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Anime and Manga
"Kids, don't use Formula One race cars to chase hedgehogs."
— Sonic, Sonic X
"Any attempt to replicate Yo-Kai behavior would be ill-advised!"
— Whisper, Yo Kai Watch
Film
THERE IS NO RULE OF LAW THAT A KILLING WHICH RESULTS FROM THE USE OF EXCESSIVE FORCE IN SELF-DEFENCE IS ONLY MANSLAUGHTER; IF SUCH A KILLING IS DELIBERATE IT IS MURDER.
— From the Credits of Killers on Wheels, yes it's bolded and in CAPS in the actual film
Literature
"The author of this book would like to point out that the shoplifting technique described here only works with certain outdated security systems. I’ve got no intention of telling you which ones they are because I don’t want angry dads turning up on my doorstep and kicking my head in because their little darling just got busted trying to nick something from a shop."
— Cherub Series, Class A
We all know, of course, that we should never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever fiddle around in any way with electric devices. Never. There are two reasons for this. One is that you can get electrocuted, which is not only deadly but very unpleasant, and the other is that you are not Violet Baudelaire, one of the few people in the world who know how to handle such things. And even Violet was very careful and nervous as she unplugged the lamp and took a long look at the plug itself.
"Now you know how it's done. But I don't recommend that you try it at home. You don't know what to do when something goes wrong.''
— Harry Dresden, Storm Front (Dresden Files)
Live-Action TV
"Warning: The stories portrayed in this show are based on real deaths and are extremely graphic. Names have been changed to protect the identities of the deceased. Do not attempt to try ANY of the actions depicted... YOU WILL DIE!"
"Captain Scarlet is indestructible. You are not. Remember this. Do not try to imitate him."
— A warning that may be found in the opening titles of Captain Scarlet and the Mysterons
"Don't try anything you see us do at home. We're what you call experts."
— MythBusters, almost Once an Episode
"Our Raven warriors are always supervised and have their safety checked by experts. Please do not copy the challenges yourself."
— Raven's titular character, Raven: The Dragon's Eye
"Building a robot is extremely dangerous and should not be attempted without great care."
— Disclaimer at the end of the Nick GAS airings of Robot Wars
"Just because we're dumbasses don't mean you can be one too. So, don't do any of this *beep* that we do at home."
— Opening Narration of Street Outlaws (a show about street racing)
Video Games
"It just occurred to me that mixing medicine and alcohol is a really stupid and possibly lethal thing to do. If I were a real person instead of a lovably inept cartoon character with the potential for a few more sequels... I wouldn't even consider it. Skoal!"
— Guybrush, The Curse of Monkey Island
This is a game born from 9-Volt's feverish imagination and adapted to the unique features of Wii U. Do not attempt any of these activities, such as staying up past your bedtime to play video games, in real life.
— Opening message for Gamer Game & Wario
This is dark fantasy. All characters, while imaginary, signed consent forms before writing began. In real life, actual consent is the cornerstone of any relationship. Talk to your partner about what you want and only do what they agree to do before.
— Opening disclaimer for Harem
"Do not try this at home. Your house isn't nearly tall enough, OK?"
"All events depicted in this game are fictitious. We do not condone reckless driving or rude driving manners. Always adhere to the traffic laws, be mindful of the road users and drive safely. If you want to race, take it to the track."
— Opening screen for Wreckfest
Visual Novels
Content Is Not Consent
Intense content? Mature themes?
It's only fiction until it's not. And when it's not, you could face criminal charges.
Intense content? Mature themes?
It's only fiction until it's not. And when it's not, you could face criminal charges.
— Opening screen for Something's Wrong with Sunny Day Jack
Webcomics
"Vehicles often have additional capabilities that don't normally come into the awareness of roleplayers. But knowledge of these features can help save your skin in difficult adventure situations. For example, if your car breaks down in the desert, (the following is roleplaying game advice only, do not try this in real life) you can drink the water from the radiator.
"If you're a GM you need to be on top of these sorts of things, to make sure you apply them realistically. For example, radiator water will probably have antifreeze or some other toxic chemical additives in it that may not be apparent to anyone trying to drink it. (And if you drink it in real life it will kill you, so don't.)"
"If you're a GM you need to be on top of these sorts of things, to make sure you apply them realistically. For example, radiator water will probably have antifreeze or some other toxic chemical additives in it that may not be apparent to anyone trying to drink it. (And if you drink it in real life it will kill you, so don't.)"
"Disclaimer: Please DO NOT test this theory by throwing your cat out a window, an airplane, or whatever. Even if it were to survive the fall, it may not survive landing on something pointy or having its little heart explode. I will NOT have dead kitties on my conscience."
— Kevin Bolk, I'm My Own Mascot
.
. Web Original
"Before we go any further, I want to emphasize something:
"I am not an authority on lightning safety. I am a guy who draws pictures on the internet. I like when things catch fire and explode, which means I do not have your best interests in mind."
