History Main / LiteralAssKissing

[[quoteright:320:[[SouthPark http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/1101_apology_9591.jpg]]]]

* On ''{{Scrubs}}'', a rich donor to the hospital is admitted as a patient. JD fantasizes that Dr. Kelso comes into the room and lifts up the patient's bedspread to kiss her butt.

* From {{WWE}}: ''VinceMcMahon'' 's "Kiss My Ass" Club, created so Vince could bribe a wrestler that's been doing something he ought not have done. Wrestler would watch Vince arrogantly bend over and reveal to them his buff and beautiful magila. It was forced closed when [[DwayneJohnson The Rock]] made him kiss [[StoutStrength Rikishi Fatu's]] ass. Despite this, Mr. Mcmahon still takes advantage of his power with this club to this date.

* ''SouthPark'':

** Another ''SouthPark'' example: in the episode "Fun with Veal", Cartman refuses to help Stan and Kyle rescue the calves from the veal farm unless Kyle kisses him on the arse. Kyle reluctantly agrees, and Cartman lets off a fart in his face.
* ''FamilyGuy'': Peter is riding a tricycle. Because of Peter's age and size, the tricycle breaks. Peter's mom is later seen putting a band-aid on Peter's bum and kissing it. Peter runs off with glee.

[[folder: Film]]

-->'''Porky:''' Ah b-b-b-b- correction,we're LooneyTunes.

* A crude punk among the gang harassing Jackie and the lady running the market in ''{{Rumble in the Bronx}}'' taunts Jackie by saying if he kisses the punk's ass, he'll let him go, and then bares said ass to him. Jackie and the gang are in a parking garage, and Jackie promptly breaks the antenna off a car and uses it to ''whip'' the punk's bare ass instead.

[[folder: Literature]]

[[folder: Music]]
* The titular ass-breath from The Coup's song "Ass Breath Killers" is a breath condition that one gets from kissing too much ass.

* From {{WWE}}: ''VinceMcMahon'' 's "Kiss My Ass" Club, created so Vince could bribe a wrestler that's been doing something he ought not have done. Wrestler would watch Vince arrogantly bend over and reveal to them his buff and beautiful magila. It was forced closed when [[DwayneJohnson The Rock]] made him kiss [[StoutStrength Rikishi Fatu]]'s ass. Despite this, Mr. Mcmahon still takes advantage of his power with this club to this date.

[[folder: Theatre]]
* Clive Barker's play ''TheHistoryOfTheDevil''. The Devil makes it a point to ask several characters, although very politely.

[[folder: WesternAnimation]]

[[folder: Other]]

* From {{WWE}}: [[VinceMcMahon]]'s "Kiss My Ass" Club, created so Vince could bribe a wrestler that's been doing something he ought not have done. Wrestler would watch Vince arrogantly bend over and reveal to them his buff and beautiful magila. It was forced closed when [[DwayneJohnson The Rock]] made him kiss [[StoutStrength Rikishi Fatu]]'s ass. Despite this, Mr. Mcmahon still takes advantage of his power with this club to this date.

* From {{WWE}}: [[Vince McMahon]]'s "Kiss My Ass" Club, created so Vince could bribe a wrestler that's been doing something he ought not have done. Wrestler would watch Vince arrogantly bend over and reveal to them his buff and beautiful magila. It was forced closed when [[DwayneJohnson The Rock]] made him kiss [[StoutStrength Rikishi Fatu]]'s ass. Despite this, Mr. Mcmahon still takes advantage of his power with this club to this date.

* ''Family Guy'': Peter is riding a tricycle. Because of Peter's age and size, the tricycle breaks. Peter's mom is later seen putting a band-aid on Peter's bum and kissing it. Peter runs off with glee.

* From {{WWE}}: Vince McMahon's "Kiss My Ass" Club, created so Vince could bribe a wrestler that's been doing something he ought not have done. Wrestler would watch Vince arrogantly bend over and reveal to them his buff and beautiful magila. It was forced closed when [[DwayneJohnson The Rock]] made him kiss [[StoutStrength Rikishi Fatu]]'s ass. Despite this, Mr. Mcmahon still takes advantage of his power with this club to this date.

* From {{WWE}}: VinceMcMahon's "Kiss My Ass" Club. It was forced closed when [[DwayneJohnson The Rock]] made him kiss [[StoutStrength Rikishi Fatu]]'s ass.

* In the story where ''TheSimpsons'' go to Ireland, Bart tricks people into kissing his bottom (which has been spraypainted) instead of the Blarney Stone, although this trick backfired when an Irish version of Nelson decides to carve his initials in the "rock."

* There are plenty of comics whose punch line is "Come on, {{Pinocchio}}, tell me a huge lie."

* The 2000 film version of ''HowTheGrinchStoleChristmas''.

* A crude punk among the gang harassing Jackie and the lady running the market in ''Rumble in the Bronx'' taunts Jackie by saying if he kisses the punk's ass, he'll let him go, and then bares said ass to him. Jackie and the gang are in a parking garage, and Jackie promptly breaks the antenna off a car and uses it to ''whip'' the punk's bare ass instead.

* From {{WWE}}: Vince [=McMahon=]'s "Kiss My Ass" Club. It was forced closed when [[DwayneJohnson The Rock]] made him kiss [[StoutStrength Rikishi Fatu]]'s ass.

