Moments pages are Spoilers Off. You Have Been Warned.
- In Chapter 4, during their new special training, Asuka discovers how Rei "Wondergirl" Ayanami lives, including her subpar living quarters and her regimen of emotional suppressants. Asuka is horrified by the revelation that being the Commander's "favorite" doesn't equate to being valued as a person; and that if NERV is doing this to Rei, they can do this to Shinji and Asuka, too. She's so shaken that she momentarily lets slip her mask in front of Rei ("I want to go home right now, Shinji."), and later holds onto Shinji begging him not to let that happen. Shinji, for his part, is thrown for a loop from seeing Asuka this vulnerable, but reaffirms that they'll look out for each other.
- In Chapter 8, the fic goes into Gendo's head, and we see how broken and damaged he is beneath the Bastard Crust. After Shinji recovers Hikari from the core of Unit-03, he is driving himself batshit crazy trying to figure out how it was done and wondering whether it means there might be a way to get Yui out of Unit-01. It is even sadder when you ponder, as Fuyutsuki does, that maybe Yui does not want to be rescued.
- Chapter 8:
- Misato admits to Kaji that she's jealous Shinji and Asuka, who have in spite of everything managed to come together and are happy as a result, while she and Kaji still haven't fully broken down the barriers between them.
Damn it, Kaji! Now that they're not play-acting and trying to hide it at home, they practically glow when they look at each other! Since their little reveal, I don't think I've seen them apart for more than a few minutes or when I send them to sleep in their rooms separately. Which as far as I can tell they are keeping to. They're serious about this, totally in love with each other, and Hell yes I'm envious! Two screwed-up teenagers have apparently got their heads on straight and their love lives figured out; why can't we?- Rei's psychographs are getting normal again, so Ritsuko decides to increase the dosage of Rei's meds, which she had taken herself off of without the doctor's knowledge. Naturally, Rei gets a severe benzodiazepine overdose. But before that, we see that Rei is internally panicking, wanting to avoid it yet not being able to.
- Reeling from the revelation that her mother killed the first Rei clone, Ritsuko is in despair, and contemplating suicide. The author had originally intended for Ritsuko to only drown her sorrows with wine…but given that she was also injured and on medication thanks to the berserk event, the result was Ritsuko Akagi at her lowest point. The only thing keeping it from being completely depressing is that at the end of this section, Ritsuko managed to call someone for help, later revealed to be Rei.
- Shinji talks to his mother in the core... and it's not the happy reunion he imagined it to be. He learns that SEELE is planning to become gods by assimilating all humanity, that they caused Second Impact, and that both his parents and his maternal grandparents were involved in it. By the time he's done, Shinji is wracked with the knowledge that his parents and grandparents are monstrous, and worry that it runs in his blood. Asuka assures Shinji that the sins of his family have no bearing on him, but it's with Rei and Misato that she's able to help Shinji pull himself together.
- Rei yelling at Kaworu after Asuka's birthday party. Not because she hates him, but the exact opposite. She knows that she'll have to kill him in the end, and liking him will just make it all the more painful.I don't want to have to kill a friend.
- Kaworu in general seems to be left out of the WAFF in the rest of the fic, this even feeding into his unconscious desire to fulfill his purpose. He's slowly being included, but his struggle with his Angelic desires are extremely strong, and he's desperately lonely and afraid of failing to resist the Call.
- Chapter 9: Rei is targeted by Arael. Especially the vision of Asuka and Shinji finding out about her true nature."We don't love Angels! We kill them!"
- Kaworu jumps in to save her...and promptly gets hit with his own side of Mind Rape. It ends with a vision of him killing Shinji, Asuka and Rei refusing to Mercy Kill him and letting the world be destroyed out of spite, and Rei telling him how much she hates him and how little she thinks of him.
Rei: Pathetic. I resisted my Call. What did I ever see in you?- And at the start of the next chapter, Rei is so shaken by the experience that she begs Ritsuko to drug her.
- Gendo reducing Shinji's defiant anger to terrified, gibbering acquiescence in ten seconds flat. He reveals that not only does he know about Shinji's relationship with Asuka, he has known from the beginning, and calmly assures Shinji that he can separate them both permanently if Shinji dares to cross him or disobey his orders again. Shinji immediately collapses, begging him not to do it.
- Shinji's anger returns when Gendo refuses to give a straight answer to questions about Yui. Gendo orders him out, and Shinji is dragged out by security staff screaming "You took her away from me!"
- Rei's Heroic Sacrifice at the end of chapter 10.I'm sorry.
- Asuka's breakdown after Shinji gets shot during the attempted assassination of the Pilots.
- Similarly, the event in question and its aftermath causes Kaworu to have even more trouble controlling his Call, to the point that he tries to convince Ritsuko to put him out of his misery.
- Rei's own breakdown is equally tragic, to the point that she says that she wishes she was still drugged so she wouldn't have to put up with all the emotional pain.
