Ultimate Marvel/Transformers crossover by The Writer With No Name, composed of two fics.
Optimal Advice
comes just a bit of a while after the clone incident and Peter Parker's breakup with Kitty Pryde. Peter is feeling very down. With his emotions and faith at an all time low, Peter wanders around and suddenly finds himself at his favorite childhood place: A memorial dedicated to the Autobots, who fought the Decepticons alongside humanity in the battle of New York 16 years ago. With nothing to lose, Peter smiles and does what he used to do as a kid: have a little mental chat with bronze Optimus Prime to ask for, well, some optimal advice.
Of course, the world being as it is, his chat isn't EXACTLY as private as he thought it would be...
More Than Meets The Eye comes a few months later. As Peter gets ready to buy his first car, mysterious meteors begin to crash onto earth, causing unrest for everyone involved, while Peter himself hears rumors of "ghost cars". Trust his Parker luck to dictate that he buys a particular 1975 Camaro that constantly disappears without a trace and humiliates his every day bullies.
The fact that every car window at Bobby Bolivia's shattered except this one's probably should've clued him in.
It also combines elements from Transformers: Generation 1 and Transformers Film Series.
The fics provide examples of:
- Attack Pattern Alpha: "Transform and Roll Out!" and "Decepticons ATTACK!" as usual.
- Badass Creed: The usual "Till all are one" is here. And then there's the long one recited at Jazz's death.
- Badass Normal: Sam Witwicky, yes the same one from the movies, still manages to help Spidey by sawing off Frenzy's head. He's a physics teacher! Though he prefers to be called Spike.
- Composite Character: The entire Cybertronian cast of the 2007 film are composited with their G1 counterparts, as well as Sam Witwicky being Composited with Spike.
- Crisis Crossover: Spider-Man, the X-Men, The Ultimates, the Fantastic 4, the Autobots and S.H.I.E.L.D. all have to work together if there's gonna be any hope of beating the Decepticons.
- Decomposite Character: Sam's role from the film is divided between Peter and Mary Jane, with Peter being the one who purchased Bumblebee, while MJ was the granddaughter of the explorer who discovered the frozen Cybertronian in the arctic.
- Said Cybertronian is Alpha Trion instead of Megatron
- Fantastic Racism: As usual, anti-mutant sentiments are a staple here, but Senator Kelly also hates all Transformers, including the Autobots. The Decepticons themselves hate all organics.
- Fling a Light into the Future: Alpha Trion met MJ's grandfather instead of Megatron, hoping that The Autobots would decipher it.
- Fusion Fic: Combines elements from G1 and the first live-action film, with interesting changes.
- Gosh Darn It to Heck!: A side-effect of the Transformers' own spin of our language, many swears are instead harmlessly little more than engineer speak.
- Heroic Sacrifice: Unlike in the live-action movie, Jazz gets this instead of receiving a Curb-Stomp Battle.
- Hold Your Hippogriffs: The Transformers substitute many words in the English language with machine-speak.
- Hulk Speak: The Dinobots, Devastator and, who else, the Hulk.
- Idiot Ball: The Decepticons’ efforts to infiltrate Earth and locate the Allspark are often hindered by their own impatience and view of organic life as inferior and disposable.
- Imaginary Friend: Ever since he was a kid, Peter has always talked to the statue of Optimus Prime when he was down, as he did in Optimal Advice.
- Iron Butt Monkey: Starscream takes an impressive amount of abuse over the course of the work, but ultimately lives through it and successfully deposes Megatron in the end.
- Not-So-Imaginary Friend: Of course, everyone who remembers the Autobots know Optimus is real, including Peter himself. But Peter didn't know that he was watching the whole time.
- Kirk Summation: Optimus, upon learning that Wilson Fisk is bartering with them for the Allspark.
- Mistreatment-Induced Betrayal: The surviving Decepticons, except for Soundwave, turn against Megatron after they escape Earth, since he was willing to let them all die just to get the Allspark. After Starscream disposes of Soundwave in a sneak-attack, nobody lifts a finger to stop him from throwing Megatron out of Astrotrain.
- Mythology Gag: The Autobots' human friend is Sam "Spike" Witwicky, which is the name he was credited as in the Spanish dub of the movie.
- Number Two: Elita-One is Optimus's second-in-command.
- The Starscream: The Trope Namer is present and accounted for and is also in rare form, pulling a coup off successfully and with implicit support of his comrades thanks to how callously Megatron treated all of them in pursuit of a goal that ultimately slipped through his fingers.Starscream: You should have left the treachery to me...because, as you can see, I'm much better at it.
- Third-Person Person: The Hulk, Devastator and the Dinobots. The Dinobots are a special case, as they say "Me (name)" to substitute for "I".
- Underestimating Badassery: One reason the Decepticons lose to the squishies. When the Decepticons first came, Earth was a planet of Red Shirts. When they returned, it became The Ultimate Marvel Universe.
- World of Snark: Nearly all the heroes and the Autobots can quip with the best of them.