"I am not an authority on lightning safety. I am a guy who draws pictures on the internet. I like when things catch fire and explode, which means I do not have your best interests in mind."
"disclaimer: i am a cartoonist. if you follow my advice on safety around nuclear materials you probably deserve whatever happens to you."
Web Video
"Motorsports are dangerous. Be safe and never hoon on public streets or in any way that may endanger the lives of others. Seriously folks, don't be an idiot. Hoon responsibly."
— Warning displayed at the beginning and end of Ken Block's GYMKHANA TEN: The Ultimate Tire Slaying Tour, some variation of which also graced his later Gymkhana videos
, some variation of which also graced his later Gymkhana videos"Remember, kids, when you touch burning orbs of fire, you get mystical powers! No, really, don't do that, really don't."
"...if you were to, like, blenderize a live sea sponge and then leave the sponge smoothie to settle overnight, you'd wake up the next morning to find the surviving cells had found each other and were reforming themselves into a sea sponge again. Try doing that with any other animal! ...Actually NO, DO NOT TRY DOING THAT WITH ANY OTHER ANIMAL--"
Jory: We may make this look easy, but trust us, it is.
Jonny: You still shouldn't try it at home, though.
Jonny: You still shouldn't try it at home, though.
Jonny: Please don't try this at home.
Riley: You could get seriously injured, or even worse...
Jory: ...you'll be dead!
Riley: You could get seriously injured, or even worse...
Jory: ...you'll be dead!
— Another warning from Is It a Good Idea to Microwave This?
DISCLAIMER: This balling out of control was done by a stunt rapper in a closed course. Do NOT attempt to ball on his level. You WILL end up sleeping in a box by the end of the month. In fact, don't let these lyrics fool you: you have NO idea about the actual financial stability of these rappers. These fools could be broker than you. I'm sayin', if you make $100,000 but spend $100,000 on diamonds and strip clubs to show off how rich you are, you aren't really that rich anymore, are you? Put it like this, have you ever seen a rapper in court for child support? Yeah, all of a sudden, their bank account starts sounding REAL unremarkable. And personally, I'm more likely to believe a person's words when legal proceedings are involved than when they're in a rap song, ya feel me? Just sayin', "Don't let these rap songs get you fucked up."
"WARNING
This video features stunts and riding performed by a professional rider on a closed course. Do not attempt to recreate or reenact any of the activities performed.
Please ride responsibly and keep it on two wheels."
This video features stunts and riding performed by a professional rider on a closed course. Do not attempt to recreate or reenact any of the activities performed.
Please ride responsibly and keep it on two wheels."
— Closing remarks for "ROBBIE MADISON'S AIR.CRAFT", a stunt-BMX video
", a stunt-BMX video"As you can clearly see, I have no regards for safety. Don't be like that."
Hey, now, don’t try this at home
Do do do do do
Hey, now, don’t try it
Don’t you dare try it
You might die if you do this at home
Oh, here’s the bridge, woah
Don’t try it
Don’t do the thing that we’re about to do
Ooh, don’t try this
At all, or you’ll die, if
You try this thing at home
Oh, it’s a key change
Oh, it’s a key change
Oh, it’s the Disclaimer Song
Don’t try this at home
If you do, you might die
This is disclaimer to you:
Hey, don’t be that guy
Just watch us do the thing you want to do
Be safe for me, but be safe for you
Do do do do do
Hey, now, don’t try it
Don’t you dare try it
You might die if you do this at home
Oh, here’s the bridge, woah
Don’t try it
Don’t do the thing that we’re about to do
Ooh, don’t try this
At all, or you’ll die, if
You try this thing at home
Oh, it’s a key change
Oh, it’s a key change
Oh, it’s the Disclaimer Song
Don’t try this at home
If you do, you might die
This is disclaimer to you:
Hey, don’t be that guy
Just watch us do the thing you want to do
Be safe for me, but be safe for you
— The Disclaimer Song, Unus Annus
Western Animation
"Beavis and Butt-Head are not role models. They're not even human; they're cartoons. Some of the things they do would cause a person to get hurt, expelled, arrested, possibly deported. To put it another way: don't try this at home."
— The second opening of Beavis And Butthead
"George is a monkey, so he can do things that you can't."
— Some kid at the end of every episode of Curious George
Kevin: Don't try this at home, kids!
Rolf: This would be impossible, as Rolf would hit the ceiling!
Rolf: This would be impossible, as Rolf would hit the ceiling!
— Ed, Edd n Eddy, "See No Ed"
"Kids, don't try this at home. We're professionals, and also cartoon characters."
— Garfield, Garfield and Friends
Miscellaneous
"Do not attempt this at home. Doing so could lead you but is not limited to death, breakage, screaming parents, dismemberment, leakage, foul discharge, mutilation, humiliation, dehydration, itchy feet, hypertension, a splinter - and you know how painful those can be! Really, if you have half a brain, think about this one!"
— Disclaimer, Funny Face
