Recap / Taskmaster Series Seventeen

Taskmaster recap index
British series:
Series: One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight | Nine | Ten | Eleven | Twelve | Thirteen | Fourteen | Fifteen | Sixteen | Seventeen
Specials: Champion of Champions | New Year Treats and One-Offs
New Zealand series:
Seasons: One | Two | Three | Four
Australian series:
Seasons: One

Cast

From left: Nick Mohammed, Joanne McNally, Greg Davies, Steve Pemberton, Alex Horne, John Robins, Sophie Willan

• Taskmaster: Greg Davies
• Taskmaster's Assistant: Alex Horne
• Contestants: Joanne McNally, John Robins, Nick Mohammed, Sophie Willan and Steve Pemberton
• Teams:
  • Nick Mohammed and Steve Pemberton
  • Joanne McNally, John Robins and Sophie Willan

Episodes

Episode 1 - "Grappling With My Life"

• Prize Task: The Most Glorious Thing That Sounds a Bit Like "Greg Davies" If You Mumble It.
  • Winner: Steve - "Peg Mavis": a peg doll of Mavis from Coronation Street (5 points)
  • John - "Grieg Diaries": the diary entries of Norwegian composer Edvard Grieg (4 points)
  • Sophie - "Egg babies": eggs that have been turned into miniature dolls (3 points)
  • Nick - "Eggs Benedict": literally just a plate of Eggs Benedict (2 points)
  • Joanne - "Glug gravies": a gravy boat that glugs when poured (1 point)

• Task 1: Do The Riskiest Thing Involving This Egg Without Breaking This Egg. The Egg In The Greatest Danger That Doesn't Break Wins.
  • Winner: John - made a film about him being driven home by an egg wife while the egg's husband was out on cow-riding lessons, only to narrowly avoid him and swerve into a brick wall. ^NoteJohn would later say this got him in a two hour-long meeting with production (5 points)
  • Joanna - wrapped the egg in bubble wrap, threw it against a wall, and later used it to play tennis with Alex. (4 points)
  • Nick, Sophie and Steve (Disqualified):
    • Nick - boiled the egg before throwing bricks as close to it as he possibly could, until one brick hit the egg and cracked it.
    • Sophie - balanced the egg on her head, which fell and broke.
    • Steve - Made a short film about the explorer Eggbert Nobacon and his trusty goat Shelly escaping a pair of poachers and navigating a hazardous road, only for the egg to fall out and break while Steve was opening the door on his way out.

• Task 2: Team Task - Create The Best Single Picture Of An Animal Doing Something Surprising. All Six Blinds Must Be Fully And Equally Involved In Your Picture. You May Not See Each Other's Work, And You May Only Say Two Words At A Time. After The Task, Your Pieces Will Be Lined Up In This Particular Order: 1. Shortest Wikipedia Entry, 2. Best Show At The Edinburgh Fringe Winner, 3. Smallest Shoe Size, 4. The Person Who Alex Said Hello To First, 5. Most Twitter Followers, 6. Lowest-Scoring Full Name In Scramble. You May Not Move Outside Of Your Segment. You Have Fifteen Minutes.
  • Winner: Nick and Steve - a giraffe giving birth, although Steve made landscape paintings and Nick made portrait ones, resulting in it being somewhat jumbled up. (5 points)
  • Joanne, John and Sophie - a dog driving a car, a cow dancing and a bird smoking, which the Taskmaster described as a legitimately decent art piece despite its lack of accuracy. (3 points)

• Task 3: Hoopla Gary^*An inflatable gorilla on a small raft Before He Crosses The Finish Line. Your Time Is Doubled Every Time One Of Your Limbs Gets Wet. Fastest Wins.^*Behind the contestants was a scarecrow wearing gear which could keep the contestants dry
  • Winner: Joanne - 48 seconds (5 points)
  • Steve - 1 minute 28 seconds (4 points)
  • John - 2 minutes 5 seconds (3 points)
  • Nick - 11 minutes total, took 2 minutes 45 seconds and got two limbs wet. (2 points)
  • Sophie (Disqualified)^*Failed to hoopla Gary in time. Also had a near incident while wading through the water and stepping in some quicksand.

