Brendan Blaber / Funny

Below are general examples relating to Brendan Blaber that don’t fall under any of his other projects. Beware unmarked spoilers.

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Who is the hottest Pokémon Character?

The simple fact that this question derailed a "Dogs In Love" stream enough to be cut out into its own video.
Marissa Lenti immediately answering Leon, explaining her choice shortly after as "He's so stupid". When the conversation properly gets to the Sword/Shield cast, she gets to go into more detail, consisting of statements like "no thoughts, head empty".
Will, on Giovanni: "I’d marry him for the money, then divorce to get half of it."
Marissa's attempt to justify Lance being on her hot list: "he got cape. he boi. he ginger." Brendan immediately counters that Childe from Genshin Impact would also fit that description, and Marissa adamantly denies that Childe is ginger.
The moment they get to Cynthia, there's no need for discussion. Brendan just says "yeah", gives her the thumb's up and no one argues.
Everyone goes wild for both of Grimsley's designs, hooting and hollering in approval.
Marissa: There is no reason that anyone who probably smells like cigarettes should be attractive, but him?! You could scrape him off the side of a wall!
When talking about Clara, Brendan reads out the following comment from chat:
Aloha: YES YES YES DEAR GOD I WANT HER TO DIVORCE ME
Brendan's slow realization that he might have a thing for Silver Foxes, starting with claiming that Kabu, Blaine, and Agatha are all hot within the first few minutes, and ending with the video's description being "Why did I give a thumbs up to all the old people^note, should I read into this?".

Please Play “Metal Wolf Chaos”

"We're the good guys right?" "Yes."
- “IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW MANY PEOPLE I KILL! WHAT MATTERS IS HOW MANY AMERICANS I SAVE! FOR I AM THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!”
“EVERY AMERICAN SHOOTS OUT OF THE WOMB LIKE A BAZOOKA KNOWING HOW TO KILL! NO TUTORIAL IS NEEDED!”
"Finally, a Yandere I enjoy!"

Chef Skyrim

“Oh, I was going for something unassuming, but I absolutely look like I ate your dog.
Jello stays in character, doing the ridiculous insane chef voice, for almost every moment of the video.
“I wish I had Feindal here to keep me warm. He’s not using his skin for anything.”
The game bugs out to a ridiculous degree even though no mods are being used.
The Chef: Those are the rare jitter mooses.
The Chef: That’s not fair, the wolf keeps teleporting onto my head!
Jello deciding to place a cabbage at the scene of his crimes, only to forget to do that almost every time and running back, pursued by guards, to drop one by the corpse.
The Chef: Where did her body go?!

Sky Pirate Girlfriends (Skies of Arcadia: Legends)

