Glazier: I'll get crackin', then.
Sharon: No, you get mendin'. We've done the crackin'.
— Sharon Theodopolopodous trying to get a Glazier to fix her window.
- Date First Aired: 01/10/1994
Dorien is recounting to Tracey about the first aid course that she's doing with a man named Stephen. Apparently, Dorien wants to give back to the community, although she admits that she's only doing it out of a desire for the most handsome instructor that she could find. Tracey soon comes to realize that she's not contributing to society.
At the prison, Darryl reveals that their going ahead with his "home-leave assessment", meaning that he might be coming home for a bit. However, they need a probation officer to make sure that he's in good hands, so Darryl wants Sharon out of the way. Soon, she decides to do a phone-in hosted by a man named Robbie Vincent to air her feelings on Darryl. Unfortunately, it's the bereavement phone-in and she ends up lying that she's doing first-aid and letting them know that Darryl's dead. Soon, Robbie Vincent asks her to come on again, this time to talk about alcoholism. Unfortunately, it gets worse and they think that she has been speaking to the spirit of Darryl. Making matters worse, Tracey's is made to do a phone-in on life after death. Soon, she can't take it anymore and is made to reveal the truth. Oh, and the probation officer has come in on Dorien reviving the glazier and Tracey insulting him.
Tropes in this Episode:
- As Himself: Robbie Vincent.
- Bandage Mummy: Dorien is completely covered in bandages as part of a first-aid course.
- Celebrity Crush: Dorien once tried to have an affair with Nick Ross.
- Chekhov's Skill: Dorien spends all episode doing first aid training, then finally gets her chance to use it when the glazier passes out.
- Coincidental Broadcast: Sharon manages to hear in on Tracey's call-in with Robbie Vincent at the same time she has her radio on.
- Continuity Nod:
- When Robbie Vincent asks Tracey if Darryl's "gone to a better place", Sharon (listening on the radio) remarks that "High Down Nick's much nicer than Maidstone".
- Sharon alludes to Dorien having reached the menopause.
- Deadpan Snarker: Sharon's response to Dorien saying that she sounds stressed:Dorien: You sound stressed.Sharon: (Beat) Very astute, Dor. Well spotted. I'm ready to pass out!
- Dead Person Conversation: Thanks to a poor choice of words, Robbie Vincent and the listeners is led to believe that Tracey has been having a conversation with her 5 years dead husband.
- The Ghost: Stephen, who teaches Dorien first aid.
- Happily Married: Nick Ross is, much to Dorien's disappointment.
- Missing Steps Plan: Chris' plan involving home leave apparently has a fourth step for if things go wrong, although he admits that he hasn't thought out the details of that step.Chris: An' if not, I'll be ready with phase four.Darryl: Which is?Chris: I dunno, I 'aven't worked it out yet.
- I Need a Freaking Drink:
- Dorien, exhausted by her first aid course, comes into the sisters' house needing a drink.
- Sharon goes to get a drink when she realises that Tracey has admitted she isn't a medium.
- Tracey takes a drink from her champagne upon realising that she's just insulted the probation officer.
- The Inspector Is Coming: A probation officer is coming to Dalentrace to see if Darryl should be allowed home leave, only for him to walk in on Tracey insulting him.
- Irony: Tracey is gifted champagne for her piece on the dangers of alcoholism.
- New Job Episode: Tracey begins to work as an agony aunt for The Robbie Vincent Show.
- Noodle Incident: Dorien once phoned up a phone-in program on Radio 4 which featured Nick Ross and was disappointed when she found that he was Happily Married.
- One-Shot Character: Angela, Robbie Vincent, Eddie and Elizabeth.
- Parting-Words Regret: Elizabeth's last words to Gerry before his death were that of anger, and she's desperate to know if his spirit has forgiven her.
- Psychic Powers: Tracey is believed to have them after she mentions she was talking to Darryl, who she had previously claimed was dead for five years.
- Reports of My Death Were Greatly Exaggerated: Tracey decides to go on a radio show hosted by Robbie Vincent to put out her feelings on Darryl. Problem is that its the phone-in on bereavement, leading him to believe that Darryl had been dead for five years when in reality he had been in jail the whole time. Tracey continues the charade for a bit until she is forced to admit the truth when he tries to get her to do a piece on life after death.
- Right Behind You: Tracey does not like the probation officer and calls him nosy, interfering, poxy, smug, and in for her. Too bad that she says this with him right behind her.
- Shout-Out:
- Sharon wears a jumper with Bugs Bunny on it.
- Tracey compares Dorien to Florence Nightingale.
- Tracey frequently listens to The Robbie Vincent Show, and becomes an agony aunt for it.
- Sharon compares Eddie to Oliver Twist because he keeps asking for more pensioners' breakfasts.
- Sharon sarcastically calls Tracey "Mother Teresa".
- Sharon tells Dorien that Tracey is Chigwell's answer to Claire Rayner.
- Dorien recalls trying to hook up with Nick Ross.
- When Chris applies for home leave, he asks to be sent to either Ulrika Jonsson or Linda Lusardi's home as phase one of his plan.
- When Sharon tries to pop a champagne cork, Tracey warns her that she isn't Nigel Mansell.
- When talking about her supposed Psychic Powers, Tracey remarks that the staff on The Robbie Vincent Show think she's Doris Stokes.
- The Bishop of Durham calls up on The Robbie Vincent Show.
- Something We Forgot: Stephen forgot he left Dorien covered in bandages at the first aid course one night.
- Status Quo Is God: Tracey gives up her job on The Robbie Vincent Show by the end of the episode.
- Take That!:
- After hearing Dorien is doing a first aid course, she mutters "Watch out, Virginia Bottomley".
- Dorien looks down on Sharon for reading The Sun.
- Just the thought of Danny Baker disgusts Dorien.
- The Voice: Angela, Robbie Vincent and Elizabeth are only heard as voices on the radio.
- Titled After the Song: The episode is named after the song "First Time Caller" by Juice Newton.
- Title Drop: Tracey goes on the radio with Robbie Vincent:Tracey: Hello Robbie, I-I'm a bit nervous actually. I'm a first-time caller.