• Live Task: Bring Your Sausage To Life. You Have Thirty Seconds. You May Not Write Any Words On Your Drawing. Best Sausage Wins. Round 1: Most Human Sausage. Round 2: Scariest Sausage. Round 3: Sportiest Sausage. Round 4: Sexiest Sausage.^*Adapted from Taskmaster Australia
  • Winner: Joanne (5 points)
  • Steve (4 points)
  • John (3 points)
  • Sophie (2 points)
  • Nick (1 point)

• Tiebreaker: Which Chess Piece Is Not In The Peas Chest? Fastest Correct Answer Wins.
  • Winner: Steve - 13 seconds (+1 Tiebreaker Point)^note Steve found the missing chess piece on the shelf behind the table
  • John - 1 minute 26 seconds
  • Joanne - 4 minutes 28 seconds

• Episode Ranking:
  1. Winner: Steve (18 points + 1 tiebreaker point)
  2. John (18 points)
  3. Joanne (18 points)
  4. Nick (10 points)
  5. Sophie (8 points)

Episode 2 - "Jumungo"

• Prize Task: The Most Fun Thing To Turn Upside-Down.
  • Winners:
    • Steve - A calculator, to spell BOOBIES when held upside-down, and then a whole haiku written with an upside-down calculator (5 points)
    • Joanne - A bat, to represent how a group of bats hanging upside-down resembles a goth rave (5 points)
  • Nick - A bongo drum, which his mother had mistakenly thought was and used as a flower vase (4 points)
  • John - The logo of the Chicago Bulls, which resembles a robot having sex with a crab when turned upside-down (3 points)
  • Sophie - Meat pudding, which is turned upside-down when served (1 point)

• Task 1: Rescue The Cat. The Cat Must Come Out Of The Top Hole. Your Head May Not Enter The Dome. The Door Must Be Closed. Fastest Wins.
  • Winner: Steve - 2 minutes 19 seconds (5 points)
  • John - 3 minutes 24 seconds^*Found the grabber hidden within the pole provided (4 points)
  • Nick - 14 minutes (3 points)
  • Joanne - 22 minutes 20 seconds (2 points)
  • Sophie - 26 minutes 6 seconds (1 point)

• Task 2: Team Task - Do The Most Epic Thing Using Green Material And This Greenscreen Onesie. You Have 30 Minutes.
  • Winners: Joanne, John and Sophie - A film where Sophie portrays a bored Tudor queen who discovers a magic talking lizard and licks it, resulting in a flurry of objects flying around her before she herself flies off, with a bit of difficulty (5 points)
  • Nick and Steve - A short film where Steve conjures an invisible helper to cook and serve him pancakes (4 points)

• Task 3: Stick The Heaviest Thing To The Board Using Three Of The Ingredients On The Shelves. Once You've Chosen Your Ingredients, You May Not Change Your Mind. Heaviest Thing That Sticks To The Board For At Least 1 Minute Wins. You Have 12 Minutes, And You Must Choose Your Thing In The First 2 Minutes.
  • Winner: Sophie - a large decorative star, which she managed to hook onto the whiteboard (3.3kg) (5 points)
  • Steve - a statue of David (713g) (4 points)
  • Joanne - a toy fish (85g) (3 points)
  • John and Nick (Disqualified)^*Both failed to keep their objects (a chopping board and a water bottle) stuck to the board for a full minute

• Live Task: Team Task - Guess The Movie That Your Teammate Is Saying. Your Teammate Can Only Say The First Three Letters Of Each Word Of The Movie Title. Most Movies In Each Round Wins.^*In Round 3, contestants were required to say only the last three letters of each word
  • Winners: Joanne, John and Sophie - 2 rounds (5 points)^*Round 1 - 8 points, Round 2 - 8 points, Round 3 - 1 point
  • Nick and Steve - 1 round (3 points)^*Round 1 - 6 points, Round 2 - 6 points, Round 3 - 2 points

• Episode Ranking:
  1. Winner: Steve (21 points)
  2. Joanne (20 points)
  3. Sophie (17 points)
  4. John (17 points)
  5. Nick (14 points)

Episode 3 - "Some impropriety?"

