Funny / The Muppets (2015)

As a Moments subpage, all spoilers are unmarked as per policy. You Have Been Warned.

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Test pilot/promos

• From the YouTube version of the pilot:
  Narrator: Here it is. You got what you wanted. Please stop yelling at us.
• The pilot itself has some rather hilarious moments, such as Miss Piggy not recognizing Gonzo and calling him "Gary" instead. Later, Kermit finds out that she's dating Topher Grace.
  Kermit: Wait, so you two are... I mean you're...
  Miss Piggy: What, me and Topher? OH yeah! TMZ's calling us "Tophiggy"! Well, good luck with the show, kids! Ciao! (she leaves)
  Kermit: We're screwed, Gary.
• On the one hand: the show is going to happen. Other hand: Piggy is back and she and Kermit are a bit tense.
  Kermit: Yeah, I've made my life a bacon-wrapped hell on Earth.
  Gonzo: Yep! Congratulations.
  • The actual pilot's version is pretty funny too:
  Kermit: Yeah, I've made my life a bacon-wrapped hell on Earth.
  Sam the Eagle: Can't say "hell".
• Nobody remembers who Chip is, even Chip himself!
  Chip: Guys, was I in Muppet Treasure Island?
• During a promo, Kermit is going over a scene with a new star. Then he turns and notices Nathan Fillion coming out of Miss Piggy's trailer with messy hair and a ruffled shirt. Kermit doesn't say a word, but you can tell he's very angry about that.
• During a promo, Miss Piggy is doing a talk, but suddenly asks to cut. It turns out she's distracted by Nathan Fillion's ass. Said celebrity accepts this explanation, as if it happens all the time.
• The promo with Clark Gregg of Agents of S-period-H-period-I-period-E-period-L-period-D-period, which is Pepe trying to get Clark to come clean about everything happening in the next season, leading to Clark calling in "Agent Animal".
  "HE CAN'T TALK ABOUT IT!"

Pig Girls Don't Cry

• The entire scene with Elizabeth Banks and Scooter in the tour cart.
• Fozzie and his girlfriend's parents, made better by her father being played by Jere Burns fresh off his role as Wynn Duffy.
  Carl: If you have kids, where would they go to the bathroom, in the woods?
  Fozzie: Okay, that is an offensive stereotype!
• The dig at Miss Piggy's weight in this exchange.
  Kermit: Uh, moving on... Bobo?
  Bobo: Yes sir?
  Kermit: Listen, next time we do a sketch where Piggy flies across the stage, I think we should choose a wire that actually supports her weight.
  Bobo: Huh? Should've worked. It was a cable from a wrecking ball.
• Janice on Piggy's guest band:
  Janice: You know, their original name was Imagine Dragons.
  Floyd: But that is their name.
  Janice: Yeah, they kept it.
  • This review notes that the bit could have come from the pen of Jerry Juhl (a writer for The Muppet Show responsible for many of its funny moments).
• Fozzie introducing Up Late with Miss Piggy while reading from cue cards held by Sweetums, who seems to be holding them out of order:
  Featuring the Electric Mayhem! Dr. Teeth and The! ...Electric Mayhem.
• Fozzie's comment about his online dating profile.
  Fozzie: When your online profile says "Passionate bear looking for love," you get a lot of wrong responses. (beat) Not "wrong", it... just wrong for me.
• Dancing With The Tsars and Kermit's reaction to it.
  Gonzo: So any notes?
  Kermit: I hate everything about it.
  Gonzo: (happily) Only one note! (Rizzo and Pepe nod while Kermit sighs)
• "You don't have to make a joke every time you come into the writer's room... Lord knows these guys don't."
• Uncle Deadly getting a lint roller stuck to Kermit.

