We will fight for bovine freedom...
Cows with Guns is a folk song performed by Dana Lyons in 1996, which is perhaps best known for being featured in the Flash short film adaptation made in 2003 by Bjørn-Magne Stuestøl. The song and film tell the tale of a white anthropomorphic cow called "The Great Cow Guru" who warns the other cows of their fate and convinces them to help him start a war against humans.
Examples:
- Added Alliterative Appeal: The film ends with "chickens in choppers".
- Animal Gender-Bender: The Great Cow Guru is called a "he" by the singer, yet has an udder.
- The Cavalry: Chickens in Choppers.
- Constantly Lactating Cow: The Great Cow Guru is able to produce milk all year round.
- Lactating Male: The Great Cow Guru is referred to as a "he" by the lyrics, yet squirts milk out of its udder at one point.
- Anthropomorphic Zigzag: The cows switch between walking on all fours and walking on their hind legs.
- Happiness in Slavery: Subverted. When the Great Cow Guru speaks about justice, the other cows ignore him and go back to eating grass. But then when he warns them of their impending doom, they are suddenly interested.
- Pun: "So they all gathered 'round, 'cause the steaks were so high. BAD COW PUN!"
- Stock Animal Diet: The cows all eat grass.
- Translation Convention: "He mooed 'We must fight, escape or we'll die...'"