When Fina introduces herself, Aika quips that she doesn't like her name and that it will be changed to Antonio. One of the following dialogue options is to call her name strange.
Peter the Deck-Swabber's introduction results in a brief Dark Souls skit, complete with an edited UI over the gameplay.
Vyse gets a Running Gag throughout the playthrough where he's a closeted trans woman (aka an “egg”) who loves women out of a sublimated desire to be one. It morphs from Vyse being a staunch feminist into Vyse being very obviously in the closet about being a transgender woman, and yet never being able to just come out and say it.
- Vyse is initially portrayed as such a feminist that he hypes up women to the point where it’s uncomfortable.
  Aika: Vyse! Over there! Look at the size of that hole!
  Vyse: Oh, the shrine's a woman.
- Early on, Vyse questions how Galcian could be evil if he has "gal" in his name, and later comes to the conclusion that his mom seemingly leaving the stove on was entirely intentional. Aika tries to explain that women aren't faultless, to which Vyse attempts to defend before realizing that he's arguing with a woman.
- The gag is then later expanded to everyone knowing Vyse is in the closet (and being fine with it), yet no one being able to actually get him to open up on the subject, despite repeatedly insisting on it.
  Aika: Vyse, we gotta talk about this!
  Vyse: What's there to talk about, Aika?! (Mirthless Laughter)
- Just before the fight with De Loco, Drachma asks Vyse if he can have one of his potato chips. When Vyse reaffirms that they're buds, Drachma says a lighthearted "hell yeah, sister." Vyse gives a genuine thank you, and the rest of the cast bursts into laughter as Vyrsa's egg starts to crack with "the first admission."
- Every time the flag of the Air Pirates comes up, the transgender flag is superimposed on top of it. Also, Drachma is portrayed as the understanding parent who is waiting for Vyse to finally drop the bombshell.
- The gag is then expanded again to referring to Vyse as "Vyrsa" (as a Punny Name because it's a play of "vice versa," which is itself a reference to the Black Moonstone being able to change one kind of energy into another or "vice versa," which they interpreted as satisfying Vyse's closeted wish), finally coming out of the closet with everyone who still calls Vyrsa by "Vyse" gets punches on a card. After four times of getting the name wrong, Vyrsa gets a free froyo.
  - The above punch-card gag comes about because Arim, who voices Enrique and Gildor, keeps accidentally deadnaming Vyrsa, resulting in both characters filling out their punch-cards.
    Savvy: TWO FREE FROYOS!
  - Eventually, Enrique asks where Vyrsa gets her "Vyrsa Tracker" cards so he can repurpose them for whenever anybody says "butt." When Aika says several "but"s in quick succession, Enrique says she owes him three froyos. When Aika questions if froyos are suddenly becoming a new currency, Vyrsa reveals that "froyo" is actually slang for one hundred million gold.
- Drachma excitedly anticipating Vyrsa coming out to him, only to be disappointed when she tells him something else, instead.
  Drachma: (holding a trans flag and wearing an “I Love My Trans Daughter” t-shirt) Is there anything else you want to tell me??
As a contrast to Vyse/Vyrsa, Galcian is portrayed as being so gay, he ends up circling around to being misogynist, to the point that his love of men and hatred of women is arguably much more prominent than his homosexuality!
- Galcian's flagship being named "The Serpent" is because he named it after "the penis we all share". Except for trans men, "which is totally fine" with Galcian. He eventually morphs into an inverse TERF who's totally fine with transgender men, but is such a He-Man Woman Hater that he treats every woman as an object.
  Galcian: Look, I get it. If you're a trans man? I get it! If I were born female, I would do the same! Join the winning team! [...] The existence of trans men proves that we don't need women!
  - This gag pays off during Galcian's boss fight, where he turns around, massive sword in hand, glares at the newly-decloseted Vyrsa, and sneers that she's "joined the losing team."
- In the raid on Windmill/Pirate Isle, Galcian only has the male characters arrested, since he doesn't acknowledge the women on the island as people.
- Galcian declaring he's under direct orders from Her Royal Highness Empress Teodora. Jello quickly confirms that he'll indeed attempt a coup against her.
- The Valuans' shared call of "Dudes rock" is taken very seriously, as whenever anybody messes it up they are quickly executed with a Tap on the Head.
- After Enrique expresses a desire to live up to the ideals of Old-School Chivalry and treat women like his love interest with respect, he admits that Valua in general doesn't seem to believe in them anymore. The gang bursts out laughing, not even needing to make the joke about why, exactly, respecting and protecting women might be out of fashion in Valua at the moment.
- Despite Galcian's immense misogyny, he fails to figure out that Belleza is a girl rather than a guy with "very impressive pecs" until she says it to him straight out while ramming her vaguely penis-shaped flagship into his escape pod. He also thinks Hatsune Miku is a guy called "Hatsune Mike" because she wears a tie.
Galcian would like to remind you that “we are thousands of feet in the air" as a Running Gag. This culminates in his Terminal attack, in which he teleports high into the air, leaving a trail of explosions in his wake and finishing with a massive blast as he drops onto Gilder.
Whenever a character gets a one-liner or villain speech that falls a little flat, it's revealed that they've actually been working really hard on it for a very long time, and are quite put out that nobody's impressed by it.
Every time a character spins a ship's rudder for dramatic effect, the camera almost immediately cuts to whatever ship they're currently on careening into the nearest structure.
When Savvy says he wishes that Calling Your Attacks sounded better in English, Will suggests that Drachma get an attack called "Drachma Balls". They quickly turn it into a Character Catch Phrase.
When Drachma leaves for the first time, he immediately claims ownership of a house he walks into, followed by throwing its actual owner out the door and onto the road.
Vyse has no idea who the men from the east are, constantly bringing them up and asking if any new factions are the men from the east, despite it being obvious that the men from the east are the Valuans.
Jello uses a save state to skip over Piastol's boss fight, resulting in an accidental Gilligan Cut from Piastol confronting Vyse to her unconscious at Enrique's feet.
Vyse and Gilder make an odd couple, as Vyse takes the latter's question of if women or Daccat's treasure is more important at face value by saying women. When Gilder explains that Daccat's treasure can help them get more women, Vyse is on board.
"Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts, Vyse!"
Some comedy is drawn from the fact that Gilder's attack animation is always shooting the enemy with his pistol, even at point blank.
After a certain point, Valuan soldiers often struggle to say anything audible through their comically oversized helmets. Multiple characters kind of just awkwardly agree with whatever they're saying.
Enrique's... sizeable behind and Painted-On Pants are noted rather often. Apparently, every step he walks emits a clap from his cheeks. And when he pulls two of the Moon Crystals from hammerspace, the group immediately realises the implication they've created...
Jello: Can we wash them first?!
- Even Aika, whom here is interpreted as a lesbian, can't help but appreciate it so much that it starts making him uncomfortable.
- When his mother finally shows up in a big poofy dress, someone jokes that they can see where he gets his "donk" from.
During a scene where Enrique is still recovering from powerful airsickness, Arim is audibly a bit under the weather himself, and keeps flubbing Enrique's lines while trying to react to Enrique's surrogate father, Gregorio, trying to bring him back in.
Enrique: Gregorio is the most honorable that I've ever met. He won't break his word.
Vyse: I understand. You know a lot about breaking words.
Enrique: Look, I'm trying man!
Vyse: I'd pat you on the back but I'm worried I'll miss and my hand will rebound off like a trampoline if I go too far south!
- Cut to Gregorio's flagship, where the admiral tells his subordinates that if the prince has been out sailing they'll probably need to give him at least half an hour to read the note.
Out of a desire to avoid being racist, the people of the East Asian-inspired country of Yafutoma are given southern accents. Later, one of the key items is shown to be named the Maga Sphere. "MAGA" can be short for "Make America Great Again", the slogan for the campaign of former Republican president Donald Trump, resulting in the choice becoming Accidentally-Correct Writing when retrieving the Maga Sphere empowers xenophobic forces within the government to launch a coup, seize power with the aid of foreign actors, and criminalize the main cast for being foreign (and, in their modified form of the story, sexually non-conforming).
Jello: Look, it's not our fault we're preternaturally great at video game improv!
While on Yafutoma, Enrique says they can't attack the representatives of the Empire, or they'll be branded as criminals. However, all of the voice actors note that the party consists almost entirely of pirates, who are criminals by nature.
From pretty early on, everyone decides that Vyse/Vyrsa, Aika, and Fina have "big throuple energy", pairing them up as a One True Threesome and adding romantic undertones to basically every interaction between them in both pairs and as a trio. (Comically, that one's barely even adding romantic undertones; the trio being a One True Threesome was a popular idea long before polyamory became comparatively mainstream.)

