Moments pages are Spoilers Off.
Episode 1: Prologue
- The beginning of the episode is full of funny moments during the new girl's tour. Highlights include:
- Him telling the newbie to never turn off her radio, only for someone else to immediately say they couldn't find him, because his radio was turned off.
- When the newbie mentions that she's going to be a botanist, the other guy says:"Botanist, huh? Well, I've never much trusted robots myself, but that's just because I grew up in the South."
- The response when she mentions that she brought along some books on tape:"Books on tape? What's the appeal of that? Don't the pages get stuck together?"
- Dylan gets into a secure military facility by using 'confusing acronyms', which start out sounding official, but end up devolving into well known ones such as AOL and FUBAR.
- Near the end when the cameraman, who has remained silent the whole time, is questioned, Dylan responds he's French and speaks no English. Cameraman's response? "Oui."
- Dylan's Leaning on the Fourth Wall debate with Carlos about how certain people have been getting bored with the Reds and Blues, and that Dylan should do a story on "those monster-fighting sexy teenagers". It sounds like a typical argument between two fans. Made even better by how many viewers instead took it as a reference to the recently released Power Rangers film.
- Dylan's caller ID apparently has her supervisor Carlos listed as "Grouchy McBossypants".
Episode 2: The Chronicle
- Jax is this during his premiere in episode 2. From beat-boxing the classic RvB theme, to his half-incompetent camerawork, to his insane camera angle and movie plot ideas. Most of the episodes humor either comes from or directly involves him.
- "I'm pretty sure we can use that tank as a dolly!"
- The return of Sister.Dylan: I know there's a story here, but I still got too many holes to fill.
Sister: I don't know how that's going to help your story, but I feel another bi phase coming on, and the camera guy's already here, so let's do this thing!
Dylan: Great! [Beat] Wait, what? - "Hey, you know my name! BIG FUCKIN' DEAL! GET OFF MY BASE!"
- Sister talks about what she's been up to, but Dylan wants to go back to talking about the Reds and Blues.Jax: Oop— There goes the Bechdel Test.
- Dylan makes the mistake of mentioning Occam's Razor to Sister:Sister: Occam can go suck himself! This is some conspiracy shit! Like, what if it's a government thing?! Jet fuel can't JFK the moon landing!
Dylan: (her and Jax glance at each other) That's an... interesting angle.
Sister: (excitedly) *gasp* You should interview the Illuminati! - Vic's desire to die crosses so many lines it becomes hilarious. Especially given how he keeps going back and forth on pretending he's joking. And it's made even better when Jax laments that he's sounding "[just] like Grandma."
- The Leaning on the Fourth Wall continues in this episode where Vic mentions he recorded all of Blood Gulch and cut them up into 100 five minute long sections for convenience's sake.
Episode 3: The Mother of Destruction
- Jax also insists that "shaky cam" will make the situation more realistic. The situation being that they are actually getting shot at for real.
- "Unicorn Soldier" saves Dylan and Jax and is fixing to leave, but before he can go, Dylan wants his name:Unicorn Soldier: Goodbye.
Jax: Weird name. "Hello, Goodbye!" "You're leaving?" "Why no, Goodbye! I just got here!" - Dylan wants to fire Jax after he missed a critical shot, Jax points out he also pushed her out of the way of a bullet. He declares they're "even stevens".
Episode 4: Chorus Lessons
- Andersmith's Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness now that he's a cop, which is getting on Bitters' last nerve. When Bitters tells Andersmith he doesn't even sound like a cop, Andersmith insists he's going by the book: Law & Order. Bitters doesn't respond well to this.
- A major factor in Jax continuing to help Dylan now that they're going rogue? Once he gets back home, his student loans kick in.
- Dylan finally reaching the Reds and Blues is played as a Shout-Out to the end of The Force Awakens, with Caboose standing in for Luke. And then he's freaked out to see Dylan behind him and falls over the cliff.Dylan: ...Fuck.
Episode 5: Previously On
- When Dylan tries telling the other Reds and Blues about Caboose falling off a cliff, she finds everyone's a little... distracted. Sarge is driving his jeep off of cliffs, Grif and Tucker are arguing over band names, and Simmons is running around babbling.Dylan: Listen, everyone! I have no idea what the fuck you're all doing, but you need to know your man Caboose is terribly injured and possibly dead!
Caboose: (Off-Screen) Oh no! Not Caboose! (Camera pans to show he's right next to Dylan) We need to go rescue him!
Dylan: You— you're okay?
Caboose: Oh, yeah. You know, I fell down and stuff, but, you know, I landed on my head and that's okay because that's the part that's most used to it. So, yeah, I'm fine, things are good now. I'm gonna go lie down now. - Donut is naked half of the episode. Thankfully, he's off-screen until he puts his armor back on.
- The entire episode is essentially a recap of all the hilarious shit the Blood Gulch Crew went through after having saved Chorus. To wit:
- After capturing Hargrove, Tucker activated the Temple of Procreation to celebrate. Apparently, Grif and Simmons were trapped in a closet together during that time. Furthermore, they both refuse to talk about before refusing to meet each other's eyes. During the whole time, the only one who didn't feel different was Tucker. Wash wasn't surprised.
- Sarge was hopelessly depressed after not having died heroically on Chorus (he definitely did not say so verbatim), and started looking for a new enemy.
- Carolina had a difficult time getting used to inaction, so she tried to get help from Grif in a Shout-Out to The Empire Strikes Back.Carolina: Help me, Grif. Teach me how to be the best at being lazy.
Grif: (who is sitting with his legs crossed and hands outstretched as if meditating) You're not ready yet, Padawan.
Carolina: I can try!
Grif: (solemnly) No. There is no try. - They found out that their new island was home to dinosaurs. While they debated on whether or not being eaten by dinosaurs was ironic, Caboose managed to make friends with them. "Because of course he did."
- Donut accidentally burned down their new bases with his vanilla-scented candles.
- Due to having lost nearly all of their food, Grif started looking for native plants to eat. The mushrooms he found were essentially, as described by Simmons, "crystal meth on crystal meth".
- Simmons spent his summer learning Esperanto, a dead language, thinking that it was Spanish for "Spanish".
- Freckles has a new body! Except it's a literal toy. Freckles' voice is appropriately high pitched and he occasionally goes on "rampages" where the only "casualty" is Caboose playing dead.
- After selling their movie rights, they built the galaxy's greatest water park. Wash joined in with the others as they jumped in happiness while Carolina simply gave a deadpan expression of joy. And Donut later burned it down, much to Grif's great dismay and confusion.
- It's worth noting that the scene is largely sold by Geoff Ramsey's utterly hate-filled delivery of "AND THEN DONUT-", which in turn is then immediately followed by a Smash Cut to Donut burning down the water park.
- What makes it even better is Donut's following explanation:
Donut: One, lube isn't normally flammable! And B, I didn't burn down the whole water park, just the park part! - Tucker, Caboose and Grif all tried to form a band together, but couldn't agree on a band name (all of which were punny versions of real-world bands with "blue" or "red" thrown in). Carolina tried to join in. Apparently, she's a terrible singer, though no one dares tell her out of fear.Grif: Can you sing, though?
Carolina: [with dramatic closeup] Can I sing?
[Back to the present]
Tucker: [unenthused] Carolina sings... so good.
Carolina: [pleased] Thank you!
Simmons: [laughs nervously] Oh, and we're definitely not just saying that 'cause she could kill us!
Grif: [pained] So... good! - Sarge tried to build his own enemy and made a robot army, but it malfunctioned and attacked the dinosaurs (offscreen, of course). Wash says it was the greatest thing he ever saw.
- Grif convinced Simmons that Game of Thrones really happened. Carolina describes this as one of the highlights of the ten months of shenanigans they were engaged in, and one can hear her holding back a laugh as she recounts it. Even better, a flashback shows that Grif only needed to convince Simmons of this by repeating "Yeah, way" enough times.Simmons: That... sounds... awesome! Man, I'm gonna go visit!note
- Desperately in search of a new enemy, Sarge tried to take the fight to gravity itself. It resulted in the Reds losing their jeep after Sarge drove it over a ledge.Sarge: Suck it, Newton!
- Special mention should also be given to Wash and Carolina's reactions to Sarge charging right off a cliff on a Warthog (with Lopez in tow, naturally). One gets the idea that if they weren't the Team Dad and Team Mom before this point, they certainly are now.Carolina: [wearily] Are we really going to let this play out?
Wash: [genuinely amused] Why not see where it goes?
- Special mention should also be given to Wash and Carolina's reactions to Sarge charging right off a cliff on a Warthog (with Lopez in tow, naturally). One gets the idea that if they weren't the Team Dad and Team Mom before this point, they certainly are now.
- To stave off yet another war between the two teams following Sarge's aforementioned destruction of the Red Team's Warthog, the Reds and Blues tried to put in place a new form of government. Proposals included: Anarchynote , monarchy-through-swordnote , military dictatorshipnote , matriarchynote and malarkeynote . When Simmons tried to explain that malarkey wasn't a form of government, but a term for meaningless talk and nonsense, he then trailed off as everyone silently realized that description actually summed up the Blood Gulch Crew just fine.Wash: Malarkey won.
- Caboose somehow ended up in the Upside-Down from Stranger Things. The gang tried to communicate with him through the same alphabet-and-Christmas-lights method... but since it's Caboose, it didn't really work.Washington: "Neat." He just keeps saying "Neat."
- After finding Donut apparently dead, Grif, Simmons and Tucker buried him in an unmarked grave. Except he wasn't dead, and was just skinny dipping not far away. Everyone reacted to seeing Donut naked the same way they reacted to killer dinosaurs.
- "Wash. Grew. A beard." Carolina (and quite a few commenters) makes it sound like the greatest thing ever, while Wash just thought it was itchy. And we, the audience, of course can't see any difference because of the 24-Hour Armor. This also shows that Carolina has finally succumbed and become just as crazy as the rest of them. Doubles as heartwarming.
- That very morning, Grif spiked Simmons' food with his "meth-meth shrooms" For the Lulz.
- The punchline to all of the above is great too. Dylan asks Jax if he got all of that. He assures her that he did, and only then does he start recording.
- Grif's reaction to the message from Church, knowing that this is the start of another adventure:Grif: God fucking dammit.
Episode 6: Reacts
- Jax offering up the MST3K-esque concept of "Cosmoknight" - where a Russian cosmonaut from The '60s crashlands at an American Renaissance fair and thinks he's gone back in time - when Dylan asks him for a movie idea since she needed it to look like they were busy and so the Blues would invite them to go with them. Jax then offers up another idea, but Dylan rejects it as "Cosmoknight" is still "lodged in my head like a stupidity bullet."
- When Jax notices Grif enter the cave, angrily muttering about the Church situationnote , what is his response?
- Sarge getting Lopez, Simmons, and Donut to howl and bark like dogs because of the coming "dogs of war." Jax, who was sent to check up on them, is appropriately baffled.
- Sarge's nonsensical rant against the "Whites". Specifically, those that wear white armor, like the Meta and Wyoming.
- Carolina bemoaning that she thought they'd already reached "peak moron" when Jax randomly quotes Blade Runner. Cue Sarge and Simmons immediately running up beside her, the former continuing his rant. And then the image atop this page happens ("Who wants a poisoned pumpkin frappuccino? ") and she dejectedly goes "I'm gonna shut up now".
