Quotes / The Beard

"People think you're gay now, Finn. Do you know what that makes me? That makes me your BIG, GAY BEARD."

— Quinn Fabray, Glee

I mean there are those guys who will buy a cow, but then on the sidelines, total matador.

—John Mulaney on how people often think he's gay, "The Comeback Kid" special

Fifth Doctor: Does he still have that rubbish beard?

Tenth Doctor: No, no beard this time — well, a wife.

— Doctor Who, "Time Crash"

Penny: Will you just play along until my dad leaves?

Leonard: Hold on. You actually want me to deceive your father with some sham, play-acting and kissing 'cause I'm GOOD with that!

— The Big Bang Theory

"The U.S. Mint also offers coins featuring the First Spouses! Impress friends and amuse surly newspaper vendors, who certainly won't beat you ferociously when you try to pay them with currency featuring images of Lucy Hayes and Ida McKinley, celebrating such achievements as 'organizing the first White House Easter Egg Roll' and 'crocheting slippers for charity'! So obsessed is the mint with the First Spouse series that they didn't let bachelor president James Buchanan disrupt their flow. They posthumously married him to the abstract concept of Liberty."

— Cracked, "5 Sites That prove the U.S. Government Sucks at the Internet"

She's got a famous boyfriend
They go out in style
She makes him look hetero
He helps her profile

— The Divine Comedy, "Diva Lady"

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