos, Drake and Heracles both get mentioned, causing Scheherazade to mention that she had attempted to apolgize to both of them (with her usual Dogeza method) for invoving them against their will in the whole Agartha plot. Drake brushes it off since she doesn't remember anything about the incident, then tells Scheherazade to stand up because she prefers the view from the front anyway. As for Herc... he ignores her completely, simply stepping over the prostrate Scheherazade like she isn't even there and continuing on his way.
  • During the London segment, Scheherazade shows a particular fascination for Babbage, because his armor looks INCREDIBLY safe, to the point where she goes dreamy-eyed at the idea of being so well-protected, and considers commissioning the actual Babbage for a set for herself. She only gives up on the idea when the protagonist and Mash point out that the steam-powered armor would probably boil her alive.
  • When covering Kintoki and Tamamo's appearance, Scheherazade comments that "we don't have any reliable allies here" and skips over them completely. Tamamo dons an irritated expression in the background, as if she knows what Scheherazade is saying about her.
  • On America's retelling, she mentions that while she usually respects healers for their capacity for saving lives, Nightingale scares the crap out of her and she'd take her chances with any injuries she had rather than let Florence tend to her. She also hastily skips over the description of the Celts because Fergus is among their number.
• Passionlip's interlude is full of hilarity:
  • BB, as usual, is a barrel of Hypocritical Humor. Particularly when she calls out Passionlip's character designer on Lip's proportions. BB is somewhat taken aback by the protagonist pointing out that she designed Lip and tries to explain herself, only to casually admit that she designed Passionlip's huge chest and Breast Valley the way she did because she thought it would be funny. Another layer of this joke comes from the fact that Wada Arco, Passionlip and BB's character designer, is also a woman.
    BB: Seriously, has whoever did that never seen an actual woman before!?
    Protagonist: But you're the one who made her...
  • One of the fights is Hijitaka bullying Passionlip... because she called him a Glass Cannon with no survivability. And also because she has poor posture that doesn't flaunt her "talents" enough. Then he says next maybe he'll go after Okita and get her to eat whatever Passionlip is so that she might fill out a bit more herself, leading to Okita silently joining your side in the fight and dragging him off afterward.
  • After Hijikata is defeated, Passionlip sees the protagonist and decides that she must be dreaming, which means things should go how SHE wants them to. Naturally, the next logical step is to lie down and let her Master do whatever they want to her.
  • Apparently Passionlip and the protagonist had to fight all the Servants who bullied Lip for thoughtlessly insulting them... which takes Lip about five text boxes to fully list. Fortunately for the player, most of those fights happen off-screen.
  • For the finale, BB calls in Meltryllis to be the Final Boss for Passionlip to defeat... only for Melt to casually change sides and join you just to spite BB for roping her into this.
    Passionlip: I'm so glad Melt understands me!
    Protagonist: I'm pretty sure she just did that to piss off BB.
    Passionlip: Yeah, probably. But deep down I know there was some sisterly affection in there!
  • At the end of it all, Passionlip unlocks a new power... which she immediately unleashes on BB. With her Noble Phantasm. It's one of the few times BB seems to be genuinely caught off-guard.
    BB: Oh shit! I'm glad this worked out like I wanted, but I didn't think I'd be taking it head-on!!!
• Wu Zetian's interlude lets you know what kind of story you're in for with the first few lines.
  Wu Zetian: (in giant text) THIS WILL NOT STAND!
  Protagonist: (dialog option) Hopping mad right out of the gate!?
  • It turns out the reason she's so pissed is because someone sent her a challenge letter that also calls her out for her fears of ghosts and cats. Oh, and she has to translate the letter for you and Mash because it's in Chinese, which neither of you can read, angering Wu yet again.
  • Wu finally decides to assign a nickname to Mash as well, and gives her a name that references her purple coloring. Mash is pleased with the name until Wu also mentions that the full name translates to "Seaweed".
  • The end of the interlude reveals that Wu set the whole thing up herself (with the help of some hired servants and some memory-altering potions from Paracelsus) and seemingly overcomes her ghost phobia when adrenaline helps to defeat several of them without fear. She praises herself for having removed one of her weaknesses, only for Fou (who had been absent from the Interlude until now) to drop from a trap she had forgotten about, directly on her head. After the "cat" causes her to flee in terror, she runs into several ghost-related servants^note Ereshkigal and Darius training their respective undead minions, Hessian Lobo taking a nap with his headless rider, and First Hassan apparently just hanging around doing nothing in particular, reigniting her fear of ghosts and terrifying her further. Wu later complains to Sanzang that she hadn't hired any of them and demands to know why they were even there.
• At the end of Sima Yi's interlude, Reines asks Sima Yi if it's fine for him to have a female vessel.
  Sima Yi: I don't really care about my vessel's gender. Besides, I once dressed in women's clothes and it's not bad.
  Lord El-Melloi II (???): Wait, seriously? You actually did THAT?
  Sima Yi: Is that Zhuge Liang? I thought he's been sleeping in that man's body.
  Lord El-Melloi II: Sorry, I spaced out a bit. What are we talking about again?
  Sima Yi: KONGMING, YOU BASTARD! COME OUT THERE AND WE'LL SETTLE THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL!
• Ishtar's interlude is extremely silly. First of all, it's entitled Ishtar's Eleven, which should tell you what it's about. Secondly, Gilgamesh very clearly anticipated that Ishtar would try to raid his treasury at some point, and set up all of its defenses SPECIFICALLY to hard counter her abilities (and, in a perfect use of Gameplay and Story Integration, all of the defenses are Lancer-class enemies). At one point, Ishtar gets so dazzled by a door deliberately designed to entice her that she fails to realize it's a mimic...and the next thing we know, the door starts to EAT her.
  Fujimaru: "Obvious trap is obvious."
  • Then Gilgamesh himself shows up. It turns out that Ishtar falling into so many traps was setting off a ton of alarms, and they were disturbing the Underworld so much that Ereshkigal more or less kicked Gilgamesh out of Kur to make him make the alarms stop. Then he reveals that he used some Loophole Abuse to weasel out of the contract he made to pay Ishtar. This devolves into a screaming match between the two.
  • The interlude also makes a few humorous references to Fate/stay night. First, Ishtar mentions that lately her desire for gems has gone way up. Mash theorizes it's due to her vessel (which it absolutely is, but Mash has no way of knowing for certain); Ishtar more or less shrugs and says it could also be just a phase. There's also a point where Ishtar makes the remark that "Being correct and being right can be two very different things!"
• Gawain's interlude has the prized ascension materials he gathered as a present for you being stolen, whereupon you battle your way through the culprits. After getting most of the Knight Medals back from his half-sister Mordred, he decrees a Cool and Unusual Punishment: she must eat from his menu for an entire month.
  Mordred: Everyone in my family is freakin' nuts!
• In Circe's interlude, the possible explanations of Jason's unavailability.
  Jason got hit by a barrel of apples and knocked out...
  Jason died a hero's death in defense of his ship, I hear.
• Semiramis' interlude has her calling for the protagonist and Shakespeare via a carrier pigeon that refuses to leave Shakespeare's head (which he ends up not minding terribly, aside from the concern that it may defecate on his head). The note from Semiramis (which is magically enchanted to alert her when it's been read) demands that they go meet with her 30 seconds after reading the note, and if they fail to arrive in time, she'll trap them in an illusion of stripping down naked to bathe... in the middle of the dining hall. They both take off for her room without a word (aside from Shakespeare complaining on the way that he always gets caught up in these situations).
