Exactly What It Says on the Tin: a television series, airing on TLC, consisting of re-enacted anecdotes about sexual activities that don’t quite go as planned and actually require a visit to the emergency room.
Also inspired the holiday special Santa Sent Me to the ER and a Christmas Episode of its own ("Holiday Hanky Panky").
Examples of tropes on Sex Sent Me to the ER:
- Can't Get Away with Nuthin': Don't expect any couples who are doing it in places they shouldn't be to not get caught.
- Destructo-Nookie: One couple had to go to the ER after things got pretty heated in bed to the point where he accidentally put his girlfriend's head through the headboard, which resulted in her having a head injury.
- Dramatization: the re-enactments of the events, often with a lot of and discreet (and not-so-discreet) camera angles to hide the Not Safe for Work parts.
- Groin Attack: While not generally an attack per se, injuries to the genitalia are among the most common reasons for the trip to the emergency room.
- One case which most definitely was a Groin Attack involved a man who was admitted to the ER with a severely swollen scrotum, but the staff were puzzled when he continued to refuse pain medication. Eventually, as the man's wife and mistress began arguing in the ER, the doctors had to explain to him that without immediate surgery he would lose his testicles, which finally convinced him to accept treatment. The attack occurred when his wife happened upon her pain-loving husband slumped over his desk with his pants around his ankles after a session with a female lawyer who was his domme. Expecting that it was the dominatrix returning, he asked to be given a kick in the gonads... and boy, did he get one!
- I Call Him "Mister Happy":
- One couple referred to the man's penis as 'Paolo'. When they went to the ER after he suffered a penile fracture, no one could understand who Paolo was, or how he was injured. Funnier still, members of their church came by to console them, and ended up in a prayer circle praying for Paolo's recovery.
- Kinky Cuffs
- One couple were wearing Cosplay costumes (as a dragon and a princess). They decided that adding handcuffs would be fun, and that her vagina was a good, safe place to keep the key. They need to go to the ER while still handcuffed, still in costume.
- Laser-Guided Karma: The aforementioned lawyer, while his testicles were saved, loses his wife with his mistress acting as her divorce attorney.
- Making Love in All the Wrong Places: For starters:
- A tree limb is not, as a rule, a safe place to have sex. Just sayin'.
- A couple in a public park start to make out, and are rolling on the ground naked... when they roll over a beehive. Did we mention that the woman is allergic to bee stings?
- A woman leads her rather reluctant lover into a cemetery on Halloween night, with the intention of making love between the gravestones. His superstitious fears are confirmed when he rolls into an open grave, breaking his collarbone. And then they have to explain what they were doing there to the police and EMTs...
- A couple was in a field, in the south, when a snake bit the woman. Boyfriend rushed her to the ER, and when told that they needed to know what snake it was to give the proper anti-venom, he rushed back out and caught the same type of snake if not the same exact one. He's a keeper.
- An attic isn't a bad place to sneak into as a rule. But that roll of pink stuff isn't actually carpeting. It's fiberglass. If you actually had the measles, it would have been a whole lot worse.
- Moment Killer: Usually in a quite painful manner.
- Oh, Crap!: In conjunction with the Moment Killer. And sometimes in a manner worthy of Wile E. Coyote.
- Overcome with Desire: The consequences of lovemaking is at the heart of the series' premise. Also, quite a few stories involve couples being a little too spontaneous for safety, leading them to either rushing things in careless manner, or Making Love in All the Wrong Places.
- Orifice Invasion: A man was meditating in a forest, in the nude, hoping it would improve his sex life (to say It Makes Sense in Context would be a stretch). A legless lizard crawled up his urethra. Oddly, not only did he wait several days to go to the ER for help, but he was more concerned about the welfare of the lizard than his own discomfort.
- Point-and-Laugh Show: While the scenes are re-enactments, they nonetheless count, as the humor to be found in people (for example) getting vibrators stuck in places they don't normally go has an endless appeal to some demographics.
- Ready for Lovemaking: A frequent precursor to the incident.
- Sticky Situation: A tube of super-glue accidentally ends up in the same drawer that a couple keep their lubricant.
- The Tooth Hurts: One victim ends up losing both her front teeth when she bumps her face onto the windowsill following a sneaky romp with her college sweetheart. Her roommate didn't want him in their dorm and nearly got him arrested for assault following this, until she finally told the truth as to what really happened.
- Two-Person Pool Party: A couple at a pool party are alone in the pool for a while, so they decide to get their suits off and start with the lovemaking... until the woman gets her toe caught in one of the pool grates.
