Funny / Carmilla the Series

• In general: Elise Bauman deserves a REWARD for all the facial expressions she gives for Laura's performance. They. Are. HILARIOUS!
• When Perry tries to bring up Carmilla's "stellar" roommate qualities, Carm completely ignores her and begins changing her shirt. Laura, who was listening to the conversation while extremely pissed off at Carmilla, can be seen in the foreground being momentarily completely distracted by Carmilla's back.
• Laura's dorky little happy dance during the seventh episode of Season 1 just after Danny leaves the room, which is also tremendously heartwarming.
• After Laura, Perry, and Danny all figure out that Carmilla is a vampire (and LaFontaine realizes the others are just catching up to them), what gets Danny's attention isn't that Carmilla is a vampire, not that she might be behind the kidnappings, not even that Laura might be her next target. No, what makes Danny get invested in taking Carmilla down is learning that she was giving Laura "seduction eyes".
  Laura: How do we stop a vampire?!
  Danny: (on her phone) Staking. Decapitation. Immolation. There's something here about driving an iron needle through her heart. (looks up) You know, normally, I'm not into this kind of stuff, but in the case of "seduction eyes", I could warm up to the thought.
  • Speaking of, that final line from LaFontaine in the prior episode is one of the most quotable moments in the series!
  LaFontaine: Well, yeah, but we know she's a vampire. We've known that since the blood in the milk container, right? [nodding to each of the others] Vampire, vampire, vampire. Yeah?
• When Laura is letting Carmilla seduce her:
  Carmilla: And yet… there's something about you.
  Laura: [nervously] Maybe it's my keen fashion sense.
  (Beat)
  Carmilla: No, it's definitely not that.
  • Moments before that, when Carmilla stops Laura from texting the others.
    Carmilla: Maybe I don't feel like sharing you right now.
    Laura: ...That'd sound more flattering if it didn't make me sound like a canapé.
• While Carmilla is tied up in Laura's bedroom, she explains that her flirting with Laura was actually flirting. Her request for the reporter to just stake her because it would be less mortifying than the conversation they were having is golden.
• Carmilla offhandedly explaining why she can read Sumerian.
  Carmilla: Meh, 1871 was a dull year. I decided to read Gilgamesh.
• The search for mystical weapons yields some... interesting results.
  Carmilla: (...) The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch... would be perfect for an influx of monstrous rabbits.
• LaFontaine blogging as Carmilla.
  So. Hey. This is Carmilla. On Carmilla's twitter account. Totally normal.
  Blah blah blah, existentialism. Blah blah blah, twisted humour. Blah blah blah, sarcasm.
  Did I mention how much I like @LaFilphormes? Smart and funny and totally gets the Silas sitch.
• Laura's puppet show used to illustrate Carmilla's tragic backstory. You will feel like you're going to Hell for laughing, and you shall laugh anyway.
• After battling a swarm of mushrooms created by the Alchemy Club over campus, Laura notes that people hit by the spores tried to burn down the theater building, and wonders what people have against the place. Carmilla's reply?
  Carmilla: Well, nobody likes theater students.
  • Even better is that, immediately after she says it, Laura actually gives a "good point" nod.
• While hiding from a mob in the Christmas Special after Carmilla tried to bite the Mayor of a small town they came across in the mountains (in her defence, Carmilla's patience had worn even thinner than before due to the lack of food from the three week escape from Silas University, and the man was giving a dreadfully long speech^note  which on top of that was about a certain type of vampire which hits Carmilla too close to home), we have a scene where a lady uncannily points out what each girl enjoys the most as a treat. She grimaces when she sees Carmilla enjoys blood sausage — which veers into Hypocritical Humor when we learn the lady was a cannibal who turned her victims into gingerbread. The same gingerbread she'd been feeding the girls, presumably.
  • "Murder her for Christmas! Murder her for Christmas! "
• In one of the Kotex videos, Laura and Carmilla are subbing for Perry and LaFontaine, and Laura explains that the two will be back next video with some topics for finals, such as "Pens or pencils, which stake more effectively?" The half-nervous half-suspicious look on Carmilla's face is hilarious.
  • She honestly looks like she thinks Perry and LaF are going to test the effectiveness on her.
  • Even better! Laura's look once she realizes what she just said!
• Perry's Agent Scully explanation for what Carmilla's deal is:
  Perry: She's not a vampire. There's no such thing as vampires. She's a light-averse octogenarian with an extreme hemoglobin deficiency and really good skin.
• Much, if not all, of the bonus content, with special mention going to the Role Reversal video with Natasha totally hamming the role of innocent, oblivious, entirely-too-tightly-wound Cupcake Laura, as well as Elise mastering the art of seduction eyes. After which you'll want to see the two actors being dorky.
• In the Season 2 premiere, LaFontaine walks into the room while Carmilla and Laura are in the middle of some very close flirting. Carmilla trying to get LaF to leave is funny. LaF's look of fear when the two start getting in each other's space again right in front of them? Hilarious.
  Laura: I'm just going to finish up the video here.
  LaFontaine: "Finish up the video"... Sure.
• Both Carmilla and LaFontaine have less-than-sympathetic reactions to finding out that the entire school newspaper team is dead.
  Perry: They're dead. All dead.
  Carmilla: Well, that doesn't sound promising.
  (later)
  Perry: They were just some kids with the student paper.
  LaFontaine: Not even a very good one.
  • Earlier, when LaFontaine first arrives:
  LaFontaine: Is everyone alright? I heard screaming. The possibly-being-murdered kind, not the fun...
  • Also, Carmilla's "No. Just… No" Reaction when she realizes that Laura is probably going to get them involved in another incredibly dangerous, incredibly stupid plan.
• Whomever is in charge of the subtitles seems to be having fun with their job.
  "SNN":