* Used as a combined joke, CMOA, and NightmareFuel in ''[[ModernTalesOfFaerie Tithe]]'' by Holly Black: after finding out a villain's TrueName, the main character sarcastically tells him to kiss her ass, and doesn't realize he's magically compelled to obey. "That is the true nature of servitude . . . Not at all pretty. In the future, I suggest you be less inventive with your insults."
* Thanks to the LiteralGenie nature of the magic bean in ''TheTenthKingdom'', this trope is the result when ButtMonkey ([[{{Pun}} ha-ha!]]) Tony Lewis wishes for his boss "and his entire family to ''kiss my ass'' and be my slaves forever". It doesn't help that at least one of the Murrays must have been something of a brown-noser already, since he insists on kissing Tony's ass repeatedly. (Or could that also have been covered under the "forever" part?)
* A crude punk among the gang harassing Jackie and the lady running the market in ''Rumble in the Bronx'' taunts Jackie by saying if he kisses the punk's ass, he'll let him go, and then bares said ass to him. Jackie and the gang are in a parking garage, and Jackie promptly breaks the antenna off a car and uses it to ''whip'' the punk's bare ass instead.

* ''Bachelor Party'' featured an accidental double ass-kiss, which was a [[{{Squick}} Crowning Moment of Squick]].
* Clive Barker's play ''TheHistoryOfTheDevil''. The Devil makes it a point to ask several characters, although very politely.

* In ''SouthPark'', when Randy Marsh accidentally says [[NWordPrivileges the N word]] on TV, he apologizes to Jesse Jackson by kissing his ass on camera. This also turns the episode title "With Apologies to Jesse Jackson" into a DoubleEntendre.
** Another ''SouthPark'' example: in the episode "Fun with Veal", Cartman refuses to help Stan and Kyle rescue the calves from the veal farm unless Kyle kisses him on the arse. Kyle reluctantly agrees, and Cartman lets off a fart in his face.

* A TakeThat gag in ''Film/SpaceJam'':
-->'''Porky:''' Ah b-b-b-b- correction,we're LooneyTunes.
-->'''Daffy:''' And as such, property of Warner Brothers Inc.! -lifts up WB-emblazoned behind and kisses it- MMMMMWAH!
* From {{WWE}}: Vince [=McMahon=]'s "Kiss My Ass" Club. It was forced closed when [[DwayneJohnson The Rock]] made him kiss [[StoutStrength Rikishi Fatu]]'s ass.
* Used as a combined joke, CMOA, and NightmareFuel in ''[[ModernTalesOfFaerie Tithe]]'' by Holly Black: after finding out a villain's TrueName, the main character sarcastically tells him to kiss her ass, and doesn't realize he's magically compelled to obey. "That is the true nature of servitude . . . Not at all pretty. In the future, I suggest you be less inventive with your insults."

* The 2000 film version of ''HowTheGrinchStoleChristmas''.

* In ''{{Shrek}}'', the dragon is about to kiss Donkey when Shrek drops in to save him, and she ends up kissing Shrek's exposed hindquarters instead. She is not too pleased.
** [[StealthPun Either way, she'd have kissed an ass.]]

--Geoffrey Chaucer "[[Literature/CanterburyTales Millers Tale]]" (see below for translation).

* OlderThanPrint: "The Millers Tale" in ''Literature/CanterburyTales'', which might also be the first ever literary reference to "open your mouth and close your eyes..."

--Geoffrey Chaucer "[[CanterburyTales Millers Tale]]" (see below for translation).

* OlderThanPrint: "The Millers Tale" in ''CanterburyTales'', which might also be the first ever literary reference to "open your mouth and close your eyes..."

* A TakeThat gag in ''SpaceJam'':

--Geoffrey Chaucer "[[CanterburyTales Millers Tale]]", making this OlderThanPrint (see below for translation).

*** Subverted later in the same story, when Absalom gets a red hot poker and returns to the window. When he calls for his kiss again, the lady's lover sticks his ass out the window to pull the same prank. [[ToastedBuns *Sizzle* ]]
* James Joyce's ''{{Ulysses}}'', Leopold Bloom has a habit of kissing his wife's bottom as a greeting.

* OlderThanPrint: "The Millers Tale" in ''CanterburyTales''

*** Subverted later in the same story, when Absalom gets a red hot poker and returns to the window. When he calls for his kiss again, the lady's lover sticks his ass out the window to pull the same prank. [[AssShove * Sizzle* ]]

** English translation:

* From {{WWE}}: Vince [=McMahon=]'s "Kiss My Ass" Club.

* In ''SouthPark'', when Randy Marsh accidentally says [[NWordPrivileges the N word]] on TV, he apologizes to Jesse Jackson by kissing his ass on camera.

** [[YaoiFangirl LINKSLINKSLINKSLINKS!!]]

* In an episode of ''HomeImprovement'', Tim Taylor once responded to Al's attitude to their company's new president with "Why don't you just glue your lips to his butt?"

*** Subverted later in the same story, when Absalom gets a red hot poker and returns to the window. When he calls for his kiss again, the lady's lover sticks his ass out the window to pull the same prank. [[AssShove * Sizzle* ]]

*** Subverted later in the same story, when Absalom gets a red hot poker and returns to the window. When he calls for his kiss again, the lady's lover sticks his ass out the window to pull the same prank. *Sizzle*