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Anime and Manga
Rias: I know it's terribly rude, but I didn't have a chance to wash after leaving your place.
Issei: Oh no, you're hot- uh, fine- I mean... all... good.
Issei: Oh no, you're hot- uh, fine- I mean... all... good.
— High School D×D anime (English dub)
Comic Books
Supergirl: Was that high school stunt really necessary, Superman, or were you trying to impress me?
Superboy: Aw, I was chest choking… ab, ah, I mean—I was just joking!
Superboy: Aw, I was chest choking… ab, ah, I mean—I was just joking!
— The Death of Superman, Reign of the Supermen
"Phone home. 'Lexcorp, honey, don't wait up. I'll be late. I've decided to stay in Gotham for a Bat — a bit — visit old friends.'"
Supergirl: She can't be, Mrs. Berkowitz! We told you—
Mrs. Berkowitz: You told...?!
Supergirl: [thinking] Stupid! Stupid! Maybe I ought to just put on my wig and introduce myself next time!
Mrs. Berkowitz: You told...?!
Supergirl: [thinking] Stupid! Stupid! Maybe I ought to just put on my wig and introduce myself next time!
Fan Works
"Supergirl grimaced. 'I feel like slapping you again. If I didn't love you more now than I ever have before, I'd do it. I—'
Her hand went to her mouth. Dev looked at her. His expression was caught coming up from anguish into hope.
'So you said it,' he murmured.
Kara was flustered."
Her hand went to her mouth. Dev looked at her. His expression was caught coming up from anguish into hope.
'So you said it,' he murmured.
Kara was flustered."
Cherry: Oh, yes. I got to work on some stuff at home. You could walk me home- if you want...
Keith: Wait, but isn't your dad going to be there?
Cherry: He shouldn't be.
Keith: Well, if he's not here, then I'm fine with walking you home- I mean... walking home with you.
Keith: Wait, but isn't your dad going to be there?
Cherry: He shouldn't be.
Keith: Well, if he's not here, then I'm fine with walking you home- I mean... walking home with you.
She told Shinji these things and he was always listening. He was always there. And at some point, he stopped finding horrible things to tell her back. So he listened carefully and never interrupted. And whenever she looked at him he watched in amazement as her face transformed into something like love. The more terrible things she said the more he could see that she loved him. And the more she seemed to drink, the more things she was willing to freely share.
That's what ended it really. She was just drunk enough for the alcohol to be an excuse, but not quite enough for either of them to dismiss it as nonsense.
"I feel so alone," she said and she held onto him tight. "I'm so glad you're here. I don't think I could have taken it if it were Asuka and not you."
He broke away from her then and they both looked each other square in the eyes. Both their faces showed shock, but only Misato's showed fear.
"I'm sorry," she said and Shinji just stared at her and stared at her and stared.
"That came out all wrong," she said and it hurt how much he wanted to believe her.
That's what ended it really. She was just drunk enough for the alcohol to be an excuse, but not quite enough for either of them to dismiss it as nonsense.
"I feel so alone," she said and she held onto him tight. "I'm so glad you're here. I don't think I could have taken it if it were Asuka and not you."
He broke away from her then and they both looked each other square in the eyes. Both their faces showed shock, but only Misato's showed fear.
"I'm sorry," she said and Shinji just stared at her and stared at her and stared.
"That came out all wrong," she said and it hurt how much he wanted to believe her.
Jean Grey: You know, between changing in the locker room and the bad guys pretty much blowing our uniforms off, there's possibly about six inches of you that I haven't seen.
Scott Summers: I didn't know you looked.
Jean: I never... I didn't mean... I just catch a glimpse... You're enjoying this way too much, Summers.
Scott Summers: I didn't know you looked.
Jean: I never... I didn't mean... I just catch a glimpse... You're enjoying this way too much, Summers.
Film — Animated
Janitor: You're all washed up, McQueen.
Lightning: I-I'm sorry, what?
Janitor: Said, floor's all washed up, and clean.
Lightning: I-I'm sorry, what?
Janitor: Said, floor's all washed up, and clean.
— Cars 3
"Humpty still has his claws— I meant 'flaws' was what I meant! Not claws; he's not a... cat."
— Puss, Puss in Boots (2011) (while thinking about why his crush has no claws)
"Appetite is coming, and he's gonna have a big ego... I mean Ego! He's coming!"
— Linguini, Ratatouille
"I'm Rodney Bigbottom. No, I mean Copperbottom."
— Rodney Copperbottom, to Aunt Fanny, Robots
Film — Live-Action
"Jacksie!" (Beat) "Taxi!"