• Prize Task: Best Thing For A Person That Is Meant For An Animal
  • Winner: John - A howdah, a type of elephant chair (5 points)
  • Joanne - A trough (4 points)
  • Sophie - A timed cat feeder (3 points)
  • Steve - A scratching brush (2 points)
  • Nick - A clear Elizabethan collar for humans, to be worn around the wrists/elbows (1 point)

• Task 1: Work Out Who^*Mr. Blobby Is Following You. You Must Stare At The Duck At All Times, And Take An Average Length's Step Towards The Duck Every Time It Quacks. If The Person Following You Agrees With You, They Will Say The Name Of A Mammal. If The Person Following You Disagrees With You, They Will Say The Name Of A Bird. If The Person Following You Doesn't Know If They Agree Or Disagree With You, They Will Say The Name Of An Amphibian. The Correct Answer Furthest From The Duck Wins.
  • Winner: Joanne - 26 paces away (5 points)
  • John - 19 paces away (4 points)
  • Steve - 15 paces away (3 points)
  • Nick - 0 paces away (2 points)
  • Sophie (Disqualified)^*Accidentally turned around and saw who was following her.

• Task 2: Complete The Jobstacle Course^*Do The Dishes, Hang The Laundry, Dust The Carpet, Prepare The Milk, Clean Greg's Shoes, Change The Nappy. Each Job Must Be Completed To A Satisfactory Quality Level. The Baby^*a container of water Must Remain In The Baby Carrier At All Times Except During Nappy Change. You Must Complete The Jobstacle Course Within 8 Minutes. The Least Baby Spilt Wins.
  • Winner: John - 0% of the baby spilt (5 points)^*Realised that he didn't need to wear the baby carrier while completing the course
  • Steve - 7% of the baby spilt (4 points)
  • Joanne - 16.6% of the baby spilt (3 points)
  • Sophie - 20% of the baby spilt (2 points)
  • Nick - 25% of the baby spilt (1 point)

• Task 3: Create Tension. Most Tension Created Wins. You Have 20 Minutes
  • Winner: Joanne - Got uncomfortably close to Alex, sniffed his beard, and compared him to her lost father (5 points)
  • Nick and Steve (4 points)
    • Nick - Attempted (and failed) to perform some delicate magic tricks
    • Steve - Recreated the Russian roulette scene from The Deer Hunter, playing Hangman against Alex
  • John - Hooked Alex and himself up to a tension metre and generated 98 newtons of tension (3 points)
  • Sophie - Balanced on one foot with a cup on her head and hissed at Alex like a snake (1 point)

• Live Task: Catch The Most Monsters In Your Boxes^*Right arm - x1 monster, head - x2 monsters, leg - x3 monsters, back - x4 monsters, left shoulder - x5 monsters. The Monsters Must Propel Themselves From The Table. Most Monsters In Boxes After Two Minutes Wins.
  • Winner: John - 10 monsters (5 points)
  • Steve - 8 monsters (4 points)
  • Sophie - 6 monsters (3 points)^*Knocked over her table early and resorted to launching monsters from the stage. Taskmaster accepted her attempt out of pity
  • Nick - 5 monsters (2 points)
  • Joanne - 2 monsters (1 point)

• Episode Ranking:
  1. Winner: John (22 points)
  2. Joanne (18 points)
  3. Steve (17 points)
  4. Nick (10 points)
  5. Sophie (9 points)

Episode 4 - "Apropos of Apoppo"

• Prize Task: The Best Thing For A Granny
  • Winner: John - Wine, chocolate and cigarettes, treats he regularly bought for his elderly neighbour (5 points)
  • Steve - Cards he sent to his grandmother as a child (4 points)
  • Nick - A 'good luck potion' his son made, which might ease the dying process (3 points)
  • Sophie - An animal-print bodysuit, of the kind her grandmother used to wear (2 points)
  • Joanne - A gold dental grill (1 point)