- Sarge is very skeptical of Wash telling him that they're going to be working together with Dylan and Jax so as to find Church.Sarge: Red, White, and Blue working together? How absolutely un-American!
- Despite the scene being largely a Tear Jerker, Grif's conversation with the rest of the Blood Gulch Crew at the end of the episode leads to him complaining that "Church's died more times than Jean Grey. It's getting old."
Episode 7: Nightmare on Planet Evil
- Caboose at one point had a Bop-It. He bopped it against a rock and now it's "sleeping". In teeny tiny pieces.
- Sarge has gone without sleep for about five days, a reference to another Rooster Teeth production. Jax calls the premise of "sleep is death" weak. Becomes even funnier if you know that Burnie Burns was the one who came up with the premise.
- Jax attempting to scare Tucker by running around the abandoned city - which is depicted as "Deadite cam." Tucker casually trips him and knocks him unconscious - which Jax describes as "Groovy."
- While Caboose and Simmons' talk about death is initially pretty sad, it does give us this golden line from Caboose after Simmons claims that ghosts and resurrection are scientifically impossible:Simmons: (confused) that's... math... ...I guess...?
- We cut to the FOTUS Soldier standing over what appears to be the dead bodies of Sarge, Simmons, and Caboose after getting a distressing call from Caboose, and you assume the worst, especially with the eerie scream heard in the background, followed by a well-timed thunderclap. Turns out Sarge had finally passed out from lack of sleep (while having a dream of a deported Lopez), Simmons saw a snake (a small one at that) and fainted, and Caboose got scared and decided to play dead ("Is the bad man gone yet?"). Our heroes, everybody!
- Y'know that ultra-scary soldier the reporters met in Episode 3? The guy who's looking for Tucker? He's actually just a Chorusan civil servant named Spencer Porkensenson. What he was really trying to do is serve Tucker a class-action suit for child-support payments. Turns out activating the Temple of Procreation on Chorus resulted in a lot of illegitimate kids that Tucker's the father of. Tucker appropriately seems very upset, giving off a Big "NO!" afterwards. At the episode's end, he's just lying around the ship, no longer enthused about finding Church.
- After the FOTUS Soldier leaves, Jax reveals that he edited some clips to make a snappy 70's-themed title sequence for himnote ;Jax: So, constructive feedback? I'm thinkin' about pitchin' this to some networks when we get back.
Dylan: How did you get him [the FOTUS Soldier] to sign a release form?
Jax: ...A what-now?
Episode 8: A Fistful of Colors
- Turns out the impostors are more sim Troopers, who are a Similar Squad to the Reds and Blues, and at least as quirky as they are, if not more.
- A particular highlight is when Surge and Sarge debate who's in charge (turns out Surge is also a Colonel, somehow) and settle it with Rock Paper Scissors (or as they call it, "Procedure").
- The mere fact that Simmons's equivalent is named Gene.
- Moreso, Caboose's equivalent is named Loconote , Tucker's is named Buckynote , Donut's is Cronutnote , and Lopez's is called Lorenzonote .
- Any time with Caboose interacting with Loco is just hilarious in that they practically share the same mind.
- Additionally, both Simmons and Gene agree that "err" is a real word, with Tucker and Bucky both insisting that it's not at the exact same time.
- After the Reds and Blues and the Blues and Reds have collectively taken down the fighter crafts sent by the UNSC, Surge reports that Lopez and Lorenzo were dismembered during the fight, with the two robots once again reduced to heads.
Episode 9: Rigged
- Dylan's attempt to interview Sarge fails horribly, partially because of Sarge's own ridiculous paranoia but also because he spills that Temple told him to find out what she knew in a screw up of an I Know You Know I Know moment.
- Tucker getting annoyed by the Similar Squad routine. When he tries to angrily storm off, he ends up mistaking Gene for Simmons, and when corrected, grumbles, "Just help me with my dramatic exit." He also complains that having Gene and Simmons close by means that "I have to hear this shit in stereo now!"
- Loco turns out to be a serious Genius Ditz with engineering, and gives a stream of incomprehensible Technobabble that confuses even Simmons.
- Donut and Cronut's innuendo-laden conversation about Russian novelists and philosophers.
- Doc is back...and he immediately makes a hurricane of analogies about how more superior the Blues and Reds are to the Reds and Blues. Donut even joins in. Jax also "helps" Doc in this endeavor, claiming that if the Blues and Reds are "Spider-Man," then the Reds and Blues are "Turkish Spider-Man."Doc: They are the ding-dongs, and you are the dildos!
Episode 10: Battlescars
- Wash comes up with a plan to lure the people killing Freelancers into a trap by activating Carolina's recovery beacon. How does he express this to her? By telling her to take off her armor. Seeing as how this came after a tender moment, Carolina is appropriately shocked. Even better, after his explanation, Carolina agrees to remove her armor. But Wash continues to stare at her forcing her to make him turn around.
- Remember how Carolina had a horrible singing voice and the guys were too afraid to tell her? Turns out she's well aware, she just liked watching them squirm. When she admits it, Wash jokingly tells her that she really is evil.
- When the Blues and Reds shows up with the Blood Gulch Crew, Wash describes it as the worst possible that could happen, beating the likes of mercs and space pirates.
- Wash's first idea of what the doubles mean is that Sarge created robotic duplicates of themselves. Carolina sounds appropriately exasperated when she wants to know what's going on.
- Apparently ever since the Reds and Blues have joined the Blues and Reds in their underwater lair— er, base, they've been having fish for every meal. The Blood Gulch Crew are understandably fed up.
Episode 11: Belly of the Beast
- When Dylan's hiding spot is nearly found by Temple and Loco, she leaves a small green spartan teddy. Loco asks Temple if he should arrest it.
- Part of the reason Tucker doesn't suspect the many locked doors is because he thinks people could steal his possessions, or walk into his "masturbatorium".
- Everything about Sarge's "audition", which eventually degrades (even further) from a bunch of random action movie dialouge to him shouting random movie titles... Including Lazer Team 2, which Jax dosen't think is real.
- The files on Temple's computer include a folder named "Buckey PRIVATE", and his most recent internet hits include "metafores", "Shakesphere monologues", "evil lairs for dummies" and "How to villain".
- Dylan promises to fulfill Vic's wish for death under the condition of doing her three favors:Vic: Ho ho. Well. Your wish is my command, duderino! This genie is poppin' off the bottle and ready to roll! Watchya need?
Dylan: I need access to this computer. Can you hack into it?
Vic: Donezo! Wait! Little reminder, dudette. You've got three little wishes before you have to control-alt-delete me! Off the face of reality! That was the deal.
Dylan: Yeah, yeah, I haven't forgotten.
Vic: Yeah. And this is wish number...uh, wish number...seems I've got a little gap in the memory circuits. A little uh, erase-a in the cabeza. Ugh, wish number...
Dylan: Wish number two.
Vic: Right! Haha! This is wish number dos! You promised, duderino! I don't wanna stand up my date with death. We're takin' the river styx to Disneyland! I'm doin' shots with Anubis, dude! I'm playin' twister with the reaper!
Dylan: Keep your voice down!
Episode 12: Blue vs. Red
- When Gene and Cronut run out of ammo, they resort to taunting to defeat the enemy. They're not very good at it.Gene: You suck! You're... bad at math!
Cronut: You have table manners that leave much to be desired!
Gene: You smell like maybe you forgot to wear deodorant today!
Cronut: Your mother's lasagna is- mediocre! - Temple and his men capture Lorenzo, his threat attempts keep coming off as unintentionally racist such as threatening to stomp the Goomba, you know, like Mario.
- Temple and Biff discussing what place to shoot [mBiff so he can leave with a medical discharge.Biff: The butt? Are you insane? That's right next to my jingo jangos, okay? Bullets splinter.
Temple: How about the arm?
Biff: Arteries.
Temple: Ooh, the ear!
Biff: "What? Yeah, I can't hear you because some idiot shot my ear off." No way! (growls in frustration) There's got to be some part of the body that's expendable!
Temple: You just need to get shot in the appendix.
Biff: If only I was a book.
Episode 13: Blue vs. Red - Part 2
- When told she's going on a mission with the simulation troopers, Carolina vehemently insists she would never be on a mission with those simulation idiots.
- When she gets to Blue Base, Carolina finds that to keep the Reds from finding their flag, the Blue Team buried it, then lost the map. Since they need both flags to win the "war", Loco made a new flag from a stick and blue briefs.
- The Blues and Reds all watch the fight between Tex and Carolina they decide to put their own soundtrack to it. Things like high action music, Bruce Springsteen, and a Harry Potter audio book of all things.
- There's also the fact that when the fight begins, the background music shuts off. And we mean completely. Then, this exchange happens while the Blues and Reds watch the fight:Biff: Holy mother of awesome. Look at them.
Buckey: Yo, Reds! Are we still fighting, or- oh, holy shit!
Surge: ...All right, men, new plan! Let those two pummel each other to death!
Temple: The only thing that would make this better is some music!
Biff: Oh! I got it. I just upgraded the base's sound system. Okay, Shelly, play "Action Mix"!- Even better, their change in soundtrack actually affects the fight, with the two combatants noticeably changing speed and fighting style to fit the soundtrack to the point where Carolina tells them to cut it out. Then Loco has the base play his Harry Potter audiobook.
Episode 14: True Colors
- The beginning of the episode has Loco and Caboose talking about Loco's mysterious invention. Eventually, it gets onto the topic of where exactly Loco learned to be a Mad Scientist:Caboose: Oh, so you didn't have to go to school for any this?
Loco: [chuckles] No, I was actually Raised by Wolves! In the forest! Heh. They were much more into homeschooling.- There's also the conversation right beforehand in which Loco is trying to explain the time travel-elements of his invention to Caboose, and Caboose being... well, Caboose, completely fails to get it at all. It's made especially funny in that even though the two simulation troopers basically share the same personality, Loco is getting audibly frustrated by Caboose Comically Missing the Point.
- Lopez wearily asking "Why couldn't I have been born a Roomba?" after he's used as an ersatz psychotherapist by first Sarge, then Simmons, and even Donut despite the fact that all but the latter can't understand what he's saying.
- After comparing notes and deciding that the Blues and Reds are suspect, Tucker decides to use subtlety to figure out their intentions. Cue the Gilligan Cut:Tucker: Are you guys bad guys?
Temple: Well, that's all a matter of perspective, isn't it, Tucker?
Tucker: Ha! Gotcha! That's exactly the kind of thing bad guys say! ...Oh, holy shit, you're really bad guys, aren't you?- This scene also has Tucker dismissing Sarge's claim that fighting a Hopeless War is "what we've always wanted!", instead claiming that what he's always wanted is "a pair of Scandinavian twin sisters in a waterbed."
- The glorious return of the Battle Creek Zealots!
- Caboose completely blowing Simmons' attempt to be a mole in less than a minute flat.
- A mix of this and Moment of Awesome, but when the Reds and Blues (minus Sarge and Doc) get cornered, they attach Lopez's head to a missile and launch it, hoping he'll send reinforcements to help.Lopez: (as the missile ascends) Shhhiiiiittt.
