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Anime & Manga
Hello, Graham, would you mind coming back to earth with the rest of us, please?
— Shaft, Baccano!
Comic Books
"Sometimes I forget what I was going to say. Sometimes I remember things everyone else has forgotten for ever and always. Does that ever happen to you?"
— Delirium, The Sandman: Season of Mists
"I was thinking what it's like to be abandoned and tortured and abused and forgotten. [...] But then I thought... 'I wonder what it's like to fuck a butterfly?'"
— Ragdoll, Secret Six
Fan Works
"The girl went on stalking through the corridor, like she had dramatic music accompanying her that only she could hear."
She wasn't disappointed that she might be crippled for life, that was her fault for not evacuating when the giant monster showed up. She, however, was disappointed when the doctors refused her request to amputate her legs and replace them with metal ones that she could use to fight crime in the night. With that, her dream of becoming a cyborg vigilante was struck down for the fourth time in her short life. Her attention returned to her room's TV as she flipped through the channels.
"I've always felt that everything I've done was what I should've done. From kindergarten on, I've been seeing the world through a specific lens that I can't describe. All this time, I've been living my life as my whims dictate. Other ponies tell me that my behavior is off-kilter, and I've tried to keep that reined in... but it always overcame me without it trying, and eventually I decided not to struggle against it anymore. I can't give an answer for why I act the way I do, why I'm as strange as I seem to others, or why I've just gone with the flow for most of my life. All I know is that it just seems right."
— Gray Ghost, Manehattan's Lone Guardian
Films — Live-Action
Have small space aliens ever landed in your brain and told you to break into the zoo and free the kangaroos?
— Heather, Good Burger
I'm sure on some planet your style is impressive, but your weak link is: this is Earth.
Marty: Have you noticed lately that [Captain Jack Sparrow] seems to be acting a bit strange?
Gibbs: (silently stares at him)
Marty: ...-er.
Gibbs: (silently stares at him)
Marty: ...-er.
Yondu: (takes a flame-shaped patch out of his pocket) The drawer you wanna open has this symbol on it.
(he gives the patch to Groot)
(Beat)
(Groot puts the patch on his head)
Yondu: WHAT?! NO!
Rocket: He thinks you want him to wear it as a hat.
Yondu: That's not what I said!
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: He's relieved you don't want him to.
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: He hates hats.
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: On anyone, not just himself.
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: One minute you think someone has a weird-shaped head, the next minute it's 'cause you realize part of that head is a hat.
(Beat)
Rocket: That's why you don't like hats?
Groot: (nods)
(he gives the patch to Groot)
(Beat)
(Groot puts the patch on his head)
Yondu: WHAT?! NO!
Rocket: He thinks you want him to wear it as a hat.
Yondu: That's not what I said!
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: He's relieved you don't want him to.
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: He hates hats.
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: On anyone, not just himself.
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: One minute you think someone has a weird-shaped head, the next minute it's 'cause you realize part of that head is a hat.
(Beat)
Rocket: That's why you don't like hats?
Groot: (nods)
Ronnie Kray: ...And I'm staring at the back of this geezer's head. The whole time I'm thinkin', you know, "Give Ron Kray your sausage." [Beat] "Give... Ron... your fuckin' sausage." You know? I was drillin' my eyes into the back of his head, 'til I'm not even thinkin' it anymore. I'm not - I'm not even... thinkin': I'm broadcastin' it. Until he turns around and you know what he says? He says, "Hey, Ron, do you fancy my sausage? I've got... I've got no appetite for it." Interesting.
Frances Shea: When my future brother-in-law said "interesting," it meant he had no fucking idea what he or you or anyone else was talking about.
Mr. Farquhar: Have you got a ticket?
Mr. Tuttle: Yes, I have. Have you?
Mr. Farquhar: Of course. I'm the courier, sir, in charge of the party.
Mr. Tuttle: How nice.
Literature
Alice: But I don't want to go among mad people.
Cheshire Cat: Oh, you can't help that, we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.
Alice: How do you know I'm mad?
Cheshire Cat: You must be, or you wouldn't have come here.
Cheshire Cat: Oh, you can't help that, we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.
Alice: How do you know I'm mad?
Cheshire Cat: You must be, or you wouldn't have come here.
The Doctor didn't even slow down. One part of his brain started madly calculating velocities and trajectories. Another part started advising him strongly against this course of action. Another part was sticking its arms out and making aeroplane noises.
The girl gave off an aura of distinct dottiness. Perhaps it was the fact that she had stuck her wand behind her left ear for safekeeping, or that she had chosen to wear a necklace of Butterbeer caps, or that she was reading a magazine upside down.
