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'''Lex:''' ''[smiles]''Because we needed someone who could convincingly play [[IdiotHero the role]] [[DumbIsGood of superhero]].\\
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'''Lex:''' ''[smiles]''Because ''[smiles]'' Because we needed someone who could convincingly play [[IdiotHero the role]] [[DumbIsGood of superhero]].\\
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'''Lex:''' ''[smiles]''Because we needed someone who could convincingly play [[IdiotHero the role]] [[DumbIsGood of superhero]].
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'''Lex:''' ''[smiles]''Because we needed someone who could convincingly play [[IdiotHero the role]] [[DumbIsGood of superhero]].\\
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* The Renegade asks the Light why they made Guardian the way he is.
--> '''Renegade:''' Look, I have to ask: your people programmed James Harper's brain. Why is he such a vacuous fool?\\
'''Lex:''' ''[smiles]''Because we needed someone who could convincingly play [[IdiotHero the role]] [[DumbIsGood of superhero]].
'''Renegade:''' ''[grins]'' Makes sense.
--> '''Renegade:''' Look, I have to ask: your people programmed James Harper's brain. Why is he such a vacuous fool?\\
'''Lex:''' ''[smiles]''Because we needed someone who could convincingly play [[IdiotHero the role]] [[DumbIsGood of superhero]].
'''Renegade:''' ''[grins]'' Makes sense.
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* When Peter Wynne offers to check and make sure Terry's semen wasn't affected by his brief time spliced with bat DNA, Bruce says he'll get it checked.
--> '''Bruce:''' It's not a complicated test. I'll give you a cup when we get back to the cave.\\
'''Terry:''' How's a cup gunna test-? ''[Mr. Wayne glowers at him]'' ''Oh''. I shoulda stayed a ''bat''.
--> '''Bruce:''' It's not a complicated test. I'll give you a cup when we get back to the cave.\\
'''Terry:''' How's a cup gunna test-? ''[Mr. Wayne glowers at him]'' ''Oh''. I shoulda stayed a ''bat''.
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* When Superman says he needs the advice of both Green Arrow and Orange Lantern, Paul makes a construct halo and wings for Ollie and a trident and horns for himself. Superman is simply amused at the sight.
--> '''Superman:''' I wouldn't be so hard on yourself. But you do certainly have a ''unique'' perspective.
** When Ollie asks why Superman wants his opinion of all people, the latter responds that Ollie is the most normal guy on the Justice League.
--> '''Superman:''' I wouldn't be so hard on yourself. But you do certainly have a ''unique'' perspective.
** When Ollie asks why Superman wants his opinion of all people, the latter responds that Ollie is the most normal guy on the Justice League.
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* In order to camouflage Superboy for a mission, Miss Martian is forced to basically vore him.
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* When the Riddler learns that Paul promised to killed Sportsmaster if he ever saw the man again and asks why he would do that, Paul simply says that he's Sportsmaster's [[ArchEnemy nemesis]]. When Sportsmaster disagrees, Paul gives a detailed explanation as for why this is the case.
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* When the Riddler learns that Paul promised to killed kill Sportsmaster if he ever saw the man again and asks why he would do that, Paul simply says that he's Sportsmaster's [[ArchEnemy nemesis]]. When Sportsmaster disagrees, Paul gives a detailed explanation as for why this is the case.
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[[/folder]]
[[folder:2013]]
[[folder:2013]]
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[[/folder]]
[[folder:2013]]
[[folder:2013]]
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* In order to get support for one of his projects, Paol must help a man eat his own head.
--> I envelop his head in an orange glow. If I remove it piece by piece and replace it with a copy… I'll have to fake doing that to his brain, obviously, but that should be well within my abilities.\\
"Would your highness like a mirror?" I numb his nerves and then detach a portion of his neck while using constructs to maintain blood and air flow. "You may find this educational to watch."\\
He grins even ''more'' broadly, before pointing at a flunky as I slot the removed portion of his neck into a construct head mould.\\
"MIRROR!"
