My Property Isn't Normal is a Horror Comedy Creepypasta written by Murderbird17
and posted on the Nosleep subreddit.
The series centers around Cole, a hunter living off the land in the middle of the wilderness. However, the forest is filled with a gamut of monsters, ghosts, Eldritch Abominations, and even a Cthulhu-worshipping cult, all of whom Cole triumphs over by virtue of being a total badass and absolutely insane.
The first part can be found here. It was later adapted into a webcomic, which can be found here.
This series provides examples of:
- Badass Normal:
- Cole, obviously. He casually kills monsters like its no big deal, beats up cultists, is apparently on the run for going on a Roaring Rampage of Revenge...
- Mark. Special mention goes to him blowing up the Doll Spider by shoving a grenade inside of it.
- Big Bad: Skinny, a malevolent and sadistic shapeshifter haunting the woods.
- Butt-Monkey: Mark. On top of being a No-Respect Guy, he gets his toenails ripped off by the stairs, and gets possessed by a ghost.
- Cloudcuckoolander: Cole is batshit crazy, in the most awesome way possible.
- Dark and Troubled Past: Cole occasionally references having one. It's eventually revealed he went on a Roaring Rampage of Revenge after his father was killed, but had to go on the run as a result, at which point The Men in Black gave him his house in exchange for living in a supernatural-infested area.
- For Science!: Cole was sent to the forest by the Men in Black to test how long someone could survive in the woods. He lasts three years, and comes back to everyone's attention when he kills a Keemut and mentions it on Reddit.
- Greater-Scope Villain: Cthulhu. The plot is kicked off because the Chosen accidentally opened a portal to Hell while trying to summon him, but the big guy himself never shows up.
- Horror Comedy: While Cole's behavior and interactions with the world around him is Played for Laughs, a good chunk of the monsters are played entirely for horror, especially Skinny and the Tall Man.
- Insane Troll Logic: Cole is this incarnate.
- Knight of Cerebus: The mood gets dead serious the second Skinny and the Tall Man show up.
- The Men in Black: Mark's organization is a shadowy agency that hunts down monsters for unspecified reasons.
- Mysterious Benefactor: The Lady Who Lives in the Trees provides a ton of help to Cole, but never makes her motives known, though she's clearly entirely benevolent.
- Not-So-Harmless Villain: The Pales.
- Sacrificial Lion: The Lady in the Trees is murdered by Skinny, though she casts a curse on him that prevents him from killing people unless attacked first.
- Sequel Hook: Though Skinny is dead and the woods have quieted down as a result, the Tall Man is still around causing trouble.
- Shout-Out: The stairs and the backflipping man from Search and Rescue Woods make cameos.
- Token Good Teammate: The Lady Who Lives in the Trees is the only benevolent entity in the forest.
