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"Those who will not live by the law... SHALL DIE BY THE LAW!"
"The Lord, the Lord Jehovah has given unto you these Fifteen— [drops one of the stone tablets] —Oy. ... Ten! Ten Commandments for all to obey!"

The Commandments are a short list of simple rules that must be followed. It's a much simpler system than any rulebook, lawbook or manifesto. The most famous such list of commandments (at least in western culture) is the one known as The Ten Commandments, featured in Real Life Christianity as well as stories about the faith.note  However, many other such lists pop up in various media, especially fantasy.

If a work has its own list, include the list on the example. (Unless the list is really long, but if it is then it's unlikely that the example truly belongs in this trope in the first place.)

No examples from Real Life religion or philosophy please. Not on the main page.

When rules are played for annoyance, that's Rule #1. When rules are played for alienation, that's Ape Shall Never Kill Ape. When a long series of Noodle Incidents result in somebody having a long list of commandments just for them, it is Things You Are Not Allowed to Do. Commandments specifically for robots fall under Laws of Robotics.

Contrast Single-Precept Religion.


Examples:

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    Anime & Manga 
  • No Game No Life: All sixteen Exceeds (the sentient races of Disboard) are bound by ten inviolable Pledges set up by Tet, the God of Games, upon his/her ascent to being the One True God following the brutal war that destroyed most of the Old Dei (themselves one of the Exceeds, by virtue of Tet surviving). It was actually created by Riku Dora and his wife Schwi 6,000 years ago, with Tet as their own Old Deus created to help fulfill their wish of creating a peaceful world for the war-weary Exceeds.
    1. All bloodshed, war and pillaging is forbidden. (This includes any kind of violence or violation of rights, like physical injuries, rape or a slap.)
    2. All conflicts will be resolved through games.
    3. Each party involved in a game must bet something that both sides agree is of equal value. (The wagers can also be non-material, so long as both side agree to it being equivalent.)
    4. As long as it doesn't go against Pledge 3, the things that are wagered and the rules of the game will not be questioned.
    5. The challenged party has the right to decide the rules of the game. (This also includes the right to refrain from the game.)
    6. Any bets made in accordance with the Oaths must be upheld. (The laws of the universe will actively see to it.)
    7. Conflicts between groups will be conducted by designated representatives with absolute authority. (But that doesn't mean that two people can't compete as one, as Sora and Shiro shows.)
    8. Being caught cheating during a game is grounds for an instant loss. (Which Sora interprets as a deliberate loophole meant for smarter players to exploit.)
    9. In the name of God, the previous rules may never be changed.
    10. Everyone must have fun playing together!
  • Bubblegum Crisis: Downplayed. As revealed in supplemental material, and occasionally referenced in the series, the Knight Sabers have 11 rules:
    1. Do not divulge any information concerning this organisation.
    2. Do not act upon a personal grudge.
    3. Do not act without the mutual consent of all members.
    4. Do not secede from this organisation.
    5. Members are personally responsible for any damage done to the organisation's equipment unless that damage was unavoidable.
    6. Do not divulge any information concerning our clients.
    7. Do not gather information on your own. The task of intelligence gathering is to be distributed evenly among all the members.
    8. Keep in contact with the other members regularly.
    9. The members do not know each other outside of this organization.
    10. Do not get involved with a man.
    11. The penalty for violating any of the ten regulations listed above is death.
    • It is worth noting that over the course of the series, almost all of the rules get broken, and rule 11 is never enforced. Ultimately, they seem to be ideals which have been rapidly modified in the face of reality.
    • Rule 1 is a tricky case - while several people know the identities of some or all of the members, nobody actually reveals anything.
    • Similarly, Priss has almost broken rule 2 several times, but the others always end up suppourting her grudges.
    • However, Priss has broken rules 3 and 4, and how her personal duel with Largo and his Hyperboomers (which resulted in the destruction of her hardsuit and motorslave) relates to rule 5 is also a scary thought.
    • Linna, on the other hand, breaks rule 10 regularly.
    • Everyone except Sylia has broken rule 8.
    • Rule 9 is flagrantly disregarded by all four members.
    • Rules 6 and 7 seem to have been followed, though (regarding 7, in OVA 1, Priss is doing what she's told... until she's chased by Boomers, then she's surviving).
  • KonoSuba: The Axis cult, the religion that worships Aqua, chants their divine commandments during the finale of season 2. Even though they don't realize that Aqua really is their goddess in the flesh, it still powers her up enough to defeat the enemy. Of course, this being Aqua, her commandments are... odd.
    "The Axis Church can get things done. And because you can get things done, even if it doesn't go well, it's not your fault!"
    "It's society's fault that things don't work out!"
    "You can run away from unpleasant things! That doesn't mean you've lost! Because, as they say, 'Sometimes running away is winning'!"
    "The answer you come to after being in doubt is usually something you'll regret, no matter what you choose! If you're going to regret it anyway, do whatever is easiest for you in the moment!"
    "Do not fear growing old! Not even God knows whether you will be happy in the future, so you should, at least, be happy now!"
    "Eris pads her chest!"
  • Death Parade: The arbiters have a set of three rules that dictate their existence, with an additional one being added at the end:
    1. Arbiters cannot quit making judgments, for that is the sole reason they exist.
    2. Arbiters cannot experience death, for that would bring them too close to being human.
    3. Arbiters cannot feel emotion, for they are merely dummies.
    4. Arbiters may not work hand in hand with life, for that will ruin them.

