Subverted Rhyme Every Occasion / Web Original

Subverted Rhymes in web original media.

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• The trope title itself is an example. If you don't get it...we can wait.
• Cake Wrecks does it twice in the description of a wedding cake that appears to have sperm on it First "Roses are red, / Butterflies are blue, / Um... / Pardon me, but are those sperm on your wedding cake?" and then in Poem Option #3: Roses are red / And cake can be pretty. / How sad for you, 'cause yours looks all...[eyeing children]...unpleasant.
• Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series
  • Lampshaded in the duel against the rhyming Paradox Brothers.
  Para: We are villains who like to rhyme...
  Dox: In fact, we do it all the time.
  Para: You may think it's rather crass...
  Dox: But you can stick your cards right up your nose.
  Para: You were supposed to say "ass," brother. I thought we rehearsed this.
  • Also played straight in the second Christmas special:
    The Pharaoh awoke the very next day,
    Wearing an outfit that made him look...uh, handsome.
  • And in "LEATHER PANTS~"
    Marik: We don't want vinyl or chinos or briefs / I am a criminal and he is a thief / and we are hot / hot, hot hot / we are quite sexy.
    Bakura: Marik, that doesn't quite rhyme.
    Marik: SHUT UP I AM LADY GAGA!
• A cult YouTube video parodies the Nickelback song Rockstar with new lyrics lampooning pop singers such as Britney Spears and Ashlee Simpson:
  I'm gonna dress myself without an ounce of class,
  Gonna make the boys all drool and stare at my...glasses
• Used cleverly on multiple occasions in Commentary! The Musical, the musical commentary to Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog:

  Ten Dollar Solo. Not bad so far
  There's internal rhyme
  Although not every instance
  And the meter is occasionally a little bit bizarre

  • and, as sung by Nathan Fillion:

    My wonderful me-ness
    My hammer the peee—
    ople can tell
    That I'm awfully swell...

