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A line have beened [sic] distorted by the Dark World.

The war came!
The republic encountered
Two squares fight the vehemence
The improbity fills the world
The space general of the alliance is skillful
Kidnap the D the speaker the conduct
The proper abruption alliance troops tries
Ratio prosperous drive with the

Star War the Third Gathers: The Backstroke of the West is a Gag Dub of Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith. It can be seen here.

The dub's script originated from a memetic Recursive Translation/Translation Train Wreck found in China by blogger Jeremy Winterson. The name is taken from the translation of the opening crawl, the original being, obviously, "Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith"; where the Chinese subtitles were then machine translated back into "Englsih". Most sentences are absolutely mangled in the translation, although some sentences still have their original meanings intact. It was later turned into a Gag Dub by the Youtube channel TheThirdGathers with clips posted beginning in 2010. In August 2021, director Timothy B Morgan began work on dubbing the only other known authentic full movie script, presumably found in China, Napoleon's Explosive (the mistranslation of Napoleon Dynamite), featuring some of the vocal actors who dubbed Backstroke of the West. This project was shelved when Backstroke of the West doubled its views on Gratefuldeadpool's upload of the full movie from 5 million to 10 million views in one year, with dozens of reaction videos. Morgan compiled and cut up these reaction videos into a 5 hour long supercut which follows the course of the movie, and at times contains uncanny moments of people asking the same questions or having similar reactions to a moment of the film. In the meantime, Reddit user "Koffikapp" stuck "gold" purchasing about 10 DVD's from China which contained full Chinglish subtitles of movies including 2 Harry Potter movies including the famous "Hally Porter" subtitles popularized years ago, Hannibal Lecter film The Red Dragon, Chicago, X-Men First Class, Phone Booth, Doubt, Tears of the Sun, and Star War Episope IV of which a few screencaps existed online and Morgan had hoped to persuade the Dub Gathers group to find in 2016, with no luck. Morgan, too long wanting to dub Hally Porter, shelved Napoleon Explosive and started casting and directing both. On February 28, 2024, The first scene of Hally Porter and the Door of the Room, Morgan's first movie since Backstroke of the West, was posted.

As of February 2024, the GratefulDeadpool upload has over 12 million views. In 2021, following a copyright takedown which has since been retracted, the entire video became archived.

Self-made Recursive Translations have been made of the other Star Wars movies in the series, collectively known as The Star War Gatherings, with a fandub of The Fourth Gathers: The Novelty Desirenote  and The Fifth Gathers: The Counterattack Collectionnote  both completed, clips and reaction videos of which can still be found. A new group of actors was cast for these movies, however a few Backstroke of the West actors, including Tom Schalk and Benjamin Pierce, did reprise their roles. Backstroke director Tim Morgan was involved only in assistance with casting and editing the scene where Ben returns as the West Emperor. These subtitles were created by Reddit users Knifeof Pi, Quirderph, and Rivercast. The dubs were directed by Quirderph, and are largely focused on Star Wars, employing a different, irreverent style. Morgan, having sat on the sidelines with no authentic bootlegs from China, is only now able to resume movie production.

    Dub Cast 
Tim Morgan:
Casting / Director / Editor / Producer

Tim Morgan:
Allah Gold/A Line/Liked To/The Peaceful Is Willing To/Reaching the West of Reaches/The Hero aka Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader (voice)
Viceroy Nute Gunray (voice)

Jeremy Evans:
The Ratio/Ratio Tile/Ratio The Tile/Section Ratio General/The Willing To Compares/The Willing to Compares Host/The Compares/The Willing to Compares The Master aka Obi Wan Kenobi (voice)

Kent Genis:
Section/The Gram/Republicans aka Clone Army (voice)

Tyler Mertes:
Space General/The General Space/Old Man aka General Grievous (voice)
Battle Droids (voice)

Blunt Rapture:
Captain Lushros Dofine (voice)
Lampay Fay (voice)

Ben Pierce:
The D/The Speaker/Speaker D/West Emporer/Host/The Friend/Prime Minister/The Pudding/The Governor of This City/The Member of Senate/Adult/The Country Of/Teacher/Master/The Emperor/Superior/D The Superior/Dark Lord/Dark Improbity/Big King aka Chancelor Palpatine/Darth Sideous (voice)

Dan Grimes:
The/Numerator the Threat aka Count Dooku (voice)

Kurt Yeager:
Text How Big Teachers aka Mace Windu (voice)

Zach Skoubis:
Blow the Skin aka C3PO (voice)

Zach Parker:
The Senator/Councilman aka Bail Organa (voice)
Captian Typho (voice)

Arielle Ceplina:
The Plum Of/The Gets the Rice aka Padme Amidala (voice)

Jen Wilcher:
Vanquish Is/Small Manakin aka Yoda (voice)

Dave Beifer:
Ki-Adi-Mundi (voice)
Mas Amedda (voice)

John Wilie:
Tion Medon (voice)

Ian Evans:
The Child aka Youngling (voice)

AJ Daughtry-Krill:
Captain aka Captain Jeremoch Colton (voice)
Captain aka Captain Raymus Antilies (voice)

Tom Schalk:
South Host aka Darth Vader (voice)

Note: Only tropes about this particular translation should be put here. Anything on the original film should go on the proper page.


List these tropeseses only:

