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Comic Books
"I have been asked to make it clear that if you lose and find yourself unable to cover your losses, Mister Grey's representatives will — and I quote — "feed you your own testicles." I was given to understand that Mister Grey was not speaking metaphorically."
— Marshall, Hellblazer: Wheels of Chance, Systems of Control
Jon: Here Garfield, have a kitty treat.
Garfield: [munching on the treat] (This tastes like a dead mouse!)
Jon: [holding up the box] It's their new flavor... "Rodent Ranch".
Garfield: (Get the mop, I'm gonna blow.)
Garfield: [munching on the treat] (This tastes like a dead mouse!)
Jon: [holding up the box] It's their new flavor... "Rodent Ranch".
Garfield: (Get the mop, I'm gonna blow.)
— Garfield From the Trash Bin: Rescued Rejects and Outrageous Outtakes
Film — Animation
Puss in Boots: You are no bounty hunter. You are...
The Wolf: Death. And I don't mean it metaphorically, or rhetorically, or poetically or theoretically or in any other fancy way. I'm Death. Straight. Up.
The Wolf: Death. And I don't mean it metaphorically, or rhetorically, or poetically or theoretically or in any other fancy way. I'm Death. Straight. Up.
Film — Live-Action
Juggernaut: I'm going to rip you in half now.
Deadpool: [laughs] That is such a Juggernaut thing to say!
[Juggernaut rips Deadpool in half]
Deadpool: [laughs] That is such a Juggernaut thing to say!
[Juggernaut rips Deadpool in half]
"When someone says 'We have people everywhere', you expect it to be hyperbole. Lots of people say that. Florists use that expression. It doesn't mean there's somebody working for them inside the bloody room!"
— M (after The Mole inside the bloody room is revealed), Quantum of Solace
Literature
Aly: Have we people at Kanodang?
Ulasim: My dear, we have people everywhere.
Aly: Working inside Kanodang? Not prisoners, but jailers? Cooks?
Ulasim: Everywhere means everywhere.
Ulasim: My dear, we have people everywhere.
Aly: Working inside Kanodang? Not prisoners, but jailers? Cooks?
Ulasim: Everywhere means everywhere.
— Trickster's Duet, by Tamora Pierce
They claim that the services asked of them by the Emperor were set down in lifetime contracts by previous generations, who assumed the contracts would be terminated upon the Emperor’s death. When I pointed out that his primary title is the Emperor Undying and that this was a crime of assumption the princess called me a number of names I will not reproduce here.
— The Locked Tomb: "As Yet Unsent"
Live-Action TV
Lily: When it all goes down in flames- and I don't mean that figuratively. I expect there to be actual flames.
[cut to Ted sitting on the sidewalk where all of his personal belongings have been burned]
Future Ted: And there was.
[cut to Ted sitting on the sidewalk where all of his personal belongings have been burned]
Future Ted: And there was.
— How I Met Your Mother, "Bad Crazy"
Kara: Lie to me again and I'll drop a mountain on your head.
Mon-El: Figuratively?
Kara: Geologically.
Mon-El: Figuratively?
Kara: Geologically.
"Just give me all the bacon and eggs you have. Wait, wait. I'm worried what you just heard was, "Give me a lot of bacon and eggs." What I said was, "Give me all the bacon and eggs you have". Do you understand?"
— Ron Swanson, Parks and Recreation
Radio
Arthur: Do you think we can trust him?
Ford: Myself, I'd trust him to the ends of the Earth.
Arthur: And how far is that?
Ford: About twelve minutes away.
Ford: Myself, I'd trust him to the ends of the Earth.
Arthur: And how far is that?
Ford: About twelve minutes away.
Video Games
Duke: I'll rip your head off and shit down your neck!
[one boss fight later, he rips the monster's head off, unbuckles his pants, sits down on the neck stump, pulls out a newspaper, and starts whistling]
[one boss fight later, he rips the monster's head off, unbuckles his pants, sits down on the neck stump, pulls out a newspaper, and starts whistling]
Hayden Montag: It has been said that there is a skeleton in every closet here in Innsmouth. That is simply not true. They were laid into the very foundation walls. The basement might bleed if you chipped beneath the plaster.
Carter: That's a figure of speech, right?
Annabel Usher: I'm sorry, Carter.
Carter: Oh my god, have you never heard of a white lie?!
Carter: That's a figure of speech, right?
Annabel Usher: I'm sorry, Carter.
Carter: Oh my god, have you never heard of a white lie?!
Web Animation
Omni-Man: I'm going to feed you your own heart.
Homelander: Hahaha, shit! That was a great lin— [gets punched by Omni-Man]
[fast-forward to the end of the fight, where Omni-Man tears Homelander's jaw off its hinges and rips out his heart]
Omni-Man: Remember what I promised you...?