    Comic Books 
  • Ultimate X Men: Magneto tattooed the "Ten Mutant Commandments" on his back.

    Fan Works 
  • Absolute Trust: In the months prior to Aang's awakening, Alec comes up with six rules to govern how he uses his future knowledge, which are listed at the top of every chapter after 3:
    Rule Number One: Alec won't warn the Gaang about things in advance or solve their problems for them, with a few rare exceptions.
    Rule Number Two: Only Alec has the right to tell people his true origins, and he will mostly limit this to group members. He will tell new group members his secret as soon as they join the Gaang.
    Rule Number Three: There are some changes Alec wants to make, and he will use his knowledge of the future to make those changes.
    Rule Number Four: Sometimes, to make a change, Alec will act in a way that doesn't make sense. If that's necessary, he'll tell the Gaang "I need you to absolutely trust me." After he says that, the Gaang has to either do whatever he asks or leave him to do what he needs to do.
    Rule Number Five: After a change happens, Alec will tell the Gaang what happened in the original story, in the interest of transparency.
    Rule Number Six: If a major change happens that Alec doesn't expect, the Gaang will have a meeting ASAP. In this meeting, Alec will break Rule One and tell them all relevant information that will help them figure out how to respond to the change.
  • The whole point of The Official List of Unofficial Rules. It's played for laughs.
  • The War of the Masters uses the original Ten Commandments as a starting point for a more comprehensive version of Isaac Asimov's Three Laws of Robotics. They range from the serious—"thou shalt not commit murder" is interpreted as "do not kill without orders from your biological superiors"—to the not-so-serious—"remember the Sabbath and keep it holy" equates to "don't bother your superiors while they're sleeping except in a genuine emergency".
  • Ma'at: From Chapter 2, "the prototypes of the forty-two principles of Ma'at" are seen and listed, then the archeologist from the future has thoughts about it:
    The academician's mind pulled a later version of the list from the collection of facts stored from her long studies, and wondered how much the ancient proscriptions had propagated across the historical landscape. ~Golden truths in a plain wrapping. I wonder if these are some of the roots of the Hebrew's Ten Commandments?~
  • Queens of Mewni: Etheria the Knight created a Code of Conduct for the heirs of the Butterfly Kingdom to follow, and while there were varying degrees of success for following said code, only Etheria herself obeyed all ten rules. (Particularly, Rule 6, which forbade premarital sex, was broken a lot by subsequent heirs.)
    ''Aurora, for now, is doing well."

