Recap / Tales From The Crypt S 5 E 7 House Of Horror

They say that making the cut is hard, but this is a bit much.

Crypt Keeper: (wearing a powdered wig and a judge's robe, seated behind a bench; he bangs a gavel) Fright Court is now in session. Will the defendant please approach the bench? (the camera approaches) You stand accused of watching too much Tales from the Crypt. Do you understand the charge? (the camera shakes its head "no") Neither do I. But I'll tell you this: if convicted, you'll receive a stiff sentence. You may even do a little horrid time. How do you bleed? Alright, then. Let the trial begin. Our first piece of evidence is a tale about a couple of college boys who are about to undergo a little trial and terror of their own, in a writ of habeous corpses I call: House of Horror.

Waters (Keith Coogan), Arling (Wil Wheaton), and Henderson (Jason London) are three pledges of the Gamma Delta fraternity (currently on probation) who are not having a good time in college. They are routinely treated as slaves by pledge master Les Wilton (Kevin Dillon), a sadistic bully who enjoys torturing them and forcing them to demean themselves in the hopes of becoming full-fledged fraternity brothers. The trio's final step of the initiation process is for them to enter the Cougher House, a derelict house said to be haunted by the ghost of an axe-wielding murderer with a hacking cough, and reach the attic alive. The house isn’t actually haunted, as Les and his tech expert brother Sparks have rigged all kinds of tricks and traps in the house to scare the trio out.

Meanwhile, the newly formed Delta Omega Alpha sorority, led by Mona, visits the fraternity. Mona wants a few men from the fraternity to join her and her sisters for dinner, during which they can discuss affiliation opportunities during social events. Les suspects that Mona is pulling a stunt as part of her own sorority hazing process, so taunts her by inviting her and her sisters to come watch as he and the frat brothers lead the pledges into the house. To Les' surprise, Mona accepts. But to even greater shock, there appear to be disturbances going on in the house that weren't pre-prepared by Les' pranking frat brothers, prompting Les to investigate the house himself. Are the hauntings of the Cougher House as true as they say? Or is there something more ghoulish at work?