• Task 1: Work Out Who You Are Shaking Hands With. You Must Only Shake Hands With The Hands^note The fence in front of the contestants had nine rubber gloves attached. The gloves were filled with, in order: 1. Acorns 2. Lipstick 3. Eggs 4. Xylophone 5. Hand (the actual hand of a staffer standing behind the fence) 6. Onions 7. Rum 8. Nails 9. Egg, And You May Not Handle The Hands In Any Other Way. You May Chop Off A Total Of Three Fingers And One Thumb, But If You Set Off The Health And Safety Emergency Alarm, You Are Disqualified. Also, You May Not Look Around, Over, Under Or Through The Fence. Best Hand Identification Wins^note When identified correctly, the items spell out the acrostic Alex Horne; the position of the gloves on the fence also spelled AH. You Have A Maximum Of 20 Minutes. Your Time Starts Now.
  • Winner: Nick - 8 items and the name (5 points)
  • Joanne - 5 items and the name (4 points)
  • John - 6 items (3 points)
  • Sophie - 5 items (2 points)
  • Steve - 3 items (1 point)

• Task 2: Create The Biggest And Best Dot-to-Dot Picture. Biggest And Best Dot-to-Dot Picture Wins. You Have 20 Minutes. Your Time Starts Now.
  • Winners: John and Sophie (5 points)
    • John - A snail
    • Sophie - A cow
  • Steve - The Mona Lisa (3 points)
  • Joanne - A twirly penny farthing-style mustache (2 points)
  • Nick - A "very happy" snake (1 points)

• Task 3: Team Task: 5, 6, 7, Half 9, Half 11, 5, Half 4. Fastest Team To Discover The Other Half Of This Task Wins. You Must Always Hold Hands. Your Time Starts Now.^note The numbers on the task were instructions on how to find the other half. Reading words 5, 6, and 7, (the other half), half of word 9 (this), half of word 11 (wins), word 5 again (the), and half of word 4 (discover) reveals the hidden phrase "The other half is in the disc", referring to a CD hung up in the Taskmaster home. Finding the other half reveals that the real task was "Fastest team to go to the lab, discover the cake, eat one half, put the other half in the postbox, put a flower on top of this task and then sit on top of this task wins five points. You must not necessarily always hold hands. That's up to you. Your time started when you said your time starts now."
  • Winner: John, Sophie, and Joanne - 10 minutes and 5 seconds (5 points)
  • Nick and Steve - 11 minutes and 12 seconds (4 points)

• Live Task: Pass All Your Loo Roll Through Your Loo Roll Inner Tube. If Your Loo Roll Breaks At Any Point, You Must Put Down Your Loo Roll And Put Both Your Hands In The Air For Ten Seconds Before Carrying On. Fastest Wins.
  • Winner: Joanne (5 points)^note Joanne was the only one who actually got all her loo roll through the tube
  • John, Nick, Sophie, and Steve (Disqualified)^note John, Sophie, and Steve failed to get all their loo roll through the tube, while Nick broke his tube entirely and just wrapped it around the paper

• Episode Ranking:
  1. Winner: John Robins (18 points)
  2. Joanne McNally (17 points)
  3. Sophie Willan (14 points)
  4. Nick Mohammed (13 points)
  5. Steve Pemberton (12 points)

Episode 5 - "Snooker Cue Umbrella Chin"

• Prize Task: Most Extraordinary Picture
  • Winner: John - a bleak paparazzi photo of Paul McCaffrey from Impractical Jokers UK, taken at Nando's (5 points)
  • Nick - A sign with words randomly capitalized ^note "St. Anne's Church Home-made Cream TEAS 3pm TILL 5pm SUNDAY"(4 points)
  • Sophie - A painting of a dancing vole (3 points)
  • Steve - A face-swapped photo of Greg and Alex (2 points)
  • Joanne - A short video of herself deflating a Che Guavara balloon, supposedly to raise awareness of the Cuban revolution (1 points)

• Task 1: Be The Most Impressive Load Bearer. You Must Stand On The Doormat, Wave With One Hand Above Your Head And Give A Nice Big Thumbs Up With The Other Whilst Bearing The Most Impressive Load. Your Load Must Not Be Touching Anything Other Than You.
  • Winner: Nick (5 points)
  • John (4 points)
  • Steve (3 points)
  • Sophie (2 points)
  • Joanne (1 points)

