Quotes / What the Hell Is That Accent?

Comedy

"James Bond": You couldn't come and sit up here in the front, could you? [...]
"SMERSH agent": No I weel not, Meester Buund. I will seet in de buck, heuur.
"James Bond": ...Where exactly are you from, by the way?
"SMERSH agent": Dun't yoo take de piss out of me, I will come up in de front and talk to you, now why dun't you— I am a SMERSH agent, I have a vuice sintesizer in my throoat. Ah c'n do eny accent ye c'n theenk eeov. Unfortunately I've lost the instructions et the m'm'nt... and my voicebox is stuck on 'shop demonstration.' Which is a bit uv uh bummuhr.

— Suzy Eddie Izzard, "Definite Article"

Fan Works

If we were to describe the accent phonetically to you, it would be nearly impossible to do so. However, the closest approximation that we can make out is partly French, partly Russian, and partly uncategorizeable.

—Pokémon Opal and Garnet, on Clopin's accent (which is the same as that of the gypsy leader he was named after)

"Imagine, if you will," as he almost guides her eyes to an unknown horizon, "A British mother, with an Italian parent, raised in America. Imagine her accent. This is his mother. This is who teaches him English. And then we go to school, and learn more English, from people who can't speak English properly."

A trainwreck. That is the imagining. An absolute trainwreck of an accent, which is exactly what Jotaro sounds like. Suddenly, she understands.

— And Then They Were Roommates., chapter 11

Film — Live-Action

Detective Garfield: You talk funny, Nash. Where you from?
"Russel Nash": Lots of different places.

— Highlander

Literature

Mr Shadwell's accent was unplaceable. It careered around Britain like a milk race. Here a mad Welsh drill sergeant, there a High Kirk elder who'd just seen someone doing something on a Sunday, somewhere between them a dour Daleland shepherd, or bitter Somerset miser. It didn't matter where the accent went; it didn't get any nicer.

—Good Omens

Live-Action TV

Ryan: (supposedly Spanish accent) Dance for me again!
Kathy: (weird Franco-Scandinavian accent) No, I...I do not dance for the likes of you.
Ryan: (slipping into Italian) You're-a from Canada, aren't you?
Kathy: (gives up) Yes, and my mother's from Sweden.

—Whose Line Is It Anyway?, for a game supposedly set in Mexico

Rose: Och, aye! I've been... oot and aboot!
The Doctor: No, don't do that.
Rose: Hoots mon!
The Doctor: No, really, don't. Really.

— Doctor Who, "Tooth and Claw"

"My mother was an Austrian-Finnish-Swede and my father was Dutch-Italian-Icelandic, hence my unique accent."

—Snorri Agnarsson, Maniac (2018)

Podcasts

Johnny: Everybody betray me! I fed up with this world!
Kevin Murphy: I'm going back to Brazil-a-Romani-Slovakia! ...stan.

—Rifftrax on The Room

Radio

Douglas: So Arthur, I've just realised: you're half Australian... That certainly explains a lot about the relentless cheeriness.
Arthur: Yeah! And it's also woi oi kin do sich a good Orstralian aksint!
Douglas: Two things, Arthur: Australian accents aren't genetic, and you can't do one.

— Cabin Pressure, "St. Petersburg"

Video Games

Rouxls Kaard: Chips Ahoyeth, Landlubbers! Arrrrrr-t thou ready-eth to visiteth Davith Jones' Lockre???
Ralsei: Could... Could you NOT speak with more than one accent?

— Deltarune

"He's one of the World's Saviours, and appears to be Bartholio's closest ally, but not much else is known about him. He speaks in a bizarre accent; I have honestly no idea what it's supposed to be and I bet you don't either."

— Vennie Vidi Ae-Vicci's character blurb, MARDEK

Mouse: Squeeeeak squeak.
(Weh've been waitin' a bloody long 'arry Lime all pat wiv yew aht on yeh toblerone.)
Mouse: "Squeak?"
(Eh? Izzatchew, Alfie? Wheh've ya been wivaht sennin' a dicky bird? Ya dihn't come by fo' New Yeah's or Crackah Night, so yeh Grandmum an' I 'ave been all jack. So, wotcheh? Yeh mus' be bleedin' 'ank Marvin, eh? 'Eah's summadat Nut Bread fo' yeh.)

— Mother 3

"What do you mean, what kind of accent is dis? It's a troll accent! I swear, ja makin' me crazy."

—Rokhan, Warcraft III: The Frozen Throne

Web Original

"Her place of origin actually varies from one line of dialogue to the next, which must be a paperwork nightmare."

— The Tough Pigs: My Week With Christmas Vacation on Mr. Willowby's Christmas Tree

Web Video

"So then, all of a sudden, focus switches to some characters that sound like a couple of Australians that got concussions."

— JonTron reviews The Howling II

Jake: Actually, my brother and I were both born in the UK.
Jeremy This line was definitely inserted to explain Gerard Butler's dialect in this movie after it was screened.

— CinemaSins, "Everything Wrong with Geostorm"

"I have no idea what ethnicity you are anymore."

— Let's Play: Quest for Glory I (So You Want To Be A Hero) PART 4

"...I've lived in Penang, Norway, Aberdeen, Falkirk, er, Hull, Venezuela, Colombia, Shanghai, Milton Keynes, and more recently, Liverpool and Bath. So, I've grown up surrounded by a wide variety of accents, as a result my accent now changes on a daily basis, often mimicking whoever I'm around. In all honesty, I have zero control over this thing, I really have no idea which accent is currently operating. Is this English? I don't know! Is this English?"

—Kim Richards, answering fanmail

Villager: Before you die, tell me what your accent was.
Gary Oldman: Never!

—Bum Reviews: Red Riding Hood

"What the f**k accent is that?! It's like every Asian comedian's impression of their mom combined into one voice..."

— AnimatedJames, Bronies React, "Slice of Life"

"I like the nationalities in this game. There was, like, a Russian Spanish person, and then a Chinese Frenchman."

—- Bro Team Pill, on Raven's Cry

Ethan: What part of Ireland am I from?
Seán: God fucking knows at this point.

—Unus Annus, 2 Men 200 Accents

I owe a coke to whoever can tell me what accent this is.

—Remy Raccoon on Clay, Everything Right and Wrong With Spyro 3: Year of the Dragon Reignited

Katya: Have you heard a Swedish person talk ever?

Trixie: It's irrelevant. I'm telling them how to talk.

About Trixie's "Swedish" accent, UNHhhh

Real Life

The sillier the story, the wilder the villain's accent. The principal delight of Blown Away was to hear Tommy Lee Jones impersonate an Irish bomber, with a voice that suggested an Australian who had been to finishing school in Puerto Rico.

— Christopher Tookey

Sometimes she's from Scotland, sometimes she's from New York, you just can't tell.

—Suzanne Moore, on Anne Hathaway's (supposedly Yorkshire) accent in One Day

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