[Omni-Man shoves Homelander's heart into his distended mouth]
Omni-Man: Now, swallow.
Homelander: Hahaha, shit! That was a great lin— [gets punched by Omni-Man]
[fast-forward to the end of the fight, where Omni-Man tears Homelander's jaw off its hinges and rips out his heart]
Omni-Man: Remember what I promised you...?
[Omni-Man shoves Homelander's heart into his distended mouth]
Omni-Man: Now, swallow.
Webcomics
"My parents were fishermen. When I was a girl, I stood right here and leaned to clean the fish they had caught. I'm telling you this so that you know... when I say that if you take one more step, I will gut you like the Catch of the Day... it is not hyperbole!"
— Lien, The Order of the Stick, the Trope Namer
CG: I WASN'T JOKING WHEN I SAID I WAS YOUR GOD, LIKE THAT WASN'T JUST A LOT OF BRAVADO AND USELESS PISSING AROUND.
CG: I AM LITERALLY RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR EXISTENCE.
CG: WE BEAT THE GAME YOU ARE PLAYING AND CREATED YOUR UNIVERSE.
CG: I AM LITERALLY RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR EXISTENCE.
CG: WE BEAT THE GAME YOU ARE PLAYING AND CREATED YOUR UNIVERSE.
— Karkat Vantas, Homestuck
Web Original
And when I say “torturing”, I mean we get… lovely lines like this one:
“There was something perversely theraputic [sic] about the feeling of my claws rending Ash's flesh and tearing him to ribbons […]”.
“There was something perversely theraputic [sic] about the feeling of my claws rending Ash's flesh and tearing him to ribbons […]”.
— guardians_song, Introductory Post to the Cori Falls MSTs
Web Video
"I'm going to have to bring out the big gun! Which is literally a big gun!"
— Melvin, Marik Plays Bloodlines
"You know, when the villain says something like "taking candy from a baby", it should probably be an insult, because it isn't, and it's... it's supposed to make you feel less than what you actually are, it's supposed to demean you. But this really is like taking candy from a baby! We fell over, we landed on the floor, he picked it up and he LEFT!"
— Tear Of Grace, on a Knuckles fight in Sonic Adventure DX
Western Animation
Dipper: Guys, in case you've already forgotten, Pacifica Northwest is the worst — and that's not just jealously talking. I'd say that to her face.
[opens door to reveal Pacifica]
Pacifica: I need your help.
Dipper: ...You're the worst. [slams door]
[opens door to reveal Pacifica]
Pacifica: I need your help.
Dipper: ...You're the worst. [slams door]
— Gravity Falls, "Northwest Mansion Mystery"
Adam: But I just won the election!
Henry: Yeah, you won. That's why we have to challenge you for dominance. It's an animal thing.
Adam: [to Jake] Why didn't you tell me this could happen?
Jake: I told you you'd get beaten if you ran for office.
Adam: I didn't know you meant like this!
Jake: Well, it looks like you'll just have to take your monkey friend a little more literally in the future! [holds up a stick]
Adam: If I have a future!
Henry: Yeah, you won. That's why we have to challenge you for dominance. It's an animal thing.
Adam: [to Jake] Why didn't you tell me this could happen?
Jake: I told you you'd get beaten if you ran for office.
Adam: I didn't know you meant like this!
Jake: Well, it looks like you'll just have to take your monkey friend a little more literally in the future! [holds up a stick]
Adam: If I have a future!
— My Gym Partner's a Monkey, "Political Animals"
Clover: Sad as I am about not being spy chic anymore, I definitely won't miss the WOOHPings!
Alex: You can say that again! [knocks an acorn out of her ear] Oh... no seriously, I couldn't hear you, say that again!
Alex: You can say that again! [knocks an acorn out of her ear] Oh... no seriously, I couldn't hear you, say that again!
— Totally Spies!, "Totally Dunzo! (Part 1)"
"Oh, Sam! I could eat your ice cream all day long! ...So I think I will." [proceeds to rewind himself with the Quantum Replay 9000 to make himself un-eat his ice cream cone]
— Hugh Neutron, The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius, "Sorry, Wrong Era"
Just me! (We all got a platypus controlling us!)
I'd stop if I was able! (We all got a platypus controlling us!)
I'm not speaking metaphorically,
The platypus controlling me is underneath the table!
I'd stop if I was able! (We all got a platypus controlling us!)
I'm not speaking metaphorically,
The platypus controlling me is underneath the table!
— Dr. Doofenshmirtz, "There's a Platypus Controlling Me", Phineas and Ferb, "Brain Drain"