Hamtaro Abridged

"Curtains are against my religion!"
"DEAD. DEAD, DEAD, DEAD... Inside."
Pashmina is an eldritch demon. Pretty good so far.
Drunk Boss' mentor is named Drunker Boss, and has died multiple times. He even dies at Pashmina's behest so she can find her brother's whereabouts from a demon. Drunk Boss immediately calls dibs on his blood.
Laura reveals that she sees Hillary as her hero, a seemingly non-hamster-related figure, which Kana finds good. She correctly guesses pre-emptively that Laura is going to do something creepy about her, stating that they're going to stalk her tomorrow. And she hamster anyways, which renders all good of this dead in the water.
Episode 3 takes place in a medieval Japanese setting, but because Oxnard says a line (from the original dub) that would fit better in a Western near the beginning, the episode gets Americanized, including certain words in dialogue being dubbed over with American-sounding terms.

Marathon Reviews

Scooby-Doo Movies:

Pixar Movies:

Cars: (In depressed monotone) Fleshy car tongue… tiny car bugs… car tramp stamp…
- Cars 2: “I WANNA MAKE A SPY MOVIE!” (Deep Russian voice) “No. You make Cars…”
Red’s Dream: Hey, this looks alri-(Sees the clown)-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
- Tin Toy: (Seeing the baby) -AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

Studio Ghibli Movies:

Brendan’s rant against John Lassiter having to introduce every movie.
“On your left, it’s adorable childhood whimsy!” (Awwwww!) “And on your right, it’s children dying for two hours!” (Fire and screaming)

Rankin Bass Specials:

Rudolph says: deviation from the norm will be punished unless it's exploitable.

Which Scooby-Doo character is the best (and why it’s Fred)

Jello's analysis of the Scooby gang's respective talents boils down to thus: Velma is The Smart One, Shaggy is the skill monkey, Daphne has people skills, Scooby is the emotional center, and Fred has a Netflix account.
- During the lead-in to Shaggy's talent during his section, Jello posits what Shaggy brings to the table. Someone off-camera chimes in with "sex appeal", causing Jello to stifle a laugh and decide to Throw It In!.
Towards the end, Brendan gives some brief critique on the occasional "guest" members of the Mystery Gang, like Scrappy-Doo and Flim-Flam. This includes Don Knotts, because of The New Scooby-Doo Movies, who gets nothing more than the following:
*finger snap* "You should watch The Ghost and Mr. Chicken. It's...'s a pretty good movie."

