Web Video / The Seven Deadly Schmucks

Meliodas: I swear, if I ever run into any of those other six schmucks again, just... take the nearest blunt object and beat me to death with it.

The Seven Deadly Schmucks is The Abridged Series for The Seven Deadly Sins. Fifteen episodes and three minisodes have been released so far. The plot remains roughly the same, although the cast has been retooled into a bunch of Heroic Comedic Sociopaths who mostly hate each other and rather than trying to actively overthrow the Holy Knights, they just sort of accidentally blunder into heroism when their various personality defects accidentally fix things.

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GIRL GUY GIANT IMMORTAL FAIRY {OMINOUS NOISE} PIIIIG GO!:

• Adaptation Name Change:
  • Taizoo in the Vaizel Tournament Arc is renamed Muscle Man Joe.
  • Every single one in the Dawn Roar team is changed to Skeeter, Cletus, Jessie, Boy Jessie and Barfalamule. Even their team name is changed to "The Skeeter Brothers". And yes, even Jessie is referred to as a brother.
• The Alcoholic: Both Meliodas and Ban, although Ban is much more exaggerated. He drinks the entire stock of Boar Hat's beer, which amounts to two years worth, in one sitting.
• Adaptation Relationship Overhaul: In the anime, Griamore and Veronica have several moments of Ship Tease. Here, it's revealed they're engaged.
• Adaptational Dumbass: Played with for Hendrickson. Normally, he's the Only Sane Man of the Knights of Liones stuck dealing with the antics of others like Dreyfus and Gilthunder. Once he uses the power of Red Demon blood though, he undergoes Sanity Slippage and begins acting more impulsive and immature, reveling in both his new power and "winging it" style. Exaggerated once he drinks the blood of the Gray Demon though, his intelligence drops to the negative, regularly babbling things that Makes Just as Much Sense in Context despite having the power to decimate the rest of Liones on his own. Gilthunder even laments that they aren't going to meet their end at the hands of normal Hendrickson, but at the hands of a bumbling moron who has no idea what's even going on.
• Adaptational Heroism: Hendrickson seems to be more noble than anime!Hendrickson. He's appalled when Gilthunder, in an act of stupidity, slaughters an entire tribe from Germania and when he learns that Dreyfus had planned the whole thing.
• Adaptational Jerkass: Meliodas, who was originally portrayed as a kindhearted pervert, is now foul-mouthed, rude and aggressive.
• Adaptational Villainy:
  • All of the Seven Deadly Sins act more like the criminals the Holy Knights painted them as (with the exception of King who seems to be the most reasonable of them) and are much more unruly, rude and violent.
  • Dale, who was a very kind man and a loving father, left his children to join the ranks of the Holy Knights so he could become stronger and longed for their forgiveness. Here, he's a straight up Abusive Parent who abandons his children, threw them to the bears at least once, denied them food, and threatened to kill them.
  • The king of Liones goes on an offhanded tangent about how he regrets getting rid of child labor.
• Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking:
  • Turns out Ban is in prison this time for killing the Great Holy Knight, attempting to kill the Holy Family, and for eating the world's entire Twinkie supply. The last one is the only one he admits too.
  • And then there's Elaine's thoughts on Ban's constant attempts to steal the fountain of youth. She doesn't mind his company, nor does she really mind him attempting to steal it. Its his goddamn singing she minds.
• Badass Boast: Ban makes a pretty big one after taking off his pedo-stache by-hand
  Band: "Pain is my maiden!"
• Batman Gambit: Episode 4.5 shows that Dreyfus intentionally sent Gilthunder into peace talks knowing he'd utterly fuck it up and lead to a genocide of a barbarian tribe.
• Berserk Button: Meliodas has three so far: Calling his satchel a purse, trying to take the broken sword he carries with him, and calling him a Leprechaun.
• Black Eyes of Crazy:
  • At 2:27 of episode 2 Diane briefly exhibits these, while saying something that sounds like gibberish but is "impregnate me" played backwards.
  • Played more straight when Meliodas goes fully into his Superpowered Evil Side in episodes 7 and 8.
• Bond Villain Stupidity: Ruin blows his own cover to Elizabeth and Hawk and his plan to them. They don't hesitate to point it out to him.
  Hawk: Um, excuse me. Why are you telling us this? You could've just stayed hidden and waited for us to kill each other off. At least that's what a smart guy would do...
  Elizabeth: And people call me retarded!