--> I envelop his head in an orange glow. If I remove it piece by piece and replace it with a copy… I'll have to fake doing that to his brain, obviously, but that should be well within my abilities.\\
"Would your highness like a mirror?" I numb his nerves and then detach a portion of his neck while using constructs to maintain blood and air flow. "You may find this educational to watch."\\
He grins even ''more'' broadly, before pointing at a flunky as I slot the removed portion of his neck into a construct head mould.\\
"MIRROR!"
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* Paul gives Kon the short version of Kahndaq's creation myth.
--> "It was wanked into existence."\\
He blinks, mildly stunned. "[[FlatWhat What?]]"\\
"It's a fairly self-explanatory description. Ra 'took himself in hand', caught his own semen, took it into his mouth and then-"\\
Kon gurns in disgust. "Aw."\\
"-he spat it out." I smile. "It was funny, because when I was in secondary school, we read about creation myths in English. But the sheet we got on Kahndaq didn't actually have the creation myth on it. I wondered why at the time, and it wasn't for years that I heard what the actual myth was."
--> "It was wanked into existence."\\
He blinks, mildly stunned. "[[FlatWhat What?]]"\\
"It's a fairly self-explanatory description. Ra 'took himself in hand', caught his own semen, took it into his mouth and then-"\\
Kon gurns in disgust. "Aw."\\
"-he spat it out." I smile. "It was funny, because when I was in secondary school, we read about creation myths in English. But the sheet we got on Kahndaq didn't actually have the creation myth on it. I wondered why at the time, and it wasn't for years that I heard what the actual myth was."
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* Paol's first assumption upon seeing Grand Countess Emmanuelle von Liebwitz was that she was a prostitute. This is due to her {{Stripperific}} outfit.
--> Seriously? Someone as rich as her should be able to pay someone to attach a drawstring to her skirt. Or advise her that a woman her age shouldn’t show that much upper thigh in public. But I float in front of the railing she's leaning against and bow politely.
--> Seriously? Someone as rich as her should be able to pay someone to attach a drawstring to her skirt. Or advise her that a woman her age shouldn’t show that much upper thigh in public. But I float in front of the railing she's leaning against and bow politely.
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* Once Paul meets Sekhmet, the latter immediately attacks him because she's insulted about the time he [[CallBack jokingly suggested that she get together with Athena]].
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* Kon and Paul talk about the possibility of a cat goddess becoming more popular, and thus more powerful, due to the appeal of {{Cat Girl}}s in Japanese media.
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Rated M For Manly is about works, not characters
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** A later chapter mentions that Captain Marvel/Billy recently had a birthday, and [[RatedMForManly Guy]] wanted to plan the party, but Paul managed to catch him in time and explained that Marvel was actually turning ''11'', and that Guy's idea of a party for the guy really wasn't appropriate.
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** A later chapter mentions that Captain Marvel/Billy recently had a birthday, and [[RatedMForManly Guy]] Guy wanted to plan the party, but Paul managed to catch him in time and explained that Marvel was actually turning ''11'', and that Guy's idea of a party for the guy really wasn't appropriate.
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* Red Lantern Paul and Komand'r visit Zamaron as they're interested in having their wedding there. One of the Zamarons reacts rather intensely when the Guardians are mentioned. When RL!Paul asks if she had a bad break up, she [[SuddenlyShouting suddenly screams]] [[BlatantLies that she's fine]]. One of the other Zamarons nonverbally tells RL! Paul not to ask more.
to:
* Red Lantern Paul and Komand'r visit Zamaron as they're interested in having their wedding there. One of the Zamarons reacts rather intensely when the Guardians are mentioned. When RL!Paul asks if she had a bad break up, she [[SuddenlyShouting suddenly screams]] [[BlatantLies that she's fine]]. One of the other Zamarons nonverbally tells RL! Paul RL!Paul not to ask more.