— Sidney Bliss, Carry On Loving
"I'll lose the kidneys! I mean the sale."
— Phil, Nanny McPhee and the Big Bang
Literature
"August's brain tries 'hi' and her mouth goes for 'morning' and what comes out is, 'Horny.'"
— One Last Stop, when August meets Jane for the second time
"Thirty-one, thirty-loo..."
— Bertie Burns, trying to distract himself from a Potty Emergency by counting cars, Dirty Bertie
Teacher: What is the capital of Pennsylvania?
Fern Arable: (thinking of her pet pig) Wilbur.
"Mr. Ego— that's Mr. Figo!"
— Helen Highwater, Stinkbomb
Live-Action TV
Woody: What's a Freudian slip?
Cliff: Why, it's when you say one thing when you're actually thinking about a mother.
Cliff: Why, it's when you say one thing when you're actually thinking about a mother.
Britta (picking up one of the psych tests): All right. Somebody drew a penis. (picks up another one) Oh. And another penis. (flips through the rest) Penis... penis... penis. Very mature, guys.
Jeff: I didn't draw a penis.
Shirley: Me neither.
Abed (flipping through the tests): These are all normally filled out tests.
Britta: ...ha ha, gotcha! This was also a test and you all penised... passed. (looks down in shame) Maybe I need to take one... A test, not a penis.
Jeff: I didn't draw a penis.
Shirley: Me neither.
Abed (flipping through the tests): These are all normally filled out tests.
Britta: ...ha ha, gotcha! This was also a test and you all penised... passed. (looks down in shame) Maybe I need to take one... A test, not a penis.
"Next Doctor": It started with a murder...
Tenth Doctor: Murder? Good! [gets a weird look] I mean... bad.
Tenth Doctor: Murder? Good! [gets a weird look] I mean... bad.
"I'm just doing my breast... I mean 'best'."
— Jonathan Archer, Star Trek: Enterprise, "A Night in Sickbay"
"I'm so relieved— I mean 'happy'!"
— Beverly Crusher, after realizing that Ogawa's boyfriend wasn't cheating on her after all, Star Trek: The Next Generation, "Lower Decks"
Theatre
"I don't think about that sort of thing. Me and Max, in carnal embrace? That's ridiculous. Mom, will you pass the butt stuff? (Beat) The butter. Butter. Will you pass the butter? I just want some head and butter- bread! Bread! Bread and butt sex to go with this big shaft of meat I'm gonna choke down!"
— Grace Chasity, Nerdy Prudes Must Die
Video Games
"Oh, daddy! I mean father!"
— Precious Wutzkums, D.M. Dinwiddie, Physician-in-Training
"We're back with Best Friend Tabitha, who was telling us why humans should {cue angry Tabitha voice} STAY THE HELL AWAY, {back to normal Rhonda voice} er, keep their distance from the State of Utobitha."
— Tabitha, Fallout: New Vegas
"AAH! Oh god, you look TE- uh... Good! Looking good, actually!"
— Wheatley, Portal 2
"Greetingz, How can we fleece—I mean 'elp you?"
— Goblin Great Shaman, Total War: Warhammer
Web Animation
"Room, lock the doors to the Romelu... (Romelu Lukaku attempts to close the door but stops) ... I mean, Romelu, Lukaku the doors...I mean, never mind."
—Thomas Muller, The Champions (2018)
Loona: Shut up, Da-!
[Blitzo looks delighted at what she was about to say.]
Loona: [frustrated groan] -Blitzo!
[Blitzo looks delighted at what she was about to say.]
Loona: [frustrated groan] -Blitzo!
Webcomics
Drizz'l: We are summoning fell under-beasts from the depths of hell to do our bidding and that's final.
Vilbert: You mean our bidding, of course.
Drizz'l: That is what I said.
Vilbert: Oh, I assumed you'd slip up and say "my."
Drizz'l: Well, I'm a good liar.
Vilbert: You mean our bidding, of course.
Drizz'l: That is what I said.
Vilbert: Oh, I assumed you'd slip up and say "my."
Drizz'l: Well, I'm a good liar.
EB: was...
EB: was that another weird erotic slip of the tongue?
EB: was that another weird erotic slip of the tongue?
— John Egbert, Homestuck
GG: That wasn't even a Freudian slip.
GG: Doctor Freud just tripped over an errant phallus, tumbled down a flight of stairs, and broke his neck.
GG: And then his cigar exploded comically in his face.
