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Common Toilet Jokes

The Food Poisoning Incident

Because food poisoning can make people throw up, or poop: two gross symptoms.

Snot

Expect snot jokes in any Gross-Out Show when someone has a cold, the flu, or any allergy where sneezing is a symptom. Nose-picking, especially if the character eats the snot too, is a common joke.

Yucky superpowers

These may be useless but other times, they might actually be effective or come in useful at very specific times. They include:
  • Vomiting, burping, farting, or pooping something that is not gas, vomit, or poop. The pooping variety might lead to Solid Gold Poop, Pooping Food, or Bowel-Breaking Bricks (if it happens when they're afraid.) Fire is a common one for burping and farting, and if it breathes fire, it's likely to burp fire.
  • Being able to create a bad smell, used to distract people or knock them out. This could be achieved via farting, pooping, bad breath, sweat, or just pheromones.

Accidentally eating/drinking (or nearly eating/drinking) something gross.

Common ways this can happen are:
  • Mistaking something gross for food or drink (pee for lemonade and poop for raisins or chocolate is common, as is mud for chocolate).
  • Having somebody sneak something gross into food or drink (aside from pee, poop, and mud mentioned above, bugs are common for this. The chef might even expect the eater/drinker to like eating/drinking bugs, leading to a misunderstanding). Some people might even replace the food or drink with something gross (for example, replacing spaghetti with worms). A Laxative Prank is similar, where the grossness comes from the character pooping.
  • A character is about to eat/drink something gross, but doesn't because they notice in time that it doesn't look/smell right.

Falling/stepping into something gross

This can happen to villains as karma or to any unfortunate character. Bonus points if somebody laughed at someone for falling or stepping into something gross, only to have the same thing happen to them. Common things to fall/step into include:
  • Dung
  • Mud
  • Trash
  • Fertilizer (which is basically a combination of dung, mud, and trash).
  • Dirty diapers
  • Dog poop
  • Pee (especially when dogs or small children are involved)
  • Skunks (which aren't gross on their own but will inevitably spray the person)

Babies spitting up or messing their diapers

Spitting up often happens when the baby is being burped, and if the baby has a dirty diaper, people will often insult the baby or have over-the-top reactions (fainting or pretending to faint, gagging, throwing up or pretending to throw up, etc) to the smell.

Potty Failure

A character wets or soils themselves. Bring My Brown Pants is when they do it out of surprise/fear and Embarrassing Damp Sheets is when it happens in bed.

Peeing or pooping in the wrong place

Like a Potty Failure, but intentional.

Potty Emergency: somebody really needing the bathroom.

This might lead to:
  • Going in a random place (see above).
  • Having to go to the bathroom at an inopportune time where etiquette is required or there is nowhere to go.
  • The Potty Dance; squirming because they have to use the bathroom. May get them looks or cause them embarrassment.
  • Seeing things that remind them of bathrooms all over the place, such as in other people's conversations, on signs, on TV, in songs, in what other people are doing, and anything having to do with water when somebody needs to pee.
  • Being too shy to actually go.
  • A Disgusting Public Toilet, often at a gas station.
  • A child asking to go to the bathroom while on a trip, and an adult saying something along the lines of, "Why didn't you go before we left?!"
  • Being unable to pay attention.

Puns to do with potty words.

Common words used in such puns are:
  • Any bathroom word with anything that rhymes with it.
  • A Punny Name, see names below.
  • P/pee or pea/pee (such as the sign: "Welcome to the ool. Notice there is no P. We ask that you keep it that way")
  • We/wee, oui/wee or wee as in small with wee as in urine.
  • Poo/Pooh
  • Duty/doodie
  • Do do/doo-doo
  • Shih Tzu/shit
  • Uranus/your anus

Names or nicknames

These include:
  • Embarrassing Initials that spell out bathroom words (such as P.E.E.) are known for being some rude abbreviation (like B.M.), or sound rude compared with other names (such as Anita P.)
  • Names that sound rude together (like Seymour Butz.)
  • An Embarrassing Last Name, like "Butt" or "Wang".
  • A nickname, possibly gained after a gross incident, that uses rhyming or alliteration, like Peeing Patty or Farty Arty.
  • Insults like "poo-poo head" or "pee-pee pants" (generally considered very immature).

Farting/burping

Common fart and burp jokes include:
  • A character who farts and/or burps a lot
  • Alcohol or soda making someone burp.
  • Farts on Fire
  • Beans or sprouts making someone fart.
  • Farting in the bath and making bubbles.
  • Burping the alphabet or words.
  • Making music with farts.
  • Whoopie cushions.
  • Farting in the car.
  • Burping or farting at an awkward place (such as a Fancy Dinner or a meeting).

Fake gross situations

Having something seem gross, but not really be. Examples:
  • It turns out the person was only kidding about gross things being in the food; or a character pretends to eat something gross. Common for The Prankster.
  • A character only thinks they wet/soiled themselves.
  • Something not gross is mistaken for something gross (such as chocolate being mistaken for poop).

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