    • Note that "The hammer is my penis" is an actual line that Nathan Fillion's character says in the original film.
• In Zero Punctuation's review of Saints Row 2:
  Roses are red
  Violets are blue
  Your house is covered
  In piles of excrement
• Similar to the above example. Laina has a nice Valentine's Day poem:
  Roses are red, Violets are blue
  Be my Valentine, I'm waiting for you
  Blood is red, bruises are blue
  Don't say no.
• Cabel Sasser does this in Buggy Saints Row: The Musical:
  My car door's freaking out; it seems to be forever
  In the concrete barricade; I wonder how I'm ever going to drive away.
  This really isn't my day.
  Sparks are flying, people dying, metal frying,
  And I wonder if there's more to life or if I'll find that this is really it.
  This game is a piece of work.
• In this I'm a Marvel... And I'm a DC episode:
  Deadpool: [singing] I'm sure that his power ring's a lot of fun,
  But can it ever really be as cool as my M16 with laser sided scope oh my GOD I love this thing!
• Break It Down, a short skit from the people who would later form Tally Hall, includes the following plan to make a quick buck:
  "I have a better plan
  I'll marry a wealthy man."
  "Wouldn't that make you gay?"
  "Not neccesari-lay...
  ...I'll sleep in a separate bed,
  and I'll refrain from giving...
  [beat]
  ...kisses."
• This video celebrating Stephen Fry reaching one million followers on Twitter.
• Smosh
  • The video Transformers Rap does this.
    Ian: The Transformers creators wouldn't pay us to make this rap
    They told us that the script was full of NONSENSE!
    I bet you thought I was gonna say "crap", cause it rhymes with "rap", but I'm better than that!
• The Key of Awesome
  • In their parody of The Dark Knight, Alfred almost reveals Batman's identity to the Joker:
    Joker, are you busy? Let's call a truce.
    I need you to help explain the plot to...Batman.
  • They also have this verse in their parody of "California Girls":
    Nose jobs, tummy tucks
  These are the girls I like to...hang out with.
• YouTube Poop: THE EPIC MOVIE:
  Nachos, lemon head, my dad's boat
  You won't go down 'cause my dick can EFFORT!!
• A Very Potter Musical's "Back to Hogwarts"
  • Hermione sings:
    But let's not forget that we need to perform well
    In class if we want to pass our... OWLs.
  • And of course:
    You're tall and fun and pretty
    You're really, really skinny...
    CHO CHANG!
• Celebrity Bric-a-Brac Theater has John Madden in the boots of Santa Claus. And we hear him exclaim as he rides out of sight:
  Merry Christmas to everybody and also goodnight to everybody!
• Red vs. Blue Revelation
  • The soundtrack has a track called "Your Best Friend" where Caboose sings about his friendship with Church. It's full of this trope.
  ''Remember that time that I saved your life? You were happy, I could tell.
  You said something about how I was smart and I make your life a living heaven.
  We do everything together like hide and go seek, your favorite game.
  But I'm so glad that we found each other and I know you feel the identical way as me.
  • In the soundtrack for Season 9, Tucker's song "Bow Chicka Wow Wow Wow" has a variation that's something of a cross between this and Rhyming with Itself.
    I'm so alone out in this canyon
    Not one single girl in this canyon
    Or anything rhyming with canyon
    So call on me if you need a companion
  • It also has "Donut: The Musical", which is literally nothing but subversions and double entendres, sung by Ambiguously Gay and/or Camp Straight Donut. The main lyric is "Let me blow you... [uncomfortably long pause] ...away"; you can work out the rest on your own.
• The YouTube video "Pale kid raps fast" has these lyrics:
  I'm five foot eleven of sex
  From the tip of my head to my gorgeous... knees.
• JibJab does this with "The Year 2008 in Review," sung to the tune of "Miss Susie." One example:
  Baby Year 2008: Barack [sic] defeated Johnny
  So long to the far-right.
  Now McCain has many houses,
  But none of them are...
  White men got passed over,
  From Wasilla she was plucked;
  When the maverick tapped a hockey mom
  The press said, "What the..."
  Truck bombs in Islamabad;
  Bill Gates up and quit.
  Putin stuck his chest out,
  Told the Georgians to eat...
  Ships were seized by pirates,
  Ike and Gustav hit,
  Johnny's honey had a baby,
  But he said it wasn't...
  HIIIIISSS-tory's now littered
  With more famines, floods and wars.
  If there's one thing I am grateful for,
  It's that this job's now YOOOOUUUURS!
• The Friendship is Witchcraft episode "Neigh, Soul Sister" features a couple of these in Sweetie Belle's song about the big race:
  The race has begun
  We must run fast
  Jump over the mud
  Having a good time

and

Making tacky jelly
Put it on your head
We're gonna win the race
Because I am a good racer!

• The opening line of her earlier song might qualify, depending on where she was going with it:
  Just because you feel upset
  Does not mean you have to yell

• In The Nostalgia Chick's The Lorax (2012) episode, she speaks in rhyme several times throughout, the final verse being:
  It burns me like this cheap whisky,
  Right down to my thorax.
  I'm your Nostalgia Chick,
  And I speak...for underrated Dr. Seuss books from the 1970s.
• The Literal Music Video for Anything For Love contains the following lines as Meatloaf appears to nuzzle his head in his co-star's cleavage:
  I hope it fits
  You've got real nice...
  Where'd my make-up go?
  It must have rubbed off between your boobs!
• Sporcle's Game of Thrones limerick quiz has this little ditty.
  This guy he has all the worst luck.
  He could have been quite the young buck.
  But he'll stay rather small,
  Cuz he had a bad fall,
  After seeing two Lannisters kiss.
• Ultra Fast Pony: "I'm a poet and I didn't even realize it."
• In the Prologue game of The Several Journeys of Reemus game, Liam the bear sings one of two short ballads at the end, depending on whether you got the "Reckless" or "Legendary" ending. The last two lines of the "Legendary" ballad fall under this trope:
  Now the townsfolk gossip about this ingenious trick
  Instead of the length of Reemus' ... hair
• Several times in Don't Hug Me I'm Scared:
  Yellow: It's quarter to 8, there's fish on my plate
  Green: It's 20 past day, there's fish on my tray
  Yellow: It's eleven to twelve, there's fish in the bath
  Red: It's 9:30, there's fish everywhere
  \\
  Tony: There's a time and a place for mucking around!
  Green: Like birthdays!
  Red: Or camping!
  Yellow: I'm friends with my dad...
  
