Funny / You Only Live Twice

The Film

• The commentary on Bond's evident death by sex in the film's introduction. It also counts as a Tear Jerker.
  Well, at least he died on the job... he would have wanted it that way.
• Globetrotting sex machine Bond complaining about the imminent sex encounter.
  The things I do for England...
• "It can save your life, this cigarette." It does.
  • Following the above line, Bond quips that Tanaka sounds like a commercial.
• This exchange between Bond and Tanaka, after Tanaka introduces himself.
  Bond: But if you are Tanaka, then how do you feel about me?
  Tanaka: I...Love you.
  Bond: Well, I'm glad we got that out of the way.
  • Earlier, when Moneypenny give Bond the password, she coyly tries to get him to repeat it back to her. You know, to make sure he's got it...
• Bond and Helga after the Kobe Docks fight
  Helga: "I got you."
  Bond: "Well, enjoy yourself."
  • She slaps his face.
• "Siamese vodka?!"
• Bond defending his Carpet of Virility against "Tiger" Tanaka's observation:
  "Tiger" Tanaka: "I suppose you know what it is about you that fascinates them. It's the hair on your chest. Japanese men all have beautiful bare skin."
  Bond: "Japanese proverb say: 'Bird never make nest in bare tree'."
• Bond's report after Little Nellie's encounter with SPECTRE gunships.
  Bond: "Little Nellie got a hot reception. Four bigshots made improper advances towards her, but she defended her honor with great success."
• This line, combined with the visuals:
  Helga: "Mr. Osato believes in a healthy chest."
  Bond: "Really?"
• When the bad guys' car is captured by the helicopter, the driver frantically keeps trying to steer even though the car's in midair.
  Tanaka: How's that for Japanese efficiency?
  Bond: Just a drop in the ocean.
• How can we forget the poor Blofeld's cat who was dead scared when Blofeld's base began to explode?

The Novel

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