• Dantes' interlude has Nightingale catching Dantes watching over the Protagonist in their sleep. She then declares she needs to perform an emergency surgery, which confuses him since the Protagonist isn't injured before saying it's him who needs it since he keeps calling her "Mercédès", therefore, his mental state must be injured. He actually loses his cool as she threatens him with her weapons.
  Nightingale: No, measures will be taken.
  Dantes: Don't you dare come at me with a scalpel in one hand and a gun in the other. At least hold the scalpel with your dominant hand. No, that's not what I meant to say!
• Valkyrie's Interlude starts with the three Valkyries playing a dating sim, advised by Tomoe Gozen (who got advice herself from El-Melloi II). It turns out that Brynhild told her sisters they could learn about love, but when she did, all three of them blushed heavily, with Hildr in denial, Ortlinde overheating, and Thrúd caught in a loop.
  Brynhild: Hehehe. Ahh, this takes me back. You three remind me of myself when I was younger.
  Hildr: Sisteeer!
  • Later, Sigurd gives the Valkyries the same words Brynhild once said to him. His explanation is inspiring, but Thrúd's initial bemusement is perfectly understandable.
    Sigurd: Get lost!
    Thrúd: Huh!?
  • Sigurd then gives the girls an order on the protagonist's behalf.
    Sigurd: No more than one hour of gaming per day!
  • The interlude ends with Tomoe Gozen successfully arguing for the Valkyries to get two hours of gaming per day, then introducing them to a fighting game instead of a dating sim.
• Ivan the Terrible's Interlude:
  • The big question on Ivan's mind:
    Ivan: WHY AM I AN ELEPHANT!?
  • Later, it seems that Nero's rubbed off on him:
    Ivan: It's me! Umu!... Uh, I mean, it is I!
  • After arriving in the Singularity for rare books, Iskandar seems ready to plunder the library of all their books. Mash interjects, saying that it's not a good idea. Ivan agrees and tells him that plundering is only a last resort and that they pay for the books instead. The player can choose to say that they're broke, eliciting this response:
    Ivan: ...
    ...
    Plundering it is.
• Anastasia's Interlude is about her trying to prank the protagonist with Viy's power, only for things to go off the rails rather quickly.
  • It starts with her telling the protagonist that she's going to be her true self around them. Or as she puts it...
  Anastasia: I am... an irredeemable imp.
  • Her first prank involves changing the protagonist's room into a beach and dousing them with water when they wake up, then changing the combat simulator to a random setting, which ends up being the lava field from the second Halloween event. How does the protagonist know this? The Yandere trio of Raikou, Kiyohime, and Serenity jump out of the lava at them. Anastasia is very confused at how Servants can swim in lava.
  • After fighting the trio, Anastasia is tired of the heat and declares she won't let Viy mess with the settings anymore. She still defends Viy as adorable, even though some people complain about him and wish he'd stop glomming on to the back of their heads.
    The Protagonist: Me! I'M "some people"!
    Anastasia: Hehehe, yes, I suppose you are, aren't you?
  • The simulator then changes to a frozen cell, which annoys Anastasia just as much as the lava field.
    Anastasia: It's freezing.
    The Protagonist: If it's not one thing, it's another!
  • They then find themselves in a hall with food, which doesn't do anything because it's a simulation, prompting Anastasia to claim it's like eating mist and ask this question.
    Anastasia: And in that case, does that mean I've become a wise parsley, able to live off nothing but the faintest drops of dew?
    The Protagonist: Parsley? ...Ohhh, are you thinking of "sage"? 'Cause if so, that kind of sage isn't a plant.
    Anastasia: ...I swear, English can be so difficult sometimes. Why can't you all keep things simple and just speak Russian like civilized folk!?
    The Protagonist: From my perspective, I could say the same to you!
    Anastasia: ...Fair enough.
  • They then fight Jason, Medea, and Heracles, after Anastasia makes mention of Jason and the character of the same name from the Friday the 13th movies, admitting she finds it funny to imagine the Servant Jason running around with a shaved head and a hockey mask.
• The Prince of Lan Ling's Interlude has him talk with Jason and Paris about his face, with the former commenting on how such features would have got him blessed or cursed in Greece and how he would have suffered either way. Jason then mentions another Servant who wore a mask: Pency. When Lan Ling asks who Pency is, Jason describes her as short with abs that could grate cheese, which gives Paris and Apollo a bad feeling and makes them run away while an oblivious Jason shouts out a mangling on Pency's real name, which gets him a pummeling from her.
  Jason: Pencil-Lilia!
  Penthesilea: You mangled my name on purpose! DIE!!!
  • The interlude itself is framed like a documentary, with the final part revealing Blackbeard had been stalking Lan Ling the whole day, convinced the latter is hiding something because, in his own words, perfect guys like that always end up having a weird fetish or something. After a battle with him and Chen Gong (where it ends in the most obvious way possible, Blackbeard being used as ammunition), Blackbeard can only conclude...
    Blackbeard: He's handsome on the inside too!!!
• Qin Liangyu's Interlude reveals she suffers from Cuteness Proximity around giant pandas, and she and Reines are trying to recreate one in the simulator. Reines ends up dragging in a reluctant El-Melloi II, who complains about it but otherwise goes along with it.
  • The reason for all the attempts of creating a giant panda in the simulator failing turns out to be that the simulator itself has no clue what a giant panda actually is, forcing it to substitute with the closest thing it can find matching the requested animal. The closest substitute in question? Lobo.
  • In the end, they lost the data for giant pandas, but the protagonist cheers up Qin Liangyu with panda pastries and stories. This is told by Artemis, who says that she's there because Orion wanted to be painted like a panda, so she decided to burn him. This results in Orion complaining that everyone likes pandas instead of other bears.
    Orion: Won't somebody think of the brown bears!?
• Red Hare's interlude starts with him following the protagonist around, thinking they don't notice him. How does the protagonist get him to come out?
  The Protagonist: Hey look, a carrot!
  Red Hare: Did somebody say "carrot"!?
  The Protagonist: Sorry, the cake- I mean, carrot is a lie.
• Avicebron's interlude is a fighting contest pitting robotic Noble Phantasms against each other. The contestants are Avicebron, Babbage, Fran, Europa, Mecha Eli-chan Mk. II, Odysseus... and Hessian Lobo and Nursery Rhyme.
  Edison: All right, fess up! Who's the wise guy who heard "robo" and thought to bring Lobo instead!?
• Anastasia's 2nd interlude has the protagonist and Hessian Lobo enter her dream via Medea's spell. One of the side effects is that Hessian can finally talk, and he immediately takes the chance to ask the protagonist to tell Nursery Rhyme not to stick a pumpkin where his head would be anymore.
  Hessian: The worst part is that she carves it into a jack-o'-lantern and sticks a candle in it! Not at all pleasant!
• Kama's 2nd interlude has the protagonist and Parvati trying to wake Kama up after she's slept for several days. Sei Shonagon stops by and threatens to scribble on Kama's face if she doesn't wake up, having brought along Hokusai for that purpose. Hokusai isn't amused by this, but does admit to liking the idea of using a goddess as a canvas.