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Tropes

• Added Alliterative Appeal: Les warns Arling about the case of D.D. Dewitt by saying that they rendered him "degraded, debilitated, and defunct".
• An Arm and a Leg: Henderson's arm is tossed out a window to the pledges below. They initially think it isn't real, but they discover that it's quite real when they notice Henderson's pledge ring on its hand.
• Asshole Victim: Les, who meets the business end of a chainsaw by Mona and her ghouls. It's utterly impossible to sympathize with him since he's The Bully to his pledges, current and former, and not to mention his idea of sending his pledges to the top floor of a supposedly haunted house as their final initiation ritual, which as the ending shows, leads to the deaths of Henderson and Waters.
• As You Know: At Les' request, Waters, Henderson, and Arling spell out the history of the Cougher House and its original owner for the benefit of the audience.
• The Bad Guy Wins: Mona and her sisters are successful in killing and eating Henderson, Waters, and Les. They end the episode by being hinted to go after Arling and the rest of the frat brothers next.
• Between My Legs: Arling is seen entering the Cougher House from between Mona's legs.
• Blackmail: Les presented classified evidence on the Dean to get him to conceal the fact that his frat was leading a cheating scandal, and was made Gamma Delta's pledge master in return.
• Bookends: Les brags about "The Wall of Shame" for pledges who fail to complete their initiations, such as D.D. Dewitt. At the end, when Les is surrounded and killed by Mona and her ghoul sisters, she brags about her own "Wall of Shame" for pledges who don't eat every last bite, Les' blood splattering on it.
• The Bully: Les, both to his three current pledges and to former pledge D.D. Dewitt, who had a nervous breakdown as a result of the torment. He's stayed the fraternity's pledge master for six years, not even bothering to drop out or graduate solely to torment new pledges.
• Butt-Monkey: Arling, Henderson, and Waters are treated as slaves by Les. Eventually, Les becomes a bigger butt monkey by D.D. Dewitt, being humiliated in front of his fraternity before he ultimately his Karmic Death.
• Chainsaw Good: A chainsaw is the weapon of choice for Mona and her sorority sisters to use on their targets, as shown near the end of the episode, when they corner and kill Les with it.
• Chekhov's Gunman: D.D. Dewitt, the former pledge who was mentioned to have suffered a nervous breakdown as a result of failing his initiation ritual, is revealed to be behind many of the disturbances with Les' prank surrounding the Cougher House.
• Comedic Spanking: Les is heavily hinted to submit the pledges to this, since he menacingly wields a wooden paddle in the opening scene.
• Comedic Underwear Exposure: Arling, Waters, and Henderson spending the opening scene in briefs that say "Kick Me" could easily be seen as funny, if they weren't being forced to do so by the sadistic Les.
• Cruel and Unusual Death: Henderson, Waters, and Les are chainsawed to death and made meals for Mona and her sorority. It's implied at the end that Arling and the rest of the frat boys are next.
• Dartboard of Hate: Les treats the picture of failed pledge D.D. Dewitt on the "Wall of Shame" this way early in the episode by hitting it with a dart.
• Deadly Game: The pledges' task to reach the Cougher House's top floor is treated like one, with Les even wagering 100 bucks for Arling to go in.
• Death by Adaptation: Les and the pledges. In the comic, the pledges vanished once they got to the top, and Les was sent in after them. The cops found him alive, but driven insane, and with no sign of the pledges. Here, they all get eaten by Mona and her sisters, whether explicitly shown or implied to become so.
• Dirty Coward: Les is exposed as a coward near the end by D.D. Dewitt, the failed pledge who he tormented into a nervous breakdown.
• Does This Remind You of Anything?? The entire episode paints a glaringly obvious picture: fraternity hazing can often lead to danger.
• The Dog Bites Back: D.D. Dewitt gets one over on Les by wearing a cloak and pretending to be the ghost of the Cougher, which leaves Les screaming and shamed in front of his frat brothers. He did this because Les had previously tormented him after he failed his initiation, to the point where he suffered a nervous breakdown.
• Dying Curse: When he was swindled out of his own house by a Jerkass mayor, the Cougher cursed his former residence before he killed himself, vowing that he would return from the grave to kill any fraternity brother who stepped inside. The curse seemed to come true when nine members of the fraternity who bought the house, one of whom was the mayor's son, were hacked up with an axe. It's proven at the end that the Cougher's whole story was made up.
• Eviler than Thou: Les is the ultimate capital-A asshole frat bully, but he has the bad luck of running into a female frat composed of flesh-eating ghouls.
• Evil Is Hammy: Les, being the obnoxious and abusive dick he is, does not once ever ease up on the ham. DOA's own pledge mistress gets pretty hammy when she reveals herself and her sisters to be ghouls.
• Exact Words: When ordering Henderson and Waters out of the attic, Arling reminds Les that his instructions said he would get them himself, forcing him to live up to his word.
