Release: July 18, 2017
Film: Hulk
Tagline: Before he was everyone's favorite smashing machine, Hulk had a strangely rocky start.
This review contains examples of:
- Actor Allusion: Seeing Jennifer Connelly's dull acting as Betsy Ross, especially at the scene where Dave chews on an electric wire, has the Critic wish he could bring back the energy she had as Sarah Williams in Labyrinth.
- Attention Deficit... Ooh, Shiny!: The Critic finds the film so boring he was briefly excited at a car moving past a scene where Betsy meets her father.
- Chewing the Scenery: The Critic loves Nick Nolte's performance as Dave at the end of the movie, especially when it becomes very literal.
- Corpsing: The "ZUUL MOTHERFUCKER" joke gets interrupted at the sight of the mutated dogs with the demon voice laughing at the poodle.
- Damned by Faint Praise: Besides Nolte, according to the Critic some of the few good scenes in the movie are The Cameo of Stan Lee and Lou Ferrigno, who played the Hulk in the 1977 TV series, as well as a joke made by Betsy about exploding frogs.
- Dull Surprise: The Critic groans at Jennifer Connelly's performance as Betty Ross.
- Faux Symbolism: Parodied with the green walls in the scene where Glenn tries to recruit Betsy into his project apparently symbolizing the Hulk's presence in so boring a film as this. In a more serious example, the Critic also wonders if a lonely swing at the scene where Bruce visits his since-abandoned hometown is an allegory for the film's director Ang Lee seeking salvation from this movie.
- Idiosyncratic Wipes: The abuse of this element throughout the film is the Critic's biggest pick with it. He theorizes that this was made to give the film a "feel" similar to its comic-book origins, but ultimately thinks it worked better in other superhero films because they have far more action than this film.
- Narm: The scene where Bruce sees Dave stalking him with three dogs is so not intimidating the Critic puts up a sketch of Tamara doing the same and trying not to laugh.
- The One Thing I Don't Hate About You: The Critic considers the scene of Dave's hand merging with its surroundings to be, in all honesty, the only cool scene in the movie."Goddammit, why'd that cool hand have to be attached to Nick Nolte? And why'd that Nick Nolte have to be attached to this film?"
- Parody Commercial: The two halves of the review are divided with a commercial for an Incredible Hulk action figure which, instead of bringing excitement, only makes a pair of children (Malcolm and Tamara) more emotional.
- Playing Against Type: The Critic lays part of the blame for the film's poor performance on the producers' decision to hire Ang Lee as director, a particularly jarring departure for someone whose forte is subtle social drama, such as Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. He can also tell that in this film Lee is just a director for hire, whereas the latter film was a work of love.
- Pun: In case someone thinks the Idiosyncratic Wipes are only "mildly annoying", the Critic gives a reminder that the entire film is abundant with these such that the "m" in "mildly" will turn upside-down to read "wildly".
- Running Gag: The Critic shouting out "The Hulk" which gets more painful with each dull moment in the movie.
- Sam Elliot's usual drawl makes NC feel like he's listening to him speak with his mouth full of food. Anytime General Ross speaks, NC yells "Chew and swallow!"
- Shout-Out:
- The opening and closing sketches takes cues from the respective credits of the 1977 TV series, with the Critic labeled as "The Incredible Sulk".
- The use of Idiosyncratic Wipes to capture a "comic-book feel" (like its source material) is compared to putting captions into It, including including Pennywise's iconic "Wa-ha!" laugh.
- After Banner flashes back to his happier days with Betsy with a photograph which shows them moving inside, an annoyed Critic claims he will wait for Sirius Black's magically-animated wanted poster to knock them out with a bottle of butter-beer.
- The slow buildup to the appearance of the Hulk is compared to a poor man's version of that of Jaws; with the foreground focusing on the beaker instead of the Hulk, he also compares it to the latter film focusing on the life preserver instead of the shark itself.
- The scene where Glenn dies in an explosion, in a manner where a still of him is superimposed over said explosion, is compared to the opening credits of Charlie's Angels.
- Dave starting to go Large Ham at the end of the movie is compared to his best Yosemite Sam impression.
- Star-Derailing Role: Downplayed. The Critic thinks this film was a blemish in the otherwise stellar career of Ang Lee, from which he eventually recovered with such hits as Brokeback Mountain and Life of Pi.
- Subverted Catchphrase: At the end."I'm the Nostalgia Critic and... I need to journey to find better movies to watch."
- Take That!:
- The Critic condemns the film as a bigger blow to the reputation of superhero movies than Batman & Robin, which at least was colorful and entertainingly bad.
- When the Hulk flees to San Francisco, the Critic thinks he went to stop further filmings of Fuller House.
- Seeing Dave turn into a Rock Monster has the Critic dub lines into Hulk saying that as bad as their film was, at least it's not as bad as Fantastic Four (2015).
- After seeing the mutant dogs, the Critic imitates Stan Lee negatively comparing this to Stripperella, another one of his comic book creations, when he calls Ang Lee to say how ridiculous the scene is.
- Wacky Sound Effect: The Idiosyncratic Wipes in the movie are given cartoon sounds for each time they happen.
- Why We Can't Have Nice Things: The Critic blames this film for a general lack of interest in future solo movies starring the Hulk, despite the recent popularity of the Mark Ruffalo version as he appears in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.
