Film / Up Pompeii

Ludicrus Sextus: Ah, Lurcio, how do you think it went?

Lurcio: Master, you've brought the house down.

— Ludicrus Sextus and Lurcio discussing the former's speech during the eruption of Mount Vesuvius.

Up Pompeii is a 1971 film and the first film spin-off of Up Pompeii. It stars Frankie Howerd, Patrick Cargill, Bill Fraser, Michael Hordern, Barbara Murray, Lance Percival, Adrienne Posta, Bernard Bresslaw, Roy Hudd, and Julie Ege.

Lurcio (Howerd) - slave of Ludicrus Sextus (Hordern), Ammonia (Murray), Erotica (Madeline Smith), and Nausius (Royce Mills) - is helping to plan for his master's latest orgy before the arrival of Emperor Nero (Cargill), when the soothsayer Cassandra (Rita Webb) warns of great trouble to come. This is more true than people realise, as Captain Bilius (Percival) is plotting with Prosperus Maximus (Fraser), Odius (Ian Trigger), and Villanus (Aubrey Woods) to have Nero assassinated and replaced by Proseperus Maximus. He has a scroll with the names of all those who plan to assassinate Nero but ends up losing it in the marketplace, where it is picked up by Lurcio and discovered by him and fellow slave Scrubba (Posta).

Before Captain Bilius can recover the scroll, it ends up in the hands of Ludicrus Sextus, who nearly ends up reading it to the Senate. To keep himself from being caught, Prosperus Maximus plots with his wife, Lady Voluptua (Ege), to catch her having it off with Ludicrus Sextus so he can kill him without suspicion, however they are overheard by their slave girl, Flavia (Laraine Humphrys), who informs Lurcio and Nausius who come to his rescue. Lurcio is then arrested and ends up being forced to wrestle with Nero's champion, Gorgo (Bresslaw), which Nero and his M.C. (Hudd) find highly amusing until Lurcio manages to win the match and become Nero's new champion.

Nero, knowing of the plot on his life, orders Lurcio to kill Prosperus Maximus, who in turn Blackmails Lurcio to kill Nero. Lurcio decides to do both, and Hilarity Ensues as Mount Vesuvius is ready to erupt.

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Tropes in this Film:

