Col. Trautman: Seems like bailing you out of trouble's got to be a life-time job for me.
Rambo: There wouldn't be no trouble except for that king-shit cop. All I wanted was something to eat, but the man kept pushing, sir!
Rambo: There wouldn't be no trouble except for that king-shit cop. All I wanted was something to eat, but the man kept pushing, sir!
"Why didn't you just knock on the door? I could have gotten it for you."
— Mr. Mertle, The Sandlot
"My dear student Twilight, why didn't you just say so in the first place?"
—Princess Celestia, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, "The Ticket Master"
Applejack: Y'know, this all could've been avoided if y'all just came to me in the very beginning.
Sweetie Belle: That's what I was trying to say!
Sweetie Belle: That's what I was trying to say!
—My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, "One Bad Apple"
"Now, before we begin...ah...to whom am I speaking? Hm? The son who returned to scatter his mother's ashes, or the lunatic who has murdered his way to the top of my mountain? If I was speaking to the first guy, then I would say, 'Sit down. Let's be civilized. Enjoy some food.' But we tried that before, didn't we? At our first meeting, you sat right here. Paul was off applying voltage to the nipples of your rude little plus one. I stood just like this, and what were my exact words? Ah. 'Stay here. Enjoy the Crab Rangoon. Don't. Move. I'll be right back.' Now, if you had just listened, just waited for me, then we would have come back here straightaway together, and scattered your mother's ashes. So then you must be the second guy, who didn't listen, and decided instead to join the other monkeys and start throwing his shit around."
—- Pagan Min, Far Cry 4
Almond: You're blaming me? You're saying it's my fault he attacked us? Is THAT it? SHUT UP! I guess EVERYTHING is just MY fault, huh?!
Cucumber: Yeah. I guess so. If you hadn't treated this like a game back when we had the chance to prevent it, we wouldn't even be here at all, so, yeah. I guess it is your fault.
—Cucumber Quest, pages 747-748
Barry Allen: We would have helped you...we would have done anything we could to save your life.
Zoom: Not everything!
Gordon: Great gopher! We're right back where we started! Broke and unemployed...WE'LL STARVE!
Waffle: Not if we lick ourselves!
Mr. Blik: (Dope Slaps Waffle) Any other brilliant ideas?
Waffle: Well, we could just return all of the vases. Good thing I kept the receipt.
(Gordon and Mr. Blik both Jaw Drop in disbelief and fall on their backs)
Waffle: Not if we lick ourselves!
Mr. Blik: (Dope Slaps Waffle) Any other brilliant ideas?
Waffle: Well, we could just return all of the vases. Good thing I kept the receipt.
(Gordon and Mr. Blik both Jaw Drop in disbelief and fall on their backs)
Pearl: Can you please explain this mess?
Steven: I traded that Replicator for Ranger Guy.
Pearl: Steven, why didn't you just replicate Ranger Guy?!
Steven: (Beat) DANG IT!
Steven: I traded that Replicator for Ranger Guy.
Pearl: Steven, why didn't you just replicate Ranger Guy?!
Steven: (Beat) DANG IT!
—Steven Universe, "Onion Trade"
Nostalgia Critic: "You were... that Enchant-Bitch out there. The one that's destroying the city. I'm sure you're aware of her! She was part of a team. A Super team. Am I correct?"
Amanda Waller: "...Yeah?"
Nostalgia Critic: "And there was a name, a name for this certain team if I recall that you gave it, correct?"
Amanda Waller: "...Yeah."
Nostalgia Critic: "And... what was the name of that team, again? The one you gave. I can't remember."
Amanda Waller: *Mumbles Quietly* "...Suicide Squad."
Nostalgia Critic: "What was it again?"
Amanda Waller: *Mumbles Louder* "Suicide Squad."
Nostalgia Critic: "Still didn't get it."
Amanda Waller: *Exasperatedly* "Suicide Squad."
Nostalgia Critic: "WAIT A MINUTE! THAT can't be it! Because she's part of the team 'You Were Right' About! So correct me if I'm wrong, but if this dream team was never put together, the one that 'You Were Right' About... NONE OF THIS BULLSHIT WOULD BE HAPPENING! I'd be in bed right now! It's almost like... all of this... is entirely YOUR GODDAMN FAULT! (quietly) ...Right?
Amanda Waller: "...Yeah?"
Nostalgia Critic: "And there was a name, a name for this certain team if I recall that you gave it, correct?"
