Literature / Spitfire

What do you do when you're a dragon and the prince you're in love with is getting married? Fuck his wife.

Spitfire is a queer romance novel by Maya Kern, otherwise known as author of Monster Pop!. It was originally published from February 15, 2020 to June 08, 2021 as a Web Serial Novel on Archive Of Our Own and Wattpad. It is now available in full via Amazon.

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This novel provides examples of:

• Benevolent Mage Ruler: The monarchs of Voswain fit this trope - and have throughout history. Ruzena the Briar Queen, ancestress of Allene, invented an arcane method that unified the Voswainian people and brought them prosperity.
• Big Beautiful Woman: Allene, who is described as fat by herself and her lovers alike. She's also something of a Statuesque Stunner, being only a couple of inches shorter than Caederyn, who is described as a tall man.
• Braids of Action: Connor Gladhill of the guard is introduced wearing her hair in two messy braids that whip about as she moves.
• Brawn Hilda: Sir Sieglinde, a knight of Prince Caederyn's guard. She's blonde, fair-complected (often red in the face), and is compared several times to a mountain.
• Blood Magic: Occurs several times throughout the book, usually involving Feon or Caederyn.
• Brooding Boy, Gentle Girl: Caederyn, the Tall, Dark, and Handsome prince whose solemn, duty-bound demeanor hides an absolutely staggering amount of self-hatred and anxiety, and Allene, his charming and energetic betrothed.
• Buxom Beauty Standard: Well-established to be true in this universe. Feon and Caederyn get distracted by low-cut necklines on large breasts several times throughout the novel; Feon describes his own overly-large breasts as "truly magnificent"; and the ladies of the Nadaran court (plus foreigners Allene and Lysithea) all agree that Eugenia, a woman with particularly massive breasts, is so overwhelmingly attractive as to be "a force of nature."
• Costume Porn: In spades. The POV characters are all royals who understand the importance of clothing and presentation to some degree, so any time a new non-servant character is introduced, expect there to be a description of that character's outfit. And any time the characters encounter one another at a social function. And when they're sizing themselves up in the mirror preparing for such a function...you get the idea.
• Crossdresser: Lysithea Ballard. Discussed between Feon and Lysithea at their first in-text meeting; Feon asks why Lysithea doesn't wear dresses anymore, and she replies that it's a matter of style.
• D-Cup Distress: When Feon, entirely naked and in his newly feminine form, tries to do jumping jacks.
• Different for Girls: To maintain his identity of "Lady Fae," Feon has to learn the ways of court ladies' fashion rather quickly. He is also awkward at best and flat-out rude at worst when trying to fit in with the gossip and chatter of the ladies.
• Dragon Hoard:
  • Played straight, and best illustrated with a direct quote:
  Feon’s bed is covered in all manner shiny objects: golden coins, surprisingly sizable jewels, pearl crusted broaches, bejeweled goblets, gilt dinnerware. The quality and value seem to range drastically from mundane trinkets and common currency to a necklace that looks suspiciously as if it might have once been someone’s family heirloom. With the bounty of pillows and blankets arranged at its perimeter, the bed has the look of a strange, golden nest.
  • Even on the road, Feon brings coins, metal trinkets, and jewelry to scatter throughout his travel bedding.
  • Beyond the shiny things in the bed, Feon's chambers are chock-full of various artwork, furniture, clothes, and even musical instruments, all crammed in haphazardly.
• Eating the Eye Candy:
  • Both Feon and Caederyn find themselves doing this to Allene, who has an ample bosom (and knows it), and whose preferred style of dresses involves low, sweeping necklines.
  • Feon spends a good portion of an entire scene doing this to Eugenia's chest.
• Everyone Is Bi: Implied. None of the characters have been stated in-universe to have a gender preference, and it seems that attraction is generally treated the same regardless of the genders involved. ^note However, Lysithea has been described on the author's social media as a "sword lesbian."
• Exotic Extended Marriage: Although Prince Caederyn's nation of Nadara is customarily monogamous, the secrecy and taboo created by such a custom makes Nadaran culture very popular for In-Universe romance writers. As a result, there are apparently reams of romance literature showing all manner of extra-marital affairs and triads, and particularly showing Nadaran sovereigns forming triads with their chosen spouse and their Bonded dragon companions. The hilarious logical conclusion is that Allene, who is from the polyamorous Voswainian royal family described below, thinks this trope applys to the Nadaran royals. (Caederyn does not agree, and is mildly horrified to learn of her misconceptions and their source.)
• Fantastic Medicinal Bodily Product: Feon's blood, which can do everything from shaking a hangover to sealing a deep blade wound. Even a magically blood-draining one.
• Green Rocks: The amber ring can alter Feon's pigmentation and physical shape as well as dampen the magical Bond between Caederyn and Feon.
• Just the Way You Are:
  Allene: [to Feon] "I like all the shapes I've seen you take."
• Lady of War: Lysithea Ballard embodies this trope through and through: from her high social status as daughter of a powerful foreign politician, to her mean streak, to her preferred weapons, a Royal Rapier and a main-gauche which she wields with a grace and precision that Caederyn - no mean swordsman himself - compares to dancing.
• Lesbian Jock: Lysithea is a truly stunning swordswoman, and the ladies love her for it.
• Locked into Strangeness: Lysithea - see entry in Mystical White Hair below.
• Mystical White Hair:
