"Let's teach you the seven habits of highly eviscerated people."
"Oh, goddamn it, how did you get out? We're gonna have to do something about those hamstrings."
"I gave you a chance, didn't I? Didn't old Rick try to give you a hand? Well I can't help somebody who doesn't want to be helped. You're fired."
"Should have cut his feet first, amateur move."
Shortly before Trager appears, Miles can find one of his "files," written after the disaster that wrecked the asylum and let the Variants loose. Trager describes his murders as "slimming back personnel" for cost savings, admits to being "new to this whole 'doctor' thing," and confirms that "now I can say with absolute certainty that a person can't live without his kidneys."
After Miles kills Trager by trapping him between floors with an elevator, he writes a sarcastic note if you view the corpse with the camera on how to make "Trager Juice."
"Step one: Squeeze."
In the sewer level, if you go into a certain locker, Chris Walker will check the one next to it, see there's nothing inside, close it.... and open it again. Yes, he checked the same locker twice. Because why not. Well, the Walrider can appear out of nowhere, so having something in there could be possible.
In the Courtyard level, there's a shed where you need to retrieve a key. Don't all those metal tools on the wall look like delightful ways to defend yourself? Too bad you can't pick them up. Just to make sure you get the memo, though, that chainsaw you see up on a shelf? No, that's not real—someone drew on the shelf with chalk. Yeah, Red Barrels' developers really trolled you that hard.
Miles: I wake up and some doughy old man with a face like an alcoholic kiddy fiddler in a homemade priest outfit calls me his Apostle. Not a job I asked for.
Miles:(Trager) talks like a white collar business school douchebag, probably has a set of golf clubs in the trunk of his Audi.
Miles: The man sounds like Dr. Strangelove's anemic brother.
Miles: I can't believe Father Martin one-upped Jesus Christ himself in shitty ways to die.
Miles: I know I've said it before, but fuck this place. I've still got those fingers left.
There's a brief moment in the game where Miles just barely misses a jump, causing the floor to collapse, also causing him to drop his camera. As you watch it slip through the floor, Miles feebly lowers his arm, as if thinking "Well, shit."
At one point Miles is being flanked by a duo of bad guys, so he climbs out the window and shimmies across to escape them. Their incredibly deadpan sarcasm is pretty amusing:
Brother One: My God, he vanished. Brother Two: Vanished without a trace. Brother One: I detect sarcasm. Brother Two: It was my intention.
They even point out that Miles must think that they're stupid. Even better, they don't bother reaching out the window to grab him or wait around. It's like they're indulging him like a kid! ... Which is also kind of horrifying, but still.
The twins' nudity seems to be a spreading trend. When you get close to Father Martin in one of the final levels, and encounter his flock praying in their rooms, not a single one of them is wearing pants. This appears to have been entirely voluntary, as you can always spot pants hanging over a nearby chair in the same room. Maybe it's a tradition of his church?
In a rather Gallows Humor sense, upon pressing the elevator button in the lobby at the beginning of the game, a screaming inmate is dropped from somewhere far above you down the elevator shaft. It's an achievement in the Xbox One version.
When Miles is navigating through the Prison Block, he comes face-to-face with all sorts of disturbing and gory imagery thanks to the Variants... And then there's a guy who calls out to you from behind an impassable gate, but when you confront him and he realizes that you're not who he's looking for, he trails off shyly before turning around and fleeing awkwardly into the distance.
When Miles encounters the Walrider for the first time, if the player is fast enough, he responds by slamming the door in its face.
In Whistleblower, you hear an inmate banging threateningly behind the door in front of you. Open it up and the inmate stares at you menacingly... before turning around and proceeding to hammer his head on the other door.
You gotta admit, the way Eddie in Whistleblower decorated his lair can have these moments. Written on the walls are cutesy little sayings you'd find on a home decor sign ("Welcome Home," "Love makes a house a home," "If mama's not happy, nobody's happy," "A woman's work is never done," etc.) ...written inblood.
When he's hoisting Waylon up on a pulley to hang him from the ceiling, Eddie quips, "If this is you on the honeymoon, I'd hate to imagine our anniversary!" Not to mention he says that Waylon is heavier than he looks, which Trager also said to Miles when picking him up to strap him into a wheelchair.
This journal entry by Miles for its spectacular descriptions:
Miles: I'm already beat all to hell, picking broken glass out of my scalp, couple cracked ribs. Nearly killed by a deformed giant, looks like somebody tried to fuck-start his head with a cheese grater. He throws me through a wall, knocks me unconscious. I wake up and some doughy old man with a face like an alcoholic kiddy fiddler in a homemade priest outfit calls me his Apostle. Not a job I asked for. There are words scrawled in blood everywhere. I'm getting an ugly feeling in my gut that the "Priest" is writing them, and for my benefit.
If you're one for Black Comedy, at one point in Whistleblower, you come across a bunch of inmates playing basketball with a human head. Then once you interrupt them, they're indignant about you interrupting their pickup game.
"Shirts and skins or fuck off!"
Near the end of Whistleblower one can find a poster telling Murkoff staff what to do in the event of an evacuation order. The list is fairly standard stuff like not using the elevator, proceeding outdoors in an orderly manner...except for the last one, which simply says, "Don't cry."
"What, you like to watch?! That's sick. You're sick!"
A similar one happens in Whistleblower, where you find a variant masturbating over a bunch of bloodied corpses. He proceed to call you a sicko too for watching once he realizes you're there... without actually stopping.
In Issue 2 of The Murkoff Account, Pauline realizes Trager roofied her. After forcing him to ingest a full drink of his own drug, the scene cuts to her staring at Trager's coke stash. Cue Pauline counter-drugging herself to high heaven on cocaine, eyes wide, with Motor Mouth.
In Issue 3, Paul comes up with this gem to discredit Waylon:
In Issue 4, after pissing off something bad and having to burn a swarm of hostile ants off of himself, Marion ends up chasing down Simon Peacock in his underwear.
And Trager.