• Expy: Les is basically Brett C. Shelton, if he led a college fraternity instead of a military school.
• Fate Worse than Death: The "Wall of Shame" is painted as one of these, as whoever is pictured on it is barred from the fraternity and loathed by everyone else who's a member, who torment them nonstop. D.D. Dewitt can vouch for the claim, as Les and his brothers made his life hell when he flunked his own initiation.
• Feet-First Introduction: Mona is given one to accentuate her sex appeal.
• Foreshadowing: Les threatens the pledges that they'll end up like D.D. Dewitt on the "Wall of Shame" if they don't complete their initiations. Guess who drops by and scares the living shit out of Les near the end of the story?
  • Les and the brothers also hear chainsaw sounds inside the house, even though Sparks was told to use sounds reminiscent of an axe murderer, and they play even when he's not using his remote control. The ending reveals that the sounds were from a real chainsaw, used by the ghouls to kill Les. She did say that she and her sisters "LOVE fraternity men", after all, and did want them to join them for "dinner".
    • Henderson also jokes about using a chainsaw to kill Les as he and his fellow pledges debate on how they would do it.
• Fiendish Fraternity:
  • Gamma Delta seems to be fun for its official members, but through his humiliations and tortures, Les makes things an absolute nightmare for pledges foolish or unlucky enough to want to join.
  • DOA is worse: kind of hard to top a college fraternity composed of cannibals.
• For the Evulz: Les has stayed in his college fraternity for six years, not even bothering to graduate or drop out as long as he gets to torment helpless pledges.
• The Friend Nobody Likes: Les. His fraternity brothers talk trash behind his back, and his pledges only tolerate him to become brothers. Les also blackmailed the Dean of the university with personal evidence to cover up a cheating scandal and obtain the position of pledge master, which he has gotten away with for six years. As the frat brothers say to the pledges, "Guys like Wilton never graduate."
• Fun with Acronyms: What makes Delta Omega Alpha, the name of Mona's sorority, a Meaningful Name is due to its acronyms — "DOA", which stands for "Dead On Arrival".
• Gory Discretion Shot: Les' death at the end is marked with his blood splattering on a ramshackle "Wall of Shame" sign inside the Cougher House.^note  That being said, there's a scene of his severed head right after that to make the display of his death more explicit.
• Hate Sink: Les is meant to be seen only as a twisted bully who gets his jollies off of bossing his pledges around and forcing them to demean themselves to become members of his fraternity.
• Haunted House: The Cougher House, alleged to be haunted by the ghost of a murderer with a hacking cough, who killed nine brothers of the fraternity who took it over (one of them being the son of the mayor who stole the guy's house from under him), which led the house to be condemned. It's proven at the end that the legend of the Cougher's ghost was made up and printed in the university's newspaper so pledges could research it for initiations, but the house is being used as a living space for a sorority of flesh-eating ghouls.
• The Hermit: The Cougher, the alleged original owner of the haunted house that drives the plot.
• I Kiss Your Foot: Les makes Arling do this with his shoes. With dog shit on them.
• Incurable Cough of Death: The Cougher supposedly got his name for his hacking cough, which could be heard miles away. Sparks later plays hacking coughs inside the Cougher House itself to psyche out the pledges.
• Informed Attribute: One of the fraternity brothers, Tex Crandell, is noted to be the Gamma Delta president, but it would seem that Les is the real decision maker for the fraternity. He finally shows his true power at the end of the episode, where he threatens Les with expulsion if he doesn't search for the missing Waters and Henderson.
• Initiation Ceremony: Les forces the pledges to get to the top floor of an allegedly haunted house alive if they wish to be accepted as fraternity brothers. DOA has their own ceremony to lure a fraternity brother into their sorority house's attic and eat them alive.
• Ironic Echo: Les acts like a chicken to persuade the pledges into going into the Cougher House. His fellow fraternity men throw this back at him when he's dared to go up to the second floor, and again by Dewitt, when he gets revenge on Les for the torture he put him through.
  • There's also Mona's claim about how she and her sisters "love fraternity boys".
• Jerkass Has a Point: Les suspected that Mona inviting herself and her sisters to watch the pledge's initiation as part of their own hazing ceremony. Not only was this revealed to be the truth, but Les found himself to be the sisters' guest of honor, i.e. their dinner.
• Karma Houdini: Mona and her ghouls get away with killing Les, Henderson, and Waters, and end the episode by going after Arling and the rest of the fraternity brothers.
• Kensington Gore: Les is shown to have covered the Cougher House's stairway railing in strawberry jam, made to look like it's blood.
• "Kick Me" Prank: The pledges have "Kick Me" on the seats of their briefs, establishing their rather pathetic status.