Episode 15: Objects in Space
- Episode 15's opening scene is a massive spoof of the opening stinger to Star Trek: The Next Generation, with Lopez starring as both the narrator and the ship in question.Lopez: Space, the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Lopez. Its continuing mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out life and new civilizations, to boldly go... where no robot has gone before.
Starring LOPEZ THE HEAVY as Lopez La Pesado- It becomes even funnier when one remembers that in Episode 8, Lopez previously told Sarge he couldn't provide any intelligence on Desert Gulch because he's not the Starship Enterprise. Well, now...
- Immediately after that, Lopez is caught in a bright light and pulled into a ship. He asks what happened and who's there. Locus then deactivates his camo right next to him. Lopez's response?Lopez: Ayuda.
- Grif has gone full Cast Away, painting several balls with the helmets of the Reds and Blues and doing impressions of them to play out their typical drama. He even taught himself Spanish for Lopez's lines, which comes in handy when Locus arrives with Lopez.
- Special mention goes to Grif's lines for Caboose, which almost sound even more ridiculous than what he would actually say.Grif!Caboose: He's dead! My best friend is dead! Purple pineapple random nonsense bahahgaghahah...[Later]Grif!Caboose: It's too late, it's over. I'm sad now and forever. There's nothing you can do about it, kangaroo banana kangaroo, my heart's in a pouch!
- Special mention goes to Grif's lines for Caboose, which almost sound even more ridiculous than what he would actually say.
- Granted, it doubles as Nightmare Fuel somewhat, but Locus makes his presence known by saying point blank what Grif currently is.Grif: (to the volleyballs) Shut up, and listen to me! Everyone, I am so, so...
Locus: Completely insane. (Grif turns to look at a newly parked spaceship... whereupon Locus deactivates his camo) I would know. - Part of realizing Locus is real involves Grif grabbing him by the helmet. The fact that it's Locus on the receiving end makes it even more hilarious.
- Later when he's trying to prove he's not crazy, he turns around to ask the Doc volleyball, only to find it's gone.Grif: Well, that's Doc for you, am I right?
- When mentioning how long he's been alone, Grif spouts out various measurements of time... including "fifteen seasons".
- Grif's incessant chatter once he finally has someone to talk to. One can tell Locus is finding the situation rather trying.Grif: Cool ship, by the way. I bet that's an awesome side story. Does it have a name? How about the Locus Pocus?
Grif: Do you have any brothers and sisters? Did you kill any of your brothers and sisters?
Grif: I thought I was going to go crazy for a while there, but I'm sane as a fiddle. (in a completely serious voice) How many people have you killed? (back to chipper) Where did you grow up?- As the fandom has noticed, Locus has gone from having a guy in orange who talked too much as his partner to having to partner up with... another guy in orange who talks too much. Poor guy just can't catch a break, can he?
Episode 16: Grif Does a Rescue
- Grif infiltrating the Blues and Reds' base Metal Gear style! Highlights include:
- Quoting "This is Snake to Big Boss. No sign of surveillance" (unaware that he's already been spotted on the security monitors).
- The Exclamation Point hovering over Grif's head as he spots a plate of fish.
- Him attempting to crawl through the ventilation shaft, only to get stuck with his legs sticking out and kicking like he's Winnie the Pooh.
- Though it's mixed with drama, the reveal of Church's true message being a desperate call to Command from the Blood Gulch days, pleading for them to send a plumber to fix a plumbing disaster.Church: Tucker and Caboose—eugh—they flushed a damn grenade down the shitter and it exploded!
- At the end of the episode, we see a still-frozen Wash and Carolina, complaining for pretty inane reasons - respectively, Wash not being able to scratch his nose and Carolina being stuck in a "goddamn yoga pose". Even better when you remember that a different Freelancer apparently ended up frozen mid-attack... which left him standing on one foot. Wash and Carolina probably got off easy compared to him.
Episode 17: Quicksave
- Wash is a liiiiittle out of it from starvation and dehydration after Locus rescues him and Carolina.Wash: (slurred) Well, as soon as this elevator stops, I'll be ready to kick ass and take names.
Locus: We're not in an elevator.
Wash: Oh, well, in that case, it's gonna be up to you three to save the day.
Carolina: Three?
Wash: Yeah! You, Locus, and Big Bird over there. (camera cuts to empty spot) What up, Big B!- And then, there's Locus claiming that he's taken up the oath to never kill again.Carolina: (skeptically) Wash, is it possible to hallucinate with your ears?
Wash: (looking to his side) I don't know, officer. I swear, I usually keep it in the glove box!
- And then, there's Locus claiming that he's taken up the oath to never kill again.
- Sarge tries to get Jax and Dylan to say that it was his plan all along to be a Fake Defector. First, he is very serious about it, and they don't really buy helping him... but then this happens.Sarge: Let me phrase this another way... (goes down on his knees) Pretty please with a cherry on top, tell the guys this was my plan all along, ohhhh... have mercy! Don't make me beg! You wouldn't like what it sounds like!
- After running into Locus and learning he's there to rescue the Blood Gulch Crew, Sarge insists on "proper procedure" to decide who leads the operation. Rock Paper Scissors. Imagining the look on Locus' face as he stares at Sarge constantly playing a one-sided game of Rock Paper Scissors in Stunned Silence is the bulk of the hilarity. You can almost hear him thinking "This is one of the people who took down Hargrove?" What makes it even better is the implication that Locus eventually went along with it.
- Locus can only take so much of the Reds and Blues' constant chatter, which results in him raising his voice to the highest octave we've ever heard from him up to this point:
- The reactions to Locus' jail break.Tucker: For the record, I hate this.
Grif: I dig this!
Locus: (with Caboose somehow managing to hug him) I hate this.- After Sarge's semi-touching apology to his friends for his Face–Heel Turn, Locus gets this gem while growing increasingly impatient with the Reds and Blues not following him out of the cellblock.
Locus: I, for one, believed every word and found that very moving, now CAN WE GO PLEASE?! - Grif and Simmons' heartfelt talk ends when they notice Jax slowly walking up to them.Grif: Uh, dude, what the fuck are you doing?
Jax: Don't mind me! I'm just getting into position for the kiss!
(Grif and Simmons look to each other for a moment)
Dylan: (returns to see Jax lying on the floor) What happened to him?
Grif: He slipped.
Episode 18: Desolation
- The reunion between the Reds and Blues and Vic.Dylan: Promise you won't kill me. Or him.
- Vic's description of the new UNSC headquarters' defenses, complete with a sketch of it done in Windows XP-era MS-Paint.Vic: Oh, this place is decked down like you wouldn't believe! Half a dozen checkpoints, shields, a battalion of troops stationed there, an entire fleet in orbit on the overhead! And... two hot tubs.
- How they figure out Temple's plan: they try thinking like "idiots" (a.k.a. the Blues and Reds). Cue everyone looking at Sarge and Caboose.Sarge: Why is everybody looking over here?
Episode 19: Red vs. Red
- To keep viewers from feeling sorry for the rest of the Blues and Reds' Grunts, the ones stationed outside are such immoral jerks that it Crosses the Line Twice.
- One Grunt makes an offensive comment about global warming, resulting in him getting shot by Tucker, run over by Sarge, and finally kicked by Grif in the balls.
- Grif using the Meth-Meth Shrooms to gain Flash-level Super-Speed powers and effortlessly take out most of the Grunts.
- As everyone else helps in the big battle, Caboose contributes by... tying enemy soldiers' shoelaces together. The extra-funny part is that it actually works! Afterwards, Caboose proceeds to duck-walk circles around Tucker and boast about his stealth skills.
- Tucker's method of dealing with an enemy tank is punching it over and over again. And it works. Eventually.
- Crossing over with Moment of Awesome, Jax helping distract a machine gun turret-equipped Lorenzo for Tucker...by insulting famous Italian filmmakers and shouting "Soccer is boring as fuck!". Which Lorenzo cries out as blasphemy before trying to kill Jax with the aforementioned tank.
Episode 20: Blue vs Blue
- The increasingly bizarre Rousing Speeches that Sarge and Tucker come up with. According to Carolina, the longest record for them is two hours.
- Owing to the time spent in Armor Lock, Carolina states that she'll need to "take it easy" to remain okay. As soon as they enter the base proper we get a standard awesome Carolina scene of her using Caboose as a springboard to dispatch two of the Blue Zealots who had snuck up behind them... which smoothly transitions to her collapsing to the ground while Tucker snarks about how she is "taking it easy". Carolina, unamused, just asks for a hand up.
- A huge dose of Black Comedy goes down when Surge is gradually brought around to Sarge's line of thinking, while the latter has an arm on the former to stop him from falling into lava. Of course, the latter then decides to do a salute.
- Doc swears on "Scout's honor" that he didn't know about the Blues and Reds' plans. However, Doc was never a Boy Scout because he's afraid of badges.
- When Doc gets a closer look at Carolina:Doc: Oh, jeez! What did Temple do to you? They told me you and Wash were at the spa!
Tucker: Who would believe that?
Carolina: Tucker, you thought we were out getting food.
Tucker: I— Okay, hearing that back now, it does sound kinda stupid. - Temple's hilariously awful evil monologue to the armor-locked Reds and Blues, which consists of an absurd string of Metaphorgotten old quotes, song lyrics, and pop-culture references - backed by a "monologue mix."
- Grif's Big Damn Heroes moment fails epically- instead of dramatically swinging to the rescue, he slips and falls with comical sound effects. Even Temple is amused.
Episode 21: Epilogues
- Caboose's speech to Season 1 Church is sweet, but it's just a little undercut by the latter's angry demands for an explanation.Season 1 Church: All right, which one of you asshats wants to tell me what the fuck is going on right now?!
- The contrast between Caboose's hi-def finger and Church's low-res helmet when Caboose reaches out to shush him.
- Vic's Heroic Sacrifice. Not only is it a parody of Epsilon's last scene from Season 13 (complete with an 8 bit rendition of the music!), but it serves as the ultimate payoff to the season-long Running Gag of Vic wanting to die: as soon as he reaches that part of Epsilon's speech about whenever someone sacrifices themselves to save the day, said person is the only one to not know the pay off... except here, he begins celebrating finally being able to die.Vic: This is 555-VICK signing off... (pissed) And if anybody backed me up, I will punch you in the nuts.
- On top of all that, the mere fact that due to his above speech being prerecorded, Vic's actual final words were an extended and highly glitched "Duderino".
- After a massive build-up of energy in the wake of Vic's Heroic Sacrifice, the massive time machine-laser drill completes the crescendo by disappearing in a cartoonish "pop!"Grif: Anyone want to explain what the fuck just happened?!Tucker: We, uh, we won...I think.
- Temple's eventual defeat is humiliating to say the least. After going on a corny Vicious Cycle monologue, Tucker scares the shit outta him with the threat of stabbing his face off before deactivating his sword and punching him out, leaving Temple in a hilarious pose.
- Also dips slightly into Awesome due to Tucker getting one hell of a comeback in on Temple considering Temple backstabbed just about all his allies.