• Brick Joke: Meliodas tells Hawk to grab the nearest blunt object and beat him to death with it if he runs into the other Deadly Sins again. When he runs into Diane later in the episode...
  Meliodas: "Pig?"
  Hawk: "Yeah?"
  Meliodas: "Grab somethin' blunt."
• But for Me, It Was Tuesday: Episode 4 has King stabbing Ban, feeling he killed Elaine.
  "Hey, I've killed a bunch of people's families, thank you very much. What makes you so special, your heinie?"
• Camp Straight: Marmas has a camp southern act going, and he has a wife.
• Casting Couch: Episode 5 has Twigo say he was quite willing to suck Hendrickson's dick to keep his job after the fuckup he had way back in Episode 1, but he'd just as well drink demon blood... and then he blows up.
• Catchphrase: Ban has a few.
  There ain't NUTHIN' I can't steal!
  But CYAAAAAAPTAIN!
  • King has "How dare you?!"
• Cerebus Callback: The reason Ban was locked up in this version, amongst his other crimes, was eating all of the world's twinkies. It later turns out, he stole them to share with Elaine.
• Chekhov's Gag: Gilthunder initially came off as a cloudcuckoolander with a penchant for asking completely random questions, including "How are you doing that floating thing?" and "Who let this purple hair attached to a child down here?". Episode 14 however would reveal both were actually very specific code phrases he came up with as a kid and asked Meliodas to remember, the former being for if someone was secretly a member of the Fairy Clan, the latter if someone is being outmatched, making each instance of him asking that cases of him trying to see if the Sins were ready to give the word for him to launch his coup against Hendrickson. Problem was, Meliodas didn't even remember those code phrases until right after Gilthunder launched his coup, and never told the other Sins because he was more interested in getting drunk when Gilthunder first told him.
  Gilthunder: No one would ever say those in normal conversation.
• Cloud Cuckoo Lander:
  • Pretty much EVERYONE in the series seems to live in their own twisted world. The few exceptions are Meliodas, King, Hendrickson, Griamore, Howzer, and Gowther.
  • The biggest example by far is Ban. He "sings" as a past-time (Gowther peered into his mind and claimed there was nothing but song lyrics in there), acts like a complete tool, and is always thinking about something stupid. What goes on in his mind is enough to make Elaine scream.
  Ban: "My mind is a wonderful place..."
• Combat Sadomasochist: Ban, emphasis on the masochist part. If you're going to be immortal, you might as well get used to the pain. Episode 3.5 shows that was like this even before becoming immortal too.
  Ban: (After getting restrained by vines conjured by Elaine) HA! Jokes on you! I'm part masochist!
  Elaine: After watching you fall off a cliff 900 times in a row, that does not surprise me.
• The Comically Serious: Most of the humor from Gowther is based on how absolutely done with everything he is. He largely speaks in monotone, has no issue acting like a Deadpan Snarker to everyone, and regularly pokes around in the other sins heads out of boredom.
• Corrupt Politician: Dreyfus, who lampshades this himself. He embezzles the spoils of war and manipulates the Holy Knights into doing his own dirty work. And when he is lead to believe his son is dead, he uses it for a publicity stunt to get "ahead in the polls".
  Dreyfus: That's why I'm a great political Holy Knight!
• Cute, but Cacophonic:
  • Elizabeth. Her voice is extremely shrill and grating. Margaret is in prison not because of the Knights' coup but because she wanted to utterly get away from Elizabeth and her voice. Subverted when her voice becomes much more normal when she first awakens her Goddess Clan abilities, Diane outright calling it angelic.
  Meliodas: "Holy shit, that's your voice?"
  Hawk: "It's kind of fucked up."
  • As it turns out, both of her sisters are this too, Veronica is essentially Lumpy Space Princess and Margaret sounds like Filthy Frank. Their father sounds like Gilbert Gottfried.
• Deadpan Snarker: Gowther. Full-stop. Every word out of his mouth is laced with dry sarcasm and scathing remarks for anybody. Literally anybody.
• Deceased Fall-Guy Gambit: Gilthunder's massacre of the Germanian tribes is blamed on Xavier, his Kif Krocker-esque sidekick who had previously been killed when Diane threw Gilthunder into a castle he happened to be in.
• Double Tap: Sir Gulgias does this with Meliodas in Episode 3 while he's comatose. That wouldn't have killed him anyway.
• Dream Sequence: Gowther traps Dreyfus in one with his mind powers reminding him You're going to be late.