• The Queen of Sheba's 2nd Interlude reveals a number of her money-making shenanigans:
  • Selling a model robot resembling a strange bird to Circe. All the while Medea keeps shooting her aunt looks that seem like she's judging her. The Queen of Sheba even hums one of Circe's Shop lines from the Aeaean Spring Breeze event, much to the Falcon Witch's embarrassment.
  • Collecting debts. It's revealed that Goredolf hands out allowances to all of the Servants, yet there are a couple of them in huge debt.
    • First, she pays a visit to Oberon, who proceeds to snark at her:
    Oberon: "Oh Blanca, I wanted to show you this. This is the living creature called a "debt collector". Even though they themselves don't work, they make other people pay back money, even if it'll make them throw up blood."
    • Oberon, the King of Debts, owes money to Beni-enma, Vlad III, Europa, Ishtar, Miss Crane, Nightingale, Kama, Menuiere and Karna. One does wonder how he managed to convince literal goddesses (one of whom is a former Beast no less) and a couple of Debt Detesters to lend him money. Shakespeare also claimed to have lent Oberon money, but it's quickly revealed that he was just faking his IOU for the kicks.
    • Later on the Queen of Sheba reveals that Shakespeare also allowed her to chop up Oberon and use his body, wings, clothes and jewelry as collateral if needed, simply because he can^{Or maybe...}It could also be in retaliation for the poisoning attempt in one of Oberon's My Room lines. Oberon immediately gets the reference, first declaring that "not a drop of his blood must be spilled", and then cursing Shylock's name.
    • Next, she shows up at Izo's room. Izo tries to pretend he's not around by claiming to be Oberon, but the Queen of Sheba isn't buying any of it and welcomes herself into his room.
    Izo: "I'm Oberon! I don't know a genius of the sword called Izo! He's not here!"
    • Izo's debtor list includes Munenori, Kyokutei Bakin, Heracles, Red Hare, Ivan the Terrible, Kijyo Koyo and Karna (again). Karna, we know you're the Hero of Charity, but lending money to two of the biggest debt kings...
    • Unlike Oberon, we do know why Izo put himself in debt; his claim that he has not one coin to pay for his debts is Exact Words as Jack the Ripper, Ibaraki Doji and Nine-Tattoo Dragon Eliza burst in, asking for pocket money. Izo promptly gives them what he has, resulting in a Flat "What" reaction from the Queen of Sheba.

Others

• The official manga anthology, Fate/Grand Order comic a la carte, features a treasure trove of these moments. One story features a play on EMIYA's Team Mom aspects where he knits belly bands and sweaters for Mash, Altera, Ushiwakamaru, Jack, and all the other servants with revealing clothes (both male and female) out of concern that they may catch a cold. Roman and Blackbeard were not amused.
• On April Fools' Day 2016, all the card art got changed to the Super-Deformed artstyle of the Learn to Play Manga! FGO webcomic. Including their website, which had fake news plastered all over it, with one headline dramatically announcing that Nasu was too busy playing Dark Souls III to give a shit about anything.
  • Of particular note is the April Fools card art of Solomon, which is him getting strangled by the female protagonist. The female protagonist is stronger than the final boss...
  • Nursery Rhyme reading an H-doujin of female protag/Mash while blushing heavily.
  • All big-breasted Servants are drawn flat except Drake and Anne Bonny.
  • The Altria clones all have the same pose and expression including Mordred and Mysterious Heroine X.
  • Orion switches place with Artemis.
  • Gilgamesh's artillery armor and the shit-eating grin he's wearing along with it.
  • Nobunaga is naked, just like in her final ascension, Koha-ace style.
  • Jekyll has his pants down for seemingly no reason.^note It's a quirk of his character design. Jekyll's pants are way too large for him and constantly unbuttoned, because in Fragments of Sky Silver Hyde was a giant werewolf-like creature and that was the best way to keep his dignity after transforming. Hyde in Grand Order isn't a monster anymore, but the pants remain and now do nothing except look silly.
  • Mordred's helmet has a smiley face. Lancelot's helmet has 2 small holes for eyes. Darius' has 2 candles as his headlight.
  • Arash shows up as a ghost.
  • Tamamo Cat's crazed expression, fitting of an actual Berserker.
  • Paracelsus, Arjuna, and Karna have extremely lanky proportions, being extremely tall and extremely thin.
  • Martha is stomping the ground with her foot, looking agitated like being unable to keep up the holy woman charade anymore.
• Then there's April Fools 2017. They released an AR app only playable for that day, FGO GO, short for Fate/Grand Order Gutentag Omen. Gameplay consists of just throwing infinite Quartz until a Servant is caught. And Riyo has once again drawn all Servants in his chibi artstyle.
  • Riyo's 3 original Servants also show up for this game. They're all made from udon dough. And Olga Marie's Servant is humiliating her.
  • Merlin's has Fou kick him in the face.
  • Caster Gilgamesh is him being chased by Siduri to do paperwork, with the flavor text making fun of how he died of overwork in Babylon.
  • Raikou's holding a Kintoki doll incredibly close to her chest with a sleep-deprived look.
  • The Lobo half of Hessian Lobo/Avenger of Shinjuku tries to look fierce but instead looks very cute.
  • Mysterious Heroine X Alter's wearing spiral glasses, still with the same pose as all Altria Clones.
  • Speaking of Altria clones, her swimsuit version has the same pose too, but she faces backwards.
  • Rider Kintoki's almost the same, except his gigantic chest burst through his tight biker suit while he's giving you a thumbs up.
  • Quetzalcoatl looks like she's about to land a splash on someone with a crazed expression.
  • Bedivere has a blank stare similar to all other Altria clones, and his metal hand has become gigantic, ready to punch you.
  • Enkidu's taking off their clothes with the flavor text lampshading their Ambiguous Gender.
  • Arthur's not wearing any pants for some reason. And yes, he still has the same blank face and pose of the Altria clones.
  • EMIYA Alter's squatting with his head turned to the audience, parodying his real card to a T.
  • Rider Mordred's shows Prydwen as a kickboard.
• April Fools 2018 had a rerun of FGO GO, but also featured some new cards.
  • Altera Santa adds a moustache on her face.
  • Rider of Resistance/Christopher Columbus has a super-wide Slasher Smile that goes past terrifying into bloody-hilarious, complete with shining eyes.
  • Berserker of El Dorado/Penthesilea is probably the angriest one that Riyo has drawn, what with fire in her bloodshot eyes and her twin weapons having smiley faces drawn on them.
  • Katsushika Hokusai gets ink squirted in her eyes by her octopus-father.
  • Mecha Eli-chan sports a goofy cartoon-dinosaur-esque maw, while Mk II now has a stoic Super Robot face on her usual body.
  • Caster of Midrash/Queen of Sheba has her eyes turned into yen symbols, portraying her as a Gold Digger.
  • Abigail Williams has her tentacles out while there's a bandage on her forehead where her Third Eye is... and Lavinia is caught in one of her tentacles.
  • Caster of Okeanos/Circe rides around on a piglet.
  • Tiamat is crying as she's being molested by pale, naked Riyo Gudakos coming out of the Sea of Life. Not even the Mother of All Life is safe from her lust.
  • Nobunaga (Swimsuit) is doing an epic riff on her electric guitar... only that she's naked save for her hat just like her Archer form.