Are You Ready To Buy?

Jello shows his friends some of the most outlandishly extravagant, ridiculously decorated, and most rundown properties on Zillow with the most bored realtor voice imaginable.
The second house the group looks at reminds Jello of the concept of “white torture”.
“This is the flesh wall. It used to pulsate until we put these big wooden staples in the middle of it.”
One of the houses has an “ice woman” who’s been out of work after doing Capri Sun commercials in the 90s.
One of the coolest houses the team looks at is a straight-up "castle house" in Portland, Oregon, complete with towers, medieval furnishings and décor, a courtyard with gardens, outdoor bar kitchen, a circular library with a giant clock on the ceiling, eight bedrooms, among other fabulous amenities. Mostly, they're just happy the paint isn't white.
- Their complaints are mostly about the practicality of the property (which is 13,000 square feet and includes three acres of vineyards) and some of its choices in decoration. In the original stream, Jello flatly states some of the hanging glass lights would shatter if you looked at them wrong.
- Unbeknownst to both Jello and the audience, there's even more to that house than meets the eye: Residents of Portland might recognize it as Blackberry Castle, which was built in 2007 and quickly garnered a nationwide reputation for being unsellable (mostly due to the economics of caring for such a large property). Its only serious prospective buyer prior to 2023 was adult film star Mia Malkova, who intended to convert it into a film studio; she was forced to rescind her offer on the house when she received a job contract in Los Angeles. The house was recently sold for two million dollars (a quarter the initial asking price of eight million), but the buyer is anonymous.
Perhaps the oddest house shown is House 13, simply titled "<redacted>". It starts off strong with a giant, suspiciously grave-sized hole in the middle of one of the rooms and only gets weirder from there, with a bizarre layout, odd fixtures scattered around and, most inexplicably, an entire part of the house painted almost entirely in indigo and green.
In the next house, there is a room where the walls and ceiling are covered entirely in what looks like shag carpeting. The entire cast is flabbergasted and appalled.
Jello: Wh— th— This is the fire-est hazard I have ever seen in my life.
One of the properties shown is straight-up an underground party house complete with ridiculously fake plants that Jello immediately concludes would only be appealing to the ludicrously wealthy.
Jello: Are you Elon Musk, and you want a girl to like you?

Explaining My Hero Academia as Badly as Possible

Izuku getting his quirk from "plot juice".
"With training, Midoriya gains MUSCLES! BIG MACHO! Thanks to incredible mom!"
"Sasuke booms bigtime badly breaking buddy's bones!"
One person tries to make Aoyama and Mineta friends only to be firmly shut down.
"Damn those shadowmin Gumby Nazis!"
"Who can stop their villainous touching?!"
All Might: I won't! [walks off-screen]

The BEST Lemonades

Brendan's colourful metaphors to describe how each lemonade tastes are gold, but particular mention goes to the rose lemonade that, to him, smells like "an aristocratic Frenchman with a piss fetish". Despite this, he gives it a four out of five.
Swoon Pink Lemonade (the one and only zero on his scale of one to five) will never have a home in Brendan's vicinity again.
Brendan: If you took a [whole] lemon and bit into it and the inside was mushroom. Oh god, and then the aftertaste is like rotten orange!
- Jello's confused outrage only worsens when he dumps out the can and sees its murky brown color, which chat calls "unfiltered sewage" and "insect blood". Jello incredulously wonders if Swoon even knows what pink is.
  Jello: (reading chat) "You better hope that you found your bottom." God, I hope so!
- He then says he's going to do Minute Maid lemonade a favor by letting it immediately follow Swoon's concoction.
It takes five different flavours before Brendan finally arrives at a chilling conclusion as to what powdered lemonade mixes taste like.
Brendan: When you get a colonoscopy...you have to drink this substance called Suprep. And it makes you shit everything, it just clears out your body.
[holds up a glass of lemonade while doing a Slasher Smile into the camera]
Brendan: This shit tastes like Suprep!
Brendan: [after providing a glaring deconstruction of what Suprep is like] How hard is it to make fucking lemonade?!
When Brendan shows off the Whole Foods Green Lemonade (a sludgy green drink that looks vaguely like river water), the chat almost unilaterally reacts with disgust and dread, calling it things like "pond scum", "swamp monster", "Shrek snot", "the potion seller's strongest potion" and "the liquid that Ophelia drowned in". Brendan then reads the label and discovers that despite being advertised as a health food it contains no vitamins or minerals, leaving him confused as to who it's meant to be forinvoked.