  • Adaptational Nice Guy:
    • Speaker D. Revenge of the Sith heavily implies that Palpatine was the apprentice who murdered Darth Plagueis; here, Reach the Man was killed by his land, not by The D. It's also said that the war wasn't started by him, but by Allah Gold, meaning that The D might genuinely be a Well-Intentioned Extremist doing what he feels is necessary to end the conflict. It's still undeniable that he's not a good person: he causes the destruction of the Hopeless Situation Warriors, and he's every bit as ambitious and power-hungry as Palpatine, wanting to be aller strong and big than anyone.
    • Similar to Speaker D above, Space General is also somewhat nicer to his underlings in this version besides a one-off threat to feed them dog. When the Abruption Doctrine leaders question his ability to keep them safe, he begs them to believe him rather than threaten them as he did in the original work, and when it looks like Ratio and Gold will escape capture on his airship, he urges his troops to escape.
    • Vanquish Is is far more helpful to Gold than Yoda is to Anakin in Revenge of the Sith. Evidently, Allah Gold told Vanquish Is about The Plum Of's pregnancy, judging by his/her "Pregnancy? Pregnancy." line, meaning that either the Hopless Situation Parliament has no rules against marriage like the Jedi Council did, or Vanquish Is is Gold's Secret-Keeper. Vanquish Is' advice also seems much more helpful than the Jedi platitudes Yoda spouts in the equivalent scene in Revenge of the Sith.
  • Adaptational Villainy: The Republic as a whole. The fact that they now live in a galactic system called the Gram Republic implies the heroes are basically fighting for a narco-state.
  • Adaptational Wimp: Count Dooku gets downgraded from someone Anakin and Obi-Wan are no match for, to just a "Big" who is defeatable, going by Palpatine's dialogue. While supposedly less badass, instead of trying to get the duo to surrender their swords, he confidently goads them into pulling them out for battle and dedicating their bodies as if obsessed with lightsaber dueling and human sacrifices.
  • Added Alliterative Appeal: "The tile time transfers the troops."
  • Aerith and Bob: "Lemon Avenue" sounds kinda out of place on Coruscant.
  • Ambadassador: The Jedi were this in general, but Allah Gold in particular is mentioned as being involved with some sort of peace negotiation - presumably with the Abruption Doctrine - a few times throughout the movie.
  • Ambiguously Evil: The Hopeless Situation Parliament. Apparently, they have taught Allah Gold that the best way to end war is to have "less freedom with more wars", and Gold summarizes "the parliament plan" as doing exactly that. They also punish Gold for his relation to "long peace" by denying him a title, and apparently are using him to spy on Speaker D in order to find out about his sex life.
  • Ambiguous Syntax: Space General could either be threatening to feed his Mecha-Mooks dog meat or threatening to feed them to a dog depending on how one interprets that line.
  • Angrish:
    • Gold's reaction to not being granted a title by the Presbyterian Church is as incomprehensible as the rest of the script.
    "Can be how like this
    Like this too wide of the mark
    Like this inequity
    I can how belong to the
    parliament but is not"
    • Ratio Tile reacting to Allah Gold's killing of younglings:
    "This is what who fuck"
  • Arc Words: "Strong and big", "Good elephant", "On the hoof", and "Fuck". To a lesser extent, "What is the row", "Cut up rough", "Walk first one step" and "Do not want."
  • Artistic License – Biology:
    • If not referring to time or punctuation, Allah Gold mentioning Ratio Tile's periods is either this trope or stating that he is transgender.
    • Earlier on, Speaker D mentioned to Allah Gold that the public has an "eye ear," which apparently has a voice.
  • Artistic License – Military: When Speaker D appoints Allah Gold as a private, he phrases it as though it's a public office rather than a military rank. When the West Emperor contacts Commanding Officer, he calls him "Section commanding officer" although Commanding Officer appears to command a large army.
  • Ascended Meme: By accident. The translation unintentionally references the memetic nature of the "Unlimited power" line by having Speaker D Break the Fourth Wall and brag that he will "Get to say with you that part forever."
  • Ass Shove: One of the pilots says of a droid fighter, "He is in my behind."
  • Babies Make Everything Better: Allah Gold disagrees, saying he does not need his unborn child's help. He does consider the baby to be a blessing, but probably means that in a sentimental way.
  • Bad Boss: Zig-zagged with Space General. At one point, because of their failure to capture Ratio Tile and Allah Gold, he angrily exclaims "I should really feeds you all dog!" But later, after Gold and Tile defeat his bodyguards, Space General tells the same underlings "Leave he, run quickly!" while he confronts them on his own.
  • Badass Boast:
    • "You are a sacrifice article, that I cut up rough now," definitely counts.
    • One way to interpret The D's line "my power has always been to have no like," is that it's a very archaic way of saying that he has no equal e.g. "there are none like me", in which case, it's certainly badass.
  • Big "NO!": Subverted. It's rendered as "Not" and "Do not want", since Chinese doesn't have a word that specifically means 'no', instead it would be a negative term. In one case,* it becomes "Run", possibly because the translators thought he said "Go".
  • Blessed with Suck: Depending on the interpretation, The D's power "to have no like" may be regarded as this.
  • "Blind Idiot" Translation: People fluent in both languages have suggested that a recursive translation isn't enough to explain the trainwreck. They suspect that whoever translated the film into Chinese didn't have access to an actual script, as evidenced by some "translations" making sense only if you assume they misheard the original English, or they didn't pick up on it at all and made up a line they thought made sense in context. For example:
    • "Just as Count Dooku predicted" becomes "Kill these two republics bodyguard."
    • Yoda's line about "premonitions" became "Pregnancy? Pregnancy." The translator might not have known the word "premonition" or understood it to mean "pregnancy" - which makes sense, as The Plum Of's pregnancy is exactly what Allah Gold is worried about.
    • Senator's casual comment that Blow the Skin "is my wife" may come from the translator mishearing Bail Organa's original line, "Have the protocol droid's mind wiped", as "The protocol droid is my wife."
    • "Space General" seems to be a contextual name, deriving from the translator's not knowing or understanding the name "Grievous."
    • Luke Skywalker's name is rendered as "See Me", which may derive from the translator hearing "look" instead of "Luke."
    • The Sand People are referred to as "Pathetic People", which may derive from the translator hearing "sad people."
    • "The front is a lemon avenue flying straightly" was originally "Landing strip straight ahead", and it may be that the translator heard "landing strip" as "lemon street."