• Embarrassing Nickname: For Griamore, it's "Tiny". Turns out it's a bit meaningful. And made worse by the fact everyone seems to know about it. Even Ban.
  Howzer: Hey, Princess Veronica! *To Griamore* Hey, Tiny.
  Griamore: You saw my dick ONE TIME!
  (Later)
  Ban: Try me. Tiny.
  Griamore: ONE! TIME!
  Ban: EVERYONE WAS THERE!
• Everybody Hates Mathematics: After Hendrickson gets high on Red Demon blood, he suffers a drop in intelligence and becomes surprisingly bad at counting, needing to verbally count out the four to five Seven Deadly Sins present with his fingers every time he wants to say how many are present.
• Evil Counterpart: Funnily enough, Hendrickson appears to be this for King, although "Evil" is debatable. Both of them are are runner ups for Only Sane Man on both sides of their conflict and are infuriated by their idiotic cohorts. Though while King makes the most of his unwanted situation, Hendrickson goes off the deep end while trying to make his cohorts respect him.
• Expy: Gilthunder's voice and character is pretty much a shout out to Zapp Brannigan from Futurama.
• Eyes Always Shut: Episode 12 reveals Jericho superglued Guila's eyes shut.
• Fighting Irish: Meliodas, who in this sports a heavy Irish brogue and chock full o' Irish stereotypes but just as capable a fighter as ever.
• Foreign Queasine: A mutual example as both Meliodas and Guila think the food of the other's country are disgusting and their own is the best.
  Guila: A full-counter! A move a dwab and boring as your shitty Irish cuisine.
  Meliodas: What's wrong with Potatoes and beer?!
• Foreshadowing: When Meliodas is dreaming while in a coma, he envisions Elizabeth with a normal voice rather than her usual Cute, but Cacophonic voice which brings him immense joy. When she later awakens her Goddess Clan heritage after Hendrickson kills Hawk, her voice becomes overlaid with the one from Meliodas' dream, suggesting that's her real voice she had as a member of the Goddess Clan, and Meliodas was remembering how she truly sounded in her past life.
• French Jerk: Guila here is stereotypically French, is condescending to foreign cuisine, and is all-around rude. Of course, she's a bad guy (at the moment) so antagonism is to be expected, but the rudeness isn't.
• The Friend Nobody Likes:
  • Gowther, who insults everyone with personal information and is only nominally an ally of the sins. Even Ban (who usually likes having people to mess with) and Elizabeth (who's too dumb to know she's being insulted) can't stand the guy.
  • No one gives Jericho any respect on either side of the conflict. Ban keeps calling her "Jerry" and inadvertently disrespects her, her Only Friend Guila considers her annoying, Howzer sees her as The Load, and no one gave a damn when she turned into a demon but quickly changed tunes when Guila was at risk.
• Genre Savvy: Golgias realizes the Theme Music Power-Up moment when Meliodas grabs his sword in episode 3, making him pull a Screw This, I'm Outta Here. Of course, it doesn't prevent him from a beating anyway.
• Girl's Night Out Episode: Episode 5 has Elizabeth want one with Diane, but then they shrink and end up getting into the tournament.
• Gratuitous French: This show's version of Guila not only has the accent, but also peppers her sentences with French words. Her conversation with her brother in Episode 9.5 is entirely in French.^note  Bad French, mind you. The little brother's pronunciation isn't great, but it's passable. Guila's is horrible. Otherwise, the grammar and dialogue is fine.
• Groin Attack: Ban is on the receiving end of it from Jericho in Episode 7, and to the tune of "Seven Nation Army."
• Hillbilly Incest: For this Abridged Series, Dawn Roar has been reimagined from being a Badass Crew into a Badass Family called the Skeeter Brothers. Each character is given a stereotypical redneck name and accent. Fitting the redneck theme, Token Female Jessie is also a Lust Object for the leader Skeeter (his canon counterpart, Slader, was a Manly Gay fighter).
• Hollywood Tone-Deaf: Ban. And Elizabeth. Both have comically terrible voices, though Ban seems to enjoy this fact.
• Impossibly Awesome Magic Trick: Everyone thinks that the 'floaty thing' that King does is this, much to his annoyance.
• Insanity Immunity: Ban's mind can't be read. When Elaine attempts it, she is blasted with a horrifying kazoo rendition of The Final Countdown and hellish screaming. When Gowther tries later, he just comments that there's nothing in Ban's head but song lyrics.
• Insistent Terminology:
  • It's a satchel, not a purse.
