Helen and Jake start worrying about Daria and Quinn's future and push the girls into taking a college prep course. One assignment for the course is to visit a college, so the whole family goes to Middleton, Jake and Helen's alma mater. The girls and their tour guide, a college girl named Heather, get separated from their parents, and
Hilarity Ensues when Quinn tries to join a sorority and Daria gets a job writing the students' essays.
This episode provides examples of:
- Amoral Attorney: Discussed.
Daria: My mom wouldn't let me keep [the money]. She said it was wrong to encourage cheaters and to profit from them.
Jane: So, she's giving up being a lawyer?
Daria: I asked her that, and I'm sure some day we'll once again be on speaking terms.
- Comically Missing the Point: Kevin doesn't register that he wasn't supposed to enjoy being stripped naked, covered in molasses, and left in an empty field in the middle of the night.
- Deadly Prank: Some Middleton boys start throwing stuff at Jake from their dorm window, escalating to tossing out a bathroom sink and then a piece of the building itself. Thankfully Jake moved out of the way or he would've been dead on impact.
- Do Wrong, Right: When Jake finds out Daria is selling papers to college students.
Jake: And she made you pay in cash.
Student: That's right.
Jake (smirking): Good girl.
- Dumbass Has a Point: Even Jake knows better than to accept checks from college students, and is proud of Daria only taking cash payments for writing papers.
- Education Mama: The episode begins with the Morgendorffers visiting some friends with a three-year-old daughter. They've already bought her My First S.A.T. Study Guide, prompting Helen and Jake to push Daria and Quinn into the college prep course.
- Everyone Has Standards: Quinn surprisingly shows she has limits to how hard she wants to party. She'll eagerly direct a bunch of frat boys on how to play a drinking game, to the point she even gets crowned "Keg Queen," but she won't drink herself.
- Exact Words: Daria never separated from the tour guide... who then took her to her dorm and introduced Daria to the essay business.
- Failed a Spot Check: Daria returns home to discover Quinn and their parents ecstatic that Quinn somehow got into "Manatee College." They apparently stopped reading after it mentioned Quinn got in, to which Daria reveals the "college" has no courses and is selling time-shares for several thousand dollars.
- Fantasy Twist: In Daria's Imagine Spot about college life, she imagines a school administrator promoting her to teach at their Parisian campus in her first week. However, it turns out that he just did it so that he could use her dorm to carry out affairs with the female students.
Daria: How come even in my fantasies everyone's a jerk?
- Kevin begins to fantasize about college, except all the college football players are a lot bigger than him. He shakes his head and restarts the dream with himself taller and more fit.
- Hidden Disdain Reveal: Kevin and Brittany have fantasies about college life that include both of them coldly ditching the other. Kevin snarks and laughs about his childish high school girlfriend, while Brittany gleefully has a desperate Kevin dragged away by security guards.
- Hypocrite: Played for Laughs when Daria reveals Helen made her stop writing papers for college students, stating it was wrong to profit off dishonesty and such. Daria then asked if that meant Helen was going to quit being a lawyer, and apparently they still aren't on speaking terms.
- Imagine Spot: Daria, Jane, Quinn, Kevin and Brittany each have one about what college will be like.
- Loan Shark: The bursar advises Jake to borrow money from a business that's implied to be a front for the Mafia.
- Mirror Character: Daria explaining to some of the students she was hanging out with over how to write their papers has some comparisons to Quinn explaining to a bunch of frat boys how they can play a drinking game. Daria begins a somewhat lucrative enterprise, Quinn gets crowned Keg Queen.
- Naked People Trapped Outside: According to Kevin, on his college trip some frat boys stripped him, covered him in molasses and left him outside in the middle of the night. He seems to find this funny.
- Not So Above It All: Helen initially finds it amusing when a frat boy asks for her panties as part of a prank, but then gets pissed off when he implies Helen's fat.
- Out of Focus: We only see the Morgendorffers' college trip; we hear a bit about the other characters', but absolutely nothing about Jane's.
- Stealth Insult: The frat boy who wants Helen's underwear for a fraternity prank pretty much says he wants them because he thinks they're big, i.e., because of how big Helen is.
- Too Kinky to Torture: Played with. Kevin's simply too stupid to understand he was being hazed by frat boys and found it fun when they stripped him and abandoned him in a field.
- Wacky Fratboy Hijinx: One Fratbro asks Helen for her underwear, which his fraternity wants to use as a flag. Kevin also alludes to this (see Naked People Trapped Outside).