    • Allah Gold saying he was "made by the Presbyterian Church" may have been trying to say he was "mad" at them, but the line was mangled by a spelling and/or grammatical error.
  • Blind Obedience: Commanding Officer, and to an extent the other Republic Troopseses, to D The Superior upon being ordered by the latter to gun down the Hopeless Situation Warriors.
  • Blunt "Yes":
    • Assuming that "Is!" is an affirmative answer in this universe - see Catchphrase below, Ratio Tile agrees with Allah Gold that he has indeed underrated Gold's ability.
    • Also, Senator needs some serious lessons in tact: "Look, your loss very miserably heavy."
  • Bodyguard Betrayal:
    • Allah Gold is a bodyguard of the Republic, along with Ratio Tile. He assures It Gets the Rice that he can't rebel against the Republic, but then proceeds to do so, switching his loyalty to the Empire of the First Choice.
    • The Republic Troopseses as well, once the Hopeless Situation's time runs out, are ordered by D The Superior to kill them off.
  • Boomerang Bigot: One of the Super Battle Droids is very antagonistic toward robots, despite being, itself, a robot.
  • Born in the Saddle: It seems when they're not talking about elephants, the characters really have a thing for horses. More specifically, their hooves.
    "Make him on the hoof very dangerous."
    "As long as he is on the hoof."
    "He returns incredibly on the hoof."
    "I can feel she return on the hoof."
    "Is that baby on the hoof?"
  • Bring It:
    • Anakin's last line to Obi-Wan before their duel is changed from "You will try" to "Come."
    • Grevious's line of "Attack Kenobi" becomes "Come, section ratio."
  • Brutal Honesty: "The Presbyterian Church like, enjoys you not."
  • Buffy Speak: An Allah Gold specialty, with lines like "This honor and duties is a lot too big" and "You died at the time of livinging the child" (apparently "birthing" is not in his dictionary). Speaker D combines this with old-timey Purple Prose at times: “the Presbyterian church, like, enjoys you not.”
  • Bumbling Sidekick: The Republic Troopseses. One of them has to be reminded mid-battle whose side he's on ("We are Republicans, soldier!") while another can't shoot down an airship right in front of him until The D or the West Emperor gives him exact coordinates to fire at. Despite this, they still manage to wipe out most of the Hopeless Situation Warriors, thanks in part to their apparent Blind Obedience.
  • Call-Forward: "A day after the fair."
  • Captain Obvious:
    • One of Allah Gold's main character traits.
      • Early on, he declares that "The beginning accelerates."
      • Right before crash-landing half of Space General's airship that he, Speaker D, Ratio Tile and R2 are in. (Keep in mind that the ship is not only burning, the fire brigade have already arrived and started putting out the fire), he warns that "The temperature of our airship is too high."
      • He explains his troubles with the Presbyterian Church to The Plum Of by telling her that "some matters took place."
      • At the climax, he tells her "I can see your ship" while standing right in front of it.
    • Ratio Tile at one point claims that, "We have to hurry to act now!"
    • Ratio Tile tells Allah Gold "our faith believes in our religion."
    • Vanquish Is announces that "The current time arrived."
  • Catchphrase: A minor one, but the Shock Troopseses always responds to The D's orders by saying "Is! Follow instructions."
    • The Republic Troopseses respond to The D's orders to kill the Hopeless Situation Warriors by saying, "My host soon be finish."
  • Change the Uncomfortable Subject: When Allah Gold starts making disparaging comments about the West Emperor, D the Superior (who secretly is the West Emperor) turns it back around to the Parliament, saying "I also belong to the Hopeless Situation Presbyterian".
  • Character Level: Apparently the Hopeless Situation Warriors have something similar to this, as Allah Gold boasts to The that "My force has promoted two times" since their last encounter.
  • Church Militant: The Hopeless Situation Warriors that are in the Presbyterian Church qualify.
  • Cool Airship: There are no spaceships here, just airships. With elephants in them. The D is the only one to avert this, instead calling his personal ship a space craft.
  • The Comically Serious: All the original acting becomes this when paired with absolute Word Salad dialogue. Kudos to the actors in the dub for pulling it off without breaking down in helpless laughter. John Williams' music and George Lucas' cinematography also really add to this feel.
  • Composite Character: Apparenty, R2-D2 and Darth Plagueis are the same person, "Reach the Man". Alternatively, it's just an aversion of the One-Steve Limit.
  • Crazy-Prepared:
    • This appears to be Ratio Tile's strategy at the start of the movie. In a discussion with Allah Gold he acknowledges that they might be running into a trap, but adds that they will account for that and then account for that.
    • As soon as The D orders Space General to transfer his troops to "the wood method star", Space General tells him that it's already been completed.
  • Cultural Translation:
    • A rare case of translation going the opposite way: Padmé was not only called "The Plum Of" (in China, plums symbolize nobility and virtue) but also "Gets the Rice" (suggesting that Republic economy is based on rice, à la Feudal Japan).
    • The Space General punishing his robotic minions by feeding them dog might also be a case of this. note 
  • Dark Is Not Evil: It's unclear in this case, unlike in the series proper. The Dark, to begin with, is never directly connected to the Wish Power, and seems to be a neutral source of power unique unto itself. While it does seem to lend itself to more destructive abilities, the Hopeless Situation Warriors don't seem to consider it an abomination in the way the Jedi view the Dark Side of the Force. Of course, it's The D claiming most of the Dark's virtues, so take this with a grain of salt.
  • Deadly Euphemism: The Pudding weirdly combines this with an Aversion of Never Say "Die".
    "Then his land killed him to let him going to bed."
  • Deadpan Snarker: A lot of characters' dialogue makes more sense if you consider them to be this. Though it's harder to interpret them like this in the dubbed version, if only because most of the actors give dead serious performances.
  • Deal with the Devil: Possibly what Allah Gold means when he mentions holding tight a devil to end the war.
  • Department of Redundancy Department: A lot, most notably with Darth Vader's alternate name, "Reaching the West of Reaches."
    • "But we can will account and then account."
    • "The general space can always succeed to succeed."
    • "That he must the square who study it the square."
    • Allah Gold tells The Plum Of that "Just a dream is just." For added redundancy, she then says it to him later in the same scene.
    • "Like to like to look after them."
    • Ratio Tile helpfully informs us that: "Our faith believes in our religion."
    • "I needs must I should"
