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Comic Books
Gordon: Why did you have to choose an enemy that's as old as time and bigger than all of us, Batman?
Batman: Same reason you did, Jim. I figured I could take him.
Batman: Same reason you did, Jim. I figured I could take him.
— Batman #702
None of you understand. I'm not locked up in here with you. You're locked up in here with me.
— Rorschach, Watchmen
Film - Live-Action
Tallahassee sets the standard for "not to be fucked with."
— Columbus, Zombieland
And as I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I'll fear no evil for I am the baddest motherfucker in that goddamn valley.
— Staff Sergeant Sykes, Jarhead (among many others)
Your boyfriend's a badass...
— Zach to Claire, while watching Owen ride a motorcycle alongside his very own pack of tame Velociraptors, Jurassic World
Jules: I want you to look inside that bag and find my wallet.
Robber: Which one is it?
Jules: The one that says "Bad Mother Fucker."
Robber: Which one is it?
Jules: The one that says "Bad Mother Fucker."
Viggo: It is not what you did, son, that angers me so. It's who you did it to.
Iosef: Who? That fucking nobody?
Viggo: That "fuckin' nobody"... is John Wick. He once was an associate of ours. They call him "Baba Yaga."
Iosef: The Boogeyman?
Viggo: Well, John wasn't exactly the Boogeyman. He was the one you sent to kill the fucking Boogeyman.
Iosef: Oh.
Viggo: John is a man of focus, commitment, sheer will. Something you know very little about. I once saw him kill three men in a bar fight with a pencil. With a fucking pencil. One day, he tells me he wants out. It's over a woman, of course. So I made a deal with him. I gave him an impossible task. A job no one could have pulled off. The bodies he buried that day laid the foundation of what we are now. And now, my son...a few days after his wife dies, you steal his car...and kill his fucking dog!
Iosef: Who? That fucking nobody?
Viggo: That "fuckin' nobody"... is John Wick. He once was an associate of ours. They call him "Baba Yaga."
Iosef: The Boogeyman?
Viggo: Well, John wasn't exactly the Boogeyman. He was the one you sent to kill the fucking Boogeyman.
Iosef: Oh.
Viggo: John is a man of focus, commitment, sheer will. Something you know very little about. I once saw him kill three men in a bar fight with a pencil. With a fucking pencil. One day, he tells me he wants out. It's over a woman, of course. So I made a deal with him. I gave him an impossible task. A job no one could have pulled off. The bodies he buried that day laid the foundation of what we are now. And now, my son...a few days after his wife dies, you steal his car...and kill his fucking dog!
Literature
Slayer qualities: kicking ass! (emphasis mine)
— Faith LeHane calls it how it is, the Buffy the Vampire Slayer novel Go Ask Malice
Havelock Vetinari: Given, then, a contest between an invisible and very powerful quasidemonic thing of pure vengeance on the one hand, and the commander on the other, where would you wager, say... one dollar?
Drumknott: I wouldn't, sir. That looks like one that would go to the judges.
Drumknott: I wouldn't, sir. That looks like one that would go to the judges.
— Thud!
Smart plus strong plus quick equals badass.
— Harry Dresden, The Dresden Files
Until a man is twenty-five, he still thinks, every so often, that under the right circumstances he could be the baddest motherfucker in the world. If I moved to a martial-arts monastery in China and studied real hard for ten years. If my family was wiped out by Colombian drug dealers and I swore myself to revenge. If I got a fatal disease, had one year to live, and devoted it to wiping out street crime. If I just dropped out and devoted my life to being bad. Hiro used to feel this way, too, but then he ran into Raven. In a way, this was liberating. He no longer has to worry about being the baddest motherfucker in the world. The position is taken.
Live-Action TV
Al: The gruffest, toughest man to ever graduate from Polk High.
Roger: He had a beard in the seventh grade. And a wife.
Officer Dan: Took out his own appendix with a pocket fisherman.
Al: Could've been a great football player for Polk High... but he refused to take off his spurs.
Jefferson: He wore boots to play football?
Al: No boots. Just spurs.
Roger: He had a beard in the seventh grade. And a wife.
Officer Dan: Took out his own appendix with a pocket fisherman.
Al: Could've been a great football player for Polk High... but he refused to take off his spurs.
Jefferson: He wore boots to play football?
Al: No boots. Just spurs.
— Married... with Children, "The Legend of Ironhead Haynes"
Music
I could take the pitchfork from the devil
Keep a super suit like I'm incredible
From the deep blue sea to the dark blue sky
I'm the baddest man alive.
Keep a super suit like I'm incredible
From the deep blue sea to the dark blue sky
I'm the baddest man alive.
— The Black Keys and RZA, "The Baddest Man Alive"
I know karate, voodoo too
I'm gonna make myself available to you
I don't need no makeup, I got real scars
I got hair on my chest
I look good without a shirt.
I'm gonna make myself available to you
I don't need no makeup, I got real scars
I got hair on my chest
I look good without a shirt.