  Dorky CNN-style news jingle plays

  New jingle happens again, Laura is a dork — Pass it on
  "War and Pieces":

  Laura gestures to an aloof, broody useless lesbian vampire
  "Something Wicked":

  [In a Victorian dandy, computer voice] Always pleased to analyze for a good cause.
  "Arrangements for Living":

  [Super professional/awesome SNN opening theme]
  "Vanishing Act":

  [yelling — about beer, and centrifuges, and longstanding Silas traditions]

  [Mattie emits a very non-human scream. Somewhere between bird of prey and ultrasonic weaponry.]
  "Adonis Interrupted":

  [Kirsch's panicked bro-breathing with excited yelling outside]
  "Enter the Lugenbaron":

  [Super professional SNN signing off music]
  "No Heroics":

  [Super sad, break-up piano music]
  "Old Habits":

  [tense orchestral music... the kind you might hear right before a sword fight]

  [...or a tampon confetti fight]
  "Coup De Grace":

  [Super official SNN pre-debate theme]

  [Danny's totally spontaneous "shut up" cough]

  [The most bad-ass, post-debate, celebratory dub step anyone has ever heard]
  "Damage Control":

  [The song we all know and love plays]

  [Laura runs away like a nerd]
  "Wild Kingdom":

  [more of Tiny Laura's knocks back]
  "Hunger Games":

  [Theo bursts into the room without knocking. Rude.]
  "Bluster and Consequences":

  [Vampires roll out]

  [Minus J.P.]

  [Dirty look]
  "Zones of Friendship":

  [Snarky, tiny gay "I'm so winning rn" laugh]
  "Co-Existence":