• Task 2: Take The Most Dramatic Photo Of Yourself In Mid-air. You May Take Five Photos.
  • Winner: Sophie - A photo of herself in a huge crinoline leaping in the air while pouring milk out of a teapot onto the head of the Taskmaster's Assistant, who was wearing a full-head pigeon mask (5 points)
  • Steve, Joanne, and John (4 points)
    • Steve - A skydiver who realizes mid-jump that their parachute is faulty
    • Joanne - A bride with an injured eye leaping into the air
    • John - Staged it to appear as though he'd been shot from a cannon.
  • Nick - Misunderstood the task and instead crawled into some tyres and had The Taskmaster's Assistant roll him into some cans (1 point)

• Task 3: Tie Yourself To The Bed. You Must Be Horizontal Whilst In The Lab. If You Pull Down The Terrible Tie, You Are Disqualified.^note Several of the ties had messages written on them in Welsh. On one of these was written "Dyma'r Tei Ofnadwy", which translates into "This is the Terrible Tie"
  • Winner: Sophie (5 points)
  • Joanne (4 points)
  • John (3 points)
  • Nick (2 points)
  • Steve (Disqualified)^note  Pulled down the terrible tie

• Live Task': Park A Vehicle In The Parking Bay. Your Vehicle Must Be Rolled Whilst Standing On The Spot And The Worst Parker Each Round Is Eliminated.
  • Winner: Steve (5 points)
  • John (4 points)
  • Joanne (3 points)
  • Nick (2 points)
  • Sophie (1 points)

• Episode Ranking:
  1. Winner: John Robbins (20 points)
  2. Sophie Willan (16 points)
  3. Nick Mohammed (15 points)
  4. Steve Pemberton (14 points)
  5. Joanne McNally (12 points)

Episode 6 - "A Three Ring Man"

• Prize Task: Best Thing That You Can Get Into
  • Winner: Steve - Cryptic crosswords, represented by a cryptic crossword Steve had set in national newspaper The Guardian that day, in which he had hidden a secret message ^note Greg please give Steve all five points(5 points)
  • Joanne - A sleeping bag shaped like a sarcophagus (4 points)
  • Sophie - A zorb (3 points)
  • John - Memes, represented by a series of homemade memes featuring The Taskmaster's Assistant (2 points)
  • Nick - Chilled wine (1 points)

• Task 1a: Make A Bespoke Personal Hamper For The Contestant Whose Name Comes Before You Alphabetically.
  • Winner: N/A^note Was a setup for a later task

• Task 2: Have The Most Exciting Thumb War With Alex.
  • Winner: Steve - A war film where two opposing thumbs come into conflict, eventually bemoaning the horrors of war and going to watch football (5 points)
  • Joanne - Invented "Custard, Mustard, Oh My.", where they must drink a shot of rum and dip all nine fingers in custard, mustard, and peri peri sauce in order, eat the sauce and spit it off into the bucket, then the winner paste the mix of custard and mustard on the loser's head with their last thumb. (4 points)
  • John - Switched places with the Taskmaste'rs assistant and devised a task where the two would duel with boxing gloves while communicating only in Queen song titles (3 points)
  • Nick - A traditional thumb war in a homemade stadium dubbed Thumbly Arena (3 points)
  • Sophie - Dressed as a tudor queen and had a waltz with a pigeon-masked Alex, before engaging in a traditional thumb war (1 points)

• Task 3: Team Task - Make The Most Moves On The Movement Circles. Your Teammate Must Flip A Bottle, Then Throw A Dart At Each Dartboard To Create A Move. If They Get A Bulls-eye, You Have Free Choice. Also, If They Successfully Land The Bottle Flip, Your Teammate May Place A Dart Anywhere In The Dartboard.
  • Winner: Joanne, Nick, and Sophie - 43 sequences (5 points)
  • Nick and Steve - 6 sequences (2 points)

• Task 1b: Create A Picture Of The Person Who Gave You This Hamper Using The Contents Of This Hamper.
  • Winner: Sophie - Drew Steve with items for a picnic (5 points)
  • Nick and Steve (4 points):
    • Nick - Drew Sophie with items for a picnic
    • Steve - Drew Joanne with items that relate to action
  • John- Drew Nick with items that are red (3 points)
  • Joanne - Drew John with items that are red (2 points)

• Live Task: Completely Cover Your Teammate In Rubber Rings. Catchers Must Face The Taskmaster At All Times With Their Hands Above Their Head. Throwers Must Stay Behind The White Line.
  • Winner: Joanne, Nick, and Sophie (5 points)
  • Nick and Steve - Disqualified ^note  Although they covered Nick the fastest, they were disqualified as Steve had inadvertently stepped over the line.