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Changed line(s) 571,572 (click to see context) from:
** Which of course makes it even funnier when they meet for the first time since Komand'r became pregnant... and due to the hormones messing with her, is now just as excuberant and joyful as her sister. Cue the two sisters {{squee}}ing as they meet mid-air.
---> '''Cyborg:''' Oh great, now there's two of 'em.
---> '''Cyborg:''' Oh great, now there's two of 'em.
to:
** Which of course makes it even funnier when they meet for the first time since Komand'r became pregnant... and due to the hormones messing with her, is now just as excuberant and joyful as her sister. Cue the two sisters {{squee}}ing as they meet hug mid-air.
--->'''Cyborg:''' Oh great, now '''Raven:''' Now there's two of 'em.them. G''reat''.
--->
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* When Kid Flash gets Canis so that they can go out on an assignment, he notices that Canis seems unusually happy and sweaty. He briefly thinks on why this is before forcing himself to think of something else.
--> Did I just [[CaughtWithYourPantsDown catch him j-]]? No. Not thinking it. Not thinking it.
--> Did I just [[CaughtWithYourPantsDown catch him j-]]? No. Not thinking it. Not thinking it.
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* When Paul learns that the name of the Forever People's vehicle is The Whiz Wagon, he internally decides to keep calling it the name he made up for it: The Forevercar.
* Paul explains to his companions that the Lantern from Qualar IV is completely insane.
--> '''Bear:''' Would a world of cowards call a brave man insane?\\
'''Paul:''' Yes, but I mean, the reason why he doesn't faint is because he hallucinates that there's no threat to him. He once beat a war fleet while firmly believing that the ships were some sort of biting fly.
* Paul explains to his companions that the Lantern from Qualar IV is completely insane.
--> '''Bear:''' Would a world of cowards call a brave man insane?\\
'''Paul:''' Yes, but I mean, the reason why he doesn't faint is because he hallucinates that there's no threat to him. He once beat a war fleet while firmly believing that the ships were some sort of biting fly.
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* Lantern B'dg's looking up Paul's file on the Green Lantern database leads to some humorous comments on what exactly was written about him.
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* Lantern B'dg's B'dg looking up Paul's file on the Green Lantern database leads to some humorous comments on what exactly was written about him.
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* The Renegade makes Guy uncomfortable when he reveals that plenty of people have drawn pictures of himself and Princess Luna, enough to cause Guy to use a construct hand to [[TooMuchInformation stop the Renegade from saying more on the subject]].
to:
* The Renegade makes Guy uncomfortable when he reveals that plenty of people have [[RuleThirtyFour drawn pictures of himself and Princess Luna, Luna]], enough to cause Guy to use a construct hand to [[TooMuchInformation stop the Renegade from saying more on the subject]].
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* Lantern B'dg's looking up Paul's file on the Green Lantern database leads to some humorous comments on what exactly was written about him.
--> '''B'dg:''' Why is there a note on your file telling me to avoid thinking about anything that you do?\\
'''Paul:''' Because my actions tend to be strange and I have little regard for the mental equanimity of the people around me.
--> '''B'dg:''' Why is there a note on your file telling me to avoid thinking about anything that you do?\\
'''Paul:''' Because my actions tend to be strange and I have little regard for the mental equanimity of the people around me.
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Changed line(s) 669 (click to see context) from:
* While looking for Uncle Sam, Paul enlists the aid of the embodiment of America Freedom, which takes on the form of a talking eagle. Paul's interactions with the eagle are humorous for multiple reasons.
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* While looking for Uncle Sam, Paul enlists the aid of the embodiment of America American Freedom, which takes on the form of a talking eagle. Paul's interactions with the eagle are humorous for multiple reasons.
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* In order to test out his 'sense of humor' program, Mister Atom contacts Robin and asks if the latter would like to talk about the benefits of Batman improving his time management by improving how he mates with Batwoman, to Robin's horror.