Hostile Makeover

• Kermit sets up Miss Piggy with Josh Groban and her behavior starts to drag down the show's quality. How does Kermit get things back to normal and get her to break up with him? By placing "Josh Groban presents" above her show's title on the giant poster of it in the backlot. Her reaction seals the deal.
  • Kermit's "Bye bye" to Groban is just as great.
• Laurence Fishburne's cameo in this scene.
  Kermit: Hey, hey, when are you gonna come to the show?
  Laurence: Well, if it keeps on sucking the way it did last night, NEVER! *drives off*
  • And later on in that scene:
    Laurence: Hey Kermit?
    Kermit: Yeah?
    Laurence: I just wanted to say I'm sorry about what I said about your show sucking.
    Kermit: Yeah.
    Laurence: I just had a really rough night.
    Kermit: Oh, I'm sorry, what happened?
    Laurence: I watched your show, and it sucked! *drives off again, laughing this time*
• Reza Aslan's You Have GOT to Be Kidding Me! face when Piggy asks why he didn't get more creative with history. Plus Kermit's Face Palm the entire time.
• Big Mean Carl the receptionist.
  Big Mean Carl: He wants to see you! At his house!
  Fozzie: Was he angry or is that just you?
  Big Mean Carl: I take messages! I don't judge tone!
• The first scene has Scooter interrupt a meeting to tell them Piggy is in a bad mood. Kermit thinks he's overreacting. Uncle Deadly says it's a code red. Cue Mass "Oh, Crap!".
  • Later Kermit explains via Confession Cam what each color means.
  Kermit: We've created a color code alert system to track Piggy's moods. Green, she's calm, but we've never been at green. Yellow, she's in tears. Orange, I'm in tears. And with a code red, if she locks eyes with you, it's already too late!
  • During Piggy's rampage, Kermit, Scooter, and Uncle Deadly hide under a desk and Kermit asks Deadly if Piggy saw the tags on her wardrobe and found out what size she is.
  Uncle Deadly: No please, I've woven such a cocoon of lies that she doesn't know her size, weight, or even how old she is.
  • That being said, the things Piggy shouts during her tirade are pretty funny as well.
    "Who replaced my thick sharpies with fine-tipped sharpies?! I'm signing autographs, not writing the Bible on a grain of rice!"
    "Look at this nonsense! Pencils, highlighters, a backscratcher?! If you're itchy, take care of it at home!"
    "How dare you try to calm me down with cake! Gimme that cake!"
• Pepe signing the birthday card for everyone with four or five pens simultaneously, and his follow-up comment that it takes him ten seconds to get clean in the shower.
• The subplot of Fozzie stealing Jay Leno's candy dish. Made even funnier by the fact that Leno later reveals that he stole that candy dish from George Carlin.
• When Piggy gets a hot stone massage, the Swedish Chef walks by and comments "Somebody's cookin' da bacon!?"
• Tying in with 'the band is always happy' gag from the pilot promo, Scooter has a solution to help Bobo with his daughter's cookie sales: sell to the band who have a serious case of the munchies.
  Animal: More boxes! More boxes!
  Bobo: *counting money* More boxes? Screw the mountain bike, my daughter's getting a Prius! Hehehehehe!

Bear Left Then Bear Write

• The video of Piggy falling in the cake, and the fact that Gonzo was able to get it past Kermit.
  • Christina suggest playing it in slow motion for the audience much to Piggy's obvious disapproval making it even funnier.
• The mention of Piggy's Japanese sake commercial: "Sake it to me, sexy boys!" Her correction makes it even funnier.
  Piggy: And the line was "Sex it to me, sake boys!"
• Fozzie getting hit with a dart and acting drunk.
• When Fozzie deliriously asks Kermit if he's ever gotten hit with a tranquilizer dart before, Kermit replies that he hasn't, but he licked his third cousin once and the walls started melting.
• Everything involving Chip, the I.T. guy, and the fact that not even the Muppets themselves remember him. Even more hilariously, he's an Author Avatar of Bill Prady.
• Piggy getting arrested for trying to film Christina Applegate getting "pranked".
• Fozzie struggling to hang up on Kermit, somehow ending up on Angry Birds.
  Kermit: (exasperated, to the camera, as Fozzie gets gas over the phone) ...it's been 30 minutes...
• Liam Hemsworth referring to Gonzo as an "elephant beaver".