  • Goetia is a giant robot being controlled by Riyo Gudako.
  • Osakabehime, being the Hikikomori she is, puts herself in a cardboard box sponsored by amazones.com.
  • Ereshkigal swapped places with Ishtar who shrank and is hanging under her spear.
  • Asagami Fujino is staring into nothingness and looks sick.
• In Type-Moon ACE vol. 11, there was an interview with Nasu Kinoko, a gold mine for funny quotes.
  • Regarding "Fate/Accel Zero Order", Nasu mentioned Urobuchi's first draft for the event story was Darker and Edgier than Fate/Zero and immediately rejected.
    Nasu: Write something with a happy ending for once.
    Urobuchi: Can’t I have this character kill this other character and end it there?
    Nasu: What kind of festival do you think we’re making here?! Gen, you should believe more in dreams, aspirations, and the bonds between people!
  • The entire event was designed so Urobuchi can easily blaze through it with his 3* party. But if it gets too difficult for him, he'll cheat with his Kintoki.
  • The magazine also has some of the Type-Moon members talk about Servants they like. For Takeshi Takeuchi, there's Kintoki and Void Shiki. He doesn't have any of the Saber-faces yet. Nasu calls Medea Lily a Psycholily and another staff member earnestly begs for Delight Works to buff Ushiwakamaru.
  • Everyone in Type-Moon likes Kintoki for his "cheating" capabilities.
• The Fate/Zero collab livestream:
  • Nobunaga cosplaying as schoolboy Arjuna from Jeanne Alter's delusion from the Da Vinci event.
  • Ayako Kawasumi said the term Saber-face for the first time and then said that there were still more Saber-faces to come. God help us all.
  • Nobunaga panicking after Kawasumi said that she likes Edmond Dantes. And then he starts fanboying over everything as usual, pulling off silly poses and gushing about Kohaku. The others decided that next time, he would be the livestream filler.
• A meta example. An early Comptiq magazine reveals the rarity of the new Knights of the Round Table that will appear in the Camelot chapter. Gawain is listed as a R with 3 stars below to cement his status. Fan outcry ensued since Gawain was one of the stronger Servants in Fate/Extra. Two days later, a tweet from the Comptiq said that there was a typo in the issue and Gawain was a 4*/SR. If it was a character typo, we can understand, but a 3-star image typo...?
• FGO 1st Anniversary livestream is full of Nobunaga and Mafia's usual shenanigans. Highlights include: Mafia's Presence Concealment skill (because he's wearing a green shirt in front of a green screen) and using Rule Breaker to cheat at the roulette (after that, he licks it), Nobunaga almost OHKO'ed by Risa Taneda's roleplay as Mash, and finally everyone going crazy after the announcement that summoning now only uses 3 quartz for one roll and 30 for one ten-roll. Forever. Also there was a letter from Nasu.
  Nasu: NO Tsukihime for now.
• The Fall 2016 Machi Asobi talk revealed some funny tidbits about Ayako Kawasumi and Rumi Ōkubo's experience with the game and some amusing behind-the-scenes stuff from DW.
  • Kawasumi had such a difficult time with Ibaraki's raid, she had to ask Kana Ueda to help her beat it.
  • Ookubo didn't understand how the first Halloween event worked so she didn't get much out of it. Kawasumi notes that she didn't get Halloween Bathory either.
  • Neither of them could clear any of the Nero Festival 2016 Exhibition Matches and gave up after their first attempt at trying to beat Heracles.
  • Ookubo wants to know why Bathory doesn't have a swimsuit version. She speculates it's the flat chest. Her most wanted Servant was Gilgamesh but after talking to Kawasumi who was really nice, she's now considering Altria as her most wanted Servant.
  • Kawasumi only whales for Altria and the only one she doesn't have is the swimsuit version. In addition, she keeps asking Nasu and Takeuchi to create a new Altria for all Classes because she's ready to voice an Altria for every class. Dammit Kawasumi.
  • With the exception of Altria, Scathach and Anne & Mary, every other swimsuit Servant was based on the production crew's fetish.
  • Xuanzang was supposed to only have a trial quest but Nasu fell in love with her artwork and insisted that he'd write an event for her.
  • Nasu kept pushing fist-fighting Martha onto the staff and that's why we got Ruler Martha because he wanted at least one version of Martha that used fisticuffs.
  • Honjou Raita suddenly came up with Rider Kintoki's artwork one day because he'd thought a motorcycle riding Kintoki would look cool and submitted it to the company. While they were unsure what to do, one of the writers fell in love with the art and came up with the Onigashima event for Kintoki.
  • Babylon came in a 1000 page pdf for the director and he's still stuck halfway through reading it and is considering giving up.
  • The Fate/Zero event and its multiple maintenances had traumatized the staff so badly they started the Rashoumon event in the morning to avoid another mess.
• The Babylonia livestream. Nobunaga is the best.
  • To start it all off, Santa Kamen Nobu! Then he starts talking about Extella excitedly with Kawasumi, citing the game's great story and about finding a new waifu (it's Tamamo). The other two hosts are confused.
  • After giving information on the Babylonia chapter, Nobu is suddenly wearing a... horrifying "Tonakai-san" costume. With Santa Kamen's mask.
  • Takahashi becomes very tempted to use her monthly rent money on the gacha for Babylonia, with Ookubo encouraging it. Shimazaki tries to put his foot down and avoid her going that down that path.
  • But the main highlight of this livestream is Nobunaga's birthday surprise: a cake with a shirtless Arjuna illustration by Pako... with strawberries as his nipples. Best. Cake. Ever. Then Kawasumi slices it. With Excalibur, of course.
  • When doing their usual game for how much quartz the viewers (and by extension Nobunaga and Kawasumi) get, they attempt to cheat and rig the game so they get the most quartz possible... only to find out that Delight Works had anticipated this and rigged the cards against them with all the cards being 1s. Then the spirit of Mafia gives them advice, letting them use the Mafia card to cheat their way to victory with Nobunaga using his "Eye of the Mind" skill to get the right card.
• When the developers were asked about the lack of swimsuit-clad male Servants for the Summer event, they replied that most male Servants end up half-naked anyway, so they didn't see a point in going any further.
• First Order OVA:
  • Among the people Medusa Alter petrified, she caresses and then gorily decapitates one particular statue that looks a lot like Shinji. To the uninitiated, this would be Nightmare Fuel, but to the veterans of the Fate franchise this is the most delicious Black Comedy.
  • Cu Chulainn hitting on Mash, leading to Ritsuka irritably shoving him away.
  • For another meta-funny, fans were quite amazed at Cu Chulainn's performance in the OVA as Caster. After defeating Saber, he asks the protagonist to summon him as Lancer next time, because he feels that he performs best at that class, and being summoned as Caster limited him so much. The reason this is funny is because most fans — especially those who have already watched Carnival Phantasm — know that he (almost) always dies horribly when summoned as Lancer.
  • Near the end Ritsuka and Mash share a very heartfelt, very intimate hug... only for the camera to pan back and show Dr. Roman sitting right there in plain view.
• The Fate Project 2017 stream had several hilarious segments featuring the Koha-ace crew. Highlights from the 2016 farewell short:
  • Okita and Nobunaga griping about how F/GO is still ongoing not knowing that the "camera" is turned on. When they realize what's going on, Nobunaga does a complete 180 and praising things about the 'anime' (also namedropping the hit anime "Washi no Na wa"/"My Name") and the game, while Okita reprimands her that it's not going to work... only to suggest the higher ups fire the 'underhanded' Nobu and continue to support her. Cue a brawl between the two.