Temple: Yeah Tucker! If you kill me you'll just perpetuating this neverending cycle of revenge and retaliation! My frriends will avenge me!Tucker: What friends?Temple: I... Uh... Nonononononono! No don't, please! (Gets decked)Tucker: (snarled) Dickhead. - Wash is fine, being taken care of by Dr. Grey on Chorus! According to the Lieutenants and Sister, he claimed he had an important message for the Reds and Blues - before he started singing the Duck Tales theme song and fell asleep.
- Dylan and Jax's heartwarming talk is completely derailed when Jax clarifies that when he said he'd "never forget this," he meant because of the case of PTSD that he'd developed.
- When Dylan calls Carlos Trabka at the very end to finally deliver her story, his attitude is...remarkably pleasant. This is because when Dylan took both his nephew and a starship to pursue the story on her own, he had a complete mental breakdown and had to be prescribed sedatives. The kind that are usually reserved for horses.
- And then Dylan brings up how Jax is recovering from multiple gunshot wounds, and the ship is completely totaled. As such, Carlos' serenity starts to slip. Then Dylan says she's got the story, but it'll have to wait. Cue Carlos finally losing his mind:
Carlos Trabka: I'M NOT WAITING! Don't you dare hang up on me, all right?! I'm not above putting out a contract on your stinky, filthy, pencil-headed little life, Dylan! Ahahahahaha!Dylan Andrews: Yo dude, take a chill pill. - Lopez' head having been dumped into the ocean.
- The Blues and Reds getting served fish in prison.
- We actually get to hear Carolina singing in the end credits! And it's ...appropriately awful. (tellingly, Jen Brown laughs herself silly once the lyrics end)
- The last stinger during the credits? Church still having no idea what the fuck the thing with Caboose and the time portal was about.Season 1 Church: What the actual fuck? All right, well, I'm just gonna try to forget that ever happened and never bring it up again.
The Shisno
- The season opens with another redo of "You ever wonder why we're here?", this time with a pair of knights who talk in Ye Olde Butcherede Englishe.
- The whole conversation regarding where to get food. Highlights include that Tucker is banned from Hooters (not surprising) and Caboose's suggestion for "cotton candy from Home Depot" makes Carolina conclude " And now, we know where all the wall insulation went...".
- Caboose's nonchalant reaction to Donut's Body Horror.Caboose: Hey Donut! Hey, um we're getting some food. Do you, uhhhhh, eat food?Caboose: Ah, yeah me too. Tell me, how do you feel about Greek?All the Donuts get absorbed into a floating Donut who starts glitching out and contorting horrificallyCaboose: Yeah, me neither. What about Fish and Chips?Donut: (Screaming as his body contorts more and more until it's a mess of angular polygons)Caboose: Yeah, I am always confused about that too. Why say "Chips" when you mean "Freedom Fries"?Donut: (Horrified continuous scream as his body vanishes into nothing)Caboose: Yeah okay, see you soon!
- Simmons on Grif's attitude.
Incendiary Incidents
- After Grif crashes the Pelican, most of the others roast him, per regulation.
- Simmons's reaction to Grif's Leaning on the Fourth Wall approach to "incendiary incidents".Simmons: So your new "science" is pre-emptive laziness.
Grif: Yup!
Simmons: That is so stupid, Grif. *sniff* I'm so proud of you! - Donut's return, even warranting Sarge to say "How many times have I warned you about going AWOL and mysteriously showing up in foreign bodies of water?"
- After Donut's dramatic explanation of the gang's new impending adventure (complete with bombastic music score), Grif immediately assumes that this is a prank - specifically, Donut getting revenge for the rest of Red Team telling him that Extreme Home Makeover was going to spruce up Red Base.Donut: (suddenly angry) THIS IS NOT RELATED TO THAT SUBSTANTIAL BETRAYAL OF TRUST!!
- After Grif puts in a huge effort to avoid anything that could be a Call to Adventure, including deliberately crashing the Pelican to avoid Locus' emergency message, taking a longer path to the pizza place, and trying to cut off Donut's ridiculously long explanation about his return...the pizza joint they were headed to got blown up.Grif: There is no God.
- The cop who keeps making one Suspiciously Specific Denial after another about his connection to the destruction surrounding them and overexplaining things about his armor without being prompted. Sarge is the one who talks to him, and is clearly confused by his irrelevant and lengthy explanations. The mere fact that Sarge finds someone odd is hilarious.
- To add to it, while initially it's implied he may be lying about being a cop and be the culprit of the destruction, by the end of the season we know the cause was Kalirama and the cop is not mentioned again, meaning it's likely that he really was just a really weird cop.
- The fact that the time-travel portals fired by Donut's gun share the same color as his armor, give or take a shade.
- Simmons feels Donut isn't talking like he usually does. And then he goes "These Donut Holes are tight! They can only fit two grown men at once!"
- "Lady, I think I speak for everyone when I say... Marry me!!"
Lost Time
- The transitions where one group seems to reply to the previous one.Grif: No! I just found the shuffle button.
Tucker: Seriously? Are you sure?
Sister: I know that symbol! It’s a shuffle button.(later)
Sister: How’s this fuckin’ thing work?
Sarge: Watch your language, Simmons!(later)
Sarge: You tell that lazy idiot to wake up!
Caboose: Wake up! Wake up, Lopez! - Sister wants to have fun... but not with Tucker, she wants to time travel and bang celebrities, including King Tut.
- "Fortune favors the bold, Simmons! You think Tommy Edison invented electricity by sitting around thinking about it? Heck no! He flew a kite in a goddamn lightning storm! Well Simmons, you’re holding the kite in them there hands. Do you want to take it apart, or see how that baby flies?"
- Sarge was a Lieutenant... whose commanding officer was one Sgt. Lieutenant. And it's implied that Future!Sarge sniped Sgt. Lieutenant so his past self would take command as the next highest ranked officer.
- Sarge's misguided attempt at fixing the horrible outcome of a past battle. It must be seen to truly understand why that battle ended so badly.
- Caboose fixed Lopez with "a glue out of leaves and spit and glue".
- Caboose mistaking "fixing the past to save the future" for getting a "fixed interest savings account", and then realizing he lost his lucky penny, which he found just yesterday. It then cuts to a moment in Season 15 where he found a penny on the floor.
- Caboose's sudden understanding of Lopez.
Lopez: (My god, this is going to backfire!)
Caboose: Oh, it won't backfire. Let's go, Lopez!
Lopez: (...Wait, what?)- Just the mere fact that Caboose (who can't understand anything) and Lopez (who can't be understood) got paired together.
Sis and Tuc's Sexellent Adventure
- The title itself is a humorous reference to Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure.
- The episode description:Tucker and Sister go on a side quest to settle a romantic argument. Grif yells at children.
- The hurricane of euphemisms Tucker and Sister engage into describing whether they had sex or not.
- Sister has a fetish for Jack the Ripper.
- The fact that Sister, the woman who wants to bang Jack the Ripper, considers herself above sleeping with Tucker.
- Tucker decides to demonstrate the safety's on in the sniper rifle and shoots Captain Flowers.
- Just when Sarge could realize the one guilty for his failure is himself... he instead puts the blame on "all the morons under my command".
- Grif getting extremely pissed off at a group of kids just because they don't know what pizza is. And once he realizes he's in a world where pizza never existed, he simply, without missing a beat, pulls out a grenade and tries to blow himself up, no hesitation whatsoever.
- "Dammit Tucker, you've managed to double cock block me with a single word!"
Headshots
- Sarge and Simmons have formed a team of elite soldiers from throughout history. Sounds cool, but the people they found leave a lot to be desired.
- First, they recruited Private John, who, despite playing many badass characters, is still just an actor. In fact, he tried to get into the US Naval Academy and didn't get accepted, so it's baffling that Sarge thought he'd be an asset to their team.
- Their second recruit, Private George, comes the closest to being competent, since he's actually seen combat. But he's still confused about being on the Red Team when he fights Redcoats, and calls battle rifles muskets.
- Their last recruit was Private Alex, who seems like he'd be a worthy addition to Red Team. Unfortunately, they seem to have picked him up towards the end of his life, and his immune system can't handle modern germs, so he mostly just coughs and collapses on the ground as he dies from the Common Cold of all things. And he only speaks Ancient Macedonian!
- Sarge shoots Temple... and it's an actor playing him in Jax's movie. And the producer gets more and more unsettled as he realizes the guy is dead.Jax: What the hell was that, who the hell are you, and what the fuck did you do to my actor?!
- Jax in the year since Season 15 has become a major Prima Donna Director who's totally unconcerned with the well being of his crew. He's even glad Sarge murdered one of his actors because the guy had a major scandal and this would net him free press.
- Jax's explanation for why the actors for his film are wearing their armor? It's because they're method actors, and also he's also forcing them to.
- Sarge again has an Ignored Epiphany.Simmons… have you ever heard the phrase, ‘my own worst enemy?’ I am my own worst enemy...’s worst nightmare!
A Pizza the Action
- Grif's understandably ill-advised attempt at trying to teach the ancient Italians how to make pizza.
- "Being vegan while made entirely out of meat, kinda hypocritical."
- Sister and Tucker apparently screwed up history some more, including causing the accident that paralyzed Christopher Reeve and shooting Hitler.
- Doc makes an excessively green pizza... and Grif tries to kill him.
- Not only does Grif slowly turn towards Doc as he lists the ingredients, but there's also the abrupt hard cut after Doc mentions lactose-free goat cheese... to Grif unloading his gun at Doc's general location (who's crouched behind their oven crying in fear).HOW DID YOU RUIN PIZZA?!!
- Not only does Grif slowly turn towards Doc as he lists the ingredients, but there's also the abrupt hard cut after Doc mentions lactose-free goat cheese... to Grif unloading his gun at Doc's general location (who's crouched behind their oven crying in fear).
- Wasted out of their minds, having drank antifreeze, Sister and Tucker start Volleying Insults - culminating in the former wanting to "hatesex you to death", before...
- Muggins doing a WWE style intro for Atlus, complete with airhorns. The drunk soldiers calling him "a talking Lens Flare" and "J. J. Abrams" is a bonus.
- Atlus is insulted by Sister and Tucker. It doesn't end well.
- ...Until the next episode, where it promptly gets hilarious.
- The return of O'Malley, culminating in:O'Malley: Yes, 'tis I! Enjoy the sixth century! Ah ha ha ha ha! Gotcha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! [Opens a Donut Hole, and disappears]
Grif: PIIIIIIIIZZZZZZAAAAA!
Huggins: Well, that's a bummer.
It Just Winked At Me
- Atlus' fearsome smiting of Tucker and Sister...doesn't work.(Attempt One - Big Explosion)Tucker: Holy fuck; I'm alive!Sister: Hoh, holy fuck; I'm glad this visor's tinted!Atlus: RRRRRRRRRRRRRRHHH!!(Attempt Two - Bolt of Divine Retribution)Tucker: My arm hair's all static-y. Is that what you meant to do?Sister: (to Atlus) Could you just smite me up here, on my back? I've got this wicked knot -Atlus: AARRRRRGGGHH!!!!(Attempt Three - Big Explosion, Part 2)Sister: Oh, yeah; right there...
- Just the fact that the episode heavily features a live-action Cyclops, played by Gus himself! And his wife, also played by him!