• Abhorrent Admirer: A woman at Ludicrus Sextus' orgy grabs hold of Nausius and takes him away, much to his horror.
• Affectionate Nickname: Lurcio calls Nausius "Naus".
• All There in the Script: Some characters' names are only given in the end credits:
  • The stallholder who Lurcio discusses Ludicrus Sextus' latest orgy with is called "Vinus".
  • The woman who tries to have it off with Nausius at Ludicrus Sextus' orgy is called "Plumpa".
  • The woman who tries to seduce Captain Bilius in the steam baths is called "Boobia".
  • The woman getting a massage in the steam baths is called "Biggia".
• Ambiguously Human: After seeing Gorgo, Lurcio doesn't believe that a man that big and menacing could be human:
  Lurcio: Is he human?
  Captain Bilius: Almost. That's Gorgo the Invincible.
• Anachronism Stew:
  • The film has the destruction of Pompeii occur before both the death of Nero and the Great Fire of Rome.
  • Lurcio somehow knows what a hamster wheel is, despite that not being invented until at least 1929.
• An Arm and a Leg: Gorgo threatens to rip off Lurcio's arms during their wrestling match.
• Aside Glance: Lurcio gives one to the audience after reading the word "Venus" in Nausius' second ode to Flavia, believing that the upcoming rhyming word will be "penis".
• Ass Shove: Lurcio asks a Christian who survived being thrown to the lions if Nero has his thumb up, before stumbling over his words when he recognises the Double Entendre.
• Astonishingly Appropriate Interruption: When Lurcio is telling the audience what happened after Ludicrus Sextus' last orgy:
  Lurcio: Do you know? Clearing up after the last one, I came across a couple, left over from the orgy before. You'll never guess what the woman was saying to the man...
  Man: Come on, hurry up! I got others waitin'!
  Lurcio: 'Ow did you know? (Beat) Oh, I see, yes, sorry.
• Attractive Bent-Gender: The jailer sees Lurcio disguised as Scrubba and tries to have it off with him.
• Bait-and-Switch: It seems as if Lurcio is Nature Tinkling in the garden until he reveals a watering can to the audience.
• Bathtub Scene:
  • We first see Ammonia when Lurcio is providing the bubbles for her bath, and she has another which is interrupted during the destruction of Pompeii.
  • Rumpus walks in on Erotica during a bath:
    Rumpus: No, don't scream.
    Erotica: I won't if you promise to stay.
• Beef Bandage: After seeing the jailer's black eye, Lurcio taunts him to put some steak on it.
• Big Guy, Little Guy: Big Villanus and little Odius, Prosperus Maximus' strong-arm men.
• Bite of Affection:
  • One of the items left behind at Ludicrus Sextus' orgy is a chastity belt with teeth marks in it.
  • When Ammonia sees Captain Bilius after Ludicrus Sextus' orgy:
    Ammonia: Oh, that's very sweet of you. Do come in for a little bite.
    Captain Bilius: Thank you, milady, I'm not hungry.
    Ammonia: Oh, who said anything about food?
• Black Comedy Rape:
  • An unwilling Nausius is dragged away by a woman at Ludicrus Sextus' orgy.
  • When Nero is bored, Prosperus Maximus tries to entice him by telling him of the evening's grand pageant depicting the rape of the Sabine women, with genuine rapists.
• Blackface: Lurcio covers his body in black makeup to disguise himself as a Nubian eunuch.
• Blackmail: Prosperus Maximus tells Lurcio that if he doesn't kill Nero, he'll cut off his gizzard and fling it to the crows.
• Breaking the Fourth Wall: Just like the TV series, Lurcio frequently turns to the audience to make witty remarks and Double Entendres:
  Lurcio: Oh, what a time to go. Halfway through the picture. Now I shall never know 'ow it ends.
• Breakfast in Bed: When the jailer gives Lurcio his bread and water, he sarcastically calls it breakfast in bed.
• Brick Joke: When the giant narrator Lurcio introduces the residents of Prosperus Maximus' palace, Villanus slices his giant finger with his sword. When we next see the narrator Lurcio, he has a bandage around his finger.
• Brief Accent Imitation: Lurcio uses a deep voice to trick Prosperus Maximus into thinking he ran off further into the steam baths.
• Buxom Beauty Standard:
  • Titta's appeal comes from her large breasts:
    Procuria: Now this one I can really recommend. She's called "Titta".
    Lurcio: I'm not surprised. Well, don't point them at me, dear. They might go off.
  • Nausius compliments Flavia's bosom in his ode to her.
• Cassandra Truth: Cassandra herself warns of the destruction of Pompeii, but no one believes her.
• Comedic Underwear Exposure: When Nero inspects Lurcio after he has become his newest champion, Lurcio worries that his slip is showing.
