Funny / Front Mission 5

• 5 has several gems in its intermission dialogues. One of them involves a scientist you can recruit explaining nuclear energy and its applications to an elite pilot, who simply does not get what he's going on about until we get this: "Umm...magic beams?"
• Edward, being a clownish, Token Black Friend type, is the source of quite a few of these in 5:
  • When Walter is released from the hospital after nearly dying from wounds suffered from Taking the Bullet for Lynn, Ed has Lily Pho, one of the Strike Wyverns recruits, try to cheer him up with a song full of Moe and Brother–Sister Incest innuendos. Lily then asks if you liked it. No matter which response you choose, the result is amusing:
  Walter: What.
  Lily: "Damn that Edward! I knew he was setting me up! He's dead!"
  Or...
  Walter: "That made me very happy. Could you do it again?"
  Lily: "...ew, so pervy."
  • Another instance is the opening of the Cambodian base defense mission, in which a high wall and long ramp limit the enemy's access to the base... or so Ed thinks:
  Edward: "Heh, this'll be a piece of cake!"
  (Enemy Wanzers jump over the walls using jetpacks, which are not available for the player in this game.)
  Edward: "HEY! NO FAIR! THAT'S CHEATING!"
  • The look on Ed's face is what really sells it.
  • One mission has your team attacking O.C.U. missile silos. After you've cleared all the enemies, Edwards has his dumb moment where he totally forgot about the silo... Cue Lynn yelling through the comm.
• The cutscene before Mission 11 of 5, in which Hector is a Dirty Old Man, and keeps acting like he and Lynn used to be in a relationship, interposed with dispensing sage advice to Walter.
  • And then after Mission 11, Hector discloses some... embarrassing information about Lynn (her room was full of pictures of Walter), causing her to flip out and try to shoot him. Hector makes his escape by casually walking off the oil rig, only to somehow land inside a passing USN helo. Bonus points for nonchalantly ignoring Lynn's attempt to kill him.
• During the Barghest arc of 5, for many times Non Player Characters patronize Walter... only to shit themselves when they realize the guy they've been dismissing is a war hero.
  • A standout case is this: When Walter is visiting Fort Monus, he exchanges greetings with his old CO, who is being transferred. The arrogant replacement begins talking smack about how Walter's some lowly hick who doesn't know anything and he'll be put in his place... and then his old CO smiles and tells the replacement that he's talking to a highly decorated combat veteran, former commander of the Marines' premier assault unit, and a Barghest operator, who can kick his ass in or outside a wanzer.