Funny / Less is Morgue

Per wiki policy, Spoilers Off applies here and all spoilers are unmarked. You Have Been Warned.

Season 1

Pizza Time

• The Agamemnon Condoms Ad. Zeus shilling condoms to pay for his "hefty child support bills" is too good to miss.
• Evelyn's attempts to rein in Riley's murderous nature.
  Riley: Oh yeah, sure, I can just “invite” people “over.” [Beat] You can’t see it, listeners, but I just did air quotes. Because that’s ridiculous.
  Evelyn: It’s not ridiculous! You just have to remember not to murder everyone so hard when you meet them!
  Riley: I don’t murder everyone.
  Evelyn: Name five people you know that aren’t dead. Family don't count.
  Riley: Ha! That’s easy. Um...you? ah, fuck. No. Give me more time.
• The death and failed ascension of Jon the Pizza Man. He's abruptly eaten by Riley, then almost sent to Hell for digital piracy.
• Azfar isn't around for long, but he gets his fair share of laughs.
  Evelyn: You can't take him to hell for it! That just feels like overkill.
  Azfar: I’m a demon, kid, overkill is my middle name. Well, actually, it's [DemonicShriek] , but who the hell can put that in the shownotes? Now, come along, Papa Johns, we just finished polishing the slide covered in razor blades.

Be our Guests

• Pretty much everything Magical Erik says.
  Erik: As a soothsayer, I can say the sooth, the whole sooth, and nothing but the sooth.
• When he actually attempts to contact Evelyn, things really get out of hand.
  Erik: The spirits! They move through me! ''[He begins speaking in tongues]
• When Evelyn finally shows him some real paranormal activity, he runs away screaming.
  Erik: Fuck this, I can’t die now, think of my investments! [Erik runs away.]
  Riley: Well, that was fucking dreadful.
• When Brains Vincent is being interviewed by Evelyn, Riley's attempts to keep their Horror Hunger under wraps are darkly hilarious. It ends about as well as you think.
• Jon's extremely brief cameo in the episode.
• Tiffany. This incorrigible stoner drives Riley and Evelyn to the brink of insanity with her head-ass logic and her very unique Metal Scream.

Video Killed The Podcast Star

• The various fake movies and TV shows presented in the episode all qualify.
  • A terrible shounen school anime called "F."
  • An Isekai about a salaryman who travels to a fantastical world and immediately dies of the plague.
  • A retelling of the Oedipus Rex set in the far future.
  • Whatever the hell "Grave Boat" is.
• Evelyn's favorite childhood TV show was Middle-Aged Tree Men, a parody of 80s toy shows. They begin to notice something isn't right when the characters are making strangely modern references.
  Redwood: You poor misguided villain. Let’s take a selfie with him, Silverbirch!
  Silverbirch: Dab! Dab! I’m dabbing, Redwood, watch me dab!
• How do our heroes stop Morby, the episode's Eldritch Abomination villain? By tricking him into inhabiting the shitty TV remake of Heathers.

Eternal Slumber Party

• Riley's attempt at an aphorism.
  Riley: I told you, I'm already drinking Elmer's school glue tonight. And you know what they say: wine before glue, good for you, but glue before wine, it's suffering time.
  Evelyn: ...Do they say that?
  Riley: I do. I'm they.
• The duo's game of Truth or Dare goes quickly off the rails.
  Riley: If aliens came for you, and gave you the choice between stabbing a clone of yourself through the brain with a spear, or carrying one of their human-alien hybrid test tube babies, and if you didn’t pick one they would blow up the whole earth…..what would you do?
  Evelyn: You know, when I used to play this with my friends it was stuff like...what’s your worst nightmare ... have you ever peed in the shower...would you make out with your boss….
  Riley: That’s weak shit. Answer the question.
• The realization that Brains Vincent's severed head is still alive, and hangs out with Jon in the bathroom.
• The implication that Bloody Mary once had a thing with the Slender Man.
  Bloody Mary: Well, he’s tall, and he’s a sharp dresser, and he’s super mysterious - you can never tell what he’s thinking... because he doesn’t have a face. So hot.