- When Atlus summons the Cyclops he politely asks for his name and gets a growl for a response. Atlus declares the Cyclops name "Raagh" - either because that's actually the monster's name, or not caring all that much and just going with the growl as the answer.
- Atlus declaring "Huzzah! A fine kill" while making the sign of the horns with both hands when he thinks Tucker has been killed.
- Earlier, when Tucker decides to stand his ground and fight (much to Sister's exasperation), Atlus goads him on in a... rather un-godly fashion.
Atlus: Yeah, DO IT! You WUSS!! - Tucker manages to hide in a mountain crevasse. Infuriated, the Cyclops pounds on the crack with his fists, and Tucker takes the opportunity to taunt the monster:Tucker: You can't fit the whole hand in, bro! You gotta start with one finger - (Cyclops prepares to do just that) Oh, FUCK! IT SPEAKS ENGLISH!!
- Sister tries to kill the Cyclops with Tucker's sword only for him to inform her it only works for him... after she has leaped off a cliff to attack it. Doing a Xena Kiai!Tucker: IT ONLY TURNS ON FOR ME BOW-CHICKA-WOW-WOW!
- "Shoryuken, motherfucker!"
- When summoning the Cyclops's wife Atlus mentions they've been trying for a child and ask Tucker which of them should tell her about the Groin Attack he just pulled on her husband, clearly having the time of his life making things miserable for the Troopers.
- Huggins starts thinking about what she can do (one option she particularly likes: murder) before just deciding to ask for Grif's help. Who at first thinks she's an hallucination, then concludes that he doesn't care anyway before walking off.
Recovery
- Washington's childhood cat was just as indestructible as him, surviving an electrocution fall (cat climbed a tree, Wash's father decided to solve it by cutting it with a chainsaw, the tree crashed on electric lines), a dryer, and a truck engine.
- Carolina and Wash go through a training course, with all the expected acrobatics... including Carolina jumping with hands behind her back.◊
- Carolina and Dr. Grey discussing Wash's condition...while the latter is doing an autopsy. Carolina, a Super-Soldier who's just short of being a Spartan, is suitably unnerved.
- Carolina slowly descends into despair as Dylan outlines where (and when) the Reds and Blues are, ultimately leading to this in this:Carolina: It's not unlike them to get lost, but...oh God, not this kind of lost ...
- The odd pairing that's Grif and Huggins continues to give. High point: Grif decides to shut her up with his rifle, even if she's made of light and thus not exactly a shootable target.
Walk and Talk
- Jax is having more difficulty with his cast.Jax: You know I how I feel about that word! Nothing is impossible!
Producer: Okay, it's not impossible! But, launching a camera on a rocket towards...human actors is, is extremely dangerous and probably won't even work.
Jax: (Laughs) I'm not an idiot. I know it probably won't work, but that just means we'll have to do a lot of takes. It may take weeks!
Producer: (Wheezes) We can't-! We can't-! Sweet Jesus, my chest...! (Collapses)
Jax: Right before we shoot the first act. There's a defibrillator in the hallway, Cohan, or do you need me to do that for you as well!?
Pvt. George: Pardon me. You have guests, sir.
Jax: IF THEY'RE FROM THE STUDIO, YOU CAN TELL THEM TO WAIT IN THE FUCKING TRASH COMPACT- (Sees Freelancers and tone shifts to cordial) Oh, hey, it's Carolina and Washington! - Jax uses actual extras instead of mannequins for Temple's "trophy room". One of them is Sarge, who only talks again when hearing "Simon says..."
- This exchange;Wash: Sarge, do you...have...a time machine?
Sarge: Of course not!
Carolina: Oh, thank God.
Sarge: I lent it to Simmons. - Grif and Huggins, which is also endearing for how the Odd Couple is becoming an Odd Friendship:
- Huggins talks with a Southern accent, Grif has to hide his laughter.
- Grif tries to pass Die Hard as his own story. Huggins jumps in just at the Catchphrase (and hearing her cutesy voice going "Yipee-ki-yay, motherfucker!" is already hilarious), and says her uncle is a spotlight in that movie.
- A problem with walking to England? The English Channel. And Grif can't swim, so he walks the whole way, while struggling with gas.I'm a fart submarine!
- To prove that their time travel is real, Simmons opens a portal to himself a few weeks ago, where Sarge's attempt at recruiting Achilles is going wrong. When Past Simmons asks for advice, Present Sarge informs him that he'll eventually get frustrated and stab Achilles in the foot... which gives Past Sarge an idea. One Wilhelm Scream later, Past Sarge and Simmons decide to bail, leaving Wash and Carolina to boggle at what just happened.
- After the "Sarge in storage closet" free will conundrum is delivered, they open it and find... Caboose and Lopez.
Caboose's Travels
- Caboose's little slideshow and narration of his temporal misadventures. Let's just say it's a good thing that You Already Changed the Past is in effect. Even better is the Disaster Dominoes that happened right after Caboose jump started human development; Namely, he made some cavemen a fire, and this devolved into forming a primitive rock band when he caught on fire himself. Caboose then fled to the Library of Alexandria (48 B.C), London, England (1666 A.D), and the Hindenburg in New Jersey, US (1937 A.D)- setting them all on fire.Caboose: I was teaching them how to play "We Didn't Start the Fire" when I caught on fire...!
- Jax is considering not going back to work, but then George reminds him they'll be shooting the maiming scene and he changes his mind.
- Tucker became King of England because his sword was mistaken for Excalibur. He renames the castle as Camelto and is as incompetent as it gets... and then a visitor arrives, insulting him in all manners possible (which the guards struggle not to laugh about), including one that makes Tucker identify as a comrade ("cockbite").
- Tucker's little rant, implying that his kingship is just one big ploy to impress Sister;Grif: (Aside to Kaikaina) What the fuck is wrong with Tucker?
Sister: Somebody doesn’t take rejection well.
Tucker: God damn it! Respect me! I hold the magic sword, and thusly, I decide what’s what! My word is law! The sun and the moon are the same thing! Mice grow up to be dogs! Scott Bakula’s Star Trek is one long weird episode of Quantum Leap! You will respect me! You will kneel!
Sister: We can see your boner.
Tucker: Eep! I’ll fire you from the trebuchet! - Showing how Grif and Huggins have bonded, they fist bump◊.
- "You’re my father? Oh my. That makes me Fabulous Jesus!"
- Donut's interactions with the Big Bad.Chrovos: I know what you're getting at... and yes. I am that gum's father.
- Followed by:Chrovos: Donut, look at me. I would never eat your sandwich.
- Followed by:
Sword Loser
- Huggins rehearsing what she's going to say to the gods, then immediately screwing up and cursing in her cute lil voice.Huggins: Okay, Huggins. Lord, I come with news of the Shisno. Lord, I come with news of the Shisno. Lord, I come with... [calling out] Dad, I—! [quietly, to herself] Fuck!
- Huggins giving the news to the gods.Huggins: I’ve made progress, Lord Atlus!
Atlus: Ah! You’ve smashed them to dust!
Huggins: I don’t have hands, my Lord.
Atlus: Then why even bother standing before me?
Huggins: I can’t actually stand, Lord Atlus?
Golfer: You too?! I can’t stand him either! - Atlus being called out on turning into a swan.
- An enraged Atlus creating what is essentially the shattered moon from RWBY. Then he breaks down. And Kalirama is turned on by his fury ("Smite me?").
- Also, this funny little bit towards the end of the scene:
Atlus: Huggins! Huggins, I've changed my mind! We will meet in... (addresses this question at Kalirama) ten? (Kalirama opens all the fingers on all four of her hands in a counting motion to give him a better estimate.) Twenty minutes! - Tucker is grown to be the same size as Atlus. He refuses to do the same for Grif and Sister because "there's no room".
- "Fee-fi-fuck off, Grif!"
- After Atlus shrinks to a human-ish size, his voice is first high pitched before returning to normal.
- When Tucker requests that the gods increase the size of his dong, Atlus asks Muggins to explain... what a "dong" is. He actually respects the wish once he understands.
- Grif's Hurricane of Puns celebrating his new Laser Blade. One of which is the title of the episode.
Docudrama
- The "take off your clothes" misunderstanding in Season 15, in Jax's movie is downright the start of a CarWash love(making) scene, to the Freelancers' shock.I want to be in you like an AI!
- Donut reunites with his "friends" in classic Donut fashion: a hurricane of Double Entendres.
- Caboose's greatest challenge for him to overcome are Chinese finger traps. Cue him with his fingers stuck in one.
- Producer Kohan Wooter, who already had two breakdowns in previous episodes, is still giving praise to Jax... while at gunpoint by him. When the funding is cut, he rejoices ("I'm free!").
- The attempt by Jax to do a chart of all the time travel is ignored given it looks like a dick.
- Apparently Jax has used the time machine to recast his movie, and the results?!John Wayne Sarge: Well pal I hope you brought your wallet. Because rent in hell gets paid in advance!!Rodney Dangerfield Tucker: What’d I tell ya. I get no respect.!Tommy Wiseau Caboose: It’s bullshit. I did not hit her! I did not! Oh, hi Grif.!Jeff Bridges Grif: For the last time, I’m not Grif, man. I’m the Dude!!Rodney Dangerfield Tucker: Bow chicka wow bow. One more time! Bow chicka bow bow! What is it? What’s the line? Feed it to me.
- Jax realizes that he no longer has access to a time machine after the Reds and Blues leave to their meeting with the gods, so he follows them through a time portal and interrupts Atlus in the process. He gets a godly hammer to the face for his trouble.
- Aside from losing his main weapon because he threw it through a time portal, Atlus is made to apologize by Kalirama.Kalirama: I think they knew him, honey.
Atlus: That mortal idiot interrupted me!
Kalirama: (flat stare)
Atlus: (sighs) I'm sorry I smited your mortal idiot friend.
Grif: Eh. No harm no foul.
Atlus: (groans disgustedly) That...was my primary weapon. (Wide shot to see Atlus is now holding a regular pistol) Don't...don't look at it.
Carolina: This... is God?
- Aside from losing his main weapon because he threw it through a time portal, Atlus is made to apologize by Kalirama.
- Sarge is frustrated to learn Kalirama is married, while Tucker and Wash are appalled to learn she's Atlus's wife and sister.Wash: (audibly revolted) This is some Game of Thrones shit.
A Time for Hammers
- Atlus's exposition gets some annoyed groans and response, the best being Kaikaina's "'In the beginning was the word?' If you bring out a guitar, I'm done."
- A frustrated Sarge complains that Grif now has a sword and gets one. Atlus asks if anyone else is interested, and all of them get it except Carolina... and Caboose, who just wants Genkins's golf club.
- After he delivers the exposition, Atlus takes away the gifts...but lets Caboose keep his new golf club as he thinks it's funny.
- Everyone is frustrated that the ultimate weapon Burnstorm created to re-imprison Chrovos is just called "The Hammer", and tries thinking up better names. Even Atlus gets caught in it!
- Special mention goes to Sarge's suggestion that kicks off the whole thing: "The Grand Hammer of Power-Kaboomness."
- After Kalirama says that "Few have made the Journey, none have survived.", Wash's response is "When you put it like that, how could we say no?"