--> '''Mister Atom:''' Batwoman is already working on him.\\
'''Robin:''' Oh, ''[[ParentalSexualitySquick ew]]''. I don’t need to know-.\\
'''Mister Atom:''' Not sexually. Most humans respond well to the physical presence of people they trust. Simply by being close to him, Batwoman is making it easier for him to get rest.\\
'''Robin:''' Oh.\\
'''Mister Atom:''' Though you make a good point. I will raise the issue of their mating behavior with her later. I do not have a good understanding of the psychological effects of human mating. In fact, it may be best if we discuss Batman management as a group.\\
'''Robin:''' (''internally'') No. ''No.''\\
'''Mister Atom:''' When can you return to the Batcave?\\
'''Robin:''' (''internally'') '''Double'''-no. (''outloud'') Whenever you're planning on having that talk?\\
'''Mister Atom:''' Good. I-.\\
'''Robin:''' ''After'' that.\\
'''Mister Atom:''' That is awkward. If you are not present, the resulting plan may require your absence from particular rooms or buildings at times not convenient to you.\\
'''Robin:''' I'll cope.
--> '''Mister Atom:''' Batwoman is already working on him.\\
'''Robin:''' Oh, ''[[ParentalSexualitySquick ew]]''. I don’t need to know-.\\
'''Mister Atom:''' Not sexually. Most humans respond well to the physical presence of people they trust. Simply by being close to him, Batwoman is making it easier for him to get rest.\\
'''Robin:''' Oh.\\
'''Mister Atom:''' Though you make a good point. I will raise the issue of their mating behavior with her later. I do not have a good understanding of the psychological effects of human mating. In fact, it may be best if we discuss Batman management as a group.\\
'''Robin:''' (''internally'') No. ''No.''\\
'''Mister Atom:''' When can you return to the Batcave?\\
'''Robin:''' (''internally'') '''Double'''-no. (''outloud'') Whenever you're planning on having that talk?\\
'''Mister Atom:''' Good. I-.\\
'''Robin:''' ''After'' that.\\
'''Mister Atom:''' That is awkward. If you are not present, the resulting plan may require your absence from particular rooms or buildings at times not convenient to you.\\
'''Robin:''' I'll cope.
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** It's later revealed that they decided on Ultraboy's idea: an award ceremony.
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* When affected by the red light, Jade reveals that one of the things that makes her mad is how Paul [[RunningGag always tries to talk his way out of problems even when it seems inappropriate]]. Paul's response to continue doing so in order to help Jade.
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Changed line(s) 574 (click to see context) from:
* Red Lantern Paul and Komand'r visit Zamaron as they're interested in having their wedding there. One of the Zamarons reacts rather intensely when the Guardians are mentioned. When RL!Paul asks if she had a bad break up, she suddenly screams that she's fine. One of the other Zamarons nonverbally tells RL! Paul not to ask more.
to:
* Red Lantern Paul and Komand'r visit Zamaron as they're interested in having their wedding there. One of the Zamarons reacts rather intensely when the Guardians are mentioned. When RL!Paul asks if she had a bad break up, she [[SuddenlyShouting suddenly screams screams]] [[BlatantLies that she's fine.fine]]. One of the other Zamarons nonverbally tells RL! Paul not to ask more.
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* Paul gives an orange ring to Ghia'ta, who usually wears a violet ring. She is uncomfortable using it and points out that Paul would struggle with a violet ring just as much as she does with orange. She doesn't even manage to finish speaking, and Paul is already asking for her ring.
-->'''Ghia'ta''': You intend to use it?\\
'''Paul''': Don’t know. I haven't ever tried using another colour ring before. [...]\\
'''Ghia'ta''': You haven't tried a green ring?\\
'''Paul''': No. I asked Guy once and he looked at me as if I'd asked to borrow his testicles. Offered him my ring in return and he jerked his hand back.
