Robin: And even though I just barely had sex, it still counts.
Lily: What do you mean, "just barely"?
Robin: Well, he didn't dive all the way into the pool, but he splashed around in the shallow end.
Lily: Then you didn't lose your virginity to him! "Just barely" doesn't count.
Robin: Yes it does.
Lily: No it doesn't.
Marshall: Yes it does.
Lily: No it doesn't, it doesn't count, end of story!
Barney: Why, Lily Aldrin, you saucy little harlot, could it be that before Marshall took a swim, someone else tested the water?
Lily: What do you mean, "just barely"?
Robin: Well, he didn't dive all the way into the pool, but he splashed around in the shallow end.
Lily: Then you didn't lose your virginity to him! "Just barely" doesn't count.
Robin: Yes it does.
Lily: No it doesn't.
Marshall: Yes it does.
Lily: No it doesn't, it doesn't count, end of story!
Barney: Why, Lily Aldrin, you saucy little harlot, could it be that before Marshall took a swim, someone else tested the water?
"Look, lad, legend and time-established Lore older than the hills has nothing to say about women who are, shall I hint, experienced in other ways, but completely innocent of any deeper involvement with men. She met the criteria for unicorn-wrangling. She qualified. That's what the old story calls for. And while the creature was trying to work out whether she was legitimate or not, she slipped silver over it. Clever, clever, girl!"
— Mustrum Ridcully, The Discworld Tarot
(a Discworld fic)
(a Discworld fic)