Lights Out
- Tucker and Sister's conversation is mostly heartfelt, but slips at times into Accidental Innuendo (not always punctuated by Bow Chicka Wow Wow).
- Sarge agrees with the plan... until Simmons reminds him that Tucker made it, making him suddenly angry.
- "It's been ten minutes since you saw him! You don't need to say 'Greetings' every time."
Paradox
- After a briefing listing everything to avoid, including the Butterfly of Doom, Caboose shows a crushed moth and asks if that counts.
- The return of groggy and slightly insane Wash ("He who smelt it, dealt it!").
- To dispatch of a few guards, the Reds and Blues decide to "use what they learned": Sarge lures two into a portal to Iris, where Mrs. Cyclops is still roaming; Tucker opens another portal, crushing two with a horse; and Caboose is told that one stole his penny, leading to a golf club strike ("Fouuur percent interest!").
- The fight between Donut and O'Malley. The whole thing!
Other
- This tweet reacting to the trailer, along with its two official responses (producer Koen Wooten and writer-director Joe Nicolosi).
- Following all the criticism the season got, writers Joe Nicolosi and Jason Weight (with help from Miles Luna) went full Trolling Creator with this whiteboard.
- As a fan asked Joe Nicolosi what happened to Jax given the show never returned to him, the response was incredible, including saying Jax went through his own versions of Event Horizon and The Lord of the Rings.
- The official episode description: "The Reds and Blues ruin the universe."
- Grif is in the middle of telling Donut that red-colored armor is only for sergeants and recruits, but peters off before he can finish.Grif: There's only two types of people who wear standard issue armor; Officers and uh... the uh...
Donut: Really trustworthy and likeable people?
Simmons: Hey! I'm the suck-up around here, don't step on my territory!
Donut: I'm sorry sir, It won't happen again.
Simmons: What. Did. I. Just. Say?! - As they rib on Donut, Grif and Simmons complain about getting déjà vu. Simmons says that the Blues probably don't have to put up with it. Well...Tucker: You know what? Forget what I said before. We can definitely pick up chicks in this thing. Probably two or three-
"Church": (at the same time) Probably two or three chicks a piece. Yes, your heterosexuality has been noted, Tucker. - At Genkins' request, Chrovos takes a form other than a Monitor. His first try is a double of Genkins ("That would get weird-" "This would get weird, wouldn't it?"), and the next is Donut.Genkins: You haven't seen many people over the eons, have you? That form is a bad idea, and I'll show you why. Say something. Anything.
Donut!Chrovos: I am Chrovos- ugh, oh my God.
Genkins: Horrible! I just threw up a little in my mouth.- Chrovos finally settles on a female form, and is clearly enjoying it.Genkins: Grandfather, I don't even know where to start...Chrovos: Then don't! Why should you get all the shape-shifting fun?
- And then there's Donut's reaction to his new form:Chrovos: Do you have any idea what that Hammer did?!Donut: ...Did it give you a sex change?
- Chrovos finally settles on a female form, and is clearly enjoying it.
- Speaking of Genkins and Chrovos, there's the former's confusion over how last season changed the terminology of "Shisno" from an insult by aliens for humans to Paradox Persons.Genkins: (while he and Chrovos are discussing Donut's fate) What should we do with the Shisno? A-and incidentally, who named them "Shisno" anyway? It's a derogatory term for "human," right?
Chrovos: (dismissively) The prophecy predicted they would be human, (sounding genuinely curious) and the Fates are, I guess...racist? - "Leave him [Donut] to me, He is just where I want him." "On his back and unconscious?"
- Donut's seriously Skewed Priorities.Chrovos: It's not just your friends at risk now.
Donut: Humanity?
Chrovos: Bigger!
Donut: Earth?
Chrovos: I said bigger!
Donut: (gasps) America?!
Chrovos: ...Light has yet to reach the depths of your ignorance. - In an alternate timeline where Church never got killed by Sheila and Tucker becomes more confident due to having a stronger leader, Tucker kills C.T. instead of Epsilon ("My name is Lavernius Tucker, and you will fear my laser sword!"), and eventually becomes so full of himself he dies trying to leap over a battleship with a tank.Chrovos: But he lives a powerful and confident existence... (Beat) Briefly.
- There exists an alternate timeline where Caboose joins the Red Team. Caboose is apparently having a great time, and Sarge compares Caboose to "the delightful pet cat he never had, Muffy."
- This exchange between Donut and Chrovos after she shows him how the different timelines are weakening her prison:Chrovos: Now every one of them serves me. I'll be free in no time. (softly cackles to herself)
Donut: Nuh-uh!
Chrovos: (drily) Interesting counterpoint, Donut. Oh please, do tell me more! - Chrovos tries to come up for a name for the "soft-time singularity" where the alternate timelines are being made, and asks for Donut's opinion. He suggests "the Everwhen." Chrovos is audibly disgusted.
- Donut's double entendres return with a vengeance.Donut: Screw around with me, but don't screw around with my friends! If anyone is going to do any screwing around here, it's me! Screwing you!
Everwhen
- The official episode description: "Donut learns what an innuendo is."
- "Hey, I remember this! They're memories!"
- Relatedly, there's Donut's lengthy scream while falling through the Everwhen... only to casually cut himself off and just look around like he's not hurtling through space-time.
- Donut's time travel adventure begins with him reliving the time Wash shot him at the end of Recreation. Multiple times.Donut: Ugh! (in pain) Why'd it have to be this memory...?!
- And near the episode's end, after Donut's finally given up:Chrovos: (laughs) And he came directly home!Donut: (grumpily) No, I got shot by Wash a couple more times.
- And near the episode's end, after Donut's finally given up:
- Donut finally goes back to explain Chrovos's evil plan, but no one believes him.
- His first try is derailed by Tucker complaining that Donut's entire dialogue seems to consist of Innocent Innuendo, and that he's in no mood for it at the time (when they were in the Blues and Reds' base). Donut's response doesn't exactly help his case, and when Future!Donut leaves in a huff, his past self keeps standing there and is very confused by everyone's bafflement.Donut: Guys, we are inching towards an explosive climax!Tucker: That, that is what I mean!
- Next, Donut travels back in time to Season 10... and admits that Tucker might have had a point.Simmons: Um, you okay, man?Donut: Heh, yeah, just, y'know, reliving every sentence I've ever said... (quietly, sounding genuinely horrified) Man, Tucker was right about me!
- Donut's trip to Season 10 also has him getting increasingly frustrated with no one listening to him, angrily pointing out that Wash (the guy who had previously shot him) is given more respect than him.Wash: (laughs nervously while looking back and forth) Heh, that, that was a long time ago!
Donut: Multiple times today!! (Beat with everyone staring at Donut) ...I'm sorry, it's been a weird three minutes.
- His first try is derailed by Tucker complaining that Donut's entire dialogue seems to consist of Innocent Innuendo, and that he's in no mood for it at the time (when they were in the Blues and Reds' base). Donut's response doesn't exactly help his case, and when Future!Donut leaves in a huff, his past self keeps standing there and is very confused by everyone's bafflement.
- Finally, Donut travels back to Season 3 to when Red Team and Caboose were trying to do their time travel play for Tucker. Donut's explanation that he's from the future keeps getting sidetracked by Simmons insisting he's supposed to be the future and Donut's the narrator.Simmons: You're off-script, and you're ruining my life.
- And as with Chrovos, everyone thinks that "Everwhen" is a terrible name.Simmons: Ugh, sounds like a Pearl Jam album.
Sarge: Heh, right! Or a Neil Gaiman novel!
(Grif and Simmons both turn to Sarge in surprise)
Sarge: (defensively) ...What?! I read! - Caboose obviously knows how to check Donut's claims.Caboose: If you are from the future, what am I thinking about right... now?
Donut: (frustrated) I don't know!
Caboose: Oh my God, I don't know either! - Sarge's response once Donut finally manages to get through his whole explanation and he realizes just how crazy it all sounds:Sarge: Donut, I may not say this often enough, but... shut up forever.
- And as with Chrovos, everyone thinks that "Everwhen" is a terrible name.
- Chrovos' hilariously terrible attempts to stop Donut from leaving the Everwhen after she realizes that she unwittingly gave Donut the idea to go to the time after the Time Crash instead of just giving up. When she tries to chase after Donut while desperately stammering out an excuse, Chrovos just runs into the invisible barrier containing her and angrily growls "Dammit!".
Schrodingin'
- The official episode description: "Wash resigns as financier of The Giant Walking Cannon Funeral Company."
- Genkins continues to mess up with the timeline. He monologues to Junior (getting frustrated that the only replies are 'blargh' and 'honk') before killing him with a plasma grenade, drops a Pelican on Tex during Season 3, and possesses Santa so as to tell Locus that Felix's fear is knives (even if Felix uses throwing knives).
- Dr. Grey returns! And her tact is the same as always - she's introduced asking Donut if he's dying - and now she has wacky sound effects (airhorns when saying Wash last visited "to give me a fat check", and a Rimshot for an Incredibly Lame Pun regarding the hospital's new wingnote )!Dr. Grey: If this hospital was a bird, she'd fly around in circles!
Donut: How?
Dr. Grey: Because it'd have one looong wing! (Rimshot)- How did Wash get so rich? He made a fortune selling cannons... for funerals. It was Dr. Grey's idea, because of course it was.Dr. Grey: Blasts ya straight into the ground! Or space! Or the ocean, if you got a foot fetish! (Copious Beat follows) So folks at the beach can paddle in you forever!
- This exchange between Donut and Dr. Grey when Donut questions how profitable the Giant Walking Cannon Funeral Company could possibly be:Dr. Grey: After death care is a pet interest of mine and, by extension, Wash. He suddenly loves my ideas, so project's burning through cash like a fire at a money store!
Donut: (confused) ...Don't you mean the bank?
Dr. Grey: (dismissively) Well, it's not like it's my money... - Finally, there's this line from Dr. Grey after Donut realizes how dire the situation is concerning Wash and that he needs to find him.Dr. Grey: Fine! I guess I have..."patients" to heal.
- How did Wash get so rich? He made a fortune selling cannons... for funerals. It was Dr. Grey's idea, because of course it was.
- Due to his status as a Paradox Person, Wash is alternating between his groggy and sane selves. The former, who is definitely the one loving/buying Dr. Grey's ideas, notes that "Emily's a smart cookie, and you're... a Donut!".
- When Donut is trying to explain what he did to resolve Wash's paradoxical nature, Wash's butler is the one to explain itnote . It's only when he finished talking that Wash then promptly shouts due to being started by his presence.Wash: (to Donut) Who the fuck is that?!
Donut: I don't know, that's your butler!- Said butler is then ignored as he tries to ask for his paycheck from Wash right before he leaves with Donut. And it turns out he's not actually British; he's from the Southern US.
- And on a side note, not only is it heavily implied that a descendant of Elon Musk is somehow involved with the Giant Walking Cannon Funeral Company, but the penthouse apartment where Wash is living in has the elevator doors flanked by two golden statues of a Grunt from Halo and a pig.
- Wash's reaction after hearing about the Everwhen:Wash: Whoa. That's, uh-
Donut: Bananas? Ba-nay-nay? Nanners-bananners?
Wash: I was going to say "impossible to believe," but I was a rich funeral cannon tycoon a few hours ago, so what do I know?