  • When a fan (most likely real-life since it's a stream) asks why are they watching Ritsuka and where is the female protagonist, Nobunaga only has this to say:
    Nobunaga: BECAUSE WE ARE A BORED BUNCH WITH NOTHING BETTER TO DO!
  • Medusa is overjoyed for Sakura since her route has finally been adapted and there's more news on it, with a banner hanging over them reading "Sakura's Great Victory". Okita (Sakura Saber) assumes this must mean she's getting an anime, only for Rider to punch her. ^note If you don't get the joke, the last three words on the banner when translated practically becomes a modification of the last three words of Okita's Catchphrase "Okita-san, daishouri!! (Big/Great victory)".
  • Then a trailer for a Fate/Koha ace anime appears in the next segment, only for Medusa to push it to the side, explaining that this is not actually going to happen. The trailer narrator and then Nobu and Okita respond with a long, drawn out 'ehhhhhhhhhhhhh?' Also, when you pause at the right moment, Nobunaga's eyes resemble her Koha-ace version before being pushed out of the screen. This goes into Hilarious in Hindsight because come the end of 2019, Type-MOON DID announce a more serious adaptation of the aforementioned 'anime'... in manga form: Fate/type Redline.
  • When Nobunaga sees Nero, she recognizes that face and realizes that this could only be... Altria-senpai. And she's confused at the boobs, the pads and the class change. This earns Nobunaga another punch to the face.
  • Nero tries to claim that she's now the most popular Saber and that the era of red dominating over blue has come. Altria just ignores her and asks for another bowl to eat. Nero is completely taken back by how Altria sidelined her. Then when Altria is boasting about all her Saber-face counterparts, they appear in cut-ins while Mysterious Heroine X appears as a tiny mention in the corner. Nero then proceeds to complain about why she didn't get a swimsuit counterpart, to which Medusa says that might be a little overboard. (Funnily enough, Nero would indeed get a swimsuit alt later on, during the Dead Heat Summer Race event.)
  • During the concluding segment, Okita demonstrates her "Year-Crossing Three-Stage Thrust"... i.e., running Nobu through with her katana. Without missing a beat, Nobu removes the sword before stating that now that the show is over, she's heading back to the temple to sleep. Okita stops her by invoking the Credits Running Sequence as a must-do. Nobunaga is understandably confused at first, then decides to just play along while the rest of the cast follows suit.
    • Also before they start running, Medusa states "Not this again". The letter Okita reads is obviously from Kohaku of Tsukihime, who made them do the same thing in the Koha-Ace Segment for Carnival Phantasm. Nero and Altria were both involved in that one too.
    • Before the Credits Running Sequence starts, Okita says that she will be the fastest due to her Shukuchi... only to spontaneously cough up blood on the first step and lose consciousness as a reference to her tuberculosis in Real Life.
      Medusa: SHE'S DOWN!!!
  • The credits themselves end with the five running away from a gigantic Gudako, with Altria asking for another bowl of noodles to eat while they're being chased. They don't even run for real until they notice the female protagonist's shadow looming over them.
  • Almost everything that comes out of Altria's mouth is either just her asking for more food or slurping noodles. Nobunaga wonders if eating is the only thing she does.
• The Fate/GUDAGUDA Order Drama CD is a 9-part special that is utterly ridiculous from beginning to end.
  • Part 1:
    • Medusa saying that she was tricked into performing in the Drama CD by a letter saying that she will be doing a Koha-Ace Drama CD.
    • Altria waltzing in and starting with a slightly altered version of her NP chant:
      Saber: Now is the time to release it! Saber class-no-FGO's greatest AOE Buster Noble Phantasm. Plus Mana Burst and plus Charisma! Ex-CALIBUR!!!
    • Rider saying that the reason why they didn't use the video clip to dub over it and used a slideshow is because it's a Drama CD.
    • The whole reason Saber did this? It's to confirm the myth that "Saber that can't shoot beams aren't Sabers!" and new candidates for the Saber class must have Sword Beam as a mandatory trait. Okita immediately counters that she got in and didn't need such a gimmick and the main trait they should be looking for is excellent stats. Cue Nobunaga saying this:
      Nobunaga: But you have shit stats, don't you? ^note Okita's Weak Constitution skill, which is derived from her tuberculosis, reduced her stats to C and below, excluding Agility which is A+, meaning that she can't last long enough in any standard Holy Grail War, turning her into a Joke Character lore-wise.
    • To prove the theory, Medusa decides to go around asking other Sabers... which turn out to be practically a Kangaroo Court of Saber-faces (Saber Lily, Saber Alter and Mysterious Heroine X), much to Okita's chagrin. When they're going to interview a red Saber, Okita thinks it's Nero (Red Saber) only to find out that it's Mordred (Saber of Red). Mordred's answer also deserves a spot. Sure, she can shoot beams from her sword because her father can too... but...
      Mordred: But I didn't hear anything about a blast from your spear, FAAAAATTTHHHEEEERRRR!!!!!
    • The other Sabers couldn't make it due to budget overload, so they just wrote in with letters.
      Siegfried: Sorry, I'm a Saber that can shoot beams, sorry.
      Atilla: Beams are good civilization.
    • Okita is understandably upset that the reports are very one-sided and demands for Nero and Caesar to be interviewed. She is ignored and Altria proudly states that all future Saber candidates must shoot beams and include their beam colour in their resume.
  • Part 2:
    • The second guest is brought in and it's Mordred. When Okita asks whether she is the son of King Arthur or something like that, the latter starts to go ballistic and promptly deflates when seeing Altria in the same room eating a watermelon. Mordred immediately starts to collect herself on what to say to her father only to be treated like a fellow knight of the Round Table rather than a son.
      Mordred: (I got treated like a stranger?!)
    • The reason Mordred is here is to prove that she deserves to be the king of Britain. Altria's response? Host an interview with her as the reportee. Mordred immediately crumbles upon realizing that her father has a show and thinks that she should have asked Agravain to record it, only to second-guess when she realised that he would ask her for money. The interviewees? A Kangaroo Court of Saber-faces (again). Saber Alter says that Mordred being king of Britain is the equivalent of getting a Triceratops to do farm work. Mysterious Heroine X still hates all Sabers equally. But when it comes to Saber Lily, she states that as long as the person works hard she can be a good king. Mordred is caught so completely by surprise by Lily's cuteness that she collapses and has to be lugged away by Bedivere. Finally, she proceeds to have rambling thoughts about how Saber Lily is an angel, forgetting that since this is a Drama CD, all of her thoughts are said out loud.
  • Part 3: The next question is the myth "Archers who use bows aren't Archers" because of the Loophole Abuse by Gilgamesh and EMIYA in F/SN...only to find out that all the Archers are busy in F/GO and can't come. Mordred wonders why did this turn into a F/GO ad.
  • Part 4:
    • Mordred has spent all of her time playing F/GO getting all the schedules for the Saber EXP training and material days, but had no luck getting her father in the Gacha. She only has Saber Lily who is a free servant and was given the nickname "Angel Saber" by Mordred.