Todd's Heaven

• Todd's Beeble - the Holy Book of Todd's Heaven.
• The "Now That's What I Call Noise 17" ad.
  Spokesman: If you call in with promo code [screams], we’ll add a dollar to the price. “Now That’s What I Call Noise 17.” It’s relentless.
• The introduction of "The Sword of R'lyeh", Riley's self-insert fantasy novel.
  Riley: “...And R’lyeh strikes the foul beast again with their sword, and screams, ‘In the modern world, you can make a living off of creativity if you find your audience! It’s called Patreon, bitch!’—”
• Todd's insanely uncomfortable humming rendition of Hansen's "Mmmbop."
• Riley and Evelyn kicking Todd's ass at Monopoly, leaving him awkwardly begging for mercy.
  Todd: Oh, come on, can’t you just bend the rules for once and show me a little compassion?
  Riley: That’s not really in line with the spirit of the game, Todd. Monopoly’s a bloodsport, and you just got bled.

Fiscal Responsibility - The Scariest Monster of All

• After Riley breaks the format and steals Evelyn's lines, Evelyn gets even.
  Evelyn: Well, you stole my part, so that means I get to do the weird fact.
  Riley: [scoff] Sure, you try to do the weird fact. The weird fact takes years of training to properly master.
  Evelyn: Uhhh...Sea cucumbers eat through their butts?
  Riley: Eh, close enough.
• The series of bizarre products Riley and Evelyn bought on Amazon.
• Riley's rivalry with the Alexa.
  Riley: Okay. We may have a problem here.
  Alexa: You have many problems, Riley.
  Riley: Fuck off, Alexa.
  Alexa: Don’t hate me because you ain't me, meatbag.
• Todd's cameo in the Spotify ad.
• Blackbeard being a surprising financial expert.
  Blackbeard: When you manage a business, the onus is on ye to know the ins and outs of finances. In other words: You best start believing in economies, kids, you’re in one!

You Will Not Get This Episode

• Riley's cartoonishly loud blinking.
• The dramatic entrance of Shaz. Complete with dabbing, and being played in (by the own demand) by Riley playing Megalovania on the keyboard.
• Shaz's plan for actually being able to talk to Evelyn: Getting so high on an insane cocktail of drugs that they can see ghosts.
  Shaz: It’s a Louisiana Clam Slammer, with a personal twist- I keep the vodka and tobasco, but instead of celery, I use shrooms, instead of a lemon wedge, I use a tab of acid, and instead of clam juice I use 300 mL of Ny Quil. And then just a pinch of Lush’s ‘French Kiss’, just to take the edge off a little.
• The reason Riley can no longer use Uber.
  Riley: Oh, did you try to take the face off of your driver to prove he was a reptilian, too?
• Riley's increasing rage as the podcast is derailed by Shaz's highness and Evelyn's willingness to enable them.
  Riley: I want to kill everyone in this room.

The Day of the Schlorp

• Riley starts the episode teasing Evelyn about her fears of a coming pudding-themed apocalypse. Riley changes her tune when Evelyn lets slip that she thinks they're going to Hell.
  Riley: Oh, it’s getting close. Just ten seconds. Prepare to evacuate soul.
  Evelyn: I don’t know what I’m going to do when I’m a wandering ghost alone in a world of pudding, and you’re where the bad people go.
  Riley: Three, two… Wait, I’m going where?
• Brother Puddonius really, really wants to get closer to his fellow cult members.
  Thackery Boggs: Well, you wouldn’t eat a pig’s kidney until it was coated in gravy.
  Evelyn: I wouldn’t eat a pig’s kidney, period. Also, what!?
  Brother Puddonius: What the exalted one means to say is that we all must slather each other with gravy!
  Thackery Boggs: No, it doesn’t! Brother, you must stop.
• Death just being an exhausted, overworked, absent father.
  Evelyn: Jeez. No offence, Death, but you're kind of a downer.
  Death: Oh, I'm sorry! You realise I'm the Grim Reaper, right? Not the happy, fluffy, rainbows and puppies Reaper.
• Jon's cameo.
  Jon: Hey, Riley. Do you know where those guys went? One of them said he was going to slather pudding on me and I was kind of into it.
  Riley: You’ll see them in hell, Jon.