— Harry Potter on Luna Lovegood, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
Live-Action TV
Joey: Maybe my ruler was wrong.
Phoebe: Maybe all the rulers are wrong.
Phoebe: Maybe all the rulers are wrong.
— Friends
In the parlance of the 20th century, this is an odd-ball. His name is James B. W. Bevis, and his tastes lean toward stuffed animals, zither music, professional football, Charles Dickens, moose heads, carnivals, dogs, children and young ladies. Mr Bevis is accident-prone, a little vague, a little discombooberated, with a life that possesses all the security of a floating crap-game. But this can be said about our Mr Bevis: Without him, without his warmth, without his kindness, the world would be a considerably poorer place. Albeit, perhaps, a little saner.
— Rod Serling's opening monologue for The Twilight Zone, "Mr. Bevis"
You know, whenever [Cat Valentine] starts talking I think to myself, "Maybe this time it'll make sense." I'm always wrong.
— Andre Harris, Victorious
Sarah-Jane Smith: Are you serious?
The Doctor: About what I do, yes. Not necessarily the way I do it.
The Doctor: About what I do, yes. Not necessarily the way I do it.
Craig: Has anybody ever told you you're a bit weird?
The Doctor: They never really stop.
The Doctor: They never really stop.
Octavian: (about The Doctor) You trust this man?
River Song: I absolutely trust him.
Octavian: He's not some kind of madman, then?
River Song: (pause) I absolutely trust him.
Dennis: Lets talk about your likes and dislikes. Umm... how about your favorite food, what would that be?
Charlie: Oh, milksteak.
Dennis and Mac: (simultaneously) Hmm?
Dennis: What?
Charlie: Milksteak.
Dennis: I'm not putting milksteak.
Mac: Just put regular steak and then-
Charlie: Don't put regular steak, put milksteak, she'll know what it is.
Dennis: No she won't know what it is, Charlie! Nobody knows what that is.
Charlie: Oh, milksteak.
Dennis and Mac: (simultaneously) Hmm?
Dennis: What?
Charlie: Milksteak.
Dennis: I'm not putting milksteak.
Mac: Just put regular steak and then-
Charlie: Don't put regular steak, put milksteak, she'll know what it is.
Dennis: No she won't know what it is, Charlie! Nobody knows what that is.
Klaus: Any luck finding your one-eyed man?
Luther: What's he talkin' about?
Number Five: Does it matter? It's Klaus. What do you want, Luther?
Luther: Um... So, Grace may have had something to do with Dad's death. So I need you to come back to the academy, all right? It's important.
Number Five: "It's important." You have no concept of what's important!
Klaus: Hey! Did I ever tell you guys about the time I waxed my ass with chocolate pudding? [laughs] It was so painful!
Luther: What's he talkin' about?
Number Five: Does it matter? It's Klaus. What do you want, Luther?
Luther: Um... So, Grace may have had something to do with Dad's death. So I need you to come back to the academy, all right? It's important.
Number Five: "It's important." You have no concept of what's important!
Klaus: Hey! Did I ever tell you guys about the time I waxed my ass with chocolate pudding? [laughs] It was so painful!
—The Umbrella Academy (2019), "Extra Ordinary"
Stephen Fry: What happenens in the Rhubarb Triangle?
Johnny Vegas: Do marzipan fighter planes go missing? Do they not pick up anything on the liquorice RADAR and suddenly start talking nonsense and gingerbread men, good men, who fought in the Pudding Wars, just vanished and the wives are stood there holding their eyes going "This is all they found"?
Stpehen Fry: I want to live in your world Johnny Vegas.
Johnny Vegas: Do marzipan fighter planes go missing? Do they not pick up anything on the liquorice RADAR and suddenly start talking nonsense and gingerbread men, good men, who fought in the Pudding Wars, just vanished and the wives are stood there holding their eyes going "This is all they found"?
Stpehen Fry: I want to live in your world Johnny Vegas.
—QI
Hello in there, Cliff. Tell me, what color is the sky in your world?
— Dr. Frasier Crane, Cheers
Music
When I'm bored, I kinda drift away,
I'm not sure quite why we work all day
I've been thinking, and I've got this plan
Let's go, right now
I'm not sure quite why we work all day
I've been thinking, and I've got this plan
Let's go, right now
— Lily Allen, "Air Balloon"
Some people think I'm bonkers, but I just think I'm free!
And I'm just livin' my life; there's nothin' crazy about me!