  • Disability Superpower: The line "Disabled person must solve" might indicate that Ratio Tile has one of these and that it will give him an advantage against Allah Gold.
  • Disproportionate Retribution: After expressing discomfort due to decapitating The, Allah Gold is comforted by The D, who tells him that the business of vengeance is very familiar.
  • The Drag-Along: Chewbacca's name was literally translated as "Drag Along."
  • Dramatic Pause: Used occasionally in the dub, in an attempt at making the new dialogue match the actors' lip movements. This generally adds to The Comically Serious nature of the dub.
    The D: "He is very deep... to black... influence... understanding."
  • Drugs Are Bad: Used by The Plum Of when she tells Allah Gold he's too high to own an "expectation value"... whatever that is.
  • Drugs Are Good: Vanquish Is apparently thinks that the remaining Hopeless Situation Warriors should use cocaine as a stimulant to make up for their lack of numbers.
    Vanquish Is: "Wait until the gram the person discovers. Will use very long hours."
  • Dub-Induced Plot Hole:
    • The Internal Reveal of The D being the Mole in Charge has been replaced with an As You Know statement about him being the governor of Coruscant. Thus, it seems like Allah Gold suddenly decides to kill him for no reason whatsoever, unless The D was just Trolling him and Allah Gold simply came to a silent realization of his actual identity. Perhaps Gold was just angrily condemning The D for his crimes by telling him that he has betrayed his duties as governor?
    • When informing Allah Gold of Space General's location, Speaker D says that he is "at particularly the system of..." and the line ends there.
  • Eating Machine: The battle droids might be this, if Space General's threat to feed them dog is any indication.
  • Emotional Torque: Brought up as a requirement for a combat report, of all things. Before Text How Big sends Allah Gold off to report the results of their battle to Speaker D, he adds that the report wants to make the person feel.
  • The Empire: Speaker D turns the Gram Republic into the Empire of the First Choice after becoming sick and disabled.
  • Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep":
    • Senator Bail Organa is simply known as "Senator".
    • General Grievous is similarly given the generic, but accurate name "Space General."
    • Commander Cody, like the first two, gets the more generic title of "Commanding Officer."
  • Failed a Spot Check:
    • At one point, a pilot has to be given exact coordinates to fire at in order to shoot down a Hopeless Situation Warrior who is flying directly in front of him.
    • When the medical droids explain The Plum Of's condition, Senator incredulously repeats "Child?", implying he hadn't noticed her extremely advanced pregnancy.
  • Fantastic Racism: The Hopeless Situation Warriors, and to an extent, the Presbyterian Church, really really despise those from the West. It backfires on them later when Speaker D, who is from the West, decides he's had enough of it, and promptly starts killing them off.
  • Fantasy Counterpart Culture: The Hopeless Situation Warriors might be the counterpart to Jews, depending on how you read Ratio Tile's statement that "Our faith believes in our religion, but is not to believe in a certain person."
  • The Farmer and the Viper: Ratio Tile approaches Space General, convinced that everybody is good. Space General immediately orders his troops to kill Ratio Tile.
  • Fate Worse than Death: Allah Gold threatens to "ruin" Ratio Tile, implying that he wants to give his old master one of these.
  • Felony Misdemeanor: According to Speaker D, the Parliament is supporting war by voting.
  • Fisher King: The Tragedy that Reach the Man is the story of a strong and big West Emperor who was killed by his land, perhaps after it got sick of his evil and abuse.
  • Flowery Elizabethan English:
    • A few words here and there fall under this trope, like "lo", "vexed" and "afresh". But the syntax of the translation is so mangled it often sounds very archaic. Many people have said that the dubbed version plays like a William Shakespeare performance.
    • A bit of a Genius Bonus - The translation "a day after the fair", replacing "too late" actually stems from an archaic expression meaning exactly that.
  • Foreshadowing:
    • Allah Gold asks the Ratio Tile "Is you make the ghost?" while on the Space General's airship. While the Ratio denies this, it could be foreshadowing Obi-Wan's eventual becoming into a Force ghost in the canon films. Alternatively, it could be a reference to that ship used by a crew of resistance fighters he would later hunt down as Reaches. It did include a few Hopeless Situations, after all. Though Ratio was not among them. (This would've truly been an example of this trope if this had been the case. This translation was made years before Rebels.)
    • Space General also makes a reference to Ratio Tile dying to settle an unspecified struggle. This could be a reference to Obi-Wan's death in A New Hope.
    • Similarly, Ratio Tile's declaration that he "was old" may be referencing the achronological release order of the Star Wars films by acknowledging that A New Hope takes place much later in Obi-Wan's life.
    • When D tells Allah Gold about Reaching The Man Cloth Space, Gold jumps to the conclusion that "In fact he can come back from the brink of death," which is what Gold/Reaches himself does at the end of the film.
  • Fountain of Youth: Ratio Tile possibly discovered something like this, since he talks about being old in the past tense.
  • Fun with Subtitles: The English subtitles contain the original, untranslated script.
  • Gender Flip: Particularly Reach the Master and Blow the Skin seem to be female in this version, judging by the former's voice and the latter being referred to as Senator's wife.
  • Genius Bruiser: The West seems to be this, since The D tells Allah that he must "study the square" in order to understand the The Dark World.
  • Geometric Magic: Speaker D implies that this is how the Dark World works.
  • The Ghost:
  • Glory Seeker: The members of the Presbyterian Church, according to both Speaker D and Gold.
    Speaker D: They are just a flock of to fish for fame its person. Even act as rivals with the Senate.
  • Go for the Eye: Ratio the Tile instructs R2 to destroy the last Airship Robot by "beat[ing] it the in-between eye".
  • Go-Karting with Bowser: Bizarrely, the Presbyterian Church seems to have been in email contact with the West up until Text How Big attempts to kill The D, judging by his line "The west ages is already on doing not reply."
    • Also "Ratio Prosperous drive with The."
  • Good Is Bad And Bad Is Good:
    • This exchange.
    Ratio Tile: The peaceful is willing to, D the superior is a bad person!
    Allah Gold: To me hero's is just bad person!note 
    Ratio Tile: Friend you are crazy!
    • The Presbyterian Church seems to believe this, as they punish Allah Gold for his track record of "long peace" by denying him a title.
  • Gratuitous German: The Pudding would be aller strong and big than anyone.
