Funny / Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014)

"M.C. Mikey!"

• Everybody's lame confessions when they think they're going to die after defeating Shredder:
  Donnie: I'm the one that licks the icing off the Pop-Tarts and puts them back in the box!
  Mikey: I so did not understand the ending of Lost!
• As the Turtles look at the monitors detailing a hostage situation in the subway, Mikey points out a monitor showing a cat on a keyboard playing "Chopsticks" with chopsticks.
• Whilst in the middle of celebrating a victory, bragging about how they were unseen by anyone, the Turtles are followed by April, who promptly takes a photograph of them in the middle of a group high-five (three?).
  "What was that?"
  "It's a camera flash..."
  • Donnie being left hanging.
• "Oh, look, he's doin' his Batman voice!"
  "I only saw Batman once!"
• Taylor calls her mom and says that she wants to move back from New York 'cause her roommate was freaking her out after she knows about the Turtles' real origin.
  Taylor: Mom, I wanna move back home.
• After Splinter catches the Turtles coming back from sneaking out, Donnie tries to make an excuse by claiming he forgot to soak his retainer in an attempt to get away but Splinter stops him. Mikey tries to pretend he was sleepwalking. It doesn't work.
• Splinter is later punishing the boys for their silence about why they left their home with various balancing exercises. Everyone is roughly holding on, and then he breaks out the pizza when Mikey claims that he's in the zone and wouldn't break - the "legendary" 99 cheese pizza, which proves too much for Mikey. What even sells more of the scene is when Splinter starts listing some of the supposed cheeses used in the pizza in an over the top fashion, each cheese having the older turtles begging Mikey to not spill. Splinter only gets to the fifth one - mozzarella - before Mikey cracks.
  • The various balancing acts are also count. Raph is forced to stand one legged on a tricycle while he knits a sweater, Donnie is forced to bounce a ping pong ball while on a spinning board, Leo is forced to balance eggs on his head, foot, and hand while doing the splits, and Mikey is forced to stand on his head upside-down on a swivel chair.
• During the flashback scene of Splinter explaining their origins to April, there's a scene where a young Leonardo is cutting up and serving up the slices of pizza. One slice lands on Splinter's head, to Leo's chagrin.
• Michelangelo tries to calm down April when she sees the Turtles for the first time. What makes it funny is that he thought she was scared by the mask and not the fact that there are big talking turtles. Seeing his real face causes her to faint.
• April calling them "Ninja Mutant Turtle Teenagers". Donnie notes that when she puts it like that it sounds ridiculous.
• Leo warning April not to tell anyone about them, or they'd find her. Mikey agrees and taunts "Yeeeeaaah, we'll find you, O'Neil". He then walks off camera before almost immediately returning on-screen, apologizing for sounding super-creepy, though quickly adding "We will find you though".
• "Well, is there anything else we should know about them?" "...They're ninjas."
  • Which followed the ultimate "Message Received":
  Vernon: "So they're aliens?"
  April: "No, that's stupid. They're turtles."
• The Turtles all dancing to "Hollaback Girl" in a flashback.
• Shredder actually says "Tonight I dine on turtle soup!" This is actually a pretty obscure Mythology Gag; he said the exact same line in the first season of the 1987 cartoon after menacing the turtles with a Retro-Mutagen Raygun.
• This exchange
  Raphael: "DRIVE!!!"
  Vernon: "You're a talking turtle."
  Raphael: "Yeah. Yeah, I'm a talkin' turtle. And you're a human nerd. Now that we got that out of the way, hit it!"
  • Which is quickly followed up by Vernon having the confused realization that he has no clue how a gigantic turtle was able to enter the van from the back without him noticing.
  • There's also his mild indignation over being accused of being a nerd, of all things.
• While hiding in the back of the van, Raph hears Vern bragging to April about "almost becoming a ninja one day" and rolls his eyes in response to this.