• Cover Innocent Eyes and Ears: When the tour guide shows his tour group the notorious Pompeiian murals, one of the men covers a woman's eyes with his map, only for her to pull it away and keep looking.
• Crossdresser: One woman with her breasts out at Ludicrus Sextus' orgy is actually a fella according to Lurcio.
• Demoted to Extra: Ammonia, Nausius, and Erotica in the film compared to the series - only Ammonia's actress (Barbara Murray) is given star billing, and even then, Nausius (as small as his role is) is the only one of the three who contributes to the plot in a meaningful way.
• Disguised in Drag: Scrubba switches clothes with Lurcio in order to allow him to escape the condemned cell.
• Distant Finale: The film ends with a Pompeii tour guide (also played by Frankie Howerd, implying Lurcio survived) telling a tour group about the Pompeii disaster and showing them the preserved bodies of the cast.
• "Do It Yourself" Theme Tune: The theme was sung by Frankie Howerd in character as Lurcio.
• Ear Ache: Gorgo twists Lurcio's ear during their wrestling match.
• Epic Fail: Lurcio and the Christians build a Trojan Horse to escape the condemned cell, however, it isn't until they give it to the jailer that they realise they forgot to get inside it.
• "Everybody Dies" Ending: The film ends with the destruction of Pompeii which kills the entire cast, although Lurcio is implied to have lived and had children by the epilogue.
• Fauxreigner: Lurcio disguises himself as a Nubian eunuch to sneak through the slave's entrance and try and stop Voluptua from getting Ludicrus Sextus killed.
• Fictional Document: The Daily Tablet, a newspaper scroll read by the citizens of Pompeii.
• Fingore: When the giant narrator Lurcio is introducing the residents of Prosperus Maximus' palace, Villanus sees his giant finger and swipes at it with his sword.
• Foregone Conclusion: Seeing how Pompeii was most famous for its volcanic destruction, and how the film had the budget to show it off, audiences expected the film to end with the eruption of Mount Vesuvius. The film's trailer even prominently shows it off, several times!
• The Foreign Subtitle: In Greece, the film was released as Up Pompeii, the City of Orgies.
• Freudian Threat: To ensure that Lurcio kills Nero, Prosperus Maximus warns him that if he doesn't, then he'll cut off his gizzard and fling it to the crows.
• Gasshole: Ludicrus Sextus burps after drinking some wine at breakfast, and also while giving his speech on vices.
• Gender-Blender Name: Lurcio's donkey has the feminine name of Betty yet is a male.
• Hand-or-Object Underwear: Rumpus uses his shield to cover his groin at Ludicrus Sextus' orgy and after returning from Erotica's bath.
• Hangover Sensitivity: After Ludicrus Sextus' orgy, he is left with a hangover that makes even a fly's buzzing too loud for him.
• Have We Met?: During Lurcio and Gorgo's wrestling match, they slowly come to the realisation that they were in the same Slave Galley many years ago.
• Hypocritical Humour: Ludicrus Sextus wants to stamp out debauchery in Pompeii yet has no problem throwing lavish orgies.
• Identical Grandson: The tour guide at the end of the film is also played by Frankie Howerd, to imply that Lurcio survived the destruction of Pompeii.
• Immediate Self-Contradiction: When Ludicrus Sextus is trying to get the jailer to let Lurcio go free:
  Ludicrus Sextus: Well, if you could see your way... to letting him get away.
  Jailer: Wait a minute. Do I look like the sort of man who would accept a bribe?
  Ludicrus Sextus: Well, yes, you do, actually.
  Jailer: You're dead right.
• Interrupted Intimacy: Erotica and Prodigius' make-out session is interrupted by her father, Ludicrus Sextus.
• Ironic Name: Lurcio points out the irony of Ludicrus Sextus to the audience:
  Lurcio: This is my master, Ludicrus Sextus. All "tus" and no "sex".
• It Will Never Catch On: Nero claims bingo will never catch on in Rome after losing to Captain Bilius.
• It's All About Me: When reading about Ludicrus Sextus' orgy in The Daily Tablet, Ammonia complains that they didn't mention the costume she was wearing.
• Kinky Spanking: Lurcio threatens to spank an insolent Scrubba, who is more excited than anything at the idea:
  Lurcio: Don't be cheeky, I'll smack your bottom.
  Scrubba: Promise?
• Mad Oracle: Taking the place of Senna the soothsayer from the TV series is Cassandra, who like her predecessor is a mad old woman with long grey hair and a tendency to go off onto rants about imminent deaths and disasters.
