History Main / TransRelationshipTroubles

Subtrope of TransTribulations, and usually involves a GenderReveal. Can lead to IfItsYouItsOkay. Compare and contrast TransgenderFetishization, which may lead to sexual relations but hardly ever ends in a mutually respectful, loving relationship. See also UnsettlingGenderReveal, when a character is surprised to learn another's gender identity. Contrast SweetOnPollyOliver, when the relationship trouble merely comes from a character being ''disguised'' as an incompatible gender.

If they stay together, the problems continue: trans people's partners may be judged as [[TransgenderFetishization fetishists]] and freaks for being into "that sort of thing" because trans individuals and their bodies are seen as [[TransgenderFetishization inherently sexual]] -- which causes a lot of cis people to be reluctant to date or fall for a trans person, if not actively hostile towards a person once they find out they're trans if they previously hadn't known. In RealLife, this most often gets trans women, especially trans women of color, into seriously dangerous situations.

* Sei in ''Fanfic/{{Metamorphosis}}'' is a lesbian. When the cute girl she kisses is outed as trans, Sei deals with confusion over her attraction.

* [[https://princess-of-the-corner.tumblr.com/ Princess of the Corner]] has written a ''WesternAnimation/MiraculousLadybug'' [[https://princess-of-the-corner.tumblr.com/post/618043101687300096/feel-free-to-ignore-but-what-do-you-think-would rewrite]] where Marinette is a trans boy named Marin and Adrien is a trans girl named Adrienne. Naturally, this trope comes up a few times.
** Compared to canon Chat, Chat Noire is less flirty with Lord Bug because she is unsure if he would accept a trans girl and doesn't want to get her hopes up. This stops when she reveals she's trans to Marin, who as Lordbug lets it slip that he's trans as well.

** One of Vincent's friends, Toby, has the hots for Erica, a server at the Stray Sheep bar they attend. Eventually he manages to score a date and loses his virginity to her [[spoiler:until his friends reveal that she was a former schoolmate named Eric who transitioned. Toby is horrified to learn this, though for the most part, it doesn't seem to strain his relationship with Erica other then some good-humored awkwardness.]]

* ''WesternAnimation/SouthPark'': In "Go God Go", Garrison, at the time having changed into a woman (though save for some breasts and lipstick, looks exactly the same), enters into a relationship with evolutionary biologist Richard Dawkins, whom in the future Cartman travels to is revered as Dawkins' mate. When Eric tries to call back to the past to talk to Garrison, he lets slip of Garrison's sex-change operation. Dawkins is utterly repulsed when he finds out and breaks off the relationship.

If they stay together, the problems continue: trans people's partners may be judged as [[TransgenderFetishization fetishists]] and freaks for being into "that sort of thing" because trans individuals and their bodies are seen as [[AttractiveBentGender inherently sexual]] -- which causes a lot of cis people to be reluctant to date or fall for a trans person, if not actively hostile towards a person once they find out they're trans if they previously hadn't known. In RealLife, this most often gets trans women, especially trans women of color, into seriously dangerous situations.

* ''Series/AllMyChildren'''s lesbian Bianca became involved with the transgender Zarf. As she was still in the "living and dressing as a woman" part of her transition and therefore had yet to have surgery, etc., many viewers denounced the storyline and saw it as the writers wimping out on writing an ''actual'' lesbian romance for Bianca. That said, most of the drama was wrung out of Bianca and society's struggle to see and accept Zarf as a woman.

Coming out to a partner (or potential partner) seems to be a make-it-or-break-it deal in many relationships. Whether the partner accepts their significant other or not varies. A variant on this occurs when someone transitions after they have already settled down. This almost always creates conflict with their partner and often their children if they have any. The issue of whether they should separate or not usually comes up.

* The shoujo manga ''Go! Go! Ichigo!'' stars an elementary schooler with a [[PuppyLove crush]] on her {{Childhood Friend|Romance}} who she was recently reunited with. She's horrified by the fact [[OldFriendNewGender Ichigo is now living as a girl]], and throughout the manga [[ForcedOutOfTheCloset she tries to out her to the class]], but eventually she comes to terms with it all and begins dating Ichigo.

* In the ''WebAnimation/SpookyMonth'' fanfic ''[[https://archiveofourown.org/works/31664492 I love you]]'', Roy is a transgender boy that plans to come out to his friends; incidentally on the same day, Ross plans to ask him to be his girlfriend. Ross gets it out first and Roy breaks down, thinking Ross will just pretend this never happened and continue treating him as a girl, only for Ross to ask Roy to be his ''boy''friend instead, saying he loves him for him, not his gender.

** Compared to canon Chat, Chat Noire is less flirty with Lord Bug because she is unsure if he would accept a trans girl and doesn't want to get her hopes up. This stop when she reveals she's trans to Marin, who as Lordbug lets it slip that he's trans as well.

