"When you start milking poop for red hearts, you have to ask yourself: what separates us from the beasts?"
"My bum friend just gave me cancer, and I couldn't love him more for it!" note
— EpicNameBro
, "Binding of Isaac Noob Run (Spare me, Oh Merciful Lemmy!)"
, "Binding of Isaac Noob Run (Spare me, Oh Merciful Lemmy!)" Intro monologue
Isaac and his mother lived alone in a small house on a hill. Isaac kept to himself, drawing pictures and playing with his toys as his mom watched Christian broadcasts on the television.
Life was simple, and they were both happy. That was, until the day Isaac's mom heard a voice from above...
"Your son has become corrupted by sin! He needs to be saved!"
"I will do my best to save him, my Lord", Isaac's mother replied, rushing into Isaac's room, removing all that was evil from his life.
Again, the voice called to her...
"Isaac's soul is still corrupt! He needs to be cut off from all that is evil in this world and confess his sins."
"I will follow your instructions, Lord. I have faith in thee", Isaac's mother replied, as she locked Isaac away in his room, away from the evils of the world.
One last time, Isaac's mom heard the voice of God calling to her...
"You have done as I asked, but I still question your devotion to me. To prove your faith, I will ask one more thing of you."
"Yes, Lord. Anything," Isaac's mother begged.
"To prove your love and devotion, I require a sacrifice. Your son Isaac will be this sacrifice. Go into his room and end his life as an offering to me, to prove that you love me above all else!"
"Yes, Lord", she replied, grabbing a butcher's knife from the kitchen.
Isaac, watching through a crack in the door, trembled in fear. Scrambling around his room to find a hiding place, he noticed a trapdoor to the basement, hidden under his rug. Without hesitation, he flung open the hatch just as his mother burst through his door and threw himself down into the unknown depths below.
Life was simple, and they were both happy. That was, until the day Isaac's mom heard a voice from above...
"Your son has become corrupted by sin! He needs to be saved!"
"I will do my best to save him, my Lord", Isaac's mother replied, rushing into Isaac's room, removing all that was evil from his life.
Again, the voice called to her...
"Isaac's soul is still corrupt! He needs to be cut off from all that is evil in this world and confess his sins."
"I will follow your instructions, Lord. I have faith in thee", Isaac's mother replied, as she locked Isaac away in his room, away from the evils of the world.
One last time, Isaac's mom heard the voice of God calling to her...
"You have done as I asked, but I still question your devotion to me. To prove your faith, I will ask one more thing of you."
"Yes, Lord. Anything," Isaac's mother begged.
"To prove your love and devotion, I require a sacrifice. Your son Isaac will be this sacrifice. Go into his room and end his life as an offering to me, to prove that you love me above all else!"
"Yes, Lord", she replied, grabbing a butcher's knife from the kitchen.
Isaac, watching through a crack in the door, trembled in fear. Scrambling around his room to find a hiding place, he noticed a trapdoor to the basement, hidden under his rug. Without hesitation, he flung open the hatch just as his mother burst through his door and threw himself down into the unknown depths below.
The conversation during the Ascent
UPON PICKING UP DAD'S NOTE
Dad: I spent it! It's gone, just get over it!
Mom: What do you mean...? What do you mean "it's gone"...? How could you have spent our savings?!
ON DEPTHS I
Mom: He is self-destructive and disturbed just like his father!! Look at who he has to look up to! ...and you're drunk again, aren't you...?
Dad: SHUT UP, MAGGY! SHUT! UP!! You just keep pushing me like this, I'm leaving!
Mom: Good! LEAVE! We'll be fine without you! Abandon us like you abandoned yourself...!
ON CAVES I
Mom: You need to repent. You need to confess your sins, and become saved! Let His light inside you! Cleanse your soul!
Dad: You are insane! You are taking this too far! Can't you hear how you sound?
Mom: Pray with me! Pray for your salvation! Come, pray with us, Isaac...
ON BASEMENT I
(The sound of a door opening and footsteps heard)
Mom: ...where are you going?! Wait! We need you! Your son NEEDS you!
Dad: I'm doing more harm than good. I just can’t do this anymore. I'm sorry...
Mom: Please! Please, don't leave us!
Dad: (muffled) I'm sorry, Isaac...
Dad: I spent it! It's gone, just get over it!
Mom: What do you mean...? What do you mean "it's gone"...? How could you have spent our savings?!