• Kick the Dog: After forcing Arling to kiss his dog-shit covered sneakers, Les smears it all over the floor to increase the pledge's workload of scrubbing it with his toothbrush.
• Meaningful Name: Overlaps with the above-listed Fun with Acronyms. Delta Omega Alpha, the name of Mona's sorority, is referred to as "DOA", which stands for "Dead On Arrival".
• Nausea Fuel: Les forcing Arling to kiss his sneakers' soles... after he's stepped in dog shit.
• Nobody Calls Me "Chicken"!: Waters is told that someone in a cloak and holding an axe can be seen through the window, but he goes in anyway when Les starts clucking.
• Off with His Head!: Les gets his head chopped off with a chainsaw, where it rolls down the stairs and lets the fraternity brothers know what's happened to him.
• Our Ghouls Are Creepier: Mona and her sorority sisters look like normal women in the light so as to blend in with society, but they transform into ghouls who prey on fraternity men in their sorority house.
• Red Herring: The Cougher's ghost alleged to be haunting his old house is proven false, since Les reveals that the whole story was made up and printed in the campus paper so pledges could research it. It's also subverted once it's revealed that Mona and her sisters were behind all the killings.
• The Reveal: The Cougher House isn't haunted by the ghost of its former owner after all. Les admits to Arling that the whole story was made up and printed in the campus newspaper so inaugural pledges could research it. The ending reveals that it's actually the sorority house of Mona and her sisters, who are actually ghouls that feed on fraternity brothers.
• Sadist: Les, who has stayed in college longer than a frat brother normally should solely to torment people, and looks back fondly on the time he tortured Dewitt to the point of a nervous breakdown.
• "Scooby-Doo" Hoax: The tale of the Cougher's ghost was actually made up years ago and printed in the campus paper so pledges could look it up. Les and his friend Sparks rig up various machines, sound effects, and dummies to scare the pledges out of the house to sell them on the legend. When things start going wrong and the pledges go missing, it's generally revealed that D.D. Dewitt tampered with Les' plot and scared him shitless as revenge for the torment he put him through. This reveal is then topped by another reveal that Mona and her fellow ghouls were behind everything so they could eat the fraternity brothers as part of their own hazing ritual.
• Serial Killer: The Cougher was allegedly one in life, and is teased as being a ghostly one who haunts his former home. The end proves that that last theory isn't true, since the Cougher's story was made up years ago, but there are killers who live in it.
• Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness: Arling and the other pledges speak like this to Les and other higher-ups, having been conditioned to treat them like royalty through Les' abuse.
• Sinister Sorority Sisters: There's a reason Delta Omega Alpha's initials spell "D.O.A.". They're an all-ghoul sorority!
• Southern Belle: Mona speaks in one of these accents.
• Strange Minds Think Alike: Les and Mona both keep walls of "Fame" and "Shame" for pledges who either make the cut or flunk initiations.
• Techno Wizard: Les' friend Sparks, who rigs the Cougher House with spooky sounds and rigged dummies to scare the pledges out.
• Toothbrush Floor Scrubbing: The pledges are seen doing this to Les' floor in the beginning of the episode. In briefs that say "Kick Me".
• Tragic Villain: The Cougher was supposedly noted to be a creepy hermit, sure, but he became a murderer when a mayor swindled him out of his own house so it could be given to a fraternity (of which he was a former member) when their house burned down, leading the Cougher to curse the place and commit suicide.
• Uncertain Doom: It's not stated if Mona and the rest of DOA killed the pledges that stayed downstairs or not. But it is highly likely that they're preparing to do so by the episode's end.
• Uncool Undies: The three pledges are seen scrubbing the floor with their own toothbrushes in nothing but socks and tighty-whities that say "Kick Me" on the seat.
• Wacky Fratboy Hijinx: Les has his techie friend Sparks rig the Cougher House with sounds and dummies to scare the pledge trio shitless for him and his brothers' amusement. It starts veering into dangerous territory when the pledges go missing.
  • Before that adventure begins, Gamma Delta has had a history of rather violent hazes, as president Tex Crandell almost lets it slip that the fraternity is on probation and could use a sister house to get that status revoked.
• Wham Shot: When the members of DOA step out of the darkness into the light, their faces reveal that they're flesh eating ghouls.

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Crypt Keeper: (shaking his head) Poor Les! I know they say that college costs an arm and a leg, but this is ridiculous! (cackles) Still, I think he'd have been happy to know he was part of one last food fright. (a skeletal arm hands a slip of paper to him) Ahh, I see we've reached a verdict. Members of the gory, do you fiend the defendant guilty or not guilty? (the camera pans over to the jury, revealing that they consist of skeletons hung from nooses) What do you know? A hung jury! (cackles)