GG: Doctor Freud just tripped over an errant phallus, tumbled down a flight of stairs, and broke his neck.
GG: And then his cigar exploded comically in his face.
— Jane Crocker, Homestuck
"God damn Dave's contagious-ass Freudian boners."
— Rose Lalonde, Homestuck
Web Video
"I think everybody remembers their first boner— BOWIE!"
— The Nostalgia Chick's first line in her Labyrinth review.
Western Animation
"You heard the princess! Raise the anchors! We're taking the prisoners home!" (gets an epic Oh, Crap! look on his face as Azula gives him a Death Glare)
— Captain, Avatar: The Last Airbender, "The Avatar State"
Cricket: ♫ And it's not when giant Christmas trees destroy the whole ice rink! ♫
Bill: Wait, what?
Cricket: Uh, nothing... Keep going!!
Bill: Wait, what?
Cricket: Uh, nothing... Keep going!!
Cricket: How can anyone think this is fun?
Bill: What was that?
Cricket: AUGH! I said, "So great! To work in the sun!"
Bill: Mm-hmm...
Gramma: He's listenin' in on us!
Cricket: If he hugs me again, I'm gonna lose it!
Bill: You say somethin'?
Cricket: Oh, uh... Gramma's gonna... teach me how to knit!
Bill: Mmm, that's nice...
[...]
Bill: Don't mean to interrupt, but can you do me a favor and deliver Gloria's order of berries?
(Both gasp)
Gramma: We'd love to get away from here! I mean, to do this favor. For you!
Bill: What was that?
Cricket: AUGH! I said, "So great! To work in the sun!"
Bill: Mm-hmm...
Gramma: He's listenin' in on us!
Cricket: If he hugs me again, I'm gonna lose it!
Bill: You say somethin'?
Cricket: Oh, uh... Gramma's gonna... teach me how to knit!
Bill: Mmm, that's nice...
[...]
Bill: Don't mean to interrupt, but can you do me a favor and deliver Gloria's order of berries?
(Both gasp)
Gramma: We'd love to get away from here! I mean, to do this favor. For you!
— Big City Greens, "Papaganda"
"And can't you see that she's out of control and overzealous?!
I'm telling you for your own good, and not because I'm—" [blushes heavily]
I'm telling you for your own good, and not because I'm—" [blushes heavily]
— Pearl, Steven Universe, "Coach Steven"
"Roomie?! Ah, it must be a mistake! Our closets—our, I mean, our penthouse is crammed to capacity!"
— Clover, Totally Spies!, "Super Mega Dance Party Yo!"
"I arrest you in the name of the lawn... I mean law!"
— I, Alphablocks (referring to U, who disobeyed a "keep off the grass" sign)
"Has anyone seen my penicillin—I mean, pencil and pen."
— Francine Frensky, feeling nervous around Buster's asthma, Arthur, "Buster's Breathless"
"Let me just get these Lawbreakers... I mean Jawbreakers!"
— Buster Baxter, feeling guilty about having stolen a toy, Arthur, "Nerves of Steal"
"I'm gonna warn... tell... warn-tell the others!"
— Fry, Futurama
Wrestling
"Thank you, Stephanie. You're the breast—I mean best."
Miscellaneous
"My sexual fantasy is to make love to Sigmund Freud's fathe— mother!"
— Stewart Francis
"Reincarnation's the most reasonable thing to believe in, otherwise God is a Dirty Old Man that oughta be ra-er-uh-raped ... yeah. [Beat] Maybe that might straighten out the Sky God, I don't know. I-I don't, I don't know, that was a Freudian slip that some of you psychologists in my midst will have to analyze. Most sex, they say, is oriented in violence, so maybe there's something to that."
— Jim Jones
"I pledge allegiance to the fag—flag."
— Minnesota news anchor, starting a story on a gay pride parade
"If you've learned anything from TV and movies, it's that when you're talking to someone naked and you're not about to have sex with them, their body parts start creeping into your sentences. If you offer a glass of chocolate milk to a chick with clothes on, no problem. If she's naked, you start saying things like, 'Would you like an ass of chocolate nipple?' or 'mmm... this is the breast lemonade I've ever vaginaed!'"
Portable Teacher: Alright, today's lesson is on polio!
[finishes typing and the Pornhub intro theme starts playing]
Portable Teacher: Oh shit, wrong "P"...
[finishes typing and the Pornhub intro theme starts playing]
Portable Teacher: Oh shit, wrong "P"...
— Trevor Wallace, "Teachers in classrooms Vs. Teachers in portables"