  • The Lake Lady has impossibly long white hair that trails behind her when she walks. She appears to be some kind of nymph or other fae entity.
  • Lysithea's hair and eyes both turned silver-white after she had a near-death experience with the fae and had her life saved by the Lake Lady.
• The Napoleon: Feon. In his case, his temper seems to be an incidental combination with his height, not caused by it: we find out later that Feon's shifting abilities mean that he could have followed Caed in his growth spurt, but chose not to, because growing bones sucks.
• Non-Human Non-Binary: Feon.
  Feon (having just been scolded for being rude to a lady): My lack of regard for you transcends your funky little human genders.
• Partial Transformation: Feon frequently lengthens and sharpens his teeth without altering the rest of his human form. He can also grow isolated patches of scales on his skin at various points, and sometimes even does this involuntarily.
• Polyamory:
  • Voswainian culture is polyamorous as a default, up to and including its royal family. Voswain has two queens who are married to each other - and twelve royal consorts. This is more than a mere Royal Harem system, as the consorts do seem to be officially and publicly designated somehow (Caederyn recognizes one at a ball by the bejeweled blue rose the consort wears), are parents to the royal heirs (Allene herself is the daughter of one of the queens and a consort), and are generally, by all indications, an equal part of the royal family. ^note This is not an Exotic Extended Marriage as it is not used to denote Voswain as culturally Other; it is simply a facet of the worldbuilding.
  • On an individual level, Allene is polyamorous by nature.
  Allene: I cannot be exclusive. I can give you all of me but I cannot give it to you alone....I do not wish my nature to be the cause of your undoing, but I cannot change myself. Not like this. Not for you. Not for anyone.
• Proud Beauty: Allene and Feon are both fully aware of their own attractiveness.
• Psychic Link: What Feon and Caederyn share is somewhere between this and a Bond Creatures-style link.
  Caederyn: Imagine a string, wrapped around the very core of your being and extending outwards, joining to another. It’s a tether, something to keep you safe and whole and protected. Sometimes there are reverberations, like plucking a mandolin, and I can feel an echo of what [Feon] feels, and conversely I know he can do the same, and the stronger the emotion, the larger the vibration. There is no shutting it off, not until we die. We will never be alone.
• Redheads Are Uncool: Fidelity is a rare adult female example of this trope. She's somewhat awkward and easily-embarrassed, which leads to her frequently blushing in a manner that clashes with her bright hair. Also, her hair has a tendency to frizz out of its style.
• Self-Harm: Caederyn often uses a pinprick to refocus his mind away from emotions he finds distressing. He escalates the behavior later on, even taking a knife to himself.
• Sense Freak: As a young dragon child, Feon's first shifts into human form were on the bad and overwhelming side of this trope.
  Feon: Everything was too much: too loud, too bright, too cold. My teeth felt strange and blunt and unreliable. My skin didn’t sit right over the bones and muscles I had improvised. Eating was excruciating. Excreting was worse.
• Shapeshifting Excludes Clothing: No Magic Pants here, folks except for the Shiftweave tunic, which has yet to be put to this particular test: Feon's clothing regularly rips when he transforms from his human to his draconic form.
• Silver Fox: Elske, the captain of Caederyn's personal guard, is described with these exact words when we first meet her through Feon's eyes. She's flirted with by several characters, and Caederyn himself even harbored a boyish crush on her at one point.
• Sufficiently Analyzed Magic: Voswainian magic, as we see it practiced by Allene, takes a methodical, highly scientific approach; performing various tests, writing down results, and so on.
• Supernatural Gold Eyes: Feon, whose Curtains Match the Window.
• Tall, Dark, and Handsome: Prince Caederyn is all three.
• Tomboy Princess: Lysithea Ballard. ^note She's technically not a princess, being the daughter of an ambassador; however, Lysithea's parent appears to have power above and beyond what's usually encompassed by that title. She's also shown in flashbacks to be perfectly comfortable interacting with other royal children, and there are no hints that her status is somehow lesser.
• Twist Ending: And it's a doozy. Yuen, the king's dragon companion who supposedly died in battle twenty-five years ago, is actually alive. And is living on in the guise of King Rynnwald. King Rynnwald, for his part, is the one who actually died twenty-five years ago.
• Voluntary Shapeshifting: Feon's narration frequently reminds the reader that his true form is his draconic one. He shifts to human-sized, and maintains that shift for long periods of time, in order to fulfill his role as Caederyn's companion and protector. This ability becomes relevant later on, most notably with his Sex Shifter adventures. And yes, Feon does some ''experimenting'' with his form as well, which Allene greatly enjoys.
• Weredragon: All the Nadaran Bonded Companions are the first type of this trope: dragons that can spend most of their time comfortably looking like a human being. This is the ability that leads to the above-mentioned Twist Ending.
• Wild Magic: Fae and other forces of this nature existed before the settlement of the continent, and continue to exist chiefly in the land of Ogren at the time of the story. They do not like the above-mentioned scientific Voswainian approach.
  Anthea, Earthspeaker of Ogren: "You have a reputation in Ogren. No, not you personally, but your country. Voswain. The way you do magic....It’s gross."
• The Wise Prince: Caederyn works very hard to embody this trope. Too hard, in fact.