    • The question in this part? When is the right time to roll in the Gacha for SSRs? Superstitions include stripping naked in the middle of the night and yelling loud enough to wake up your neighbours will make a SSR will appear. Of course Mordred wants to try out the techniques but Medusa immediately gets Okita to speak of the catalyst meme. Mordred's list of catalysts?
      Mordred: The clear file of Father that I bought from an Anime shop. The Blu-ray of Father's anime. Father's... really awesome figurine. By the way, the special ending of Unlimited Blade Works is grea-
      Altria: Honestly, you are creeping me out.
    • With all the catalysts assembled, Mordred proceeds to yell out "FATHER!" and proceeds to roll for Altria. She complains that Lancelot already has Altria at NP 5, meaning that he pulled her 5 times in the Gacha. The Gacha proceeds to turn to 3 lines, and then Medusa proceeds to say that 3 lines in the Gacha means a servant is coming and lampshades that they actually said something useful for the game. When the servant card reveals itself to be a Gold Saber (meaning 4* or 5* Saber Servant):
      Mordred: UWAAAAAAAH!!!
    • After getting that, she immediately backpedals thinking that she is getting Sumanai aka Siegfried.
    • When the card is revealed to be Mordred since her very own existence is a catalyst by itself:
      Mordred: IT'S ME?! (proceeds to lament about her allowance for the month)
    • Meta Fridge Brilliance. Why Lancelot got Altria 5 times while Mordred couldn't get a single Altria? Think back to how in lore, King Arthur spared Lancelot despite his affair with Guinevere while Mordred got punished for a lesser crime which lead to the Battle of Camlann. Their luck with the Gacha is mirroring their relationship with King Arthur.
  • Part 5:
    • Saber Alter barges in, stating that she is the better servant. The two Altrias start bickering about who is better with Saber Alter saying that because she is 4* she is easier to get. In actual gameplay, Saber Alter actually has a better NP multiplier (450% at lvl 1) not to mention when Grail Ascended to lvl 100, she actually has better stats then her vanilla counterpart.
  • Part 6:
    • This part's question? Whether a Saber without an ahoge is a Saber or not. Mordred's response?
      Mordred: EEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!???????? (She does not have an ahoge)
    • Mordred is still gushing over Saber Lily's overall niceness when she apologizes for having an ahoge. When she realizes that Saber Alter doesn't have an ahoge, she wonders if Saber Alter is her real father. Cue Saber Alter immediately saying no.
    • Okita even states that she has an ahoge... it counts even if it's smaller! Mordred laments that she lost to a comedic-spinoff character.
    • Saber Alter states that she will not be trivialised by such a mundane question and states that the real requirement to be a real Saber... is to be designed by Takeuchi (Type-Moon Head Artist and world-renowned Saber enthusiast). Mordred realizes just how screwed she is, since her main designer is not him (It's the artist who illustrated Fate/Apocrypha, Konoe Ototsugu).^note Though her very first designer was Takeuchi.
      Mordred: EEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!????????
    • Saber Lily decides to comfort Mordred since it's kind of her thing. Mordred can't help but wonder how a person like her turned into Blue Saber (Altria). Altria tells Mordred to shut up or she will Calibur her.
    • Finally, due to the high number of Saber-faces, Mysterious Heroine X barges in to kill them all.
  • Part 7:
    • Heroine X is pissed at the huge number of Sabers saturating the already overloaded gacha and declares that there will be no more new Saber Servants added. She then proceeds to attack all the other Saber-faces at once. Meanwhile, Medusa is worried about Altria's VA getting tired since she is playing 4 characters (Blue, Alter, Lily, Mysterious Heroine X) at once. Mysterious Heroine X proceeds to say out her new attack that she created just for this occasion.
      Mysterious Heroine X: First step, Takeuchi. Second step, Kinoko. Third step, Saber! Unlimited Saber Thrusts!!
      Okita: Isn't that my trademark!!
    • Mordred asking Lily to get behind her to protect her from all this carnage. Mordred proceeds to turn Tsundere from all of Lily's compliments.
  • Part 8:
    • Evil!Nobunaga is revealed to be the mastermind of the whole fight, hoping to get all the Sabers to wipe each other out. This is to lower the number of 4* and 5* in the gacha so that players will be able to roll her. She doesn't know that her 4* status is from being a prize Servant who is not in the gacha pool at all.
    • In hindsight, Evil!Nobunaga should have done her monologue out of earshot, since all the Saber-faces stopped fighting when they heard her plan. They now all have one goal, Evil!Nobunaga's utter annihilation.
      Saber: This devious plan. I cannot let you go because you are Koha-Ace. Let's go, us and the extra!
      Mordred: Eh? I'm the extra?
      Saber Alter: I have no objections with starting with this one.
      Okita: Well, I suspected it would come down to this.
      Saber Lily: Sorry, Nobu-san. That things have come to this...
      Mysterious Heroine X: Burnt or Exploded. Which one is more fitting for you?
    • Good!Nobunaga appears saying that she was in the ladies' room, pretty much destroying any hope of survival for Evil!Nobunaga when she tried to pass of the whole thing as a joke. Cue all the Sabers unleashing their Noble Phantasms at her.
    • Mordred's reaction to the whole mess?
      Mordred: What the hell?
  • Part 9: When Nobunaga thanks the cast, the Saber-faces minus Okita say that they are very tired due to Ayako Kawasumi voicing multiple characters at the same time. And at the very end of the segment, Okita wonders if Medusa's sisters could make an appearance next time. Medusa's response?

    Medusa: I kindly decline.

• Nobunaga Shimazaki strikes again with his fanboyism. When he went to an event that gives an extra copy of a light novel for someone that comes with their mother, he showed Raikou instead. The confused store clerk asks his friend for an explanation (Raikou is a yandere mother). In the end, Nobu got his extra copy.
• AnimeJapan 2017:
  • Jun'ichi Suwabe appears and introduces himself with his back turned to the audience:
    "I'm Bob Emiya."
  • Then when he's asked how he feels about playing Siegfried for the Apocrypha anime:
    "Sumanai."
  • Nobunaga wanted to fanboy all over the announcements but he ran out of time.
• Fate/Extra CCC stream:
  • Nobunaga's cosplaying as Dantes from the White Day CE, he even brought a pipe to emphasize his points.
  • When Noriko Shitaya does a few voiced lines, calling the audience members senpai and all that, the camera zooms on Mafia. Who's licking his lips. Eep.
  • Meanwhile Shimazaki is either cringing or closing his eyes and indulging in his fantasies of Passionlip and BB actually saying those lines to him.
• The Chaldea Ace creator interview has lots of little laughs.
  • Nasu was planning to only write the Moon Festival event when Takeuchi dropped Santa Alter in his lap, pressuring him to write more events.
    Nasu: "… Still, one day, a man named Takeuchi went and drew an Altria meant for Christmas all on his own whims, and even said 'Let her be the heroine!', so if it came down to that I had no choice but to write, didn’t I?"
    Takeuchi: "That was a pretty tough period~"
    Nasu: "Whose fault do you think that was…"
  • Shimazaki, Nasu, and Takeuchi are amused at Jason's inexplicable popularity.
    Takeuchi: "The useless guy is unexpectedly popular. Why is it that he’s so useless but yet still so likable?"
  • pako suddenly made Edison a lion man on a whim. Nasu and Higashide just shrugged and went along with it.