** [[InSpiteOfANail Like in canon, Nino develops a crush on Marin]], but it's complicated not just because he is [[SecretKeeper one of the few that know Marin is a trans male]] but that he knew Marin before he transitioned. Nino isn't sure if he isn't straight and is worried he is subconsciously denying Marin's gender. Of course the events of ''[[Recap/MiraculousLadybugS01E16Animan Animan]]'' still happens and Nino gets together with Alya, though he does admit to Marin that he isn't straight and he used to have a crush on him.
** In this timeline, Lila is trying to seduce Marin this time, mainly to have him as her MealTicket since he's an aspiring designer with connections to famous stars like Jagged Stone. She also sees herself more worthy of dating Marin than Adrienne because [[PoliticallyIncorrectVillain she sees Adrienne as nothing more than a "fake girl"]]. When Lila does find out that Marin is trans as well, she reacts with disgust... though since Marin already knows she's a liar and [[AnOfferYouCantRefuse she threatened him to date her or she'll turn the class against him]], he's more relieved that his classmates know Lila's vile nature now.

* In ''Series/FreaksAndGeeks'', Seth Rogen's character learns his girlfriend was born intersex and spends time concerned about his sexuality (eventually deciding he's straight because he like rock music and girlie mags).

* ''[[https://www.facebook.com/fakegamercomics/posts/pfbid0Uu89dNKDs7qhthroG3kaC94N1me7x5c7iCtEzpb4mYg4xfUNHdS1csRGNmWRX4fAl Raccoon Hat]]'' is a one-off autobiographical comic by Creator/JamieBarker about a date she went on before coming out as trans that unfortunately resulted in a [[GetBackInTheCloset queerphobia-fueled]] NearRapeExperience. Thankfully Jamie escapes unharmed, calls off the date, moves away and starts living peacefully as a trans woman[[note]]Jamie would later come out as a transfeminine non-binary person[[/note]] afterwards.

* In ''Literature/TheHaremProtagonistWasTurnedIntoAGirlAndDoesntWantToChangeBack'' whilst Vivian and O’tmyil are accepting of Svetlana's alien-tech-powered transition the other harem members take more time, Thisbe as she didn't even consider dating another woman, alien soldier Plynx as she doesn't realise Svetlana had always felt like her old male form didn't match her identity [[spoiler:in fact she's horrified when she learns that humans assign gender at birth because Issiod’rians delay that decision till a person comes of age]] and Augusta due to a mixture of [[HeteronormativeCrusader religious bigotry]] and wanting to get pregnant with Svetlana as the "father" [[spoiler:she finally comes around when she finds out alien tech can solve that issue and allow two women to have children together]].

* One episode of ''Anime/DirtyPair'' deals with the kidnapping of a corporate CEO's kid by the bodyguard the CEO fired - because [[BodyguardCrush they were starting to develop a relationship]], and as a matter of fact the "kidnapping" turns out to be the two of them deciding to run away Romeo and Juliet-style. At the climax, the CEO reveals that the bodyguard is a trans woman in an attempt at making the kid give up, but the kid makes clear [[DefiedTrope he always knew and doesn't give a damn about that]]. In a slight subversion, the revelation was meant as more of a shock to Kei and Yuri who didn't know, but they're also disgusted at the CEO's transphobic attitude (Kei calls his thinking outdated and Yuri points out by their time at least one in every ten people has changed their sex).
-->'''Clicky Goldjeff''': I don't care about her past! Joanca's a woman now, and that's all that matters!

** One of Vincent's friends, Toby, has the hots for Erica, a server at the Stray Sheep bar they attend. Eventually he manages to score a date and loses his virginity to her [[spoiler: until his friends reveal that she was a former schoolmate named Eric who transitioned. Toby is horrified to learn this, though for the most part, it doesn't seem to strain his relationship with Erica other then some good-humored awkwardness.]]
** One of the new endings in [[UpdatedReRelease Full Body]] skips over Toby's reaction and implies that [[spoiler: he and Erica will stay together.]]

* In ''Webcomic/{{Rain|2010}}'', Rain's brother Aiken stays at her and her aunt's place over Christmas because of "relationship troubles" with his fiancee. The issue is later revealed to be that [[spoiler: Jessica, his fiancee, is a stealth trans woman, who was planning on having bottom surgery before they got married. When her insurance backed out, she was forced to come out to him, and he abandoned her.]]

If they stay together, the problems continue: trans people's partners may be judged as [[TransgenderFetishization fetishists]] and freaks for being into "that sort of thing" because trans individuals and their bodies are seen as [[AttractiveBentGender inherently sexual]] - which causes a lot of cis people to be reluctant to date or fall for a trans person, if not actively hostile towards a person once they find out they're trans if they previously hadn't known. In RealLife, this most often gets trans women, especially trans women of color, into seriously dangerous situations.

* An episode of ''Series/LawAndOrderSpecialVictimsUnit'' had a murder investigation discover that the perpetrator was a transwoman who never came out to her boyfriend. When he finds out, he commits suicide.

* On ''[[Series/{{Loving}} The City]]'', gorgeous model Azure C.'s boyfriend absolutely flips out upon learning that she used to be a man, outright telling her that "You make me ''sick''!" and "You're a ''freak''!". She's on the brink of suicide before he talks her out of it. The storyline was nixed due to poor audience reception and the actress' equally poor performance, but they eventually reconciled and happily left town together.

* In ''Webcomic/{{Rain}}'', Rain's brother Aiken stays at her and her aunt's place over Christmas because of "relationship troubles" with his fiancee. The issue is later revealed to be that [[spoiler: Jessica, his fiancee, is a stealth trans woman, who was planning on having bottom surgery before they got married. When her insurance backed out, she was forced to come out to him, and he abandoned her.]]