Title: The Dentist
Directed by: Noam Pitlik
Written by: Frank Dungan and Jeff Stein
Air Date: December 27, 1979
Previous: The DNA Story
Next: People's Court
Guest Starring: Jenny O'Hara, Arthur Malet, Oliver Clark, Estelle Omens
"The Dentist" is the 11th episode of the sixth season of Barney Miller.
A Ms. Omens comes into the squad room and reports that she was felt up by her dentist while she was under anesthesia. Barney arranges for the temporary transfer of a female detective, Holly Scofield, from Manhattan South. Holly is icily formal and standoffish to everyone, which makes it funny when she comes back from the dentist's high as a kite from the anesthesia and makes a sexual advance towards Captain Miller. It turns out that the dentist, Dr. Gesslin, didn't do anything wrong with Holly, but when he's caught red-handed molesting his next client, he's arrested.
The second wacky case involves one Mr. Creighton, a musician with a rather unique talent: he plays "music" by making farting noises with his hands. Mr. Creighton, charged with making a public disturbance by playing at a restaurant, starts teaching the skill to Wojo, much to Barney's irritation.
In personal news, Harris has gotten the design for the cover of "Blood on the Badge" from his publisher. He isn't happy with the lurid cover illustration.
Tropes:
- Aren't You Going to Ravish Me?: Det. Scofield is upset and indeed is offended when Dr. Gesslin does not molest her, complaining about how she put in the effort and made herself pretty. (She's also high when she says this.). The story ends when she asks him why and he says he never feels up a patient on the first visit.Det. Scofield: You had your chance, pervert!
- Blowing a Raspberry: Mr. Creighton defends the seriousness of his craft, saying "This is art!". After Wojciehowicz responds by blowing a raspberry, Mr. Creighton says "Buddy, that's pretty good!".
- Comically Missing the Point: When Barney's patience finally runs out during Mr. Creighton's performance of the "Blue Danube" waltz and Barney finally yells for him to stop, Mr. Creighton says "Oh, you don't like classical? I can do show tunes!"
- Distinguished Gentleman's Pipe: Everybody makes fun of Harris, who does not smoke a pipe, for posing with a pipe for the back cover author's photo of his book.Wojo: You don't smoke a pipe!
- Dude, She's Like in a Coma: A dentist is arrested for molesting his female patients while they're under anesthesia.
- Everything Is an Instrument: Mr. Creighton, who plays music by making farting noises with his hands, and takes his skill very very seriously, describing himself as "an artist." (The farting hand music was provided by a man named John Twomey, who made a name for himself in the 1970s doing this for an act.)
- Ice Queen: Detective Scofield is coldly formal and businesslike when she shows up to the 12th, alienating the other detectives. This of course sets up the gag where she comes back from the dentist tripping balls.
- Pun: Dietrich can't resist describing a dentist molesting his clients as "oral hijinks." (Get it? "Oral hygiene"?)
- Punctuated! For! Emphasis!: How Harris, when he first comes into the squad room, tells everybody about his problems with the book. "I! Have! Had it!".
- Unreveal Angle: Although the back cover illustration with the silly photo of Harris smoking a pipe is shown, the front cover that has him so upset is not revealed to the audience.
