Title: Archaeology Today
Original Airdate: 17/11/1970
Guest starring: Carol Cleveland, Barbara Lindley
First, upcoming shows
And now for something completely different, Sport: an episode of Archaeology Today, an appeal for insanity, a man trying to exchange his wife, chicken gangsters, a dinner party, mosquito hunters, gossipy judges, gossipy housewives, and Ludwig van Beethoven besieged by distractions.
Tropes:
- Breaking the Fourth Wall: The two pepperpots notice the special effects leading into the "Beethoven's Mynah Bird" sketch:Mrs Entity: Ooh! What's happening?
Mrs Thing: It's all right, it's only a flashback. - Camp Gay: The "Poofy Judges" sketch.
- Continuity Nod: Spiny Norman, the gigantic hedgehog that was looking for Dinsdale Piranha in "Face the Press", shows up again, still looking for him.
- Human Ladder: "Archeology Today". When the television host attacks 6'5" Sir Robert, he puts Dr. Kastner on his shoulders so they'll be taller. Sir Robert then puts his assistant Danielle on top of his shoulders. After each pair puts a third person on top, they fight.
- Kavorka Man: The host of "Archaeology Today" keeps picking on one of his guests for being short and having bad posture (Terry Jones), compared to the praise he heaps on his other guest for being very tall and handsome (John Cleese); this eventually causes said guest to break down.Professor Lucien Kastner: All right, I'm only five foot ten. All right my posture is bad. All right I slump in my chair. But I've had more women than either of you two! I've had half of bloody Norway, that's what I've had!
- Names to Run Away from Really Fast: Mr. A-Sniveling-Little-Rat-Faced Git, played by Terry Jones who looks like it; then comes his wife Mrs. Dreary-Fat-Boring-Old Git, played by John Cleese in drag with his normal voice.
- Oddball in the Series: Has an extended satire of BBC promotional announcers for the intro, but does not have either the "It's" man or John Cleese's "and now for something completely different" guy.
- Once More, with Clarity: "The Gits" sketch is briefly repeated with a "nice version" of the sketch, where the characters last names are "Watson" instead of "Git". Carol Cleveland interrupts the sketch as a nun saying she preferred the dirty version before being knocked out by a boxer played by Gilliam.
- Precision F-Strike:Beethoven (John Cleese): Stuff the jam spoon!
- Standard Snippet: The ending of the "Beethoven and His Mynah Bird" sketch is accompanied by the recording of Jimmy Durante's "The Guy Who Found the Lost Chord".
- There Is No Kill Like Overkill: Hank and Roy Spim kill a mosquito with a shoulder-fired rocket and belt-fed machine gun, with a coup de grace from a Lanchester machine gun at point-blank range. They do it for sport.There is nothing more dangerous than a wounded mosquito.
- Vomit Indiscretion Shot: Mrs. Dreary-Fat-Boring-Old Git vomiting into her handbag.
- Who's on First?: The "Silly Doctor Sketch":Doctor: Next, please. Name?
Watson: Er, Watson.
Doctor: [writes it down] Mr Watson.
Watson: Ah, no, Doctor.
Doctor: Ah, Mr Doctor.
Watson: No, not Mr, Doctor.
Doctor: Oh, Doctor Doctor.
Watson: No, Doctor Watson.
Doctor: Oh, Doctor Watson Doctor.
Watson: Oh, just call me "darling".
Doctor: Hello, Mr Darling.
Watson: No, Doctor.
Doctor: Hello, Doctor Darling.
[whistle blows; sketch stops abruptly]
(That sketch has been abandoned)