Some people pay for thrills, but I get mine for free!
Man, I'm just livin' my life; there's nothin' crazy about me!
And I'm just livin' my life; there's nothin' crazy about me!
Some people pay for thrills, but I get mine for free!
Man, I'm just livin' my life; there's nothin' crazy about me!
— Dizzee Rascal, "Bonkers"
She's a mass of contradictions
A pick-and-mix of strange convictions
It can be a source of friction
But there are worse afflictions
Love doesn't make distinctions
A pick-and-mix of strange convictions
It can be a source of friction
But there are worse afflictions
Love doesn't make distinctions
— The Divine Comedy, "Arthur C. Clarke's Mysterious World"
Can't help it if I space in a daze, my eyes tune out the other way,
I may switch off and go in a daydream.
In this head my thoughts are deep, but sometimes I can't even speak.
Would someone be and not pretend? I'm off again in my world.
I may switch off and go in a daydream.
In this head my thoughts are deep, but sometimes I can't even speak.
Would someone be and not pretend? I'm off again in my world.
— Avril Lavigne, "My World"
Video Games
Did [Sara] say something to you? Please forget it. She mumbles strange things from time to time. She can be an odd girl at times.
Yusuke: That girl marches to the beat of her own drum, doesn't she?
Ryuji: Like you're one to talk.
Ryuji: Like you're one to talk.
Grune: I'm going to give it my all. Charge~!
Chloe: ...Where are you going?
Grune: Oh? Where was I going?
Chloe: ...Where are you going?
Grune: Oh? Where was I going?
— A skit
from Tales of Legendia
from Tales of Legendia"I once dug a pit and filled it with clouds... or was it clowns?... Come to think of it, it began to smell... must have been clowns. Clouds don't smell, they taste of butter. And tears."
"I just learned that gravestones are for the dead. Had to unbury myself. Very informative experience."
—Note left by The Gambler, The Brains And The Brawn
Visual Novels
Talking with Rin is like playing chess with a supercomputer who does seemingly random moves as if to mock everything you know about chess. It's like that, but with human interaction. And even if I win, it feels like losing.
— Hisao Nakai, Katawa Shoujo
Web Animation
[Haru and Rin bump into each other coming out of changing rooms at a department store]
Rin: Haru?!
Haru: Rin? If you're here, and I'm here, then who's flying this plane?!
Rin: ...What.
Haru: What?
Rin: Let's talk outside.
Haru: I'm not going out there without a parachute!
Rin: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!
Haru: I DON'T KNOW!
Rin: Haru?!
Haru: Rin? If you're here, and I'm here, then who's flying this plane?!
Rin: ...What.
Haru: What?
Rin: Let's talk outside.
Haru: I'm not going out there without a parachute!
Rin: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!
Haru: I DON'T KNOW!
— 50% OFF
Homestar Runner (cosplaying as himself): Was it my star (taped onto his star T-shirt) or propeller cap (worn atop his own propeller beanie) that gave it away?
Strong Bad: It was your unbelievably loose grasp on the world around you.
Homestar Runner: Yeah, I guess I do have one of those.
Strong Bad: It was your unbelievably loose grasp on the world around you.
Homestar Runner: Yeah, I guess I do have one of those.
"Hands do not exist in my reality!"
— Kaldor Draigo, If the Emperor Had a Text-to-Speech Device
Church: God damn, man, I would love to live in your world for about ten minutes.
Caboose: Yeah. I have a really good time.
Caboose: Yeah. I have a really good time.
Otacon: Snake, this is insane.
Snake: Otacon, I'm not exaggerating when I say that the success of my mission hinges on how I use this cardboard box.
— DEATH BATTLE!: Solid Snake vs. Sam Fishernote
Webcomics
Fighter: Aren't you going to ask how it's our lifelong dream when we just met Red Mage.
Black Mage: So you're actually aware that this makes no sense then?
Fighter: Yet we chase our dreams anyway.
Black Mage: Every day with you is an adventure I never wanted. Like swimming naked through shards of glass.
Black Mage: So you're actually aware that this makes no sense then?
Fighter: Yet we chase our dreams anyway.
Black Mage: Every day with you is an adventure I never wanted. Like swimming naked through shards of glass.
Honestly, I think the inside'a [Jared's] head is pro'lly one'a th' most bizarre an' interesting places anyone could live.
Sometimes I think your train of thought is carrying a shipment of toxic waste.
— Ozy to Millie, Ozy and Millie
Aeris: Do you even listen to yourself any more?
Leo: I try not to. It breaks the illusion.