Amanda Waller: "...Yeah."
Nostalgia Critic: "And... what was the name of that team, again? The one you gave. I can't remember."
Amanda Waller: *Mumbles Quietly* "...Suicide Squad."
Nostalgia Critic: "What was it again?"
Amanda Waller: *Mumbles Louder* "Suicide Squad."
Nostalgia Critic: "Still didn't get it."
Amanda Waller: *Exasperatedly* "Suicide Squad."
Nostalgia Critic: "WAIT A MINUTE! THAT can't be it! Because she's part of the team 'You Were Right' About! So correct me if I'm wrong, but if this dream team was never put together, the one that 'You Were Right' About... NONE OF THIS BULLSHIT WOULD BE HAPPENING! I'd be in bed right now! It's almost like... all of this... is entirely YOUR GODDAMN FAULT! (quietly) ...Right?
— Nostalgia Critic, review of Suicide Squad (2016)
"In a remote part of the county, the first of a series of tragedies took place; tragedies that could have been avoided had the public been warned."
—Narrator, The Creeping Terror
Zak: You recall the diary, yes?
Phoenix: ...How could I forget? That scrap of papernote lost me my attorney's badge.
Zak: This is the real page that was torn from the book. Magnifi gave it to me that night.
Phoenix: ...You could have told me this earlier. Like, seven years earlier.
Phoenix: ...How could I forget? That scrap of papernote lost me my attorney's badge.
Zak: This is the real page that was torn from the book. Magnifi gave it to me that night.
Phoenix: ...You could have told me this earlier. Like, seven years earlier.
"We would've helped you get home if you had asked!"
— Michael Burnham, to Gabriel Lorca, Star Trek: Discovery, "What's Past Is Prologue"
"I just- I just realized that Lydia has the names. I can get them from her. I'm sorry, Mike. This, this whole thing could've been avoided."
—Walter White after realizing the names of the men he killed Mike for was easily available, Breaking Bad
Prima: This is all your fault!
Juna: No, it's yours! Besides, if you missent a WA to someone and that person hadn't read it, you could have just deleted it using the "Delete for Everyone" feature.
Prima: Well, that's right. That's pretty smart of you. (Juna smugly poses) But it's too late, Junedi!
Juna: No, it's yours! Besides, if you missent a WA to someone and that person hadn't read it, you could have just deleted it using the "Delete for Everyone" feature.
Prima: Well, that's right. That's pretty smart of you. (Juna smugly poses) But it's too late, Junedi!
Hank: My question for you is, how come after you hit that fella, you didn't just drive to the hospital or wave down a passing motorist and ask them to call the cops?
Peggy: ...You say it like these things happen in a vacuum. Like it's a test. Check "A" or "B." But it's like... decisions you make in a dream, ya know?
Peggy: ...You say it like these things happen in a vacuum. Like it's a test. Check "A" or "B." But it's like... decisions you make in a dream, ya know?
—Fargo, "Rhinoceros"
"I probably shouldn't have dumped that kibble..."
—Ruff Ruffman, FETCH! with Ruff Ruffman, "How to Get Out Your Inner Hip-Hop"
King Dedede: Kirby, you let the demon out to destroy us all! I broke the Star Rod to prevent this from happening! You were useless!
Kirby: I was going to destroy the demon anyway! You could've saved me all the trouble and just let me beat it hours ago!
King Dedede: DON'T QUESTION MY METHODS!
Kirby: I was going to destroy the demon anyway! You could've saved me all the trouble and just let me beat it hours ago!
King Dedede: DON'T QUESTION MY METHODS!
"None of this would have happened if you'd just stopped. But on you marched, and for what?"
— John Konrad, Spec Ops: The Line
"Ah... I feel sorry for Pokémon. They're ruled by Poké Balls and the whims of their Trainers... Lord Ghetsis spoke of Pokémon liberation two years ago simply for his own ambitions, but... If his plans had succeeded, many Pokémon would have been saved."
— Shadow Triad, Pokémon Black 2 and White 2
"(Wait? You mean Wigglytuff raids the supply?! When Chatot told us the supply was low last time, he had no idea how it dropped so low... Whatever happened to 'The larder is more secure than Duskull Bank'...? That it was just a stocktake error? We could have avoided the whole Apple Woods fiasco in the first place!)"
— Mitchell, PMD Explorers Retold
Asaga: Tada! The ancient Crown Jewel of the Ryuvian people! The Lost Technology known as the Talbur! The magical compass which will take us straight to Crow Harbor!
