"Super-teen extrordinaire!
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
Runs around in underwear!
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
Rescues Washington, D.C.
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
Unless something better's on TV!
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
His brain's overloading, it has a chocolate coating!
Textbook case for Sigmund Freud!
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
Check out Dexter Douglas, nerd computer ace
Went surfing on the Internet and was zapped into cyberspace!
He turned into the Freakazoid, who's strong and super-quick!
He drives the villains crazy, 'cause he's a lunatic!
His home base is the Freaka-lair!
Freakzoid, fricassee!
Floyd the barber cuts his hair!
Freakazoid, chimpanzee!
Rides around in the Freakmobile!
Freakazoid, free kazoo!
Hopes to make a movie deal!
Freaka-me, Freaka-you!
He's here to save the nation, so stay tuned to this station
If not, we'll be unemployed!
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
FREAKAZOID!"
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
Runs around in underwear!
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
Rescues Washington, D.C.
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
Unless something better's on TV!
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
His brain's overloading, it has a chocolate coating!
Textbook case for Sigmund Freud!
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
Check out Dexter Douglas, nerd computer ace
Went surfing on the Internet and was zapped into cyberspace!
He turned into the Freakazoid, who's strong and super-quick!
He drives the villains crazy, 'cause he's a lunatic!
His home base is the Freaka-lair!
Freakzoid, fricassee!
Floyd the barber cuts his hair!
Freakazoid, chimpanzee!
Rides around in the Freakmobile!
Freakazoid, free kazoo!
Hopes to make a movie deal!
Freaka-me, Freaka-you!
He's here to save the nation, so stay tuned to this station
If not, we'll be unemployed!
Freakazoid, Freakazoid!
FREAKAZOID!"
— Full theme song
Jeepers: Hehehe… Do you want to see something strange and mystical?
Freakazoid: NO!! Get out of here with that watch! Lay off the poor beavers, will ya?! SHEESH! You're a creep! Go away; we were having a good time until you showed up, Jeepers! ARGH! Go have some coffee with cream, or something! Because I'll tell you something! This is a happy place!
Freakazoid: NO!! Get out of here with that watch! Lay off the poor beavers, will ya?! SHEESH! You're a creep! Go away; we were having a good time until you showed up, Jeepers! ARGH! Go have some coffee with cream, or something! Because I'll tell you something! This is a happy place!
— Freakazoid putting a creep in his place while letting the audience know exactly what kind of show this is going to be.
[in a Jonny Quest parody that predates The Venture Brothers]
Dash O' Pepper: I knew it! It's some guy in a helmet!
Dr. Vernon Danger: Correct, Dash, but more specificly it's my archenemy Dr. Sin! [beat] Unless I miss my guess, Dr. Sin will use my giant semiconductor to attack Las Vegas!
Dash O' Pepper: How do you figure that?
Dr. Vernon Danger: Call it a scientific scholarly guess.