  • In Skeeter's case he insists Jessie is his brother and not a girl. Every time it's brought up, the One-Woman Wail from MGSV gets used.
• Intelligible Unintelligible: Diane is able to have a conversation with Hawk's Mom.
• Killed Mid-Sentence: Jude tries to do this to Ban by stabbing him in the heart, thinking he can only turn invisible. Too bad he's invincible.
• Malicious Misnaming: Played with. Ban keeps calling Jericho "Jerry", and while Jericho thinks it's a case of this and is one of the reasons she initially hates Ban, Ban himself is being a cloudcuckoolander and legitimately thinks Jericho is a boy, but based on his pretending to speak for her in Episode 3, he knows on some level how much it pisses her off, he just doesn't care.
• Mind Rape: Episode 12 has Dreyfus get this from Gowther.
• Noble Demon: Hendrickson. While he is still concocting horrid experiments by having apprentice Holy Knights drink demon blood, he seems to be much more responsible and reasonable compared to Dreyfus.
• No Indoor Voice: Elizabeth and Ban seem to have no volume control whatsoever!
• Non Sequitur, *Thud*: After Diane knocks out Howzer in the tournament, she checks if he's okay and he's singing “I'm Walking On Sunshine.”
• Not-So-Harmless Villain: Dreyfus at first appears to be a General Failure who has no idea what he's doing, but behind closed doors, he reveals that he's a Manipulative Bastard with a devious mind.
• Not So Above It All:
  • Episode 9 is devoted to showing that Meliodas and King can be just as dumb as Ban.
  • Hendrickson can be just as evil and manipulative as Dreyfus when he wants to be.
  • Also, while Hendrickson is arguably the most serious character in the show, he still has his moments of this. While seemingly annoyed with Helbram trying to give Meliodas a Dark and Troubled Past during their fight (even calling it "dumb fanfiction"), he still gives him advice on how to make it better.
    Hendrickson: Yeah, it was a bit too heartfelt. Maybe try lightening it up a bit.
    Holy Knight: I thought it was just the right amount of heartfelt.
    Hendrickson: Send him to the gallows.
• N-Word Privileges: Elizabeth definitely violates this at the end of episode 2.
• Obfuscating Stupidity: Gilthunder. Kind of.
• O.O.C. Is Serious Business:
  • When Elaine is mortally wounded by Steven the Demon, the normally loud and rambunctious Ban acts subdued, before fighting Steven to the death.
  Ban: (quietly) What were you thinking? Stay here. Shnookums' going to teach someone a lesson. Lesson Number 1: I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!
  • Guila who is French in this series, combines this with Ooh, Me Accent's Slipping. After hearing that her little brother has been repeatedly bullied by his "classmates", she kills them calmly and then states in English with no hint of an accent whatsoever that she will always protect him. Keep in mind that her entire conversation with her brother was in French and also that she had been slightly ditzy up to this point.
• Only Sane Man:
  • King. He's the only member of the Seven Deadly Sins who hates being part of the group as much as Meliodas (maybe even more). He's also the only member who isn't insane, stupid, or consistently mean-spirited... most of the time. By Episode 9 its downplayed, where he gains a bit of an ego and comes across as just as goofy as Meliodas and Ban. After that, he'll tend to share this role with Gowther.
  • Gowther is another downplayed case. While he is rather rude to everyone around him and a perpetual Deadpan Snarker, he's also the only one to acknowledge the threat Hendrickson poses with his demon knights, and the only one at all concerned about the implication Merlin framed Meliodas for the assassination of the Great Holy Knight. And when King's too wrapped up in impressing Diane or sating his ego, Gowther tends to be the only one still making sense.
  • The same can apply to Hendrickson. He seems to be a much more responsible and reasonable authority figure than Dreyfus and is infuriated by the Holy Knights' idiocy and eccentricities.
• Pity the Kidnapper: Ruin tries to surrender the fight and explains to Meliodas that he and the other Weird Fangs just want to be rid of Ban's horrible singing. Too bad Meliodas already killed him.
• Pokémon Speak: Hawk's Mom speaks in a deep “Beep beep.”
• Politically Incorrect Villain: Subverted with Howzer. He's initially shocked and almost disgusted they let a woman (Diane) fight in what he called the "manliest tournament of the series". When he sees Hawk serving everyone beer, he seems mildly pleased.
  "Huh. What a progressive world we live in."