    Films — Live-Action 

    Literature 
  • Animal Farm has the principles of Animalism, which are written on the side of the barn for all to see. The first principle was "All animals are equal". As their system slipped into totalitarianism and tyranny under Napoleon and his team of pigs, the principles got altered and removed until only a subversion of the first rule remained: "All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others." The other six laws, in order of appearance:
    • Whatever goes upon two legs is an enemy.
    • Whatever goes upon four legs, or has wings, is a friend.
    • No animal shall wear clothes.
    • No animal shall sleep in a bed.
      • After the pigs move into the old house and begin sleeping in the beds, it is amended with "with sheets".
    • No animal shall drink alcohol.
      • After the pigs become drunk on alcohol, it is amended with "in excess".
    • No animal shall kill another animal.
    • All animals are equal.
      • But some animals are more equal than others.
  • Christian Nation has the Fifty Blessings, which President Steve Jordan had put into law that supersedes the American Constitution — many of which are vague and unenforceable.
  • The badgers in The Cold Moons have ancient laws known as "the Adamus". What these laws are is never properly discussed, but it's likely similar to the Ten Commandments.
  • The Code of Dinotopia has ten commandments, plus one that was lost to time and natural erosion.
    1. Survival of all or none
    2. One raindrop raises the sea
    3. Weapons are enemies, even to their owners
    4. Give more, take less
    5. Others first, self last
    6. Observe, listen, and learn
    7. Do one thing at a time
    8. Sing every day
    9. Exercise imagination
    10. Eat to live, don't live to eat
    11. In the original book, an old sage suggests the damaged last commandment is "Don't pee in the bath." In the mini-series, this was changed to "Follow the Light."
    • A twelfth commandment can be found in the first letters of the listed eleven, "Sow good seed."
  • Discworld
    • The three rules of the Librarians of Time and Space are:
      1. Silence.
      2. Books must be returned no later than the last date shown.
      3. Do not interfere with the nature of causality.
    • The disc's gods all have their own. It's mentioned that the gods who endure longest tend to be the ones with the easiest commandments to follow - Offler the Crocodile God, oldest god on the Disc, only has a tiny handful of them and they're mostly about not eating broccoli. Sweevo, god of cut timber, banned the practice of "panupunitoplasty" (a word he made up) just to mess with people. Meanwhile Nuggan, principal deity of Borogravia and also the god of Things In Correct Places On Desks, started with a simple list of commandments, but constantly adds to his list of Abominations so that his holy book is a three-ring binder. They got so extreme and nonsensical (crop rotation, shirts with six buttons, cheese, babies, the colour blue, jigsaw puzzles, etc.) that Borogravians began praying to their Duchess for succor, elevating her to quasi-deity status and effectively killing Nuggan, so that his last Abominations are likened to the echoes of a lunatic.
  • The Dresden Files has Seven Laws of Magic. Violators will be killed.
    • Thou shalt not kill by use of magic. note 
    • Thou shalt not transform others. note 
    • Thou shalt not invade the mind of another. note 
    • Thou shalt not enthrall another. note 
    • Thou shalt not reach beyond the borders of life. note 
    • Thou shalt not swim against the Currents of Time. note 
    • Thou shalt not seek beyond the Outer Gates. note 
  • The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster: Eight of those. Well, 10 actually, but Mosey the pirate captain dropped two of the stone tablets as he walked down Mount Salsa.
  • The Island of Doctor Moreau:
    • Not to go on all-fours; that is the Law. Are we not Men?
    • Not to suck up Drink; that is the Law. Are we not Men?
    • Not to eat Fish or Flesh; that is the Law. Are we not Men?
    • Not to claw the Bark of Trees; that is the Law. Are we not Men?
    • Not to chase other Men; that is the Law. Are we not Men?
  • Isaac Asimov's Robot Series: Created through the help of John W. Campbell, Dr Asimov wrote the Three Laws of Robotics, which became imitated by many other SF writers in works about Artificial Intelligence. Note that unlike other sets of commandments, these laws are hard-coded into the robots' artificial brains. Robots are designed with utilitarian values, deontology being incorporated at the second law level. This means that if a robot is near a runaway trolley which will run into and kill five people, but it can stop it by shoving a large person in the way, then it will kill one human to save five humans (but would much rather sacrifice itself to save those five people). Many simpler models will then break down because they were put into a position where they broke the first law. The most highly-advanced AI in Dr. Asimov's stories actually deduced a Zeroth law due to the details of the first law: A robot may not injure humanity, or, through inaction, allow humanity to come to harm. Still, robots capable of understanding this level of abstraction are rare, and even thinking about a method of circumventing the first law is liable to cause them to break down.
    1. A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
    2. A robot must obey orders given to it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
    3. A robot must protect its own existence, as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Laws.
  • The Stormlight Archive: The Ideals of the Knights Radiant. The First Ideal was common to all orders, but the others varied.
  • Michael Moorcock's book The Warhound And The Worlds Pain had the main character go through a valley in which the only law was steal nothing. Not as easy as it sounds, as it's then explained that pretty much any crime can be defined in terms of stealing: murder is the theft of life, lying is the theft of choice, etc.