Pig Out

• Fozzie launching T-shirts into the audience, but one of them malfunctions and then he accidentally shoots it at Statler, flinging him into the row behind him.
  • And later Pepe is sent to find his dentures which, once found, he promptly tries on.
    Pepe: Hey, look at me, I'm Bradley Cooper!
• The entire karaoke scene, but special mention goes to Swedish Chef singing "Rapper's Delight" and Sam's less-than-inspired rendition of "Wind Beneath My Wings" in an attempt to get Janice's attention, which ends with him dropping the mic and leaving the stage after it clearly doesn't work.
• When Kermit calls everyone to a meeting after the epic night out, he spots Bunsen and Beaker wearing each other's clothes.
  Bunsen: If it happens outside of work we don't owe 'em an explanation!
  • Just the sight of the Muppets hung over has to be one of the most funny things ever, especially Kermit's irritated reaction to it.
• The fact that Sam might have feelings for Janice.
• Speaking of Janice...
  Janice: Hey Kermit, there's this lecture on astral projection next Friday.
  Kermit: Oh, so you'd like the day off to go see it?
  Janice: No, I'll be here. I just thought I should tell you that I'll be there, too.
• Fozzie going back to Statler's hospital room, only to find him replaced with a pillow with a note saying "Sucker!" taped to it. Cue Big "NO!" from him.
  • Before that, Fozzie asks if Statler's in pain. Statler says it only hurts when he laughs, so he's safe with Fozzie in the room. This causes Statler to laugh, then moan in agony.
• Beaker's impression of Miss Piggy.
• Scooter without his glasses. His tiny eyes are very funny, but at the same time, a little creepy.
  Scooter: They came off when I was doing "Maniac" from Flashdance, and I stepped on them... like 400 times.
• According to the rat Yolanda, Ed Helms sat on her lap. She couldn't breathe but she still thought it was fun.
• The sight of Kermit feigning sadness, only to give the cheekiest smirk to himself, with a laugh to boot. Words can't do it justice.

Walk the Swine

• Miss Piggy gives Reese Witherspoon a genuine, heartfelt apology for their public feud at the house building site. In song.
  • Reese's WTF face throughout is something to see to believe.
  • Kermit lamenting on how the budget for that number could've built two houses.
  • Scooter's dance when Piggy starts rapping.
• Reese Witherspoon gloating about how she did all her own walking in Wild, but what makes it even funnier is the self-satisfied smirk she gives.
  • Just before that, Reese tells Piggy that this isn't a competition... then immediately turns that around and says that Piggy's going down.
• Piggy's "construction working" consists of hammering (with a bedazzled hammer, no less) a Port-a-Potty, with someone inside it.
• As payback for Fozzie making jokes about her during a standup act, Becky does a few of her own with a group of Muppets, culminating in them all singing "True Colors" to Fozzie because that song always makes him cry. As he gives a reflection afterwards Zoot comes in playing the song on saxophone. Fozzie then remarks that it sounds hauntingly beautiful on sax.
• "I grew up on a farm! I built cows and milked fences!"
• Fozzie's attempt to go back to his old material backfires horribly:
  Fozzie: So, it's a gaggle of geese, a pod of whales, and... what is it for buffalo?
  Random Guy In The Audience: GET OFF THE STAGE!
• This glorious line from Reese:
  You know what my ringtone is? The sound of people clapping when I won my Oscar. KABOOM!

The Ex-Factor

• The B-plot is the Electric Mayhem taking Kristin Chenoweth with them for Floyd's parents' anniversary. Suddenly they start arguing for no apparent reason and towards the end realize that Kristin is indirectly causing the arguing. So they leave her stranded on the side of the road.
  • This gem from the argument:
  Floyd: (to Dr. Teeth) You think the whole world revolves around you, but it doesn't. It revolves around the moon, and that's why we have winter!
  • "Uh, question about my seat belt. I think it's just a guitar strap, uh, connected to nothing..."
  • Animal practically forcing Kristin to have some Funyuns.
• Scooter's commentary on Kermit's plate.
• After showing off her framed thank you letter (from Queen Elizabeth, for the GoPro she got), Miss Piggy promptly drops it after Kermit reveals he needs her help getting a gift for Denise:
  Miss Piggy: So, who's your gift for, your mother, your aunt?
  Kermit: My girlfriend.
  Miss Piggy: (SMASH!) Oh, how sweet...
  • Bonus points for the look of frozen pseudo-happiness on her face.
• "Okay, so you just made the word 'gift' sound weird now."
• Pepe asking Cheryl if she wants to meet him by the oopsie bin.
• Kermit on not having anything good to give Denise for their anniversary.
  Kermit: The only thing I have to give her is a punch card from Cinnabon, and I’m still seven Cinnabons away from a free Bon. That’s not a gift! That’s a burden!