• Pre Ass Kicking One Liner: Gilthunder gets one once Hendrickson realises that he doesn't have any leverage anymore.
  Hendrickson: Just put the sword down, and we can-
  Gilthunder: No. No we can't.
  Cue a twenty second long beat down.
• Real Men Wear Pink: Howzer. The one thing that he wants everyone to know about him is how manly he is, but tries his best to hide the more "feminine" parts of himself.
• Related in the Adaptation: In the anime, the Dawn Roar team were an elite team of Holy Knights. Here, they're a Badass Family.
• Remember the New Guy?: Parodied with Gustaf, Jericho's older brother. He isn't mentioned at all until Episode 15 until Jericho randomly drops the detail he exists as she's turning into a demon, and half of his lines and peoples reactions to him revolve around people pointing out that he is Jericho's brother, and acting like he's always been around and important.
• Sanity Slippage: After being revived via demon blood, Hendrickson goes firmly off the deep end, becoming a lot more impulsive and immature. It's largely Played for Laughs of course, but it's still clear whatever marbles he had got lost from having to put up with the Sins for so long.
  Hendrickson: (To Meliodas and the Sins) You taught me to say "Fuck it! Planning's for nerds!" Especially if you got enough raw power to crush your enemies to dust! Which, I assure you, I absolutely do.
• Scatterbrained Senior: Cain is one in this version, barely able to tell the past and present like someone with dementia.
• Shout-Out:
  • In Episode 3, when Jericho introduces herself to Ban by giving him a "close shave," a theme from a different one is used.
• Sir Swears-a-Lot:
  • Meliodas. He can't go five seconds without cursing.
  • Also Margaret, partly due to the being locked up in prison but mostly because Gilthunder visits her all the time to get solutions to his word puzzles.
  Margaret: Seventeen across is GILTHUNDER GO FUCK YOURSELF! GOTTEM!
• Suspiciously Specific Denial: When Vivian kidnaps Elizabeth, Meliodas gets uncharacteristically defensive about how he feels about that, insisting to King that he's more concerned about Hawk.
• The Thing That Would Not Leave: Since unlike in canon he isn't helping Elizabeth search for the Sins here, Meliodas considers all the other Sins this, especially with the fact they're staying at his inn rent free and constantly drink all his booze.
• Trademark Favorite Food:
  • For Ban, it's Twinkies. He loves them so much, he stole the entire world's supply just to share them with Elaine.
  • For Meliodas, it's potatoes. Just potatoes. He's Irish.
• Troll:
  • Ban, full stop, with a side order of insane to boot. Meliodas dreads having to travel with him again due to how ungodly annoying he is.
  • Gowther is this as well, casually airing out the Sins' secrets because he can.
• Unrelated in the Adaptation: Downplayed. In the original series, Meliodas knew Elizabeth since she was an infant, having taken her from the ruins of Danafor after her prior incarnation, Liz, died, and watched over and cared for her as her bodyguard, up until the day the Seven Deadly Sins had to flee and Merlin erased her memory. Here, Meliodas demonstrates no signs of knowing Elizabeth prior to meeting her at the Boar Hat, nor does he express any knowledge of her being a reincarnation of his love, expressing revulsion at the thought she was into him until she was kidnapped by Vivianne, by which point he makes clear, even if he refuses to admit, that he's grown attached.
• Voice Changeling: Elizabeth perfectly copies her father's voice when reciting his message about the sins receiving medals to Hawk in Episode 17.
• Voice of the Legion: Once Elizabeth awakens her innate Goddess Clan abilities, she gives Hendrickson "The Reason You Suck" Speech, but speaks using two voices, her normal one, and, more noticeably, a more "angelic" voice reminiscent of the one Meliodas thought she had in his dream. It's all but said that the latter voice is the voice of her past life as a member of the Goddess Clan, and that her regaining her memories will in turn restore her original voice.
• Yandere: Diane. She looooooooooooooves the Captain, and woe be anyone who gets in her way or does anything she perceives as makes a move on him.
• You Are Already Dead: Meliodas does this to Ruin, right before Ruin decides to ask for mercy.
• You Fight Like a Cow: During Diane's fight against Howzer, she has this with him.

Howzer: Stop moving already and fight like a man!
Diane: If fighting like a man is what you've been doing, then I'll just keep fighting like a girl.
King: Awww shiiiit!

• Younger Than They Look: Exaggerated in Episode 7 when Diane rescues an old man who's actually 16.

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Meliodas: ... grab somethin' blunt.