• Leo, Donnie, and Mikey hyped up on adrenaline.
• Donnie's Oh, Crap! reaction to the Foot soldiers having guns, with a high-pitched voice to add to it.
  • During the snow chase, April leans out the window to record it. Vernon asks what she's doing...until realizing that it gives him an amazing view of April's rear end and telling her to make sure she gets everything. And then immediately plows the truck straight through a massive snow bank right in front of them.
• Donatello asking his brothers to let him be the badass for once. And this crosses with Moment of Awesome, since he actually kicks some ass.
• The Turtles take an elevator to to get to their fight with the Shredder. During the wait, Mikey starts tapping his nunchucks and beatboxing. The rest of the brothers initially try to ignore him before eventually joining in, and when the door opens they all rush out screaming.
  • Especially hilarious is when Leo starts headbanging, and the fact that Raph is the first to join in.
  • There's a sign on the elevator wall that says "NOTICE: WEAPONS OF ANY KIND PROHIBITED". All four turtles have their weapons drawn in anticipation of the upcoming battle.
  • There's another sign on the elevator wall reading "Safety Requires Teamwork".
• As the Turtles try to rush Shredder, Michelangelo tries to shout "Cowabunga!" That is, until Shredder kicks everyone but Leonardo in the face.
• This exchange:
  Leo: Donnie, what are the odds of us surviving?
  Donnie: 0.00003%.
  Leo: I'll take it.
• Mikey doing the "Mind: Blown" gesture.
• Michelangelo accidentally blows up Vernon's new car with the Turtle Van's guns.
  *sheepishly* "My bad. Still figuring out the buttons."
  • And Vern's reaction to this is just priceless.
  Vern: [shocked] That was my new Fenwick Express! I—I just bought it!
• The Pizza Hut commercial, in which the brothers break in, Donnie makes Cheesy Bites, and they vanish without a trace... followed by a hilariously Narmy "Thanks to the Ninja Turtles Cheesy Bites are back!" from the narrator.
• The turtles trying to sneak into Sacks' tower to stop the Shredder's plans, only to run into a room filled with a bunch of armed Foot soldiers. There's several beats of silence (during which we literally hear a pin drop as well as Mikey and even Raph giving little waves to the Foot-members), before the Foot charge.
  Donnie: Not the elevator.
  Leo: Nope.
• Mikey singing along to "Happy Together" to try and impress April. The movie manages to not ruin the joke by never reminding the audience that the song was a hit for...The Turtles.
  • And as the turtles drive off, with the other three trying to get Mikey to shut up, the audience can just make out this conversation between Raph and Leo:
    Raph, Donnie & Leo: (simultaneously) SHUT UP, MIKEY!!!
    Raph: Leo, I'm going to hit him.
    Leo: Raph! Not in the mouth!
• The Turtle's van horn is a jingle version of the original theme song (specifically the "heroes in a half shell" lyric)
• Raphael getting a classic interaction with Michelangelo:
  Mikey: NO! Leo! April! And that other guy! They were so young... So beautiful...
  Raph: [speeding past] They ain't dead, numbnuts!
  Mikey: Oh. Right on!
• Early on in the movie, Raph questions Leo's leadership by asking who put him in charge to begin with. Leo's response? Your Dad.
  Raph: [shoves Leo] And who put you in charge?
  Leo: You know who did.
  Mikey: Ooh, tension. It's been, like, thirty whole minutes since you guys had this argument.
• Mikey and Raph, jumping around at the end, in broad daylight, and then hiding from the people below by crouching on the boobs of a Victoria's Secret billboard.
• Eric Sacks explains the end goal of the evil plan: He will become rich (or, richer cause he already lives in a mansion). He then clarifies that he means stupid rich.
• After freaking out about the count-down timer and how old the code is for it, Donnie is so overjoyed when he stops the release that he forgets he's in the middle of a fight:
  Donnie: Bam! System disabled! Who wants Italian?! I'm buying! Tiramisu for everybody — AH! *knife flies past chest*

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