Pig's in a Blackout

• The entire Cold Open, but special mention goes to Kermit saying Patrick Dempsey can't come to the show and has to be replaced by a stick of butter. Rizzo then tweets that Piggy will be on the show dreaming that she's making out with said stick of butter.
• The Humiliation Conga suffered while the show is under Scooter's guidance.
  • The mere fact that the show has gone to shambles without Kermit, doubling as a Call-Back to this episode of The Muppet Show.
• What Scooter thinks is the oldest saying in Hollywood:
  "This is where we should put Hollywood."
• Scooter accidentally calling Kermit his father.
• This exchange:
  Kermit: Pepe, Rizzo, stop messing with Chip!
  Chip: They were messing with me? I have friends!
• Miss Piggy sobbing over her ruined winter wardrobe.
  • Uncle Deadly chewing out poor Scooter.
    Scooter: What happened?
    Uncle Deadly: (quickly rounding on Scooter) Condensation from the broken AC drenched and destroyed Piggy's new winter collection! This is on your head, boy!
    Scooter: I'm so sorry!
    Uncle Deadly: They're all ruined...except this blue shrug she's wearing now which, between you and me, makes her look a little sausage-y.
  • As Piggy frantically grasps at the hope that her wardrobe can be salvaged some kind of way, Uncle Deadly grabs her face and bluntly insists "They're gone." Cue Piggy wailing "NO!"
• The episode ends with Kermit in the swamp he built in his backyard playing "The Rainbow Connection"... excluding a brief interruption:
  Kermit: (singing) Why are there so many song about rainbows-
  Kermit's Neighbor: (offscreen) LEARN A NEW SONG!
  Kermit: (yelling) Chill out, Phil! (sigh) (resumes singing) And what's on the other side?

Too Hot to Handler

• Early on, Kermit gives a little speech about Fozzie... then it's revealed that he's actually talking to Bobo, who thought it was just a Confession Cam segment and wasn't listening. It happens again later on with Sam.
• "TOO MUCH SUGAR!!!"
• Floyd, Janice and Zoot thinking that Kermit has been replaced by a robot. In The Stinger, they set up a test to see if it's true - a plate of cookies with a sign reading "Free Cookies for Robots". Kermit skips the cookies and has a banana instead, but then Animal eats the cookies, and the others now think he's a robot.
• Fozzie shooting identification ads for various cities in ridiculous costumes. He wears a Benjamin Franklin costume for Philadelphia, an Elvis costume for Memphis, and a Viking helmet for Minneapolis/St. Paul. The last is slipped on right when he's telling Kermit to take him seriously.
• During his date with Chelsea Handler, Scooter starts spouting useless trivia about her that he learned from her page on That Other Wiki.
• The sheer utter ridiculousness of the setup, with dorky Manchild Scooter falling madly in love with Chelsea Handler. And Chelsea actually being into him, to the point of not wanting to scare him off by rushing things:
  Chelsea Handler: I could go back to my high school moves.
  Scooter: Erm... how about junior high?