  • Grey-and-Gray Morality: For all their heroism, the Hopeless Situation Warriors perform some rather unsavory actions for the sake of their goals, and the villains are either Well Intentioned Extremists at best, like The D, or have redeeming qualities, like how Space General is a Benevolent Boss.
  • Heel–Face Revolving Door: When confronting The, who is "a big", Ratio Tile surprisingly reveals that he and Allah Gold are "for the big." However, they still proceed to fight him regardless. Alternatively, one could interpret this as meaning that the Hopeless Situation Warriors exist for dealing with the big. They are the solution for the problem.
  • Henpecked Husband: The Gets the Rice blames Allah Gold personally for the war, telling him it "represented your mistake."
  • Heroic Bastard: Allah Gold and The Gets the Rice's children are this, as Allah Gold mentions early on of thinking of nothing but getting married to The Gets the Rice, indicating that she had gotten pregnant out of wedlock in this version.
  • Heroic Self-Deprecation: While reporting to The D that he had killed the Abruption Doctrine leaders, Allah Gold describes himself as a barbarian despite having just ended the war, while referring to presumably himself in the third person.
  • Hoist by His Own Petard: The Hopeless Situation Warriors send Allah Gold to know The D at fuck, hoping that they can undermine him. It backfires stupendously as Allah Gold becomes The D's apprentice and annihilates their entire encampment.
  • Honor Before Reason: When Allah Gold says that Ratio Tile owes him seven times, Ratio reminds him that it's actually nine times (although the preceding events don't count for some reason). Perhaps Ratio Tile was so embarrassed by getting knocked out of the fight with The that he was willing to owe Allah Gold two more favors just to get him to drop it?
  • Hope Bringer: Could be the reason the Hopeless Situation Warriors got their name; a bunch of lightsaber-wielding space wizards backed by the Presbyterian Church who are called into action when all hope seems lost.
  • Honey Trap: A suprising male version of this trope — the Presbyterian Church sends Allah Gold for The D to "know him at fuck."
  • Honorable Elephant: The Good Elephant, considering his moniker.
  • Horrible Judge of Character:
    • When confronting Space General again, Ratio Tile claims everybody is good.note  He also has no problem with letting Allah Gold — who thinks that the best way to put an end to war is to have less freedom and start more wars — participate in peace negotiations.
    • Before his second fight with the Space General, he says he has “contacted good” after speaking with the silver, red-wearing landing delegation.
    • Allah Gold isn't much better. He's convinced that "Speaker D is not a bad person" and that "Heroes is just bad person."
  • Hover Tank: The Republic military apparently possesses an "air tank", which one of the Hopeless Situation Elders is upset to learn won't be sent into battle. Alternatively, "air tank" might refer to exactly what it refers to in our world, which is not nearly as cool, but much funnier.
  • Hulk Speak: Ratio Tile expresses how civilised he is.
    Ratio Tile: "Looking me am a civilization person."
  • Human Sacrifice: The seems to have something of a fixation on this, telling Allah Gold and Ratio Tile to "dedicate their bodies," before he fights them, and calling Allah Gold a "sacrifice article," before threatening to dismember him.
  • Hypocritical Humor:
    • A super battle droid calls Reach the Man a "stupid robot" before said robot defeats him and another droid of the same model rather embarrassingly by spraying oil in their faces and lighting them on fire.
    • Immediately after unceremoniously and rather gruesomely immolating Space General to death with a blaster, Ratio Tile says:
  • Ice-Cream Koan:
    • This gem that leaves Allah Gold and most likely the audience utterly baffled:
    Speaker D: Allah Gold, if a person wants to comprehend, that he must the square who study it the square, but only a little bit much more than only concerning. If you like to be a leads more astutely, that you must accept this more great power. But want the caution Hopeless Situation, Allah Gold, you only ask for help me then can become the...the knowledge of the dark of the study Hopeless, in the fire of water. (twisted little grin)
    Allah Gold: You say what?
    • Much of the dialogue comes across like this, notably when Ratio Tile and Vanquish Is find the bodies of the younglings slaughtered by Reaching the West of Reaches... And immediately dive into a philosophical debate about whether children can exist.
  • Idiot Ball: Discussed by Space General while addressing his Abruption Doctrine allies, claiming that they are only foolish on that particular star.
  • Ignore the Disability: Space General invokes this by telling Ratio Tile that he'll just ignore the fact that Ratio is already dead, having "died to settle" some past struggle.
  • I Have Many Names: A few characters.
    • Anakin is usually referred to as "Allah Gold", or sometimes simply "Gold." After his turn to the Black Influence, he is referred to as "The Peaceful Is Willing To" by the Hopeless Situation Warriors, or "Reaching the West of Reaches" by Speaker D aka West Emperor. Yoda calls him "A Line." Several times, The Plum Of calls him simply "Line." Ratio also called him "Line" at the start.
    • Obi-Wan is alternately called "The Willing to Compares" and "Ratio the Tile." The opening scroll also calls him "Ratio Prosperous." A Presbyterian Church Elder calls him "Card Ratio." Commanding Officer calls him "The Section pulIs the Ratio." Senator calls him, "The compares the willing to Ratio." Blow the Skin calls him, "The willing to compares host."
    • Palpatine is usually known as D the speaker/the speaker D/speaker/Mr. speaker. He calls himself "the member of senate" and "the governor of this city" once each. His alter ego, Darth Sidious, is known as west emperor or simply emperor. His henchmen refer to him as host, or "my host".
  • Immediate Self-Contradiction:
    • Allah Gold creates one when asking to join the Parliament of the Presbyterian Church.
    "Let me enter the Parliament, do not let me."
    • Allah Gold seems very conflicted about his impending fatherhood, since he dismissively tells The Plum Of "I do not need the child's help," then immediately proclaims proudly that "Our baby blesses god'sly."
    • The D remarks that Allah Gold is “affirmative to have doubted.” He also uses the phrase "a little bit much more."
    • After The D encounters an injured Allah Gold, he tells the Shock Troopseses to "Grasp the person right away." They dutifully reply "Is, follow instructions!", but then just scamper away without doing anything.
    • But the ultimate example of this might come from The Plum Of's medical examination.
    Medical Droid: "Check result, she complete health but we can't explain why she quick dead."
  • Improvised Weapon: Possibly what Speaker D is talking about when he says "I beat the Intelligence Bureau the telephone."
