"🎶Last niiiiight/I think we've seen this all befooorrre🎶"
"Think you've got good karma, eh? Then how come you're going to be watching another Hercules film? And the very first Hercules film, the one that started it all? (evil chuckle) Well, we all shine on, don't we, Mr. Robinson?"
—Dr. Forrester
Film watched: Hercules
The episode is available in the Gizmoplex here
, and on the MST3k YouTube channel here.
The Segments:
Prologue- It's Casual Day on the Satellite of Love. It's actually a little too casual, since nobody knows what to say.
Segment 1/Invention Exchange
- Dr. Forrester presents the Cellular Desk, which lets him take his paperwork and the chance to grill his employees (i.e. Frank) anywhere he goes. Joel offers Instant Karma, which, with a bit of water, offers fitting retribution for all actions good and bad.
Segment 2
- Feeling that the constellations of old are outdated, Servo demonstrate ideas for new, modernized interpretations of random groups of stars. A bitter Crow then suggests one of his own.
Segment 3
- Over Joel's bowl of cereal, he and the 'Bots ponder exactly how many members were in the band Hamilton, Joe Frank, and Reynolds.
Segment 4
- Playing Gene Rayburn and all the contestants of The Match Game, Crow puts on his one-robot show, "Give 'em Hell, Blank".
Segment 5
- Crow and Servo discuss what it would be like to have Amazons aboard the SOL, with the former anticipating them doing all their chores and the latter griping about how they'd leave their "girly things" everywhere. Joel tries to clarify their misconceptions by explaining that the Amazons were brave and noble warriors who didn't need men. The crew is suddenly visited by a pair of real-life Amazons, who have settled down as kindly Midwestern soccer moms in a van. In Deep 13, Frank puts on the Cellular Desk and mocks Dr. Forrester as revenge for the "performance review" he was given earlier, accidentally braining the doc in the process.
The Mystery Science Theater 3000 presentation of Hercules contains examples of:
- Achilles' Heel:Opening scroll: Even the greatest strength carries within it a measure of mortal weakness...
Tom Servo: My mortal weakness is cheesecake! - Amazon Brigade: Since this week's movie involves the original Greek amazons, Tom Servo and Crow discuss what it would be like to get conquered by the Amazons. And they completely miss the point: Tom complains that they would leave their nylons and curling irons all over the house, while Crow focuses on how great it would be for Amazons to do all his chores. Joel tries to set them straight, pointing out that the real Amazons were noble warriors. Then two real Amazons show up at the Satellite of Love, and they're nothing like anyone expected.Carol: It used to be a full-time thing, but now we just conquer men for charity. It's real real fun.
- Call-Back:
- The Ditz:[As the camera focuses on Iole]
Crow: I wonder what I'm thinking about. - Fictional Constellations: The subject of constellations-as-a-motif is the main discussion during the first host segment. The episode deconstructs the whole constellations-as-a-motif when Crow complains he doesn't see the figures of ancient legend in the night sky (save Orion, of course). Servo attempts to update the constellations to reflect "modern sensibilities," creating elaborate constructs such as "The Ham Sandwich," "The New Christy Minstrels," and, out of a mere eleven stars, "Picasso's Guernica." Frustrated, Crow comes back with a "modern" constellation of his own, consisting of two stars:Crow: (sarcastic) It's a pencil. The eraser's almost gone.
- Groin Attack:Crow: Ow! Right in the groinitological area.
Tom Servo: The groinular region. - Hulk Speak:Tom Servo: Duuuh, Herc head hurt. Where Herc? Who Herc?
- Karma Houdini: Despite J&tB's good karma, the Mads send 'em another "Hercules" motion picture, even though they said "Hercules & the Captive Women" would be the last. But they are just doing their job.
- Lame Pun Reaction:[Hercules whips a bunch of guards with his chains.]
Crow: This is a weird chain of events.
Tom Servo: Doh! - Laser-Guided Karma:
- The subject of Joel's invention exchange for the week: "Instant Karma". You just add water, and it forms a fitting reward or punishment for your actions! When Servo sends his whole allowance to Sally Struthers out of sympathy, he gets strawberry licorice. When Crow cleans up Tom's room (since Tom can't do it himself), Crow gets a Snickers bar. And when Servo stretches and pits Crow's Danskin, Servo's aunt takes him to a Michael Bolton concert.
- For the Mads' part of the invention exchange, Dr. Forrester invents the "cellular desk" and accidentally knocks TV's Frank unconscious with it. At the end of the episode, Frank uses the cellular desk and accidentally whacks Dr. F in the crotch.
- The Loins Sleep Tonight:Crow: Did they have any kids?
Tom Servo: Oh, no. Herc couldn't perform his husbandly duties, if you know what I mean. - Minnesota Nice: The duo of Amazons who drive by the Satellite of Love.Joel: Jeez, they seemed like somebody's moms or something.
- Nice Job Breaking It, Hero: At the climax, Hercules knocks out two supporting beams. As the palace collapses:Joel: Hey Herc! They just surrendered and gave us the palace.
- Shout-Out:
- Pelias mourns his departed son, Iphitus: "I love my dead Greek son!"
- In the third host segment, Joel is eating "Cap'n Ron Cereal".
- The Amazon dancers hold fruit in front of their breasts, causing the bots to start crooning the song from the Wonderful® Grapefruit commercial. They also re-use the "juicy lemon pulp" line, from the instructions for homemade contraceptive on Bronner Soap labels.
- [Trope Name]:Dr. Forrester: Yes Joel, insert perfunctory acknowledgement here.
- Waxing Lyrical: Considering Joel's invention exchange is instant karma, Dr. Forrester responds "Well we all shine on, don't we?"
- "Where Are They Now?" Epilogue: Parodied when Servo, during the closing credits, spins an elaborate account of Hercules and Iole's Not-So-Glamorous Ever After. note