Medium; Tarrare

• Riley is hilariously eager to try out the new barbecue joint.
  Riley: So much choice. Damn my limited internal real-estate.
• The sheer absurdity of the Last Chance Texas-Style Barbecue certainly applies.
  Barbecue Dad: You’ll go absolutely buck wild for Grandma’s famous brisket rolls. What’s our secret recipe? What are you, a cop? Don’t ask me that. Shut up.
• Tarrare's resentment of podcasts for their treatment of him.
  Tarrare: Podcasts are the bane of my non-existence. The only time anyone speaks my name these days is when my tragic life story is being trotted out for cheap laughs on quirky comedy podcasts. I did not eat that baby, damn it! I did not!
  Riley: Uh, nobody said you did?
  Tarrare: Justin McElroy said I did.
• Evelyn teases Riley in the aftermath of their overindulgence.
  Evelyn: How do I put this...you ordered like four whole meals, and looking at you right now, I feel like people would offer you their seat on the bus.

Floridian Gothic

• The return of Tiffany leads to some guaranteed laughs.
  Riley: No, no, no, not again! This is the one apocalyptic contingency I didn't prepare for: Terminal stoner dipshittery.
• Riley is stashing their Dad away in the bathroom, and he's keeping himself amused by watching sports on a portable TV. Jon really wishes he could be involved.
  Teddy: Dang, that right there is some good sports. I wish I had someone to talk to about it.
  Pizza Ghost Jon: Being dead sure is fun. I love not being able to join in on conversations aBOUT THE TH Ing S I LOVE.
• Florida Man may be full of nightmare fuel, but he's also pretty funny. From his obsession with meth to his incredibly strange and specific threats.
• His final speech also qualifies.
  Florida Man: I’m wherever there is true Floridian spirit to be found. Every time someone tosses an alligator through the drive thru window at McDonald's as a prank, I’ll be there. Every time a drunk spring breaker falls off a hotel balcony, I’ll be there. Every time someone’s baby shoots them by accident, I’ll be there. Because Florida isn’t a place…. it’s a state of being. And the real Florida...is right here.
  Riley: ...Why are you pointing to my boob? That’s not where my heart is.
  Florida Man: I know.
  Tiffany: That was beautiful.

Better Off Fred

• The episode's ad, which features Scott shilling sex toys in the style of a monster truck rally commercial.

"WE LIVE IN A GODLESS, HEDONISTIC SOCIETY AND IT’S ALL THANKS TO US - GENTLE FEMININE SOLUTIONS LTD, IN CORN-FUCK NEBRASKA. [yodeling sound effect] BE THERE! OR ELSE!"

The Irate Outdoors

• Riley referring to Klyle's rival stealing his wife as "[Pulling] the old Smack Sack Fuck n' Cuck."
• The absurdly long raspberry that Nosferatina blows at Riley and Evelyn to annoy them.

Little Workshop of Horrors

• The repeated references to Riley's self-insert character riding a whale to the moon, as well as Riley's insistence that the scene is meant to be taken completely serious.

Riley: It was supposed to be an epic and uplifting reflection on the limitations of gravity!

Shaz: That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard and if you didn’t want me to think it was funny, you shouldn’t have put it in there!

• Murray, despite being thousands of miles away, is still genuinely scared that Riley can come through the screen and hit him.