Kayto Shields: Well... There it is. Ugh... To think... We had everything we needed to find Crow Harbor when we first got to the Star Palace from the beginning! I... need to sit down. This is too much to take in all at once... I feel like I just lost half my life span... Seriously... We flew to the four corners of the galaxy in search of clues... risked our lives on multiple occasions... But all this time, all we needed to find Crow Harbor was right here, all this time, under your underwear pile. What was the point of it all? Seriously...
Asaga: Eh-heh. I suppose there's something metaphorical about all this...
Kayto Shields: Well... There it is. Ugh... To think... We had everything we needed to find Crow Harbor when we first got to the Star Palace from the beginning! I... need to sit down. This is too much to take in all at once... I feel like I just lost half my life span... Seriously... We flew to the four corners of the galaxy in search of clues... risked our lives on multiple occasions... But all this time, all we needed to find Crow Harbor was right here, all this time, under your underwear pile. What was the point of it all? Seriously...
Asaga: Eh-heh. I suppose there's something metaphorical about all this...
—Sunrider 4: The Captain's Return
Sonic: WHAT?!?!
Sonichu: Yeah, these no-good trolls stole my PlayStation account password, and they said they would only give it back if I sent a, uh… video of me shovin' my medallion up my [HAT]. So I did.
Sonic: Dude, you can just call PlayStation Network to reset your password!
Sonichu: Yeah, I found out that's true. That's the, uh… the only way to do that! So I didn't have to do that with, uh… my medallion. Hmm.
Sonic: How old were you?
Sonichu: 27.
Sonic: No!
Sonichu: Yeah, these no-good trolls stole my PlayStation account password, and they said they would only give it back if I sent a, uh… video of me shovin' my medallion up my [HAT]. So I did.
Sonic: Dude, you can just call PlayStation Network to reset your password!
Sonichu: Yeah, I found out that's true. That's the, uh… the only way to do that! So I didn't have to do that with, uh… my medallion. Hmm.
Sonic: How old were you?
Sonichu: 27.
Sonic: No!
"So, from the VERY START... you could have TOLD me where the portal was, WHAT the portal key is, WHY I am immortal, WHAT happened to my mortality, AND the fact that it's in this Fortress?! Morte, I'll *KILL* you...!"
— The Nameless One, Planescape: Torment
Doctor Strange: I'm so sorry about you and your friends not getting into college, but if they rejected you and you tried to convince them to reconsider, there's nothing else you can do.
[Beat]
Peter Parker: When you say "convince them", you mean, like, I could have called them?
Doctor Strange: Yeah.
Peter Parker: I could do that?
Doctor Strange: You haven't called the—
Peter Parker: I mean, I got their letter, and I assumed that that was—
Doctor Strange: I'm sorry. Are you telling me that you didn't even think to plead your case with them first before you asked me to brainwash the entire world?
[Beat]
Peter Parker: When you say "convince them", you mean, like, I could have called them?
Doctor Strange: Yeah.
Peter Parker: I could do that?
Doctor Strange: You haven't called the—
Peter Parker: I mean, I got their letter, and I assumed that that was—
Doctor Strange: I'm sorry. Are you telling me that you didn't even think to plead your case with them first before you asked me to brainwash the entire world?
Alien: "We are sorry that we mistook your actions as an attack.[...]They have explained your situation and the effects from our disposal of radioactive waste on your planet. We apologize for this.[...]Part of our planetwide treaty was for us to work together and dispose of all the weapons of destruction left on the planet."
Supergirl: "I get it...and dump it into our Sun. Well... Thanks for taking it elsewhere. I wish you all good luck with everything...and when you guys are visiting Earth, look me up. But in the future ask questions first, then shoot."
Supergirl: "I get it...and dump it into our Sun. Well... Thanks for taking it elsewhere. I wish you all good luck with everything...and when you guys are visiting Earth, look me up. But in the future ask questions first, then shoot."
[following a falling-out with Frida caused by a failure to find a book that disappeared from her messy bedroom]
David: You could just learn to tidy your own flippin' room!
Hilda: He's not wrong.
David: You could just learn to tidy your own flippin' room!
Hilda: He's not wrong.
— Hilda, "The Ghost"
""Hat." We thought of "authentic Native American headdress" before we thought of "hat"."
— Marshall Eriksen, How I Met Your Mother
