We're first introduced to the series with Father Ted asking Father Jack whether or not he feels like handling one of the weekend masses (naturally, Jack doesn't), followed by Father Dougal entering and turning out to have a spot of shaving cream on his face. His entire face. After he wipes it off, he tries to tempt Ted with the thought of going to Funland, a notoriously poor funfair that's visiting Craggy Island later that week, though Dougal's vivid descriptions of the "Spider Baby" — something that has the mind of a baby, but the body of a spider — causes Ted to point out that Dougal might well be mixing up dreams and reality again. After Dougal tries switching on the TV (which only gets the TV destroyed courtesy of an empty bottle thrown by Jack), Ted gets a phone call from TV producer Terry MacNamee, who wants to feature Ted on his TV show Faith of Our Fathers. Ted eagerly agrees, and "helpfully" informs Terry that he's the only priest who lives on Craggy Island.
Later that week, Terry and his crew arrive on Craggy Island, and Ted advises them to get help from Tom, the island's resident crazy guy, to find their way to The Field, the least rocky place on the island. After much effort forcing Jack into his wheelchair, Ted has Dougal take him on a walk, while he sneaks off to The Field. However, Ted is dismayed to find that Funland has set up camp there, and even more alarmed to find Dougal and Jack riding on Funland's poor approximation of a Merry-go-Round.
Dougal persuades Ted to have a tarot reading, and Ted is naturally very concerned when three "Death" cards show up, especially since there's only supposed to be one in each pack. To add to their troubles, Jack goes missing, and Ted eventually finds him sat on a seemingly innocent bench. However, this bench turns out to be part of "The Crane of Death", and before they knows it, Ted and Jack are hoisted high up in the air. Dougal, meanwhile, is found by Terry and crew, and thanks to Ted's earlier claim to be the only priest on Craggy Island, they mistake Dougal for Ted. The real Ted is naturally horrified by this development, and tries to figure out a way to get down off the bench, but Jack's angrily demanding a drink upsets the bench's balance and sends Ted plummeting to the ground below.
That evening, the interview with "Father Ted Crilly" appears on the now-repaired TV, while the real Ted, bandaged-up in a full-body cast, moans in despair as Dougal proceeds to talk about how he doesn't actually believe in God, and tells viewers of the mysterious Spider Baby. Jack happens to wake up and, annoyed by the interruption, lobs an empty bottle at the TV again.
Tropes featured in this episode:
- The Alcoholic: Surprisingly enough, this is actually only inferred rather than outright shown to be the case for Jack for most of the episode. Outside of the scene where he's lured into his chair with a bottle of wine, and then when he's showed with a load of empty bottles (and an empty container of Castrol motor oil) near the end, he just appears to be very cranky and violent.
- And Another Thing...: Mrs. Doyle comes into the room to give the priests tea, which leads to Ted getting scalded and Jack throwing the tea cup at her. Then she remembers that she was meant to tell Ted that Terry MacNamee called about his impending trip to the island.
- Blatant Lies:
- Dougal's excuse for him and Jack being at funland during the time when he was supposed to be taking Jack for a walk: the cliffs were closed today. When Ted asks how they could be closed, he amends it and says that they were gone.
- Ted claims that Terry MacNamee was coming to fix the television when asked about him.
- Cloudcuckoolander: All three of the main characters asides from Ted are quickly established to be this, although Dougal is probably the worst.
- Crappy Carnival: Craggy Island Funland includes such attractions as "Freak Pointing", an ordinary ladder, and a cat spinning on a record player.
- Creator Cameo: Graham Linehan makes a non-speaking cameo appearance, goading the "fierce man" on the stepladder at Funland. Arthur Mathews also makes a cameo as the voice on the Funland intercom; the voice Mathews adopts here is the one he used while playing "Father Ted" in a stand-up routine he performed prior to the series' creation.
- Curtain Camouflage: Ted hides behind a curtain when on the phone with a TV producer to hide from Father Jack.
- Early-Installment Weirdness:
- Jack has very short hair rather than his later trademark messy hair. There's also more humour about the island itself. The tone is a little more like a regular sitcom than what would follow.
- Ted seems to expect Father Jack to do Mass. Judging from what we see of Father Jack after it's not only a strange thing to expect but letting Jack do a Mass would be disastrous.
- Ted announces that he'll take on all the Masses with Jack declining to do them, seemingly ignoring Dougal's presence. Though it isn't long before his unwillingness to trust Dougal with doing one becomes understandable.
- Epic Fail: Dougal enters the room with his face completely covered in shaving cream. When Ted points it out to him, he reacts with surprise since he didn't even shave that morning.
- Establishing Character Moment: As the first episode of the series, each of the four main characters naturally gets one or two:
- Ted's is when he's unsuccessfully trying to persuade Jack to do mass, and then points out Dougal's shaving foam-covered face, establishing him as the Straight Man of the series. However, he's shown to be Not So Above It All when he lies about there being no other priests on the island, and then blows off Tom's claim to have killed a man because he's more excited about being on the TV.
- Dougal is well and truly established as a Cloud Cuckoolander in the first few minutes, due to his not noticing the shaving foam on his face, and then the whole discussion with Ted about dreams and reality.
- Jack's uncooperative personality is hinted at when he refuses to do any priestly work, and his violent temper is established when he destroys the TV with a bottle.
- Mrs. Doyle's obsessive need to give people drinks is shown firstly when she forces some tea on Ted despite his being busy trying to fix the TV (and obliviously pours hot tea all over Ted's hand when he tries to refuse), and then merrily gives a cup to Jack despite his foul-mouthed refusal.
- Failed a Spot Check: Ted failed to realise he and Jack were up in the air until he went to stand up.
- Global Ignorance: Ted's directions to Terry.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: Ted's lie that he's the only priest on Craggy Island means that the news crew has no reason to believe that the first priest they meet at Funland isn't him.
- Meaningful Name: The Crane of Death got that name because someone was killed on it the previous year. Ted nearly gets added to the body count, too.
- Precision F-Strike: Technically it's with "feck" instead of the other f-word, but Jack delivers one nonetheless:Mrs. Doyle: Now, what would you say to a cup?
Father Jack: FECK OFF, CUP! - Shout-Out: Dougal pretends to be presenting Top of the Pops after being given the television frame by Ted.
- Tarot Troubles: Lampshaded; Ted somehow gets three Trump 13 (Death) cards, despite the fortune teller pointing out there's only supposed to be one per pack. As it turns out, the cards accurately foreshadow the accident he's going to have on the Crane of Death.