Chortle at Riley's Bones

• Ryan Loeball. He's one of the few people so infuriating that Evelyn not only breaks out the demon voice but also very nearly drops an F-bomb.
  Ryan: 25 cents.
  Riley: That’s not an answer! Answer my question, Loeball!
  Ryan: I don’t want to.
  Riley: I WILL HAVE YOU DOXXED.
  Ryan: 10 cents. It’s gonna go down every time you yell at me.
  Evelyn: What is wrong with you?
  Ryan: 5.
  Evelyn: You MOTHER-
• Lilith empowering Riley to find their own family and Evelyn declaring herself Riley's new mom is a heartwarming moment, but it's also hilarious with how enthusiastic Evelyn gets about it.
  Evelyn: Riley, do you know what this means?!
  Riley: What?
  Evelyn: (utterly thrilled) It means I can be your mom now!
  Riley: No.
  Evelyn: I can remind you to eat your vegetables!!
  Riley: Nooo!
  Evelyn: And make you feel valued!
  Riley: Enough! This is getting way to Oedipal for my tastes!
  Evelyn: Don't talk back to your mother like that, Riley!

Moby Tit

Basically the ENTIRE episode, with its constant boob puns, the jokes about Evelyn's boobs, and Captain Cishmale acting like a boob. With that said...

• Shortly after criticizing the depiction of boobs in anime, Riley immediately starts making jokes about Evelyn's "bazongas".
  Riley: I’m just pointing out that you should have more of an opinion on this, seeing as you've got more lived experience with breasticular discrimination than I do, considering I’m a member of the itty bitty titty committee, and you’re the president of the United States of having Huge Jugs.
• When Cishmale and Chip arrive, Riley shoots the latter with their crossbow. Evelyn tries to get them to take it down a notch, when:
  'Cishmale: Aye! The one with the mountainous mammaries is right! We mean ye no harm!
  SOUND: Boat flips over. SPLASH.
  Cishmale: Man overboard, man overboard!
  Chip: Boy overboard, boy overboard!
  Riley: Ev, did you just poltergeist-capsize their boat?
  Evelyn: [Defensive] What? It's more humane than a crossbow.
• "The Breast."^note Rhymes with beast "Don't you mean 'The Beast'?" "He obviously doesn't, Riley."
• The fact that Riley is down to kill an innocent SkyBoob simply because it fucked up their podcast's audio.
  Riley: Look, Evelyn. I see where you’re coming from. But whether it’s a boob, a super gator, or a goddamn floating testicle, you mess with the audio, you get shot-io.
• After the ad break, the four make it to open waters.
  Riley: It still kind of amazes me that you managed to do that.
  Evelyn: Yeah, the rest of this all follows facts and logic.
  Cishmale: Poppycock! Facts and logic are just the names I gave me testes! I lost me logic fighting the first of the breasts, but by Davy Jones’ Jockstrap, the second will not claim me facts!
  Riley: Will you please stop talking?
• While the gang is out on the ocean, they run into some nuclear super gators. No worries, because Riley came prepared with their crossbow.
  Riley: This is for Steve Irwin, you scaly bitch!
  Chip: Wasn’t it a stingray that killed Steve Irwin?
  Evelyn: Steve Irwin’s dead?!
• At one point, Chip wants to see Evelyn:
  Chip: How big are her boobies?
  Cishmale: Good question, lad. They’re somewhere between a Z and a Z minus.
  Evelyn: You don’t know how cup sizes work, do you?
  Cishmale: Nobody does. Those letters are arcane! Just like W-2 forms. I’m not a dependent. I don’t even know the meaning of the word!
  Chip: It means—
  Cishmale: [Furious] Every second with you! Stop being so dependent on my approval!
• Evelyn decides that dealing with Moby Tit requires "the gentle touch of a lesbian."
  Riley: You speak Boob?
  Evelyn: I speak for the boobs, for the boobs have no tongues.
  Riley: What are you on right now?