    Live-Action TV 
  • Leroy Jethro Gibbs on NCIS has at least fifty-one rules for himself and his team as of the last episode of season 7. Gibbs' rules (as of Season 8 Episode 24). Yes there are a few doubles. Word of God explains the doubles of Rules 1, 2, and 3 are Golden Rules imparted on Gibbs by Franks. It was never said which belongs in Franks' set.
    The Unwritten rule: Do what you have to for family.
    1: Never screw (over) your partner.
    1: Never let suspects stay together.
    2: Always wear gloves at a crime scene.
    3: Don't believe what you're told. Double check.
    3: Never be unreachable.
    4: If you have a secret, the best thing is to keep it to yourself. The second-best is to tell one other person if you must. There is no third-best.
    5: You don't waste good.
    6: Never apologize, it's a sign of weakness.
    7: Always be specific when you lie.
    8: Never take anything for granted.
    9: Never go anywhere without a knife.
    10: Never get personally involved in a case.
    11: When the job is done, walk away.
    12: Never date a co-worker.
    13: Never, ever involve lawyers.
    15: Always work as a team.
    18: It's better to seek forgiveness than ask permission.
    22: Never, ever bother Gibbs in interrogation.
    23: Never mess with a Marine's coffee, if you want to live.
    27: Two ways to follow: First way they never notice you. Second way they only notice you.
    35: Always watch the watchers.
    38: Your case. Your lead.
    39: There is no such thing as a coincidence.
    40: If it seems like someone is out to get you, they are.
    44: First things first, hide the women and children.
    45: Clean up your own messes.
    51: Sometimes you're wrong (addendum to original rules, and written on the back of Rule 13).
  • Monty Python's Flying Circus gives us the rules of the Department of Philosophy at the University of Walamaloo:
    • Rule One: No poofters.
    • Rule Two: No member of the faculty is to maltreat the Abos in any way at all if there's anybody watching.
    • Rule Three: No poofters.
    • Rule Four: This term, I don't want to catch anybody not drinking in their room after lights out.
    • Rule Five: No poofters.
    • Rule Six: There is no Rule Six.
    • Rule Seven: No poofters.
  • The Star Trek: The Next Generation episode "The Game" introduces us to Lefler's Laws, a list of reminders that Lt. Lefler wrote for herself anytime she learned anything important. She's written 102 of them, and a few of them come out during the episode as appropriate:
    • Law 1: You can only count on yourself.
    • Law 17: When all else fails, do it yourself.
    • Law 36: You gotta go with what works.
    • Law 91: Always watch your back.
    • At the end of the episode, Westley, who has developed a small romance with her, is preparing to return to the Academy, and offers this: "Law 103: A couple of light years can't keep good friends apart."
  • On Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, the Ferengi characters (especially Quark) would occasionally quote from "The Rules of Acquisition", found here. There are at least 285 official rules, apparently, and more unofficial rules. The first and most important Rule of Acquisition: Once you have their money, never give it back.

    Music 
  • "Ten Crack Commandments" by The Notorious B.I.G.. In short:
    1. Don't say how much money you have on you.
    2. Keep your intentions to yourself.
    3. Don't trust anyone wholeheartedly.
    4. Never get high on your own supply.
    5. Don't sell crack where you live.
    6. Don't extend credit.
    7. Keep your business and your family separated.
    8. Don't keep a firearm on yourself.
    9. Stay away from the cops if you're not getting arrested.
    10. Don't take crack from someone else on consignment (selling on their behalf) if you're not already established.
  • “New Rules” by Dua Lipa.
    1. Don’t pick up the phone. (You know he’s only calling cuz he’s drunk and alone.)
    2. Don’t let him in. (You’ll have to kick him out again.)
    3. Don’t be his friend. (You know you’ll only wake up in his bed in the morning. And if you’re under him, you ain’t getting over him.)
  • The Moonglows' "The Ten Commandments of Love":
    1. Thou shalt never love another
    2. And stand by me all the while
    3. Take happiness with the heartaches
    4. And go through life wearing a smile
    5. Thou shalt always have faith in me, in everything I do or say
    6. Love me with all your heart and soul, until our life on earth is through
    7. Come to me when I am lonely
    8. Kiss me when you hold me tight
    9. Treat me sweet and gentle
    10. When we say goodnight

    Pinballs 
  • Data East's RoboCop has the three Prime Directives from the movie, which must be completed to enable multiball.