— Tom Waits, "Goin' Out West"
Poetry
YOU are the SUN incarnate––
WALKING INFERNO,
you are as GLORIOUS as HEAVEN,
as DEATHLY as HELL.
WALKING INFERNO,
you are as GLORIOUS as HEAVEN,
as DEATHLY as HELL.
— An untitled poem
by l.n.s
by l.n.s Professional Wrestling
Nice guys... it's said they always finish last.
But badasses... always kick an asshole's ass!
But badasses... always kick an asshole's ass!
— "You're Gonna Pay", The Undertaker's theme during his "Big Evil" persona
Tabletop Games
I am the man the Colonel visited a dozen kinds of hell upon and survived... I am the man who helped the Colonel kill three million people. I am the only man to survive when four thousand others died on the battlefield. I have killed men in their sleep. I have shot them. I have stabbed them. I have strangled them. I've even beaten them to death with my hands and fists. I've fought tyranids and orks, I've marched across searing deserts and frozen wastelands. I've nearly died six times. My own men have tried to kill me on more than one occasion. I've fought things you don't even know exist. And I killed them.
— Lieutenant Kage of the 13th Penal Legion, Warhammer 40,000
Video Games
He is no Jedi. A Jedi controls his emotions and his powers. But Starkiller... he does not know restraint. He will bring down an entire Star Destroyer on your head, if that is what it takes to kill you.
— Juno Eclipse warns Boba Fett, The Force Unleashed 2
Damn. That's one dangerous Slavic fucker!
—Johnny Klebitz on Niko Bellic, Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and Damned
The Collectors killed you once, and all it did was piss you off. I can't imagine that they'll stop you this time.
— Garrus Vakarian to Commander Shepard, in Mass Effect 2
That was slick! I should sign my work!
— Sideswipe after taking down two Decepticon brutes with one grenade, Transformers: War for Cybertron
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: Hey Snake, something I've been meaning to ask you. That canyon... Isn't that where you demolished Raven's tank? How'd you do it, anyway?
Solid Snake: How? Well... Grenades.
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: That's it? You didn't use an anti-tank missile or something?
Solid Snake: Didn't have one.
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: Your technique is kind of... how do I put this... archaic when it comes to fighting tanks. Honestly, I don't think it'd work on today's main battle tanks.
Solid Snake: Well, that's how I did it. What do you want me to say?
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: You know, I asked an active-duty Army officer once: If an infantryman had to take on a tank one-on-one, how should he do it?
Solid Snake: And what was his answer?
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: "Don't." He swore there's no way in hell a single infantryman could take down a tank by himself.
Solid Snake: Interesting.
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: I always suspected there was a little something crazy about you, Snake. But after hearing that story... Now I know it. You're nuts! Single-handedly taking out a tank? That's crazy! You're insane!
Solid Snake: Otacon, is this your idea of a compliment?
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: Yes! You're the toughest, craziest, most hardcore badass on the planet! You're... THE SHIT!
Solid Snake: How? Well... Grenades.
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: That's it? You didn't use an anti-tank missile or something?
Solid Snake: Didn't have one.
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: Your technique is kind of... how do I put this... archaic when it comes to fighting tanks. Honestly, I don't think it'd work on today's main battle tanks.
Solid Snake: Well, that's how I did it. What do you want me to say?
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: You know, I asked an active-duty Army officer once: If an infantryman had to take on a tank one-on-one, how should he do it?
Solid Snake: And what was his answer?
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: "Don't." He swore there's no way in hell a single infantryman could take down a tank by himself.
Solid Snake: Interesting.
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: I always suspected there was a little something crazy about you, Snake. But after hearing that story... Now I know it. You're nuts! Single-handedly taking out a tank? That's crazy! You're insane!
Solid Snake: Otacon, is this your idea of a compliment?
Hal 'Otacon' Emmerich: Yes! You're the toughest, craziest, most hardcore badass on the planet! You're... THE SHIT!
Webcomics
We are on Eastern Pain Time, and it is Dan o'clock. note
— Dan McNinja, The Adventures of Dr. McNinja
Best be showing some r'spect for Marlon there, th' man's a religious icon where I come from. Followers a'th' Bran-Dao believe that you don't gotta be runnin' yer mouth to prove how macho you are. Just gotta be confident an' put your all int' what you do and people will fill th' rest in themselves. We b'lieve if you live your life right, you reach a state of NirMana, where th' whole universe is in complete recognition of your masculinity.
— Commander Badass, Manly Guys Doing Manly Things
Web Original
I'm Ensign Munrooooooooe and I am a man!
Apparently, I'm made of awesome.
Tucker: Where are you going?
Tex: Red Base. Kill everybody. Get the flag back.
Tex: Red Base. Kill everybody. Get the flag back.
Western Animation
Ask yourselves. Is being in here with me what you truly desire?
— The Martian Manhunter, Justice League Unlimited
Boys, you don't want to shoot me. You know me. You know what I'll do to you if you do.
— Brock Samson, The Venture Brothers, "The Incredible Mr. Brisby"