The WORST Lemonades

The fact that not one, but two lemonades contain CBD oil.
Brendan: That's just fine. [beat] Oh, no it isn't.
The Running Gag of lemonades with generic descriptions begins with Brisk, which describes itself on the label as "juice drink".
Brendan: It's just so generic it sounds like an alien trying to catfish humans with products, like, "Extant drink product! Consume with mouth-face!"
- Later, he comes across possibly the most alien-sounding drink ever conceived:
Brendan: This is my favorite of all. This is "sparkling functional beverage". Yo, this beverage functions. This is a corporeal beverage right here! This beverage does not contain spikes!
At one point, Brendan chugs mustard. Twice. No one is happy about it, least of all his girlfriend.
Yam: (over text) JELLO STOP
Remember Lord Remington? Well, he shows up in person to review several of the more "artisanal" lemonade, and he's just as deliciously hammy as you'd expect a Victorian lemonade baron to be. His relationship with his son, Geoffrey, is so cartoonishly over the top that it Crosses the Line Twice as soon as the latter's introduced.
Geoffrey: Father, what did you think of the lemonade?
Lord Remington: (pours the lemonade down the drain) I regretted the day I sired you.
- While in-character, there is a separate-but-equally-hilarious Running Gag where Brendan keeps accidentally shaking up sparkling lemonades with hilarious results.
Lord Remington: (Corpsing as a Trader Joe’s sparkling lemonade explodes on him) DAMN YOU, TRADER JOE!! You’ve made a mockery of my profession!
Upon finding a lemonade that contains maple syrup, Brendan spends the next minute concocting every joke he can think of regarding how bad of an idea that is, then immediately admits that it smells amazing once he pours it, much to his and the cameraman's amusement. Regrettably, it still tastes awful - so awful that Brendan spits it out all over his face.
"Ingredients: Sparkling filtered water, maple syrup — you have failed.''
Jello referencing comments on the previous stream that poked fun at his colorful descriptions.
"Have you ever drunk gasoline, but only on a Tuesday and only a little? It's great! 4 out of 5!"

Look Ma No Hands

The 5th stream was advertised as a Pokémon Unite stream, only for it to be a Pokemon Uranium stream instead. They then proceed to get more viewers instead of less.
Every time one of the fan-made Pokémon is seen for the first time, everyone on call cracks up at how ugly it is.
Assuming that the game would be an edgy, "darker", Pokémon fangame like most others, they decide to name their trainer "Friend", and all the Pokémon they catch extremely edgelord names.
The running joke of Gnawbone, the first Pokémon they catch, being kept in the party, but in the last slot and refusing to train it, instead abusing its pickup ability to get powerful items earlier than normal. All the while, Gnawbone wildly swings between desperately begging to fight, passive-aggressively hinting that they would like a turn, and finally becoming bitter and jealous of the rest of the team. The real kicker is that Aloha would either jokingly forget they exist, or respond in a way that shows complete disregard for what Gnawbone is trying to say

The Great Ace Attorney

Immediately upon seeing Kazuma, Jello declares that he is absolutely going to play Ryunosuke as "gay for this handsome swordboy."
"Will [who is voicing Kazuma], how many times have we played couples in read-throughs with these exact voices?" "Yeah and I'm pretty consistently the top."

Professor Layton Vs Phoenix Wright

Maya!Brendan:(On Maya, who early on in the game tries to bash Phoenix in the head to test a theory) I’m kinda… what do you call it… a sociopath!

Funny / Brendan Blaber

Disney Movies:

Disney Sequels:

Dreamworks Movies:

Scooby-Doo Movies:

Pixar Movies:

Studio Ghibli Movies:

Rankin Bass Specials:

The BEST Lemonades

The WORST Lemonades

Look Ma No Hands

The Great Ace Attorney

Professor Layton Vs Phoenix Wright

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Funny / Brendan Blaber

Edit Locked

Disney Movies:

Disney Sequels:

Dreamworks Movies:

Scooby-Doo Movies:

Pixar Movies:

Studio Ghibli Movies:

Rankin Bass Specials:

The BEST Lemonades

The WORST Lemonades

Look Ma No Hands

The Great Ace Attorney

Professor Layton Vs Phoenix Wright

Previous

Index

Next