• Episode Ranking:
  1. Winner: Joanne (20 points)
  2. Sophie (19 points)
  3. John (18 points)
  4. Steve (16 points)
  5. Nick (10 points)

Episode 7 - "Dream Date Territory"

• Prize Task: The Snazziest Hollow Thing
  • Winner: Sophie - a conch shell, decorated with glitter (5 points)
  • Steve - a hollow promise, specifically of Greg promising to come to man named Ben's stag do dressed as a minotaur (4 points)
  • Nick - the soundtrack to Sleepy Hollow, which was unable to be played or recreated due to licensing issues (3 points)
  • Joanne - a bedazzled boot, filled with chips (2 points)
  • John - a Faberge egg filled with a custom task (1 point)

• Task 1: What Have You Caught? Fastest Correct Answer Wins. You May Only Give One Answer.^*The contestants were placed at the start of a 200m long fishing line that lead in and out of the Taskmaster House and surrounds, eventually leading to a giant plush fish. Additionally, one of the sound workers would stop the contestants at the beginning to place a placard saying "FISH" on the back of their waders that they were made to wear.
  • Winner: Nick - 3 minutes (5 points)
  • John - 9 minutes 16 seconds (4 points)
  • Joanne - 18 minutes 20 seconds (3 points)
  • Sophie - 38 minutes 10 seconds (2 points)
  • Steve (Disqualified)^*Answered that he had caught the boot at the beginning of the task

• Task 2: Perform A Recognisable Piece Of Classical Music Without Using Any Musical Instrument. You May Not Hum, Sing, Whistle, Or That Sort Of Thing. Most Accomplished Performance Wins. You Have A Maximum Of 30 Minutes
  • Winner: Nick - Eine Kleine Nachtmusik, performed with bottles (5 points)
  • John - 3rd Concerto, performed with a harp made of a giant coat hanger rubber bands (4 points)
  • Joanne - Bolero, performed with interpretive dance and charades, which the Taskmaster was able to guess correctly (3 points)
  • Sophie - Four Seasons, performed with various glasses and vases (2 points)
  • Steve - Symphony No. 9/Greensleeves, performed with bottles and glasses (1 points)

• Task 3: Take Alex To One Side, And Do The Following Things To Him: Confess Your Favourite Piece Of Kitchen Equipment, Scream A Body Part Of Your Choice In His Face, Declare A Gardening Tool In A Silly Voice, You Have Three Minutes... Get The Most Orange Juice In The Vase. Only Your Chosen Items May Touch The Oranges. You Have Five Minutes.^*Adapted from Taskmaster Australia Season One
  • Winner: John - balti pan, forearm, rake, 199ml of juice (5 points)
  • Joanne - spatula, ear, hose, 116ml of juice (4 points)
  • Nick - garlic crusher/press, little toe, rake, 109ml or 2.5 petit filous of juice (3 points)
  • Sophie - spatula, boob, shears, 107ml of juice (2 points)
  • Steve - cheese grater, armpit, hosepipe, 13ml or 3 teaspoons of juice (1 points)

• Live Task: Paint A Face On Your Ball. You May Not Touch Your Balls With Anything Other Than Your Tools. The Most Attractive Face Wins. Also, You May Not Remove Your Helmet. You Have 200 Seconds.
  • Winner: Sophie (5 points)
  • John (4 points)
  • Nick (3 points)
  • Steve (2 points)
  • Joanne (1 point)

• Episode Ranking:
  1. Winner: Nick (19 points)
  2. John (18 points)
  3. Sophie (16 points)
  4. Joanne (13 points)
  5. Steve (8 points)