• Malaproper: When Lurcio and Scrubba discuss the scroll they have found:
  Scrubba: What's this, then? A rolling pin?
  Lurcio: "A rolling pin"? My poor, simple, ignorant girl, what does it look like? It's one of those symbols, isn' it? "Psychic".
  Scrubba: You mean "phallic"?
• Male Gaze: When we first meet Scrubba, the camera zooms in on her breasts:
  Lurcio: I say, do you mind? You'll see plenty more of those later on.
• Man Bites Man:
  • When trying to escape Captain Bilius at Ludicrus Sextus' orgy, Lurcio dives into a pile of people and bites one when one of their body parts gets right in his face.
  • Before Lurcio and Gorgo's wrestling match, the M.C. warns no biting... except with the teeth.
• Marshmallow Hell: Noxius buries his face in Erotica's breasts during Ludicrus Sextus' orgy:
  Noxius: Oh, Erotica. I do love this place. And this place! And this place!
• Meaningful Name:
  • Voluptua, Titta, Boobia, and Biggia all have large breasts.
  • Scrubba is a pretty, young, promiscuous girl, while "Scrubber" is slang for a tart.
  • Villanus, or "villainous", which fits such a menacing strong-arm man involved in the plot to assassinate Nero.
  • Rumpus, similar to "rumpy pumpy" which suits an attendant at Ludicrus Sextus' orgy.
  • Sutra, named for the Karma Sutra, fitting of someone trained in all the erotic arts of the East.
  • Plumpa is on the heavy side.
• Mistaken for Gay:
  • Lurcio worries Nausius has "turned" after he shows no interest at Ludicrus Sextus' orgy.
  • When Captain Bilius tries to get Lurcio to give him the scroll, Lurcio assumes he's trying to pick him up.
• Mondegreen Gag: When Lurcio and the Christian plan how to escape from the condemned cell:
  Christian: 'Ere, what about the Trojan 'Orse.
  Lurcio: Why, what do they do? (Beat) Oh, the Trojan Horse, yes!
• The Movie: This was the first film spin-off of Up Pompeii.
• Murder by Mistake: Odius mistakes Villanus for Lurcio in the steam baths and plunges a dagger into his back, killing him. Prosperus Maximus wanders in on him and then does the same, killing Odius.
• Naked Freak-Out: When Lurcio steals a girl's towel in the steam bath, she screams and runs away fully nude.
• Nature Tinkling: It seems as if Lurcio is doing this on some plants until he reveals a watering can:
  Lurcio: Well, what do you think I was doing? Oh, well, I wasn't. I were watering the garden.
• Plot Hole:
  • Lurcio tells Captain Bilius that he didn't read the incriminating scroll because he never learned to read, but he is able to read Nausius' odes without issue.
  • During the climax, Erotica is in the steam baths with one of her X lovers, but once the destruction of Pompeii begins, she is back home.
• Public Bathhouse Scene: Lurcio goes to the steam baths to kill Prosperus Maximus (as ordered by Nero) and Nero (due to Prosperus Maximus' Blackmail). Lurcio gets lost in all the steam and has to dart through the baths being pursued by Prosperus Maximus, Captain Bilius, Odius, and Villanus who are all trying to kill him. Hiding in amongst large-breasted women and old, sweaty, fat men, Lurcio manages to avoid them long enough to make it out unharmed.
• Pun:
  • When Nausius tells Lurcio he has lost his heart to Flavia:
    Lurcio: "Flavia", I see. What "Flavia"? Vanilla?
  • When a statue's penis sprays wine on Captain Bilius:
    Lurcio: Oh, well. He's used to being made a convenience of.
  • Lurcio calls the jailer a "pain in the nick":
    Lurcio: Oh, I know it's corny, but could you think of anything better at a time like this?
  • Ludicrus Sextus asks for his listeners to lend him their arches in a speech, as he wants their support.
  • Before Captain Bilius can kill Lurcio, a column comes crashing down on his head and knocks him out. Lurcio calls it a relief column.
  • When Scrubba falls down a hole during the destruction of Pompeii, Lurcio remarks that he always knew she was a drop-out.
• Punny Name:
  • Virginia, or "virgin".
  • Noxius, or "noxious" like toxic gas.
  • Prosperus Maximus' palace is on the corner of the veer Poofus.
    Lurcio: It's rather a queer street, that.
• Really Gets Around:
  • Erotica, living up to her name:
    Lurcio: This is Erotica, daughter, and she's just been with one of her X lovers. "X" being the Latin word for "ten".
  • Lurcio calls Voluptua "the original good time, had by all".
• Revised Ending: The film was originally to end with Lurcio accepting his fate during the destruction of Pompeii and wandering off into the chaos. Director Bob Kellett found this too downbeat, and so added the ending with a Pompeii tour guide also played by Frankie Howerd to imply that Lurcio made it out alive and had children.