    Nasu: "Were you the one who turned Edison into a lion?”
    Higashide: "I didn’t do anything like that!? Probably pako did it…"
    Nasu: "Is that so! But since it’s interesting, sorry, please officially make it come alive as part of the script!"
    Higashide: "I got it!"
  • The only reason the Tiamat battle is as long as it is because Nasu was watching Shin Godzilla and decided to homage it.
  • Nobu talks about his reaction to the Demon Pillar battle.
    "The battle with the demon pillars was quite surprising. Defeating the Demon Pillars actually trended on Twitter. But in truth, “let me see the ending quickly” and “more mats please”, these two desires were really conflicting."
• Agartha livestream:
  • Nobu's cosplaying as the male protagonist from the "Gudaguda Meiji Revival" 4* CE and imitates Oda Nobuyuki.
  • Satoshi Tsuruoka read some lines as Gilles, with the scenarios being "Gilles as a waiter in a family restaurant", "Gilles as a gentle big brother", and "Gilles as kindergarten babysitter". Tsuruoka went with the first option, with Gilles meeting Saber Alter in the restaurant who wants a hamburger. She's insulted by him calling her an unsexy Jeanne and blasts him with Excalibur Morgan, which is represented by Kawasumi interrupting and yelling that out loud. Also Tsuruoka peppers his lines with "COOL!"
  • After the Apocrypha PV ends, Tsuruoka gets into character as Spartacus and shouts "Death to the oppressors!!"
  • The developers promote the two upcoming F/GO manga adaptations, both of which star the male protagonist. They ask if there's one featuring the female protagonist, with a Smash Cut to the upcoming published edition of Riyo's comics. Everyone then bursts out in laughter.
• FGO 2nd Anniversary Festival:
  • The trailer for Riyo's manga has the usual narration of saving the earth before the cast bursts in and it switches from the solemn main theme to a more light-hearted theme (from Summer 2016). Mash goes around trying to tell everyone about the new release, with the female protagonist ignoring her in favor of the book she's reading, Saber solely focused on eating, and Jeanne too busy fending off Exp hands in the archive to care about it. At the end of the PV, Mash gets her spirits back up to tell everyone about the new manga, oblivious to the female protagonist sneaking up on her...
  • Joji Nakata beckons the Chaldea masters to come over during the Heaven's Feel stage show... and of course after that, he says this.
    "Rejoice, young man... oh, I mean, young men and girls."
  • 2nd Anniversary livestream:
    • Nobunaga once again cosplays as Arjuna, wearing the Anniversary Formal Wear with the new addition of dark sunglasses. He gives a shout out to Pako, Arjuna's character designer, for this awesome idea. Same with Takahashi cosplaying Mash with her Anniversary Formal Wear. Meanwhile Minami has homemade Nitocris ears.
    • Ayako Kawasumi is lightly annoyed at Takeuchi for creating yet another version of Altria just when she completed her Altria collection.
    • Takahashi and Minami roleplay as Mash and Nitocris with them trying to get Nitocris' senpai (Ozymandias) from the gacha, but instead get the gloriously hammy laugh of Dantes, provided by Nobu.
      Ahahahaha! You called me!!
    • Everyone there hates Gawain's boss fight in Camelot and the mere mention of him makes them shudder.
    • Mafia's Rule Breaker makes its triumphant return to give everyone 30 Quartz to make a ten-roll.
• In the New Years 2018 stream, they aired a 3-part animated crossover with Fate/school life manga.
  • The first part begins with the male protagonist (Voiced by Nobunaga Shimazaki) asking Mash what he wants to do now that he's hyped up, with Mash thinking he wants to do something romantic with a backdrop of Learning With Manga's Gudako laying on the bed. What he really wants to do is Saint Quartz summon to Mash's shock (and a very hilarious, long-winded yell of "GAAAAACHAAAAAA~"), causing wind to blow the backdrop and the dialogue box away, hitting the protagonist on the head.
  • Protagonist explaining the reasons he should summon right now which Mash thinks are pure urban myths. To their mutual surprise, the protagonist managed to summon a Gold Assassin in a single summon in the form of Pseudo-Servant Kaede Makidera in the role of Takuboku Ishikawa.
  • Not being sure how good Kaede is as a Servant, the protagonist and Mash set up a battle against a bunch of Hands to show what she can do before being shocked that her main power is a Touch of Death that makes the enemy explode and disintegrate. And her Noble Phantasm? Bowing before her enemy before they blow up in a stock explosion.
  • The second part begins with Kane Himuro floating in a void before encountering the physical manifestation of the World (as seen in the UBW anime) who summons her to the Throne of Heroes. That is, a play stage with an audience of Servants with the World now being a cardboard image of itself.
  • After being explained the concept of Pseudo-Servants, Himuro tries to imagine what kind of figures she would represent before the World gives her three options: Taro and Jiro, Laika Dog or New Nessi. She's understandably annoyed that she is suggested being a Pseudo-Servant to a bunch of dogs.
    Himuro: Taro and Jiro's survival ability seems pretty high so it's still fine, but Laika Dog is that one who flew to the outer space, isn't it!?
    World: Skill: Pioneer of the Stars - EX!
    Himuko: He can't return to Earth, though!
  • The World then presents Himuko with a figure from Chūshingura. After getting the figure wrong, the World tells her that her option is Kajikawa Yosobe, to which Himuko throws a temper tantrum. The World then gives her the last person remaining: Amelia Jenks Bloomer (as in, the namesake to bloomers), much to both the protagonist's surprise at summoning another gold Servant and confusion about what is she even going to fight against with bloomers.
  • The third part is a short depicting a Holy Grail War fought by the cast of Fate/school life, using Servants from the Strongest Servant contest. It's as awesome as it is funny seeing some of the Servant entries in the contest in action. As it turns out, the whole thing was just a story/fake preview by Yukika Saegusa as Friedrich Nietzsche, during which the protagonist has almost died due of blood loss caused by his gacha luck.
• In 2018, for April's Fools, the NA team decided to hold an event in Sakuracon... only for Riyo Gudako to conduct a Hostile Show Takeover on their Twitter account, 'killing' and tying up and gagging several visiting publishers. When April's Fools ended, Riyo Gudako was mentioned to be 'apprehended and screaming "You haven't seen the last of me!" as she Rayshifted away'. Do note that by this point, All the Statesmen hasn't happened in NA yet, therefore, she's technically right...
• The live stream for the third anniversary had a lot of announcements and surprises that excited many fans, however one moment stole the whole show.. when the Riyo Gudako mascot suddenly showed up near the end with a Rule Breaker and multiplied the reward quartz for the live stream five times. Even better? Rule Breaker was literally taped onto her arm.
• During the Lostbelt #3 livestream, Aoi Yūki immediately loses her shit when we discover who wrote the Lostbelt, supported by Ayako Kawasumi. Not that we don't know why.
  Nobunaga Shimazaki: We have a Victim Group here!
• In the FGO 4th Anniversary live event, upon her introduction as a guest, Aoi Yūki entered with this gem...
  Aoi Yuuki (in Okita's voice): MASTER!! WHY THE HECK IT'S MUSASHI WHO GETS A SWIMSUIT?!!
  • This gets more hilarious when shortly after this, the CM of the Summer event was revealed and Okita finally got her swimsuit variant!