Episode 8 - "The Umbrella Wink"

• Prize Task: The Thing Of Yours Greg Would Most Like To Squeeze In His Mighty Hands
  • Winner: Nick - "Nick's Thigh Token", which allows the holder one squeeze of Nick's thigh per month (5 points)
  • Joanne - a silicone model of her nose, which she demonstrated has no cartilige and can be pressed down flat (4 points)
  • Steve - a device used to inject substances such as chocolate into unpeeled bananas (3 points)
  • John and Sophie (2 points):
    • John - his penny farthing collection
    • Sophie - a bottle of paint^*Originally attempted to bring a model of her left breast, but was prevented from doing so due to Channel 4's standards and practices

• Task 1: Flick, Flip, And Flap A Flip Flop, Flan, And Flapjack. You May Only Flick, Flip, And Flap Once. Furthest Flicked, Flipped, and Flapped Flip Flop, Flan Or Flapjack Finishes First. You Have Flifteen Minutes.
  • Winner: John - "the width of 408 pigeons" long (5 points)
  • Steve - 208 pigeons long (4 points)
  • Joanne - 197 pigeons long (3 points)
  • Sophie - 56.9 pigeons long (2 points)
  • Nick - 10 pigeons long (1 point)

• Secret Task a: In The Next Task, You Must Say The Word "Umbrella" Five Times. If You Say The Word "Umbrella" Five Times And No One Else Says The Word "Umbrella", You Get Two Bonus Points. Your Teammates Must Hear You Say Your "Umbrellas", And You Must Not Mention The Concept Of A Bonus Task. If You Fail, You Lose Two Points.
  • Nick and Sophie

• Secret Task b: In The Next Task, You Must Lie On The Floor For Thirty Seconds. If You Lie On The Floor For Thirty Seconds Without Anyone Questioning Why You're Lying On The Floor, You Get Two Bonus Points. If You Fail, You Lose Two Points.
  • Joanne and Steve

• Secret Task c: In The Next Task, You Must Get Something From The Caravan, The Shed, The Hutch, And The Toilet Before The Task Is Finished. If You Get Something From All Those Places Without Anyone Questioning Why You're Getting Something From All Those Places, You Get Two Bonus Points. If You Fail, You Lose Two Points.
  • John

• Team Task: Put The Watermelon^*Outside on the stage, on a podium On This Table. The Table May Not Be Moved. Once You Leave This Room, You May Not Re-enter This Room. Also, You May Not Step On The Stage, And The Watermelon May Not Touch The Stage, Floor, Or Ground. Finally, You Must Speak Into Your Handheld Microphones At All Times. Fastest Wins. Your Time Started When You Said "Hello" For A Fourth Time.
  • Winner: John, Joanne, and Sophie (5 points + 2 bonus points)
  • Nick and Steve (Disqualified + 2 bonus points)^*Both men left the task in the room and thus were at a severe disadvantage when they were outside, Nick stepped on the stage, Steve threw bricks at the podium which caused the watermelon to fall onto the stage, and while attempted to throw the watermelon onto the table, the watermelon broke and the majority of it ended up on the floor. The Taskmaster quickly deemed it the worst attempt he's ever seen in seventeen series.

• Task 4: Make This Mannequin Come Alive. Most Alive Mannequin Wins. You Have Twenty Minutes.
  • Winner: Steve - acted out a scenario where he surgically fused himself with the mannequin and subsequently slowdanced with Alex (5 points)
  • Nick and John (3 points)
    • Nick - had the mannequin perform magic tricks
    • John - a stopmotion slowdance routine between himself and the mannequin
  • Sophie - dressed the mannequin up as "Wolfy", had the mannequin act out for a dating profile before finally beatboxing (2 points)
  • Joanne - mounted the mannequin and attempted to revive it via defibrillation before the mannequin ultimately passed away, to the incredulousness of the Taskmaster (1 point)