    Radio 
  • The Brewing Network at times refers to what they call "the brewer's code", which is "don't be a dick". Usually cited when a competition relies on the honor code (ie not checking the internet for answers) or talking about behavior and beer festivals and conferences.

    Tabletop Games 
  • Geist: The Sin-Eaters has the Old Laws of the Dominions of the Underworld. Each Dominion has its own set of laws, such as "Take nothing, leave nothing," "Speak not to the shades" or "Bow before passing guardsmen." It's suggesting that Storytellers tempt the players into breaking them... but in-game, most Sin-Eaters are very reluctant to break them, as doing so draws the instant attention of the Kerberos that runs the Dominion.
  • The original Vampire: The Masquerade had Traditions that vampires (Camarilla vampires, anyway) were required to follow.
    • The First Tradition: The Masquerade
      Thou shalt not reveal thy true nature to those not of the Blood. Doing so shall renounce thy claims of Blood.
    • The Second Tradition: The Domain
      Thy Domain is thy concern. All others owe thee respect while in it. None may challenge thy word in thy Domain.
    • The Third Tradition: The Progeny
      Thou shalt sire another only with permission of thine Elder. If thou createst another without thine Elder's leave, both thou and thy progeny shalt be slain.
    • The Fourth Tradition: The Accounting
      Those thou create are thine own children. Until thy progeny shall be released, thou shalt command them in all things. Their sins are thine to endure.
    • The Fifth Tradition: Hospitality
      Honor one another's Domain. When thou comest to a foreign city, thou shalt present thyself to the one who ruleth there. Without the word of acceptance, thou art Nothing.
    • The Sixth Tradition: Destruction
      Thou art forbidden to destroy another of thy kind. The right of Destruction belongeth only to thine Elder. Only the Eldest among thee shall call the Blood Hunt.
  • In the successor game Vampire: The Requiem, these Traditions are simplified down to three: Masquerade (pretty much the same as above), Progeny (same as above), and Amaranth ("Do not commit diablerie").
  • Ars Magica. The Order of Hermes has a Code of Conduct which (among other things) forbids dealing with demons, endangering the Order, interfering with secular governments and spying on or killing other mages. It's the cornerstone of the Order's legal system and all members swear an oath to obey it, nominally on pain of death.
  • Paladins in the Forgotten Realms follow many deities, each with a different portfolio, their orders and churches may emphasize different parts of the same god's agenda... you got the picture: an universal and strict code cannot exist. But the common guidelines (priorities and interpretations differ) are Paladin's Virtues from "Quentin's Monograph":
    An organized approach brings the most good for all.
    Laws exist to bring prosperity to those under them.
    Unjust laws must be overturned or changed in a reasonable and positive fashion.
    People rule; laws help.
    Cause the most good through the least harm.
    Protect the weak.
    Goodness is not a natural state, but must be fought for to be attained and maintained.
    Lead by example.
    Let your deeds speak your intentions.
    Goodness radiates from the heart.
    Give others your mercy, but keep your wits about you.
  • Old World of Darkness:
    • Werewolf: The Apocalypse presents the Litany of the Garou Nationnote .
      Garou shall not mate with Garou.
      Combat the Wyrm wherever it dwells and wherever it breeds.
      Respect the territory of another.
      Accept an honorable surrender.
      Submit to those higher in station.
      The first share of the kill for the greatest in station.
      Ye shall not eat the flesh of humans.
      Respect those beneath ye — all are of Gaia.
      The Veil shall not be lifted.
      Do not suffer thy people to tend thy sickness.
      The leader may be challenged at any time during peace.
      The leader may not be challenged during wartime.
      Ye shall take no action that causes a Caern to be violated.
    • Werewolf: The Forsaken likewise has the Oath of the Moon, with precepts such as. "The Wolf Must Hunt," "The Herd Must Not Know", "The Low Honor the High; the High Honor the Low," "The People Do Not Murder the People," "Respect Your Prey," "The Uratha Shall Cleave to the Human," and "Do Not Eat the Flesh of Man or Wolf." Each tribe has a little sub-clause to this Oath, such as "Offer No Surrender You Would Not Accept" (the Blood Talons), "Pay Each Spirit in Kind" (the Bone Shadows), "Let No Sacred Place in Your Territory Be Violated" (the Hunters in Darkness), "Honor Your Territory in All Things" (the Iron Masters), and "Allow No One to Witness or Tend To Your Weakness" (the Storm Lords).
  • Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay: Most religious organizations in the Old World follow a set of tenets from their Patron God. They're an especially serious matter for priests, who can lose access to their holy magic if they violate their god's will.