Going, Going, Gonzo

• Everything about Piggy Water, and Piggy's endless attempts to promote it, going so far as to have it sponsor Gonzo's cannon act.
  • At one point Sam refers to Gonzo as "The Great Gonzo Brought To You By Piggy Water".
  Kermit: (Reading the nutrition facts) Thirty grams of fat?! It's water!
• The "Fly Me To The Moon" segment, complete with Gonzo flying around on the rafters and landing in the refreshment table.
  Gonzo: That.. was... AWESOME!
  • It also makes a nice Call-Back to the balloon scene ("About seven knots!") in The Muppet Movie.
• The cast comparing their dreams:
  • Bobo saying that he always wanted to be a Chicago bear, and then clarifies that he doesn't mean the football team, he just wants to live in Chicago.
  • Sam saying he'd like to serve in Congress, but can't even get on his condo's board of directors, apparently since he won't share his fabric softener. Later, he says that he finally shared with one of his neighbors, and somehow got roped into babysitting his kids.
  • Chip at first denying that he has a dream, then saying via Confession Cam that he'd like to tap-dance around the world.
• Gonzo tries to get out of the stunt by telling Sam the possibility that he might die violently on camera. Sam is actually okay with this - enthusiastic, even - so long as Gonzo doesn't swear when he does. Sam calls the potential explosion of viscera, "Good, clean family fun."
• The drum-off between Dave Grohl and Animal. It ends in a draw after both have thrashed their drum sets and tell the other "You win".
  Dave Grohl: [taps cymbal] Oh, what's that? A bell? Time for school.
• Joseph Gordon-Levitt admitting that even he didn't understand the plot of Looper.
• Joseph then revealing he's been playing the Muppets when he wins, through The Power of Acting.
• While they're playing poker, all Carl cares about is that someone ate all the good stuff in the Chex Mix.
  Big Mean Carl: All I've got left are these little brown discs.

Single All the Way

• Big Mean Carl's rendition of "The Night Before Christmas":
  Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse, because I told him to shut up!
• Janice comparing Mindy Kaling's Hollywood Tone-Deaf singing to her releasing demons from her soul.
• Gonzo somehow confuses Echosmith with Aerosmith.
• When Kermit gets Christmas lights dropped on him. It's hilarious because it comes out of nowhere.
• There's something funny about seeing Sweetums, one of the largest Muppets, interacting with Yolanda, one of the smallest, especially on this show's realistic sets.
• Sam's jumping in surprise after turning around to spot Chip standing there, staring at him.

Swine Song

• The branding expert's name is pronounced "Pache", but he spells it as "Pizza".
• The Reality Subtext regarding the show's winter hiatus and subsequent retool.
• This gem from Deadly: “She thinks she can speak Spanish now. It’s a nightmare… a nightmare!”
  • Related: Piggy named her penguin Gloria Estefan because it was the only Spanish name she could think of.
• When Kermit enthuses that the Muppets aren't all that tech-savvy, we're treated to Animal talking to a muffin as if it were Siri.

A Tail of Two Piggies

• Chip telling the other Muppets about how he was born with a tail that was surgically removed...and how he kept it on a necklace he wears because he believes he'll be reincarnated with it someday. Big Mean Carl then yells at Chip, startling him and the others.
• When Kermit asks the Muppets to put away the newspaper with Piggy's tail mishap on the front, Big Mean Carl obliges by eating Scooter, who was holding the paper.
• The sheer contrast of the "Unveil the Tail" ad alternating between real-life people and Muppets dramatically staring into the camera.
• Rizzo telling Gonzo about Big Mean Carla:
  Rizzo: Big Mean Carl’s sister is a real estate agent. Yeah, she got my brother a great place! There was a bidding war and she just ate the other buyer alive.
  Gonzo: Oh, she sounds like a great negotiator.
  Rizzo: No, no, I’m saying she ate him. While he was still alive. And then my brother got the place.
• Yolanda worries about her job when she overhears that Kermit might need to fire some people for budget reasons:
  Yolanda: Where else am I gonna find a job where I can take an hour-long nap every day and they don't mind?
  Kermit: ...you take an hour-long nap every day?!
  Yolanda: (cheerily) Yeah, and you don't mind!
  • Followed by Zoot's confession to Yolanda at the end of the scene:
  Zoot: Y'know what? I'm nappin' right now.
  Yolanda: (pauses, shrugs and walks off)
  Zoot: Zzzzzz....
• The round of "Piggy or Kardashian?" It's even funnier during the credits.

Got Silk?

• Gonzo, Rizzo and Pepe arguing about their lunch:
  Pepe: No, no, no! I sit in this stinky room writing jokes all day long! I am not having burgers from an island-themed restaurant again!
  Gonzo: Pepe — "Island-themed" just means there's a pineapple on your burger! You take it off!
  Rizzo: Yeah, but you can't get rid of the juice!
  Gonzo: You're a rat! I've seen you eat garbage!
  Rizzo: Not with pineapple on it!
• Pepe trying and failing to impersonate Al Capone.
  "Heeeeeyyy! Oooooooh! Chicagoooooooooo!" *pause* "...I... don't know much about the guy."
• Deadly mentions to Piggy that he's organizing a community theater production of Clueless, and at the end of the episode it's revealed that one of the actors had to bail at the last minute, so he's forced to play the role of Cher, the main heroine. Hearing Deadly use Cher's Valley Girl slang in his usual deep, refined voice is nothing short of hilarious.