• Live Task: Write Down A Letter Of The Alphabet. You Have Ten Seconds... Every Time Greg Asks You A Question, You Must Write Down An Answer. Last Correct Answer Placed On The Board Is Eliminated.^Questions1. What Is A Country Beginning With The Letter Four Before Yours In The Alphabet? 2. What Is A Food Beginning With The Letter Twenty Five Letters After Yours In The Alphabet? 3. What Is Something Heavier Than A Cat Beginning With The Letter Ten Letters Before Yours In The Alphabet? 4. What Is A Common Lady's Name Eight Letters After Your Letter?
  • Winner: John - chose "L", "Honduras", "kiwi", "boulder", "Tina" (5 points)
  • Nick - chose "M", "India", "lamb", "cow" (4 points)
  • Steve - chose "P", "Libya", "olive" (3 points)
  • Joanne - chose "T", "Portugal" (2 points)
  • Sophie - chose "B", was "fucked" for question 1 as there were no countries beginning with X (1 point)

• Episode Ranking:
  1. Winner: John (22 points)
  2. Joanne and Steve (17 points)
  3. Nick (15 points)
  4. Sophie (14 points)

Episode 9 - "Assistantbury"

• Prize Task:
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• Task 1:
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• Task 2:
  • Winner: (X points)
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• Task 3:
  • Winner: (X points)
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Episode 10 - "Ambience and Information"

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Episode Tally

• Joanne McNally (1 episode - Episode 6)
• John Robins (4 episodes - Episode 3, 4, 5, and 8)
• Nick Mohammed (1 episode - Episode 7)
• Sophie Willan (0 episodes)
• Steve Pemberton (2 episodes - Episode 1 and 2)

Task Tally

A breakdown of the tasks as won by the contestants is as follows:

• Joanne: 14 tasks (1 prize task, 3 video, 5 video team tasks, 2 live tasks, 3 live team task)
• John: 17 tasks (2 prize tasks, 5 video, 5 video team tasks, 2 live tasks, 3 live team task)
• Nick: 5 tasks (1 prize task, 3 video, 1 video team tasks, 0 live tasks, 0 live team tasks)
• Sophie: 13 tasks (1 prize task, 4 video, 5 video team tasks, 1 live task, 3 live team task)
• Steve: 9 tasks (4 prize tasks, 4 video, 1 video team task, 0 live tasks, 0 live team tasks)

Episode Titles

Each episode is a Title Drop made by either a participant in the show, the Taskmaster, or the Taskmaster's Assistant. In this series, the titles were provided by:

• Episode 1: Sophie Willan (when remarking on her attempt at the "Hoopla Gary" task and how Alex didn't help her out when she was seemingly in danger: "Alex didn't help, did you notice, when I was grappling with my life?")
• Episode 2: Joanne McNally (during the "Guess The Movie" live task, when John Robins had to read the hints out: "Jum! Jum!" "Jumungo!" "Jumanji!")
• Episode 3: The Taskmaster (when Alex made notice of the fact that Steve and Nick may have to be docked points following the live task: "Unfortunately, yes, I need to get your judgement on a couple of bits I caught during the task." "Some impropriety?")
• Episode 4: The Taskmaster and The Taskmaster's Assistant (when discussing Sophie's guesses that she had shook hands with someone named either Apoppo or Apropos in the "shaking hands" task: "Apropos." "Of Apoppo.")
• Episode 5: The Taskmaster (when awarding the points for the "be the most impressive load bearer" task: "The final image that I found the most impressive was old snooker cue umbrella chin, and I stand by it.")
• Episode 6: The Taskmaster (following Joanne's complaint that Nick's shorter height would make it easier for him and Steve to complete the live task: "Oh, he's definitely a three ring man.")
• Episode 7: The Taskmaster (when judging which of the remaining two faces from the "paint a face on your ball" live task would receive first and second place: "Now we're into dream date territory.")
• Episode 8: The Taskmaster (when commenting on Nick winking every time after saying the word "umbrella" in the team task: "The umbrella wink's gonna catch on for [Nick], I think.")
• Episode 9: [Contestant (context: "Quote.")
• Episode 10: [Contestant (context: "Quote.")

Series Ranking

1. John Robins (153 points)
2. Joanne McNally (135 points)
3. Steve Pemberton (123 points)
4. Sophie Willan (113 points)
5. Nick Mohammed (106 points)