Breaching the Torus
- The official description for the episode: "People are shot. Only Simmons seems to mind." So right away, one can tell where Wash and Donut will wind up in this episode.
- Unlike Donut, Wash doesn't put up with Chrovos' crap.Chrovos: Boys, you cracked my case... cracked it more, I should say. But alas, your hubris has-
Wash: You know, you use a lot of fancy words for a jailbird. - As soon as Wash jumps into the Everwhen, he's flailing and screaming just like Donut originally was.Wash: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! I REGRET THIS SO MUCH!!!
- Wash and Donut go back together, and for a past scene featuring both, of course it's Donut getting shot. And again - repeatedly.Wash: Oh no. I am so, so sorry!
Donut: Remember...further back! Further back-- And much, much later, right after a genuinely emotional talk between Wash and Donut on Chorus:Donut: (exasperated) How. Does. It. Hurt. More. Every. Time?!
- And in those scenes, Simmons is clearly unsettled that Wash just shot Lopez. Not to mention baffled at Wash and Donut having friendly conversations afterwards, with Simmons being heard freaking out in the background during each loop. However, special mention must be given to Wash and Donut's terrible attempt to calm down Simmons the second time around:Donut: (panicky) Don't shoot! Don't shoot!
Wash: I-I'm not going to!
Simmons: You shot Lopez! What the hell, man?!
Donut: Oh, no! Uh, it's okay Simmons, Wash...uh, had to shoot Lopez! Right, Wash? Lopez was, uh...
(Both Wash and Donut nervously stammer as they try to think up a good excuse)
Wash: ...A robot!
Simmons: Of course he's a fucking robot, why did you shoot him?!
Wash: Uh, an evil robot!
Simmons: (dismissively) Yeah I know, he's the worst, but that still doesn't-
Wash: (exasperated) You know what, just shut up, Simmons. - At the end of the second scene where this happens, after an extended conversation about their current situation, Donut explains that everything has to happen the exact same way it did before. Wash promptly shoots him again.
- The last time through, as soon as Wash and Donut come up with a new plan, they leave their past bodies... who proceed to point a gun and yelp respectively.
- And much, much later, right after a genuinely emotional talk between Wash and Donut on Chorus:
- When Donut and Wash travel back in time to Season 13 right after the Battle of Armonia when the Reds, Blues, Feds, and Rebels are all camped out at Crash Site Bravo, Kimball is utterly befuddled at Washington first calling her name out of the blue before promptly leaving.
- Furthermore, poor Donut still can't seem to stop himself with his innuendoes, no matter how hard he tries.
- Relatedly, while Wash and Donut's conversation on Chorus is mostly serious, it does give us this delightful exchange:Wash: (irritated) Donut, when I want crudely made innuendos, I'll ask for them.
Donut: (defensively) But Wash, I haven't said any of those! Not since my buddies laid into me one by one by one... (groans) Oh, I've never stopped!
The Not So Good Ol' Days
- Once Wash realizes he's in his days as a Recovery agent, he tries summing up the mission ("Up there is the body of your old pal, York, surrounded by a bunch of other bodies, and one son of a bitch pretending to be a body so he can turn you into a body"), goes "This is fine" like the dog from Gunshow, concludes it is not fine... and then gets his jeep blown up.Wash: (drily) Hello, Wyoming. I suppose you don't have a second Warthog lying around?
- Wyoming getting frustrated at all the time travel bollocks that Wash is spewing.Wyoming: This is just not going at all the way I thought it would!
Wash: Tell me about it. - The Failure Montage where Wash tries to figure out where Carolina would be in the years after the Meta threw her off a cliff. So he goes back to Project Freelancer's heyday and tries to determine where she'd go afterwards by asking hypotheticals. Of course, back then Wash was considered the resident Butt-Monkey and Carolina was a total Jerkass, so you can tell how badly this is going to go. It even starts with Agents North and South Dakota ribbing on Wash for a Noodle Incident where he forgot to pull the pin on his grenade.
- This delightful instance of Tempting Fate after York nervously dances around having a relationship with Carolina.
- At one point, poor Wash is reduced to crying in the corner.Wash: Why won't anyone listen to me...?
South: Oh, that's easy... It's because you're a loser.
Wash: ...Is this how Donut feels all the time...? - Another moment is when Wash tries talking to York during a firefight. And not just any firefight, it looks like the assault on the "Insurrection" headquarters from back in Season 10.'Washington: (yelling over gunfire) If she had to go into hiding, what do you think her strategy might be, like, where do you think she might go?!
York: Is now really the best time for this?!
- Eventually, Wash vents off his time travel woes to the Triplets. And Iowa, the dumbest of them all, gives him the idea to just ask Carolina in the future when they're friends. And once it turns out to be the right idea (following an extended Stunned Silence), Wash lets out an enraged yell, confusing Carolina.Wash: (squatting down) ARRGGHHH!!! GODDAMMIT!!!
Carolina: Whoa, are you okay?!
Wash: (strained) I'm great!- There's the extra detail that it sounds like it's muffled, implying that he cut the comms in his helmet just to vent his frustration and his scream is still so loud even through his helmet it sounds like he's speaking normally.
- After Carolina tells Wash of where she was, the land shakes, and there's a roar... followed by Caboose greeting them, showing he's riding dinosaurs as told in Season 15.Carolina: (wearily) Dammit, not again. I should take care of that.
- Given Wash going after Carolina before Season 9 is a paradox in and of itself, a space-time crack appears.Wash: Shit. Sorry, space-time continuum. I'm gonna have you take a few more hits.
Self-Fulfilling Odyssey
- The official episode description: "Sarge gets a 2-for-1 deal on pelicans this week!"
- Genkins prevents Donut from getting crushed by Sister's Pelican... only for Donut to then get crushed by Wash's Pelican when he tries to confront Genkins.
- And then Wash, after a few moments, moves the Pelican off of Donut, causing another paradox burst, delighting Genkins... only for him to be confused, and then horrified.Genkins: (Evil Laugh; sudden realization) Wait, why did- (sees Wash and Carolina step out) NO!
- And then Wash, after a few moments, moves the Pelican off of Donut, causing another paradox burst, delighting Genkins... only for him to be confused, and then horrified.
- When Sarge decides to make a bragging speech upon the arrival of the two Pelicans, Simmons and Grif provide the BGM.
- And by "provide the BGM," they make drum and trumpet noises with their mouths. Special mention must be given to both Grif's hilariously horrible rendition of a bugle and Sarge's offhand remark to the Blues that "You have my... Well, not respect, obviously, but something similar!"
- Furthermore, when the second Pelican crash-lands and Sarge asks Simmons to announce the arrival of their cavalry, Simmons excitedly says "The collective noun for a group of pelicans is a scoop!"
- Caboose initially thinks Carolina is Bruce Willis and Sister is Neil Armstrong.
- Sarge's increasing befuddlement as Wash and Donut force him and the rest of the Reds and Blues to Spot the Thread:Sarge: I feel weird! It feels like I've been Sarged! Oh, what have I been doing to people?!
- Donut tries to sum up everything without a Double Entendre, only for a "penis!" to randomly slip through.
- Grif's initial reaction upon realizing he's back in Blood Gulch is "Have I died and gone to Hell?"
- After "awakening," Grif quickly recognizes Genkins:Grif: Hey, that guy ruined pizza!
Donut: -And time! And space!
Grif: Yeah, that too! But mostly pizza! - After Caboose says that he kept Church's helmet as a memento, Sarge comments off-screen "Badass!"
- Caboose beating up a possessed Church so Genkins would leave his body... and not noticing when the real Church starts complaining.
- While Caboose is beating up Genkins/Church, the following discussion happens:Carolina: What... just happened? And where's Tucker?
Donut: I think today he's giving birth to an alien?
Washington: Ohhhhh.
Carolina: What? - After that, Sister volunteers to help revive Tucker and bring him up to speed:Sister: Tucker needs to be de-briefed.
Grif: Yeah! Wait, what?
Limbo
- Once Huggins is asked about possible paradoxes, realizing what it could be makes her go red and yell "THOSE SONS OF BITCHES!!", making her parents admonish her with "Language!"
- As part of a revenge prank against Tucker, Kaikaina convinces him of various things: He's in purgatory, the future is nothing but women, Sister is his future female self whose has come to break him out, he died in childbrith and Junior is a demon (to which Junior replies with what can be safely assumed is the alien equivalent of a Big "WHAT?!").Tucker: Doc! I'm a phantom, and I have unfinished business on Earth!Doc: Oh dear God.
- When Doc is about to reveal that Sister is playing a prank, Tucker, as part of his unfinished business, reveals that he stole Doc's phone, called his mother, seduced her, then told everyone she was overweight and had saggy breasts. Doc decides not to tell him and go along with the lie.
- When he approaches Donut, the later tiredly explains the entire situation to him and wakes him up, much to Kaikaina's dismay.Tucker: Oh, fuck you, Kaikaina!Sister: (mischevous chuckle)
- Caboose abandons the group to go fix the timeline, something which astonishes Wash and Donut since not only did they not tell him how to time travel, but they also never said they even could in the first place.Wash: (stunned) Is... is Caboose a genius?Sarge: (irritated) If he is, I just prefer not to know.
- Huggins escapes from the black hole and travels to Blood Gulch but in the past (as in, around Season 1). She runs into the past version of Caboose... only for it to be revealed to be the future version of Caboose possessing his past self.
- Before that is her opening line to him:Huggins: Hey, you! Why'd you make a paradox, ya butt?!
- Huggins then explains what she learnt from her parents in the black hole - That black holes actually allow the Universe to loop back to before the Big Bang. Turns out Caboose was right yet again!Caboose: (thoughtfully) Time is made of circles, I am familiar with the concept.
- It's also worth noting that when Huggins starts to fret once she realizes that she hasn't gotten back to the "present" yet, Caboose somehow pops up from the screen border below her to explain how he already knows who she is.
- "Okay, this is whelmed. (goes higher) This is overwhelmed. (goes all the way to the sky) And this is where my ass is at!"
- When she asks if they could talk, Caboose agrees but then says he needs to kill his best friend in an hour so they should hurry it up.
- Before that is her opening line to him:
- The episode opts to nonchalantly reveal via Doc himself that Doc didn't actually die from falling off of the skyscraper.
- After Donut's "The Reason You Suck" Speech to the rest of the Reds and Blues for them having treated him like crap over the past few years, Wash immediately has them all go and apologize to him before they start time-traveling.
- And the reference to the season-long Running Gag during the speech:Donut: You put me down, sideline me, leave me to rot, shoot me over and over...
Wash: Sorry!
- And the reference to the season-long Running Gag during the speech:
Finally
- The official episode description: "Caboose's Guide to Re-Zipping Time."
- Sarge's idea of saying sorry leaves something to be desired.Sarge: Please accept my apology or I'll PUNCH YOUR FACE IN HALF! Five in the pink.
Tucker: Sarge!
Sarge: I have trouble expressing remorse. - To demonstrate Mental Time Travel, Donut has the crew go back ten minutes. Of course, ten minutes ago Sister's airship had crushed him, and Tucker was sick from giving birth ("Ugghhh, my dick-hole!"). Nonetheless, Donut decides to direct everyone from under the Pelican, which hampers things slightly.Lopez: (laughs in Spanish)note
- When Church tries to figure out what the fuck is happening, Caboose tells him it would be easier if he just went to bed, which Church agrees to without hesitation.