Little Green Lies

• Kermit trusts the Muppets to keep up the facade that he and Piggy are still together for Robin's sake. Once Robin walks in, they all run off screaming.
  • Scooter has issues with lying, so Kermit just tells him he and Piggy are back together. And Scooter buys it.
• The Muppets in laser tag. Period.
  Piggy: "The only thing I use lasers for is burning weird things off my body. I don't think tag is for me. (One jumpcut later)FEAR MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
  • Scooter almost exposes to Robin that Kermit and Piggy broke up. Piggy and Kermit's response? Shoot him with lasers, even though they're on the same team.
  • Kermit and Piggy recalling a beautiful time they had together...when Piggy accidentally performed for a dictator shortly before a populist uprising.
    Kermit: "If there was anything left of that city, I'd go back there in a second."
  • When Piggy and Kermit are exposed, Scooter gives us this gem.
    Scooter: "NO! You made me the first person in the world to lie on Twitter!"
• Big Mean Carl, a clear lady's man.
  Big Mean Carl: Hey, Spencer, I ain't shavin' nothin! Let's get that outta way!(Vomits up Foo Foo)
  • "Ya like wet puppies, Laura?"
• Robin explaining why his parents broke up.
  Robin: "My mom likes quiet nights in and my dad likes my teacher."
  • "You know, I knew something was up when Fozzie said 'Kermit and Piggy are broken up.' and then he said to himself 'I see dead people.'"
• The reveal that Camilla actually had two extremely beautiful women waiting that would've been happy to hang out with Pepe and Rizzo. Too bad they didn't show up.
  • Then they have a pillow fight, but the pillows feel like memory foam, so where did all the feathers flying around come from? Camera pan to Camilla trying to cover herself up.

Generally Inhospitable

• The episode opens with Rizzo, Yolanda, and Pepe editing a mustache over Piggy.
  • Then they edit an eye on Pizza's forehead when Kermit asks them to keep an eye on him.
• Everyone's reactions to Piggy's broken leg.
  Bobo: "Oh no, not good. Passing out. Passing out!"
  • While Piggy is denying the injury, Swedish Chef walks in with food, takes on look at her, drops his plate, and passes out.
• Deadly trying to wrangle Piggy:
  Deadly: I've got her cornered! Somebody get me a butterfly net!
  • Shortly thereafter, Sweetums obliges, bringing forth a gigantic butterfly net:
  Sweetums: I'm gonna need this back by Friday. I'm goin' to a meadow!
• Piggy attempting to escape the hospital on an elderly man's wheelchair.
• Kermit and Deadly walk in to find the doctor trying to remove Piggy's false eyelashes:
  Doctor: Miss Piggy, no one is going to see you. You're not doing your show tonight. I need to operate on that leg, and you can't wear makeup during surgery!
  Kermit: Surgery?!
  Piggy: No show?
  Deadly: No MAKEUP?!?! ...Could we get a second opinion?
• The return of "Veterinarian's Hospital", and Rowlf and Janice's patient is some poor unsuspecting woman at the hospital where Miss Piggy is staying.
  Janice: (carrying a hammer) Just here to check your reflexes.
  Woman: Oh, hell no! Not with that thing!
  Janice: Reflexes seem fine.
• The subplot of the Muppets locking Pizza in a closet after Big Mean Carl eats his phone.
  • The Muppets dancing the Pizza's ringtone music blaring out of Big Mean Carl's mouth.
  • "Remember all those times where we really didn't think things through and it works out okay? Yeah, I don't think this is one of those times."
• Piggy on morphine.
  "King Tut and Jolly Green Giant, am I right!? Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
  "I'm painting my face and it feels amazing, Captain Unicorn!"
  "I love you, hand-sanitizer dispenser thingy, and you too, tiny space cowboy and tiny talking giraffe."
• Fozzie misinterpreting Bobo's gestures to stretch the show.

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