  • Invasion of the Baby Snatchers: Allah Gold's premonition seemingly depicts The Plum Of tearfully begging for her baby to be returned, which gives the impression that Gold turns to the Dark World just to prevent a child abduction.
  • It's What I Do: When The Speaker D warns Ratio tile and Allah Gold that The is "a big", he reassures the Speaker that he and Allah are "for the Big."
  • Lame Comeback:
    • Not that the original insult was all that witty, but Space General's comeback is just bad.
    Allah Gold: "Space General, you and not equal to I think severe."
    Space General: "Smelly boy."
  • Large and in Charge: The villains often talk about their desire to become "strong and big." Clearly, size equals authority and power in this universe.
  • Lighter and Softer: Even leaving aside the fact that many scenes are rendered hilarious by the translations, the overall tone is lighter. Among other things, the conflict is severely watered down. Everyone agrees that Allah Gold is a good fit for the council, the Sith are barely even implied to exist, and most of the characters are polite and compassionate, even the villains from the original movie (with the exception of The, who dies after one scene). The only element that's really darker than the original is Ratio Tile's swearing.
  • Like Is, Like, a Comma: Many characters talk like this:
    • "Like, reach the man, good good good let us counter-attacking."
    • "Like, this time do not calculate in fact."
    • "The Presbyterian Church like, enjoys you not."
    • "Like, record, you owe me a."
  • A Long Time Ago, in a Galaxy Far, Far Away...: Subverted, suprisingly enough. The opening lines are translated fairly accurately, but they turn out to be wrong, as The D clearly states that they are in the Milky Way.
  • Love Dodecahedron: Allah Gold's love life is... confusing, to say the least. He loves The Plum Of and she returns his feelings, but Speaker D convinces him to cheat on her with him. He also seems to believe that she's also cheating, presumably with Ratio Tile. Confusingly, he takes offense to this despite wanting to make out with Ratio himself.
  • The Mafia: The Presbyterian Church, possibly. Allah Gold says that they "made" him at one point.
  • Meaningful Name: Ratio suddenly begins referring to Allah Gold as "The Peaceful is Willing To" only after his fall to the Dark World. Appropriate, given that Gold has proven himself to be willing to do quite a lot in order to preserve peace.
  • Medium Awareness: Allah Gold is apparently aware that he's a character in a movie, as he remembers the scene were he sent The Plum Of her necklace. Either that, or Hayden Christensen just broke character to lampshade that he wasn't actually in that movie.
  • The Men First: Twice Space General offers himself up to distract Ratio (and Gold the first time) so that his underlings won't be forced to fight them. The first time, on his airship, he urges the crew to flee after his bodyguards are dispatched, and the second time comes when he tells his troops to let him handle Ratio alone.
  • Metaphorgotten: It's hard to know what exactly Ratio Tile was attempting to convey with his statement that "The front is a lemon avenue flying straightly." When you're trying to crash land a burning airship, it's not really the time to toss out an Ice-Cream Koan. Maybe airship landing pads are called 'lemon avenues' on this planet, and Ratio Tile was giving Allah Gold directions. Or he was saying that Lemon Avenue is the best landing pad in reach.
  • Mistreatment-Induced Betrayal: According to Speaker D, the Presbyterian Church enjoys Allah Gold not, which motivates him to join the West.
  • Mood Whiplash: This can happen in the dub, whenever a serious, silent scene is interrupted by a ridiculous, poorly traslated line. For instance, the dramatic scene where Drop is executed is followed by the remark "You make out quite good."
  • Motifs: References to geometry keep popping up. One of the main characters has the first name Ratio, another's nickname is Line, and D talks about studying squares. Well, the opening scroll has the line, "Two squares fight the vehemence."
  • My God, What Have I Done?: After helping The Speaker D kill Text How Big, Allah Gold experiences a brief pang of conscience:
    Allah Gold: I did what?!
  • Name That Unfolds Like Lotus Blossom: Because of the way the original names were translated, some characters have long, unwieldy names such as "The Peaceful is Willing To" or "Reaching the Man Cloth Space".
  • Nations as People: Space General seems to think the Republic is a living entity, and that Ratio Tile and Allah Gold are its bodyguards. That, or he's being metaphorical and flowery.
  • New Job as the Plot Demands:
    • The D is cited as holding at least 6 different positions throughout the movie, being called both the Speaker and Prime Minister of the Senate (and at one point declares himself no more than a member of the Senate, but Text How Big calls his bluff), as well as being the Governor of the city of Coruscant, as well as being Emperor of the West (long before he actually becomes Emperor in the real movie) and at the end he forms the Empire of the First Choice. Later on, his troopseses refer to him by the title of "Big King."
    • Allah Gold also does this. He starts out as a Hopeless Situation Warrior. Then Speaker D inducts him into an unspecified military as a private (though he also describes it as a civilian office). This also makes Gold eligible to become an Elder. The Parliament accepts this, but does not grant him the title in retaliation for his "long peace". Then he becomes Reaching the West of Reaches then South Host.
    • Ratio Tile is another example, perhaps. The opening scroll calls him "Ratio prosperous." Next, Allah Gold calls him "teacher" though later on he's just "master." As he declares everybody is good to the large robot army, Space General yells "Section Ratio General."
  • No Good Deed Goes Unpunished: Ratio Tile explains that Allah Gold has been denied a title because the Hopeless Situation Parliament does not like his history of "long peace."
  • No-Nonsense Nemesis: When informed that Ratio Tile and Allah Gold have landed in his airship, Space General immediately orders his troops to kill them, even though his troops merely wanted to hinder them.
  • No Party Given: Averted. Characters identify themselves as Republicans more than once.
  • Non-Dubbed Grunts: The dub reverts to the actual Revenge of the Sith voice track for most interjections during fight scenes and the like.
  • Non-Indicative Name:
    • The leaders of the Hopeless Situation are called the Presbyterian Church, but don't seem to believe in original sin or predestination, if you go by Ratio Tile's declaration that "everybody is good."
      • Given the above, and Ratio Tile's comment that "Apparently I depraved", they don't believe in total depravity either.
      • They may not even be Christian, given that their faith "is not to believe in a certain person."
      • If they are Christian, their version of the Nicene Creed must use the phrase "Good of Good."
    • Also applies to the title of the movie itself. At no point does anyone from the West perform any swimming, and the one person who does (Ratio Tile) doesn't do the backstroke.