  • Triple hilarious when Aoi, in one segment of Chaldea Radio, reveals that she had recorded Summer Okita's lines before the third summer event. Cue her confusion when Okita didn't appear in that event, more so when she saw the preview for the fourth and still no sight of Okita; she thought Okita got scrapped somewhere along the line.
• The October 26 2019 stream revealed the Saber Wars II event by declaring that "Halloween has been left behind in the Heisei era" in a Star Wars-esque opening narration.
• The reason why the Star-Crossed Lovers Rama and Sita look alike is because their artist, Rin Kususaga, misinterpreted them.
  Rin Kususaga: This young woman wears almost no clothes! Please report it! Still, the concept of Sita was a maiden with pigtails, but in the beginning, I misunderstood it as "Rama becomes this young woman by transforming" as the concept (what are you saying)! Because of the misunderstanding, I thought… "Changing into those clothes and underwear whenever he transforms… Totally a pervert…" I was relieved that he is a different person altogether. I think that personally, because of this super satisfying design, for another ten years I cannot draw any more of these characters! … It is called something like, being likely that I cannot continue my work for the next ten years (shudder).
• The trailer for Fate/Requiem's crossover has EMIYA (Alter) dancing in the background.
• The 5th anniversary "Under the Same Sky" campaign showcases most Servants checking out all the wonders of Japan by travelling to new places or Japanese Servants going back to nostalgic places from long ago to look back fondly on. However, Osakabehime's location is... a few feet outside her home of Himeji Castle. Yes, that's right, she still somehow managed to retain some of that Hikikomori spirit in the campaign about travelling around Japan.
  Osakabehime: Even going outside can be fun sometimes. I mean, as long as Ma-chan is with me!
• The 5th anniversary commemoration PV showcases Servants and Masters enjoying a grand festival, at one point including Karna popping a bottle of champagne. The video then cuts to a dripping wet Arjuna... having been sprayed by the champagne.
• Joji Nakata (the voice of Kirei) discovering the fast-forward button and tweeting it out as a pro-tip in case this feature wasn't widely known, only to be embarrassed upon learning it was quite the contrary.
  I thought if I said this, at least a half of people would be happy to say, "Well, I didn't know that, thank you Joji," but only a few, including myself, didn't know... lol.
  Give me back my time.
• Nobunaga Shimazaki strikes again in the Anime Japan 2021 livestream. This time he made a not-so-subtle reference to the game Granblue Fantasy under the name "Granval Fantasy", with him trying to denying that he didn't take the name from some kind of franchise and his idea was original, all the while the entire chat and the VAs were hilariously calling him out on it.
  • Even funnier, several minutes after the livestream ended, he posted a picture with him apologizing for his joke without dropping the subtle references at all.
• On New Year's 2022, Nasu wrote a non-canon excerpt for an idea he had on his blog while watching TV. Referencing the yearly Hakone Ekiden^note Likely most familiar to non-Japanese players as the marathon pivotal to Run with the Wind, Morgan beckons Tam Lin Gawain (the other Tam Lin, Tristan and Lancelot, are not there because they're nursing a hangover and didn't feel like coming over this early in the morning respectively) to her castle and explains behind a veil she feels interested in holding a race for New Year celebrations. Gawain is accepting of this proposal and requests to start arrangements for a footrace. However, Morgan is more intrigued by using vehicles and lifts the veil to reveal that she's actually not sitting in her throne, but on a Molcar from Pui Pui Molcar she had her advisor create. The final exchange is what cinches it as hilarious.
  Morgan: (*smug*) This is the first automobile of the Faerie Kingdom — the Molcar.
  Tam Lin Gawain: Does Her Highness not intend to save the Faerie Kingdom—?!
• Meta example, but it seems someone couldn’t resist referencing a certain “Blue Eyes White Dragon.
• Nasu's explanation in a 2022 Famitsu interview of how Cernunnos ended up being the only god left in the sixth Lostbelt's history also reveals that Cernunnos makes puns using his own name.
  Nasu: Cernunnos said "I'm very concernnunos about this dangerous battle, so I'll retreat to Avalon" and took his priestess with him. Later he thought "It's been long enough. The Holy Sword must have already ended the battle. This can't continnunos forever.". So he came back and it was all destroyed. "We're donnunos for".
• Once again, Nobunaga Shimazaki shows up in cosplay for the FGO 7th Anniversary Livestream. Dream Portrait Arjuna Alter, to be precise, with help from his character designer pako, who proceeded to call him "Cosplay Uncle". Even better, pako proceeded to doodle Arjuna Alter in awe of Archetype: Earth/Arceuid's inclusion in the game to immortalize Shimazaki's fanboying of her, which became the latter's Twitter profile picture for a while.
• Toshiyuki Toyonaga's dorky entrance during the Lostbelt 6 Spotlight livestream: peeking out from behind the stage and using hand gestures to ask if it's time for him to come out. After getting the "ok" from Mafia Kajita he goes to his seat while excusing himself towards Haruki Ishiya and Kenji Akabane. After passing some tissues to Ayako Kawasumi (who cried during one of her narrations), he introduces himself as Merlin but is called out by Mafia almost immediately.

  Toyonaga: "Since I play Oberon, it's best not to believe what I say today since I might be lying."

• During the interview for the game's 8th anniversary, Nasu goes on record stating that Sodom's Beast/Draco is a special snowflake in that she's the only Beast from Proper Human History that can stay a Beast when summoned. The interviewer makes a cautious warning about how loaded that statement is... and Nasu responds by purposely drawing attention to the keyword. The man knows EXACTLY what he's doing...
• Both Hiroyama and CHOCO, the artists (and in the former's case, creator) of Chloe and Mélusine respectively, paraphrased their bewildered interactions with Nasu regarding their characters in the ServaFes 2023 event. For Hiroyama the request was to draw Avenger Chloe as a Kaiju, and for CHOCO the request for Ruler Mélusine was "take it as you like". The end result was Chloe turning Dangerous Beast into an Ascended Meme and Mélusine being armed with missiles and a gatling gun. Clearly the mushroom is Chaotic-aligned.
• More fun with Chloe and Hiroyama. Avenger Chloe is taking the role of a manga editor with an obsession with meeting deadlines... while Hiroyama has had a bad case of Schedule Slip for Chloe's own source manga. Not only did this get doubly ironic when Hiroyama had little time to play the FGO event featuring his own character due to said Slip, it got triply ironic when he first tried summoning her. In a classic example of the Monkey's Paw, he spent enough Saint Quartz to get SIX Berserker Altria Casters, but only ended up with ONE Avenger Chloe (and bare in mind that Chloe is the more common summon of the two). And when he did finally get her to NP5, it later turned out that August was the month where PRISMA☆ILLYA resumed a regular update schedule. Yes, Hiroyama was both punished AND rewarded by his own fictional character. It's just so ridiculous that you can't make it up.
• With the Christmas 2023 event announced, a preview of this year's Santa Servant was released, with the inevitable discussions on who it might be. A certain Servant has taken a crack at it by drawing his speculation: Santa Don Quixote. To be fair, the entry requirement this year was clearing Traum, which marked Don Quixote's debut.
  • Later a redraw was uploaded because Blanca thought it didn't really look like Don Quixote at all. The thought of Blanca of all people (or moths probably) being an art critic, and the fact that Oberon made Don Quixote taller before being corrected is hilarious in itself.

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