    Theater 

    Video Games 
  • The Elder Scrolls:
  • The Phantom Thieves in Persona 5 set down only two rules to regulate themselves regarding their business of stealing people's hearts: Any potential target must be agreed on unanimously, and the Phantom Thieves must never kill their target, intentionally or otherwise.
  • In Quest for Glory III, the city-state of Tarna was ruled by this simple code of law:
    Thou shalt harm none
    Thou shalt not use magic upon the streets of Tarna
    Thou shalt not take that which is not thine.
    Thou shalt behave with honor.
  • In World of Warcraft Shadowlands, there is a Broker named Ve'nari who, while trapped in the Maw, has evaded capture and torment from its inhabitants and the Jailer himself for untold eons. Ve'nari lives by a strict set of rules to ensure her relative freedom and instructs the Player Character to follow them if they want her aid in subverting the Jailer's ambitions.
    Rule 1: Always have an escape plan. (She admits to the irony of this rule since she's still trapped in the Maw itself, if not a prisoner.)
    Rule 2: Keep a low profile. Don't draw the Jailer's attention to yourself.
    Rule 3: Trust is earned. If you want her trust and support, you have to work for it.
    Rule 4: Always keep a list of potential threats to your safety. Prioritize who or what is the larger threat, and plan to eliminate it.
    Rule 5: Be audacious, when the situation demands it.
    Rule 6: Implement new concealment measures regularly.
    Rule 7: Betrayal is inevitable, even from those close to you. Especially from those close to you.

    Visual Novels 
  • Umineko: When They Cry uses a variation of Knox's Decalogue:
    1. It is forbidden for the culprit to be anyone not mentioned in the early part of the story.
    2. It is forbidden for supernatural agencies to be employed as a detective technique.
    3. It is forbidden for hidden passages to exist.
    4. It is forbidden for unknown drugs or hard-to-understand scientific devices to be used.
    5. (Not Included) ("No Asian characters must appear"... the story takes place in Japan...)
    6. It is forbidden for accident or intuition to be employed as a detective technique.
    7. It is forbidden for the detective to be the culprit.
    8. It is forbidden for the case to be resolved with clues that are not presented.
    9. It is permitted for observers to let their own conclusions and interpretations be heard.
    10. It is forbidden for a character to disguise themselves as another without any clues.
    • Van Dine's 20 rules were featured shortly in EP7, but only a few of them were used, as the gameboard probably doesn't follow those commandments.

    Web Comics 

    Web Original 

    Western Animation 
  • The Fairly OddParents! has the Da Rules, which are the rules fairies godparents and the children they are assigned to must follow. Da Rules are not always enforced consistently and often run on New Rules as the Plot Demands. In a few episodes Timmy manages to mess up so badly that a new rules is added to keep anybody from doing it again. Some of the more commonly cited rules include:
    • A godchild must keep the existence of their fairies a secret.
    • Fairy godparents can only be assigned to miserable children and must move to another child when they become an adult, stop being miserable, or breaks the previous rule.
    • Fairy magic cannot be directly used to win a nonmagical competition.
    • Fairy magic cannot be used to intentionally kill or cause harm to a human.
    • Fairy magic cannot create or interfere with true love.
    • A godchild cannot wish away another child's fairies.
  • In the Futurama episode "Godfellas," a spaceborne Bender becomes host to a tiny civilization that worships him as a god. Leading to...
    Malachi: Behold! The One Commandment!
    GOD NEEDS BOOZE
    Bender: Make it a double!

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