ON DEPTHS I
Mom: He is self-destructive and disturbed just like his father!! Look at who he has to look up to! ...and you're drunk again, aren't you...?
Dad: SHUT UP, MAGGY! SHUT! UP!! You just keep pushing me like this, I'm leaving!
Mom: Good! LEAVE! We'll be fine without you! Abandon us like you abandoned yourself...!
ON CAVES I
Mom: You need to repent. You need to confess your sins, and become saved! Let His light inside you! Cleanse your soul!
Dad: You are insane! You are taking this too far! Can't you hear how you sound?
Mom: Pray with me! Pray for your salvation! Come, pray with us, Isaac...
ON BASEMENT I
(The sound of a door opening and footsteps heard)
Mom: ...where are you going?! Wait! We need you! Your son NEEDS you!
Dad: I'm doing more harm than good. I just can’t do this anymore. I'm sorry...
Mom: Please! Please, don't leave us!
Dad: (muffled) I'm sorry, Isaac...
Living in the Light (Dogma's Theme) "lyrics"
But if we are living in the light, as God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from all sin. If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves, and not living in the truth! But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.
And so I tell you, every kind of sin and slander will be forgiven, but blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven!
Impurity, lust, and evil desires,Don't be greedy, for a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world.
Because of these sins, THE ANGER OF GOD IS COMING!
No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear!
Fits of rage! Selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like! I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God!
But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us all from sin!
For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Jesus Christ our Lord!
But if we are living in the light, as God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from all sin! If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves, and not living in the truth! But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness!
Pride! Greed! Wrath! Envy! Lust! Gluttony, and Sloth!
So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you.
Have nothing to do with sexual immorality!
All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags; we all shrivel up like a leaf, and like the wind our sins sweep us away!
No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear!
“Vengeance is MINE!! I will repay", says the Lord!
There hath no temptation taken you but as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above all!
Final Ending (Repentance) (MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD)
Then, suddenly, the sky above cracked open, and a white beam of light reached down into the Earth, smiting the Mother of Harlots asunder and setting the blood lake to a boil. As the Beast descended down into the lake of fire, Isaac ascended towards the crack in the sky, and as he flew he could see echoes of his past before him...
He saw his mother mourning the loss of her son.
He saw his father leaving them without turning to say goodbye.
He saw his mother sleeping, and his father taking money from her purse.
He heard the late-night fights they had that kept him up at night, and the guilt he felt for what he believed he was causing.
He felt the pain in his stomach during those sleepless nights, and saw his shadow in the closet, waiting for him.
As he rose, he felt his fears drop from his body. His shame, his worry, pulled from his being. As he became lighter, his ascent became faster.
He saw his one true companion, alive and well.
He saw his mother and father together again, holding each other.
He felt his mother kissing him on the head after he had said his prayers, and the comfort of knowing Someone was watching over him.
He saw his own birth, and the faces of his parents filled with joy and optimism.
And then... he saw nothing.
Dad: ...are you sure this is how you want this story to end, Isaac? You're the one writing it, it doesn't have to end this way. Here, how about we tell it a different way? Maybe a happy ending?
Isaac: Okay, Daddy.
Dad: Good. Are you getting sleepy yet?
Isaac: Yeah.
Dad: Okay, so... (ahem) "Isaac and his parents lived in a small house, on the top of a hill..."
He saw his mother mourning the loss of her son.
He saw his father leaving them without turning to say goodbye.
He saw his mother sleeping, and his father taking money from her purse.
He heard the late-night fights they had that kept him up at night, and the guilt he felt for what he believed he was causing.
He felt the pain in his stomach during those sleepless nights, and saw his shadow in the closet, waiting for him.
As he rose, he felt his fears drop from his body. His shame, his worry, pulled from his being. As he became lighter, his ascent became faster.
He saw his one true companion, alive and well.
He saw his mother and father together again, holding each other.
He felt his mother kissing him on the head after he had said his prayers, and the comfort of knowing Someone was watching over him.
He saw his own birth, and the faces of his parents filled with joy and optimism.
And then... he saw nothing.
Dad: ...are you sure this is how you want this story to end, Isaac? You're the one writing it, it doesn't have to end this way. Here, how about we tell it a different way? Maybe a happy ending?
Isaac: Okay, Daddy.
Dad: Good. Are you getting sleepy yet?
Isaac: Yeah.
Dad: Okay, so... (ahem) "Isaac and his parents lived in a small house, on the top of a hill..."