• Same Language Dub: Julie Ege was dubbed over by Sheila Steafel.
• Screw the Rules, I Have Money!: Ludicrus Sextus bribes the jailer to free Lurcio from the condemned cell.
• Sex for Services: How Scrubba gets the jailer to let her see Lurcio:
  Scrubba: I was looking for the prisoner, Lurcio.
  Jailer: He's in there, but if I let you in to see him, er, well, what's in it for me?
  Scrubba: That's up to you, isn't it?
• Shirtless Scene:
  • Lurcio has one when he is disguised as a Nubian eunuch.
  • Lurcio, Prosperus Maximus, Odius, and Villanus all go shirtless in the steam baths.
• Shout-Out:
  • Ammonia is known to gardeners everywhere as "the last of the red-hot pokers", a play on the novel Last of the Red Hot Lovers.
  • From the ending theme:
    And they're quite at home at the hippodrome
    You can choose who you prefer
    Coz Ben Him looks like Ben-Hur.
• Slave Galley: During their wrestling match, Lurcio has a Have We Met? moment with Gorgo. He doesn't recognize Gorgo at first, and Gorgo only realizes when he sees the back of his head. He sat behind him in the galley, so that's all he saw of him for all those years, but he would recognize it anywhere after that.
• Snark-to-Snark Combat: Between Lurcio and the jailer when Lurcio has been imprisoned:
  Jailer: Here's yer bread. An' here's yer water. There, I'm spoiling you, aren't I?
  Lurcio: Yes, you are. Aren't I fortunate? Breakfast in Bed!
  Jailer: Well, make yerself at home.
• Sore Loser: After losing at bingo, Nero complains and calls it a stupid game.
• Steven Ulysses Perhero: Procuria. "Procure" means to obtain something, which makes sense for a slave trader.
• Subverted Rhyme Every Occasion:
  • In Nausius' first ode to Flavia:
    Lurcio: "Ode to Flavia". How sweet. "I love her face, that bosom fair, that skin without a ripple. But most of all, I love to lie, with my lips upon her left shoulder".
    Nausius: I can't think of a rhyme for "ripple".
    Lurcio: Well, he's the only one who can't.
  • In Nausius' second ode to Flavia:
    Lurcio: "I hereby vow to do my all, to you, most beauteous Venus". (Beat) "All that I own, my heart and soul, and half a yard of gold brocade"?
    Nausius: Yes, yes, I know it doesn't rhyme, but it's for her wedding gown, you see.
• Sultry Belly Dancer: One appears at Ludicrus Sextus' orgy.
• Suspiciously Similar Substitute: In the TV series, the local woe-telling soothsayer was Senna (played by Jeanne Mockford), but in the film, she has been replaced with the mythical seer Cassandra (played by Rita Webb).
• Tagline: "FRANKIE in an orgy of LAUGHTER!".
• Take Our Word for It: Used and then Inverted. References are made to some erotic frescoes in the ruins of Pompeii, but they cannot be seen. Then, in the final scene, the tour guide gives in and says "Alright then, go on, go on" and the frescoes are shown over the closing credits.
• Talk to the Fist: Lurcio punches the jailer in the eye for trying to have his way with him.
• That Came Out Wrong:
  • Lurcio trying to tell the audience what he does for Ammonia:
    Lurcio: I say "mistress", I mean don't I mean we... well I don't mean I... er, well... I mean I serve her. (Beat) No, no, I mean, um, I try to give her satisfaction, I- Oh, form your own opinion.
  • When Lurcio asks a Christian how he survived being thrown to the lions:
    Lurcio: Oh, what happened? Did Nero have his thumb up? (Beat) I'll rephrase that.
• Those Two Guys: Odius and Villanus, Prosperus Maximus' two strong-arm men, are never seen apart from each other.
• Undercrank: Played for Laughs when people are trying to escape the Senate during the eruption of Mount Vesuvius.
• Visible Boom Mic: When Lurcio is confronted by the guards, the shadow of a camera can be seen.
• Visual Pun:
  • When Scrubba is helping Lurcio in the kitchen, he gives her some onions and a cucumber to hold, but the way he puts them in her hands resembles male genitalia.
  • Lurcio mentions he'll have to keep an eye on an undressed girl he finds after Ludicrus Sextus' orgy while holding a glass eye:
    Lurcio: "Eye", huh. (Beat) Oh, please yourself.
• V-Sign:
  • The tour guide ends his tour with one.
  • Cartoon versions feature prominently in the trailer, most notably replacing the "U" in the film's title.
• What Happened to the Mouse?: When Nero rides into Pompeii, he is with a pretty girl... who promptly disappears from the film after her first scene.

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