  Green: Oh look, there he goes, flying through the sky.
  Red: Maybe we should follow him, or we'll get left behind.
  Green: But there's still lots of chicken left, and I'd like to eat the chicken.
  Red: I'd also like to eat the chicken. Let's do that instead.
• Parody artist Jon Cozart, a.k.a. Paint:
  • In "After Ever After 2", Cozart dodges the obvious rhyme for Mulan's sex change operation.
    I sank like a brick / Prince thinks I'm sick / Ice is melting quick / Now I have a ... lot of self esteem
  • In "Boy Brand", the One Direction part almost ends with a curse before being shushed.
    We all know we're beautiful / That's what makes you buy our shhhhhh...
• Sex Offender Shuffle:
  Charles Dolling, dropping rhymes
  I've been arrested seven times
  I know that sounds like a lot
  But three of those times were for vandalism
• Chicken Attack by Portal A and the Gregory Brothers, starring Chicken Yodeller Takeo Ischi:
  You should know that a man with the power of nature
  Can bring you to the end of your luck
  And you should know by my stride and the look in my eye
  That you're about to be massively...
  Forced to give up!
  • Subverted later in the same song, when the lyric "massively fucked" is used.
• Whateley Universe: In conjunction with Curse Cut Short and Last-Second Word Swap. In Blood Sister, Blood Brother:
  Miss Mary had a steamboat, the steamboat had a bell
  Miss Mary went to Heaven, the steamboat went to
  Hello operator, please give me number Nine
  And if you disconnect me, I’ll kick you from
  Behind the frigerator, there lies a piece of glass
  Miss Mary sat upon it and broke her little
  Ask me no more questions, I’ll tell you no more lies
  The boys are in the bathroom, a zipping up their
  Flies are in the city, the bees are in the park
  Miss Mary and her boyfriend are kissing in the D-A-R-K
  D-A-R-K
  D-A-R-K
  Dark, Dark, Dark!
• In the Homestar Runner Original Sountrack, some unused "Sbemail Songs" are included. One of them goes:
  Ooh, it's been so long
  Since I sang an email music... thing...
  • Also, in Fish Eye Lens:
  I jumped in slow motion! Off the curb!
  Without a skateboard, that should look absurd
  But with my fish-eye-lens, hey, ain’t ya heard
  I got the moves so smooth, make your mom say... those are some exceptionally smooth moves.
• The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the it's my book they will walk if I tell them to by Tom Cardy has this gem, relying mainly on the audience's knowledge of the iconic line from The Lord of the Rings:
  Orc, run
  A Balrog has come!
  Kick him in the ass,
  You shall not FUCK WITH ME!
• Mario Mind Rhyme by The Stringini Bros combines this with grotesquely-proportioned versions of Mario to create:
  Mario stood by the sea.
  All that water really made him have to go...
  (The camera zooms.)
  Straighten his tie.
  (Chorus.)
  • The last verse subverts this:
  Mario had an aunt whose name was Enis.
  But she took a hammer and smashed his one and only...
  (Mario is hit so hard his brain flies out.)
  (Scene of Mario in his grave, chorus.)
• In the full version of "Great At Crime" from Epithet Erased, various Banzai Blasters pitch in different rhyming lines during the chorus. The last one is...
  I failed remedial English!
  I don't understand basic rhyme structure!
• Map Men: In "The Mystery of the Squarest Country", we get these lines:
  Jay: Uganda cannot be a square because of all the lakes,
  The Gambia, Vietnam, and Panama all look like snakes.
  Haiti, Croatia, and Zambia all have shapes that wrap around,
  Syria's just a bit too slopey and El Salvador's too long.
  Mark: That didn't rhyme.

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