* While different versions of Paul ended up in different fictional realities, each of them lost the memory of the particular world they ended up in. They do, however, remember the ''other's'' worlds, which leads to some funny moments when several different Pauls meet.
** Red Lantern Paul is disturbed to realize that his universe is a [[WesternAnimation/TeenTitans2003 cartoon for kids]].
--->'''Red''': Wait, what was the target age group?\\
'''Indigo''': Early teens.\\
'''Red''': I- Really? I've been... ripping people's skulls out! That... can't be okay.
** When Indigo Lantern Paul sympathizes with Red Lantern's struggles, Red bluntly reminds him that Indigo himself is stuck in a CrapsackWorld.
--->'''Indigo''': You said that you know my Earth? What's it from?\\
'''Red''': A Garth Ennis comic called 'The Boys'.\\
'''Indigo''': ''They're'' the main characters? A CIA black operations squad?\\
'''Red''': A '''Garth Ennis''' comic called 'The Boys'.\\
'''Indigo''': Ah. Yes, that... Would explain a few things.
-->'''Ghia'ta''': You intend to use it?\\
'''Paul''': Don’t know. I haven't ever tried using another colour ring before. [...]\\
'''Ghia'ta''': You haven't tried a green ring?\\
'''Paul''': No. I asked Guy once and he looked at me as if I'd asked to borrow his testicles. Offered him my ring in return and he jerked his hand back.
* While different versions of Paul ended up in different fictional realities, each of them lost the memory of the particular world they ended up in. They do, however, remember the ''other's'' worlds, which leads to some funny moments when several different Pauls meet.
** Red Lantern Paul is disturbed to realize that his universe is a [[WesternAnimation/TeenTitans2003 cartoon for kids]].
--->'''Red''': Wait, what was the target age group?\\
'''Indigo''': Early teens.\\
'''Red''': I- Really? I've been... ripping people's skulls out! That... can't be okay.
** When Indigo Lantern Paul sympathizes with Red Lantern's struggles, Red bluntly reminds him that Indigo himself is stuck in a CrapsackWorld.
--->'''Indigo''': You said that you know my Earth? What's it from?\\
'''Red''': A Garth Ennis comic called 'The Boys'.\\
'''Indigo''': ''They're'' the main characters? A CIA black operations squad?\\
'''Red''': A '''Garth Ennis''' comic called 'The Boys'.\\
'''Indigo''': Ah. Yes, that... Would explain a few things.
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* After proposing to Rogue, X-Man!OL goes on to blow the minds of Kurt Wagner, Magneto, Havok, and Polaris by [[InternalReveal revealing to them the existence of their previously unknown family members]].
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* After proposing to Rogue, X-Man!OL goes on to blow the minds of Kurt Wagner, Magneto, Havok, Polaris, Quicksilver and Polaris Scarlet Witch by [[InternalReveal revealing to them the existence of their previously unknown family members]].
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* While the other members of the Young Offenders say they have no idea on how to prevent infighting among the Syndicate as a whole, Mary Mayhem has a ''very'' simple one.
--> "Why not let them fight it out, and kill the survivors we don’t like?" Mary smiles as the rest stare. "What? That's more than ''you'' idiots managed."
--> "Why not let them fight it out, and kill the survivors we don’t like?" Mary smiles as the rest stare. "What? That's more than ''you'' idiots managed."
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* The Renegade makes Guy uncomfortable when he reveals that plenty of people have drawn pictures of himself and Princess Luna, enough to cause Guy to use a construct hand to [[TooMuchInformation stop the Renegade from saying more on the subject]].
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Changed line(s) 677 (click to see context) from:
The great yellow demon could arrive at any moment, and the Illustres isn't here. I don't know what could have delayed him-.\\
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--> The great yellow demon could arrive at any moment, and the Illustres isn't here. I don't know what could have delayed him-.\\