Leo: I try not to. It breaks the illusion.
Roko: Melon and logic are like oil and vinegar. You can get them to mix, but it takes vigorous shaking.
Elliot: Literal or metaphorical shaking?
Roko: Yes.
Elliot: Literal or metaphorical shaking?
Roko: Yes.
Web Original
So I was thinking... wait that doesn't sound right.
Web Videos
Lawrence: Man, being old is great! You get to be a baby but still get boners!
Bruce: ...what the fuck?
James: Every time Lawrence speaks, I realize he knows less and less about the world.
That was some quality playing there, courtesy of raocow and friends. The friends are the many voices just kinda chillin' in my head... I don't hear them, but they're there.
I dunno, I think something went horribly wrong with my thought process over the years... (giggles) I love lemonade! (chuckles) Anyway, where was I? Oh, yes, scratched discs.
I like lunchbox!
—King Dedede, Vester And Friends
Ghirahim: You need a doctor. Or a vet.
Zant: Woof!
Ghirahim: Definitely a vet.
Zant: Woof!
Ghirahim: Definitely a vet.
— Bourbon Dodongo's Zant and Ghirahim, episode 1 (mirror)
)Beau: Who do you think lives in that hole?
Jester: Probably very small unicorns.
Beau: Have you ever seen a unicorn?
Jester: Yes, I've seen many. The little ones can be as small as hamsters.
Beau: ...What's it like being in your head?
Jester: It's pretty great!
Jester: Probably very small unicorns.
Beau: Have you ever seen a unicorn?
Jester: Yes, I've seen many. The little ones can be as small as hamsters.
Beau: ...What's it like being in your head?
Jester: It's pretty great!
Western Animation
I ain't got no job, my wife left me, bills pilin' up, I got child support, and I don't know if any of what I just said is true... but I believe it.
— Meatwad, Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Our minds must be conflicting because you say plague of snakes and all I hear is Easter Bunny, Easter Bunny, Easter Bunny.
— Meatwad, Aqua Teen Hunger Force
IT WORKS! I AM ONE CAN SHORT OF A SIX-PACK!!
I'm not crazy - I just don't give a darn! Woo-hoo!
— Daffy Duck, "Daffy Duck and Egghead"
I always let my imagination run away from me! Then it comes back... with cake!
— Pinkie Pie, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic
The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.
— Patrick Star contemplates milk, SpongeBob SquarePants
Early Cuyler: Yeah, I know 'bout Dan Halen. He was a ornery feller, chatterin' up inna tree all tauntin' like. Cheeks all puffed up with wallynuts and whatnot. I took aim at 'im with my pellet gun and blasted the tar outta him.
Interviewer: Are you sure you're not talking about that stuffed squirrel over there?
(cut to stuffed squirrel on Early's mantle)
Early: Oh. Well, you might be right about that, now.
Interviewer: Are you sure you're not talking about that stuffed squirrel over there?
(cut to stuffed squirrel on Early's mantle)
Early: Oh. Well, you might be right about that, now.
Alex: (dressed only in his underwear surrounded by conspiracy theory boards) Quiet! I'm this close to connecting Garfield... to Jesus.
Josh: (picking up a can of yellow liquid) Are you drinking moonshine?
Alex: That's disgusting! That's my urine.
Josh: (picking up a can of yellow liquid) Are you drinking moonshine?
Alex: That's disgusting! That's my urine.
Real Life
If you understood everything I said, you'd be me.
Now you know I tell people I'm actually from another planet, you know, 'cause I'm a bit off the wall, well I'll tell you this boy OWNS the other planet, my goodness!
You know when you're sitting in a chair, and you lean back so you're just on two legs, and then you lean too far and you almost fall over, but just at the last second you catch yourself? I feel like that all the time.
One cannot help following the lure of her erratic and lovable personality as it meanders and twinkles through page after page. There is something noble and Quixotic and high-spirited, as well as crack-brained and bird-witted, about her. Her simplicity is so open; her intelligence so active; her sympathy with fairies and animals so true and tender. She has the freakishness of an elf, the irresponsibility of some non-human creature, its heartlessness, and its charm. And although 'they', those terrible critics who had sneered and jeered at her [since childhood]... continued to mock, few of her critics, after all, had the wit to trouble about the nature of the universe, or cared a straw for the sufferings of the hunted hare, or longed, as she did, to talk to some one 'of Shakespeare's fools'. Now, at any rate, the laugh is not all on their side.
—Virginia Woolf, "The Duchess of Newcastle" (discussing the 17th-century author Margaret Cavendish)