  • Non Sequitur: Happens constantly, due to the poor translation.
  • Noodle Incident:
    • Apparently, there was some kind of fair the day before the movie began. For some reason, it's very important that it's now the day afterwards. Maybe that's where the good elephant comes from?
    • Whatever Space General did to establish his reputation as "very deceitful" is never elaborated on. Unless it was in reference to the fact he's a fallen Hopeless Situation Warrior: that certainly would count as treachery.
    • The Gets The Rice at one point tells Allah Gold that she "was pregnant," with accompanying dramatic music, implying a very dark plot twist, but the rest of the film proceeds to depict a relatively normal pregnancy culminating in the birth of two healthy babies.
    • When summarizing a combat report that Allah Gold missed, Ratio mentions that he's apparently depraved. He doesn't elaborate and changes the subject quickly.
    • Allah Gold apparently made some unspecified mistake in the past, which The Gets the Rice blames for starting the war.
    • At one point, it's mentioned that, when Allah Gold was a child, Ratio Tile "did" his teacher. This is never brought up again or elaborated on.
  • Novelization: Two fan-made ones, both found on FanFiction.Net. Also more on FanFiction.net now. More on Archive of Our Own such as Backstroke of the West (The Novelization) incomplete and The Saga of The Good Elephant.
  • No, You: Text How Big and Speaker D:
    Text How Big: You failed!
    Speaker D: Not! Not, YOU just failed!!!
  • Number of the Beast: One of Speaker D's lines references it when he orders the destruction of the Hopeless Situation Warriors.
    Speaker D: The dynasty opens fire 66, 60:00
  • Obfuscating Stupidity: Allah Gold advises R2 to do this, telling him he needs him "foolish in ship".
  • Obligatory Swearing: Particularly bad since the original film had no swearing in the first place. Here however, Ratio the Tile drops the F-bomb more than once. Explanation
  • Offscreen Moment of Awesome: It's too bad we never get to see The Good Elephant flying his airship.
  • Older Than They Look: The Space General may be older than he appears, even as a cyborg. He refers to himself as "old man" when telling his troops that he'll fight Ratio Tile alone.
  • Old Windbag: The Hopeless Situation Elders of the Presbyterian Church are this to Allah Gold. Shortly after organizing a strategy for an important battle, Allah Gold's first thought is, "Is really boring."
  • Overly Long Gag: An unintentional example. Having the Jedi be referred to as "Hopeless Situations" is funny at first, but the word "Jedi" is said a lot in this movie, so it really can get grating after a while.
  • Parrot Exposition: Before The Plum Of dies in childbirth, this exchange between a medical droid and Ratio Tile:
    Droid: Check result, she complete health but we can't explain why she quick dead.
    Ratio Tile: Does she die quickly?
    Droid: We must proceed the surgical operation right away, talent extrication child.
    Ratio Tile: Child?
  • People's Republic of Tyranny: The D calls his oppressive regime "The Empire of the First Choice", likely being an invocation of this trope.
  • Planetville: In contrast to the real movies, this is Averted here. Vanquish Is manages to escape The D's notice simply by leaving the country.
  • Pluralses: Not only that, but Pluralseses also make an appearance:
    • Allah Gold talks about how he does not like "politicseses."
    • He later speaks to Vanquish Is about the "dreamses" he's been having.
    • At one point, Text How Big talks about the "troopseses."
    • At the very end of the movie, the droids are referred to as "childses."
    • The unexpected -es suffixing pops up in non-plural words as well. The Pudding commands Allah Gold, "Doing you needses must its matter", and Text How Big feels Allah Gold "cans not handles" the task of spying on The D.
  • The Power of Hate: Though the Sith from the original are known to fuel hatred into strength, The D seems to take it a step further here: he declares to the Senate that "My power has always been to have no like!"
  • Power of the Void: Speaker D claims to have a "great void", but it may not be the most reliable source of power, seeing as how he claims in the same scene that it was weak during his fight with Text How Big.
  • Pre-Asskicking One-Liner: Ratio Tile after Space General taunts him for already being dead.
    Space General: Ignore you to how struggle you died to settle.
    Ratio Tile: I can not think so. (He uses the Wish Power to throw Space General up into the air)
  • Product Placement: Subverted. The original movie did not have any products from outside the Star Wars universe. This movie referred to the West Emperor as "Big King" ... the name of a sandwich from Burger King, who was promoting the original movie. Subverted as, at the time, the sandwich of that name was discontinued.
  • Raging Stiffie: It sure must be pretty embarrassing for Allah Gold when The Pudding tells him that he's "already at full cock."
  • Reading the Stage Directions Out Loud: Space General's "Beat, we are great and black influences" might be an example of this.
  • Red Light District: Space General may be hiding out in one. When Ratio Tile goes to find him, he's given directions by Commanding Officer to "the pimping mainland."
  • Refuge in Audacity: There's no Order 66 in this version. Speaker D just flat-out tells Commanding Officer, as well as the other Republic Troopseses, to kill the Hopeless Situation Warriors.
  • Religion is Magic: The Force doesn't exist. There's only The Wish Power. Let alone the fact that the Jedi Council is translated as the Presbyterian Church.
  • The Republic: The Gram Republic, which the Speaker D turns into the Empire of the First Choice following him becoming disabled and sick.
  • The Reveal:
    • Space General was once a Hopeless Situation Warrior, and may even have served with Ratio Tile.
    • Speaker D being the governor of the city is treated as this.
  • Right Hand Versus Left Hand: Speaker D apparently had to beat the Republic's Intelligence Bureau to the telephone in order to figure out where the Space General was hiding.
  • Robosexual: Senator seems to be this, as evidenced by his sudden declaration that Blow the Skin "is my wife" in the penultimate scene, something that even Blow the Skin seems shocked about.
  • Satan Is Good: Allah Gold wants to hold tight a devil to win the war. To be fair, 'devil' could have been referring to the Space General.
  • Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness: Turns "I have the high ground" into "The geography that I stands compares you superior." Which also has the opposite meaning of the original line.
  • Serious Business: The D and Ratio Tile both say that Allah Gold's exasperation might lead him to the dark world.
  • Shout-Out:
    "Exterminate them!"
  • Sir Swears-a-Lot: Ratio Tile, who apparently loves to use the word "fuck" a lot.
  • Space "X": Two characters have 'space' added to their names; Space General and Reaching the Man Cloth Space.