  [Semi-stifled useless lesbian laughter]
• Laura and Carmilla kiss, which gets heated enough that Laura ends up taking off her sweater. She proceeds to challenge Carm to race her, and runs off. Carmilla gives the camera an incredibly confused (yet amused) look that is priceless.
  Title Card: Yeah... Carmilla won that race...
• Matska's "official interpretation" of the events on campus.
  • "Campus hazards" becomes "transit inconveniences", based on the logic that a sinkhole filled with lava would, in fact, make transit inconvenient.
  • Something attempting to steal several students' faces was instead "acting out anxieties related to his appearance".
  • An attempt to open a time portal was a "flirtation with an alternative approach to chronology".
  • The dead rising from their graves to haunt the living were merely "enjoying a pleasant day out while making new friends".
  • And a swarm of flying piranha became a "10% chance of precipitation." "There's moisture involved!"
• The entire opening for 2.11, "Adonis Interrupted."
  Carmilla: (upon seeing a bloodied, half-naked Kirsch with antlers on his head) This oughta be good.
  Kirsch: It's the Summer Psychos! For that festival thingy! You know, at first it was cool because there was like, the sexy sponge bath and peeled grapes. And I mean, yeah, I wasn't totally down with the, uh, with the headgear or the part where they blindfolded me and led me into the woods but, you know, D-Bear was going to be into it, right? Except... I kinda hadn't seen her, and by the time they led me into the woods, and took the blindfold off, they had dogs. And arrows! And that Mel chick was all like, "Time to run, Bromeo." And I was like, "This is a weird party, where you dress a dude up like a stag and pretend to hunt him". But you know, I like Capture the Flag. And maybe if I'm lucky, D-Bear will tackle me, right? But instead of D-Bear, it was dogs. Bad dogs! Bitey dogs! And I tried yelling "time out," only there's no time out! Just arrows! Totally real, very sharp arrows. So I scrammed, except, that wasn't easy because they had giant pits full of pointy crap and quicksand and I had to punch a dog... (sad groaning) And when I got back to the campus, I thought it was safe so, I went to grab a brew and chillax... (holds up a beer can with an arrow through it) THEY SHOT MY BEER, MAN. They put an arrow right through it. They're like Terminators. Super-hot, confusing terminators... You gotta hide me!
  • And then when Mel turns up with a bow and arrow, announcing it's time to kill the stag...
  Laura: This isn't The Hunger Games, and Kirsch is not a stag!
  Kirsch: (cowering behind the couch) I CAN TAKE OFF THE ANTLERS IF THAT'S WHAT'S CONFUSING YOU!
  Mel: He's a metaphorical stag.
  Danny: So, what, are you gonna metaphorically kill him?
  Mel: No, that part's literal.
• This exchange, when Laura, Perry, and LaFontaine are discussing how the (admittedly minimal) evidence they have suggests that Mattie is involved with the murders on campus.
  Carmilla: God, is this how you lackwits decided to hogtie me last semester?
  LaFontaine: Pretty much.
  Perry: You did turn out to be a vampire.
  (After a Beat, Carmilla just shrugs and goes back to her book.)
• From Season 2, Episode 13:
  LaFontaine: Come on, Perr, you have to admit, this is pretty cool.
  Perry: You reanimated a dead vampire and stuck a disembodied consciousness into him! What were you thinking?!
  LaFontaine: "Gee, this should be pretty cool."
  • Also, JP's facial expressions as he gets used to having a body again are equal parts adorable and funny.
  • Perry's summation on the whole thing:
  Perry: You can't just--you have to have--there are boundaries--to science--and people's bodies--and common sense--and... When this all goes horribly awry I will be in the kitchen. With the door barricaded. Making cupcakes. (turns on her heel and begins to leave)
  JP: Oh, cupcakes! I recall quite liking cupcakes!
  Perry: THEN MAKE YOUR OWN!
• While the break-up is sad, Laura's wallowing (accompanied by "super sad break-up piano music") is quite hilarious, especially her expression when LaFontaine takes the jacket away from her. And then she takes another enormous bite of ice cream.
  • She's not eating ice cream with a spoon. She's using a pie server.
• In 2.14, JP first hangs in the back of the room, watching the confrontation silently, before speaking up and pointing out that Mattie has no actual power at the moment because there's no student representative on the board. And then he meekly shrinks back again and says, "...Please don't kill me."
• After being starved for information, JP tackles LaFontaine out of frame in order to get blood from them. While Danny and Laura try to get him off of them, take a look at Carmilla and Mattie. They look like they're seriously enjoying the violence shown by their "little brother", almost to a point of pride.
• From 2.27: "They're gonna kill Moby's dick!" Ah, Kirsch...
  • And his sheer delight to have made it into the "friend zone".
• In the otherwise bleak 2.31, we have a few funny moments to lighten the blow.
  • Perry finally comes back — and just like LaFontaine in the first season, doesn't even seem to realize she was missing, having blacked out.
  Perry: So, what I'd miss?
  [Beat. Everyone slowly turns their heads to look at the floor. Perry follows their gazes and sees Mattie's dead body.]
  Perry: OH MY GOD!
  • Kirsch finally catching on that his dead best friend's body has been reanimated.
  LaFontaine: Uh, yeah, funny story—
• "You're the piniest pine that ever pined."
• In Season 2 Episode 33, Jeep has his hands bound for everyone's safety, since blood is limited in the siege. Since he can't use his hands, during a serious conversation he reaches over to a plate on the side and picks up a cookie with his mouth, happily munching as the scene progresses.
• In the Season 0 teaser trailer, Laura is offscreen rummaging around something while Carmilla, on screen, tries to convince her to stop so she doesn't hurt herself. In the middle of Carm's sentence, there's a banging noise and Laura falls into shot and directly into Carmilla. Even funnier is that they take a moment to stare at each other due to the close proximity this causes, after which they awkwardly back away from each other, stammering out vague apologies.
• The mountains of U by Kotex pads and tampons in the "torture room" set of Season 0. Product Placement has NEVER been so overt.
• The fact that previous to Laura coming to Silas, there was a time where all the periods stopped. And the students called it "The Red Wing Migration"
  • Every single phrase they use to describe the disappearing periods.
• Laura's yoga routine includes an upside-down split. It's very... distracting for Carmilla, much to LaFontaine's displeasure.
  • It's very distracting to the Creampuffs too, if the comments are anything to go by...
• Carmilla's Cluster F-Bomb when she, Laura, and LaFontaine discover the Dean's possession of Perry. Considering how much the series has shied away from outright profanity, it's pretty surprising, and hilarious for exactly that reason.
  Natasha wrote that line herself and didn't tell anyone what she was going to curse beforehand. According to the actors, it took quite a few takes for Elise and Kaitlyn to maintain a blank face.
• Laura playing Scrabble with a Death Goddess is pretty hilarious.
• Season 3 outtakes show the scene where the Dean says something (unheard to the audience) that makes Laura spit out her cookie in disgust, except this time with the full audio. Annie Briggs was instructed to say something gross, so what did she choose to go with?
  Annie/The Dean: You know, I gave Lola Perry a venereal disease.
  (Beat, then everyone breaks down)
  • The next take has Annie/The Dean go into vivid detail about this, much to Laura's increasing horror.

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