- Huggins goes off on Grif for his part in helping cause the paradox, something that goes completely over his head due to him focusing more on the fact that Huggins isn't dead.Huggins: Hmm, hello!
Grif: Huggins! Buddy!
Huggins: (frostily) Oh, hey Grif, you asshole.
Grif: (overjoyed) I missed you!
Huggins: You broke the timeline!
Grif: Bring it in!
Huggins: I'll kill you!- There's also Huggins' brief use of Not Hyperbole to explain how screwed-up the timeline is due to the Blood Gulch Crew's Temporal Paradox.
Grif: You just saved us... so much bullshit. (sniffs) Thank you. I'm sorry we fucked up time.
Huggins: Ugh, I can't stay mad at you forever.
Grif: Awww... Thanks bud.
Huggins: No, I literally can't stay mad at you forever. Time's broken from Wash's injury onwards.
Grif: ...Oh.
Huggins: YOU HAD ONE JOB!
Grif: Uh, ya mean save reality?
Huggins: FIX IT! (changes back to friendly tone) No pressure. Love you! - And the aforementioned conversation happens after Sarge and Huggins get into an argument over how she'll scout for Alternate Timelines and tell Caboose about them in the future so he can travel back to the past and tell the rest of the Blood Gulch Crew about where they need to fix the paradoxes, which Sarge thinks would take forever.Huggins: (exasperated) Yeah, we've already done it! Higher beings represent, baby!
Sarge: (skeptically) Still not sure I subscribe to this "higher beings" malarkey.
Huggins: (starts making herself slowly fade away before she zips off into space) Oh, I'm fading, I'm fading, please believe in me... (immediately reappears) Oh, false alarm. I just went to the fucking moon! - Caboose: "IT ALREADY HAPPENED! HI! ALSO TOOK OUT THE GARBAGE!"
- Caboose explains how they are fixing the timeline by comparing it to fixing a gap in your zipper.Donut: Wow, that's so much clearer.
- Sarge finds himself back in what he states is "the best day of [his] life": when he deleted the Blues back in Reconstruction. Upon smashing the delete key, Genkins makes his presence known by glitching out the computer to prevent the command from going through... and just as he starts to gloat, Simmons reboots the computer and starts up the Command Prompt at said reboot to prevent Genkins' override without batting an eye.
- Sarge decides to relive that moment one more time "just to be sure". Cue a montage of Sarge repeatedly deleting the Blues.
- As it happens, there's a YouTube link visible on the screen. And if you go to it...Caboose: (uneasy) Yeah... Church, (starts turning to ash) I don't feel so good... Wow, you guys are really translucent all of a sudden!
- Not like Church gets it any better:Church: (awkwardly) Well...at least I finally have some piece and quiet. Right? (Turns to ash) Oh, son of a b-
Sarge: Perfectly balanced, like all things should be. Grif, you're next!
- Grif finds himself right at the end of "Why Were We Here?", when Tex is taking off in the Pelican. Upon immediately realizing that Genkins is in Andy, Grif grabs a rocket launcher just as "Andy" attempts to talk Sarge out of making him blow up (with Sarge calling Andy an "AWOL little a-hole" being the cherry on top of the whole moment).Grif: My testicles send their regards, Tex, you metal bitch.
- Genkins then proceeds to take over Tex in order to try and make Church realize he's the Alpha... except Genkins doesn't even bother trying to imitate Tex, instead talking in a hilariously terrible falsetto. The scene also has Genkins' Lampshade Hanging regarding the Director's motivation for creating Tex and why that supposed "romance" is so incredibly flawed and screwed up. The fact that Ricco Fajardo (Genkins' voice actor) is audibly Corpsing by the end of his Tex "impression" somehow only makes the scene funnier.Genkins!Tex: Yeah, Tex here, what he said! Also, Church, you know you’re the ghost of a weird dude who created the robot equivalent of a body pillow, and whose emo lameness will indirectly kill hundreds of innocent peopl-(gets blown to smithereens by Grif's rocket launcher)
- Upon Grif blowing up the Pelican, it is heavily implied prior to cutting away that Church is about to beat Grif to death.
- Genkins then proceeds to take over Tex in order to try and make Church realize he's the Alpha... except Genkins doesn't even bother trying to imitate Tex, instead talking in a hilariously terrible falsetto. The scene also has Genkins' Lampshade Hanging regarding the Director's motivation for creating Tex and why that supposed "romance" is so incredibly flawed and screwed up. The fact that Ricco Fajardo (Genkins' voice actor) is audibly Corpsing by the end of his Tex "impression" somehow only makes the scene funnier.
Succession
- "Que? No! How do you people keep finding me?!"
- Felix is very confused by Tucker talking to Genkins during the finale of Season 11.Felix: (to Kimball) ...Okay, yeah, he has so much concussion.
- Tucker telling Donut that he's doing a great job as The Leader and that he could even re-learn a few things from him? Surprisingly touching. An exasperated Tucker growling "Just take the compliment, you angsty bitch" when Donut hesitates over accepting the praise? Utterly hilarious.
- Donut's Oh, Crap! reaction once Genkins leaves the Meta.
- Chrovos: "But I no longer need that little orgy because you have utterly... FUCKED ME!"
Killing Time
- Wash's annoyance at not being shot. A confused Locus tells him to not get hit.
- Sarge is dejected at hearing his past self ("Is that how I sound?").
- Locus slaughtering the Zealots turns Kaikaina on.
- As a cover-up for him not coming with them, Wash tells the past version of Sarge he's gonna take the chaingun from the Pelican. An impressed Sarge says "If he's single, there's no hope for any of us!"
- Grif pranks Simmons into slamming himself on the portal. Simmons in turn discovers bullets go through.
- "Fool me thrice, shame on me again, point taken. But four times..."
- Donut's response when Chrovos immediately starts monologuing about how she'd "tear the starry curtain from its rings" after having tried to convince him that she's now on his side:Donut: (completely deadpan) Wow. It's a miracle. She's totally changed. Gee. But I wonder how I ever doubted her.
- Caboose telling Chrovos "Thank you, spooky nightmare."
- Chrovos' response when Donut questions what really is the present right now since the Reds and Blues (aside from himself, who's in Chrovos' prison room with her) are all "time-locked" in Temple's underwater base.
- Genkins going full on Evil Is Hammy when he goes back to ensure the second paradox happens (Church surviving his first death), complete with trash talking Sheila and even shouting Tucker's Bow Chicka Wow Wow Catchphrase.Genkins: Hello, history! Let's fucking dance!
- Simmons remembers shooting at Grif through the portal, and of course Sarge suggests them doing just that.
- To ensure Church's first death still plays out, Genkins in his body is distracted... and then the golf club is inserted into Sheila's cannon, leading to him getting Impaled with Extreme Prejudice. Virtually everyone is taken aback by this method working... except for Sarge, Caboose, and Tucker, that is.Sarge: Now that's what I call a hole-in-one!
Caboose: The graphics are awful!
Tucker: That was awesome!
Omphalos
- Wash uncertainly refers to the FOTUS-helmeted guards in his Labyrinth illusion as "minotaurs." Caboose tries to correct him with "Uh, I think that one horn makes them 'unitards'. It's French."
- Sarge, dreaming of office life, tries to drink out of a mug. With his helmet on. Predictably, it doesn't work.
- Grif's nightmare has him with a mad P.E. instructor named "Coach Prestwood." Prestwood then forces Grif to run through what's essentially a Wipeout course turned up to eleven.
- What makes the whole scene even funnier is how several commenters have pointed out the Dramatic Irony of Geoff Ramsey's character being forced through a Wipeout course.
- Lopez speaking English with Spanish subtitles, which means everyone can understand his insults, and thus he quickly ostracized by the other Reds. And even worse, he's not Red Team's robot, but Gustavo (who looks like a washing machine with cardboard and a rifle poorly duct-taped to it) is.
- As it turns out, Doc had ended up in Chrovos' chamber with Donut the whole time. He was just politely waiting until Donut and Chrovos were done talking before revealing himself.
Theogeny
- Grif's attempt to Face Death with Dignity:Coach Prestwood: Nice score on the Labyrinth's leaderboard. What should I put as your initials?
Grif: My last request... is that it be: A... S... S. - Donut saving Grif from Coach Prestwood: "I heard you needed to beat a guy off, and I came right away!"
- Word of God, this moment actually wasn't Innocent Innuendo, and it was actually Donut Trolling Grif by intentionally making a Double Entendre! What makes it even better is that according to
- Chrovos' very apathetic turn as the Big Good for Donut and the other members of the Blood Gulch Crew in the Labyrinth.Grif: (after Donut saves him) Fuck! What is happening?!
Chrovos: (dismissively, through a Time Portal) You were about to kill yourself.
Grif: I was? Wait — Are you on our side now?
Chrovos: You may want to hurry and stop your friends from dying, I don't know what side I'm on. - Sarge's surprised reaction when Wash and Doc save him from his Labyrinth illusion (which has him stuck at the Normandy landings): "Whoa, why are you guys in Normandy? Cheese tasting? Cider? The Bayeux Tapestry?"
- Simmons being chased around by an UFO seeking to "utilize his penis for scientific experiments" in his Labyrinth illusion is so absolutely hysterical (especially when compared to the other illusions given to his teammates) that Grif and Kaikaina drop the seriousness and start laughing before they free him, with Grif filming it.
- And when Simmons reunites with the others, the first thing he says is a cheery "Still got my penis!" Wash is understandably confused.
- Both Sarge and Grif immediately trying to get out of helping rescue Carolina from whatever terrfying horror she's suffering through in her Labyrinth illusion.
- Caboose easily broke out of his illusion without even realizing it was trying to kill him. At most, he's hungry for pancakes.
- Speaking of Caboose, there's the fact that when the Blood Gulch Crew arrive as The Cavalry for Carolina during her duel with her past self, he's actually holding Past!Carolina up with finger guns while everyone else is actually armed.
- Carolina's line of good-natured Self-Deprecation once the Labyrinth A.I reveals itself to everyone.Labyrinth A.I: I have failed to do my duty.
Kaikaina: Your duty was to skulk around in the dark and kill people!
Carolina: No wonder this thing made a convincing me. - At the end of the episode, Lopez shows back up, having witnessed some really serious shit since the beginning of time. And as Sarge muses aloud, "You know, it's a real shame I don't speak Spanish."
Other
- Wash's enraged Skyward Scream in "The Not-So-Good-Ol' Days" was Jason Weight's favorite joke of the season, mainly due to why it was included: Miles Luna wrote that episode, and never once thought of having Wash just travel to the point in time where he and Carolina were friends. When Weight suggested this, Luna's reaction was... basically the same as Wash's.
- This tweet from Jason Weight (the season's writer).Jason Weight: Red Vs Blue means an opportunity to fuck with every motherfucker who tries to write Donut after me. This gorgeous jewel is mine. The fans will kill you for dishonouring him.
- The Blooper Reel, which was even released officially in the Rooster Teeth Animation channel.