  • Speak Ill of the Dead: Speaker D is very dismissive of The when he discusses his death with Space General, suggesting that The's dying is the very epitome of irrelevance.
    "His dead is what doesn't matter!"
  • Spell My Name with a "The": Most of the characters at one point or another: Allah Gold and Ratio Tile, for example, are often shortened to "the Gold" and "the Ratio", respectively, while Speaker D is commonly referred to simply as "The D." Possibly the most triumphant example, however, is Count Dooku, who was renamed to simply "The" (although Ratio Tile also addresses him as "Drop" once).
  • Strange-Syntax Speaker: Everyone. Besides Pluralses, they also add verb tenses to prepositions ("Toing have the patience."), turn gerunds into present participles ("You died at the time of livinging the child."), and place seemingly random words into past tense ("A line have beened distorted by the Dark World. You the trained boy noed longer is already.").
  • Sudden Name Change: Presumably, the translation wasn't done all in one go. This is evidenced by characters' names changing between scenes. At one point, Anakin will be called 'Allah Gold', but later on everyone will call him 'The Peaceful is Willng To', for example.
  • Then Let Me Be Evil: A possible interpretation of Allah Gold's fall to the Dark World, judging from him suffering under No Good Deed Goes Unpunished and Henpecked Husband.
  • This Is Gonna Suck: When trying to fly into The Space General's airship, only to notice the rapidly closing gate, Ratio the Tile says "I feel far from good."
  • Toilet Humour: "The good elephant in airship dropped what things?" It's implied that the elephant's poo caused an explosion which made the entire ship break apart.
  • Too Long; Didn't Dub: This happens very frequently, with only the first part of a line being translated and the rest omitted. For example, a line from the original about the Jedi needing to take control of the Senate is simply translated, "The Hopeless Situation Presbyterian Church." (equivalent to just saying, "The Jedi Council".) Some lines, such as Qui-Gon's name, were removed completely.
  • Translation Train Wreck: Doesn't even begin to cover it. Let's see what some of the names were translated to:
    • Jedi Council -> Presbyterian Church
    • Jedi Knight -> Hopeless Situation Warrior / Hero's Ground
    • The Dark Side -> The Dark World / The Black Influence / The Evil Augury
    • Sith -> West
    • Sith Lord -> South Host / Big / West Emperor / Governor of the City
    • Separatists -> Abruption Doctrine
    • Anakin Skywalker -> Allah Gold / The Peaceful Is Willing To / Line
    • Obi-Wan Kenobi -> Ratio Tile / The Willing to Compares
    • Count Dooku -> The / Drop
    • General Grievous -> Space General
    • Chancellor Palpatine -> The Speaker D / The Pudding / Prime Minister
    • Padmé Amidala -> The Gets the Rice / The Plum Of
    • Yoda -> Vanquish Is / Particularly Reach the Master
    • Mace Windu -> Text How Big
    • C-3PO -> Blow the Skin
    • R2-D2 -> R2 / Reach the Man
    • Chewbacca -> Drag Along
    • Bail Organa -> Senator
    • Commander Cody -> Commanding Officer
    • Darth Vader -> Reaching the West of Reaches
    • Darth Plagueis -> Reach the Man / Reaching the Man Cloth Space / The Emperor
    • Luke Skywalker -> See Me
    • The Galactic Empire -> The Empire of the First Choice
    • The Force -> Original Dint / Wish Power
    • Buzz Droid -> Airship Robot
    • Clone Trooper -> Republic Troops / Troopseses
  • Translation: "Yes": Obi-Wan's line "Don't try it!" along with Captain Antilles' line "Yes, your highness?" simply become "Is."
  • Understatement: Upon finding out that he supposedly killed The Plum Of, Reaching the West of Reaches gives a long, drawn out, "Do not want", indicating his displeasure at learning such a fact.
  • Unexplained Recovery: Ratio Tile seems pretty fine for somebody who - if the Space General is to be believed - has already died.
  • The Unreveal: If you're waiting to see how Qui-Gon's name is translated, prepare yourself for disappointment. The translators apparently thought his name was to difficult to translate, so they removed it completely.
  • Villain Respect: Space General is generally pleasant when conversing with his foes, he repeatedly refers to Allah Gold and Ratio Tile as "sir"
  • Vocal Dissonance: Compared to the original Revenge of the Sith actors, the voices in the dubbed version go a couple different ways. Some are remarkably accurate imitations (Anakin, Obi-Wan, Padmé, Dooku, Mace Windu). Others are way off, but clearly intended to fall under Rule of Funny. Palpatine/The D has a flat American accent, Yoda/Vanquish Is has a raspy woman's voice, and Grievous/Space General sounds like an evil Comic Book Guy.
  • War Is Glorious/War Is Hell: Allah Gold seems to think that "less freedom with more wars" is a good thing and also seems to treat battles as a game. Then again, he also seems to believe that starting more wars will make it easier to end war, makes reference twice to wanting to end war itself as a concept, has a history of "long peace", and is involved with peace negotiations, so where exactly he stands on this subject is rather confusing.
  • War Was Beginning: Rather bluntly expressed in the opening crawl translation as "The war came!"
  • Well-Intentioned Extremist: As mentioned above, Allah Gold seems to want to abolish the concept of war in its entirety, but ends up becoming a West to do it.
  • Wham Line: "Did you heard the tragedy that Reach the Man?" For context, Reach the Man (Darth Plagueis) is also the alternate name of R2 in this version. Fittingly, ominous music kicks in following this line.
  • What the Hell, Hero?: One interpretation of Allah Gold's line about D being governor of the city. He may be reprimanding him for his use of the dark power, by reminding him of his responsibilities as governor.
  • Word Salad Philosophy: Many, many mangled sayings come off as this.
  • Word Salad Title: Due to being mangled in the translation, of course.
  • Worthy Opponent:
    • Space General refers to Ratio Tile formally as “Section Ratio General” and says he's “really a day of brave.”
    • Given that "Is" is the affirmative answer, Ratio Tile acknowledges Allah Gold's ability when Gold accuses him of underrating it.
  • You Can Say That Again:
    • Allah Gold says this word-for-word to The Pudding.
    • "He cans say that again that system is very," said Text How Big when deciding to send Ratio Tile after the Space General.
  • You Have Outlived Your Usefulness: The D tells Gold that he has "completed [his] usage." Though he doesn't kill him after this. He just gives him a new mission.
  • You're Insane!: "Friend, you are crazy!" said by Ratio Tile to Allah Gold after Gold expresses that he thinks hero's is just bad person.
  • You Owe Me: Allah Gold to Ratio Tile after the former rescues the latter on the Space General's airship. Incidentally, the Ratio (whether out of sheer generosity or by a Freudian slip) manages to get himself deeper into debt:
    Allah Gold: Like, record, you owe me a. You owed seven times.
    Ratio Tile: Is nine times, in fact. Like, this time do not calculate. In fact.


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