Literature / Claw & Warder

"In the Locus of New York, crimes committed by magical entities threaten the delicate balance between the mundane world and the supernatural realm. The dedicated teams of detectives who investigate these breaches of Canon and Covenants are members of an elite unit known as the Supernatural Inquisitors Squad. These are their stories."

—Opening narration

Claw & Warder is a series of 2020-2021 Urban Fantasy novels written by Erik Henry Vick. The stories are written to be a supernatural parody of the TV series Law & Order. As such, they are clearly intended to be akin to episodes of a show. They follow a similar format to a police procedural like Law & Order: a crime occurs, detectives investigate and question suspects and witnesses, then they arrest someone, then the Locus Magister takes the case to court and argues in front of a judge (often a ghost).

The narrative focuses on the detectives of the Supernatural Inquisitors Squad of the 27th Precinct of NYPD. Detectives are partnered into so-called "Claw and Warder" pairs, with the "Claw" being the muscle and the "Warder" being a caster able to protect their "Claw" with spells and wards. Detective Leerome "Leery" Oriscoe is a "Claw" (by virtue of being a werewolf), who meets his new "Warder" named Drusilla "Dru" Nogan (half-succubus and half-vampire) in the first episode. They report to their Da Chief, Lieutenant Epatha Van Helsing, who used to be an excellent cop when she was alive and is now a pretty good lieutenant as a ghost. Van Helsing is constantly on Nogan's case for being a half-demon, often insulting her with various synonyms of "slut" (Oriscoe attributes it to Van Helsing being raised in Victorian times). On the legal side, there are the Executive Assistant Locus Magister Sam McCoy and Assistant Locus Magister Angie Carmichael (magisters being the lawyers of the supernatural world, and Locus Magisters being the equivalent to a District Attorney).

The series consists of the following novels/episodes:

1. Seduction
2. Arms Dealers
3. Mitzvah
4. Silkie Stalkings
5. They Ate Gatsby
6. Gnome Schooled
7. A Tail of Two Cities
8. Sure 'Lock
9. Slay Fell Things
10. Where the Wild Things Aren't

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The series provides examples of the following tropes:

• Acronym Confusion:
  • Oriscoe mentions the CSI team to a succubus he's questioning, and she assumes he's talking about crime-scene investigators. He corrects her that he means Conjuration, Scrying, and Invocation. Basically, they summon the ghosts of the victims in order to ask them questions.
  • Also, the mundanes call the SIS the Special Investigations Squad, not the Supernatural Inquisitors Squad.
  • There's also a version of SVU for the supernatural cops, but it's called the Spectral Victims Unit (specializing in crimes against spirits), not the Special Victims Unit.
  • The supernatural version of a SWAT team is called "Servitor Warriors and Therianthropes".
• All Trolls Are Different: All trolls must live in the shadow of a bridge (not under a bridge, the way it is in folklore). Norwegian Wood Trolls appear in the second story. They're brutish and are quick to anger. They're particularly dangerous when rutting, and Van Helsing gives Nogan hell for using her succubus charms on a troll that may be close to rutting.
• An Arm and a Leg: The second episode isn't called Arms Dealers for nothing. It starts with two young women being lured into an ambush and dismembered.
• Bad Santa: Santa Claus turns out to be a former frost demon named Ded Moroz (Russian for "Grandfather Frost"), who has fled Gehenna and came back as a lich. He has since settled in Niflheim and has genetically engineered an army of "Christmas drow". At his trial, his magister tried to invoke royal privilege by claiming that Moroz has been de facto performing the role of the ruler of Niflheim, as Queen Hel has been neglecting her duties for centuries, but the law is clear on who is recognized as royalty.
• Big Applesauce: As expected, the episodes take place in and around New York City (or the Locus of New York in supernatural terms).
• Bilingual Backfire: When meeting Nogan's parents, Oriscoe comes face to face with her vampire father, who dislikes werewolves. He frequently switches to French, especially to speak ill of Oriscoe to Nogan. At that point, Oriscoe answers to him in French, then explains to the surprised Nogan that he took French in school (because all the hot girls were taking it).
• Black Speech: Nogan and many witches and warlocks cast spells using Verba Patiendi, also known as the Language of Suffering. Apparently, that's the native language of the demons of Hell. Another language, which to Oriscoe's ear sounds "spidery" is called Lingua Tenebris Lacuna (the Tongue of Darkness).
• Category Traitor: A vampire suspect calls Nogan a "blood traitor" for being a cop instead of siding with her own kind. The vampires feel the same way about the two undercover vampire CBI agents.
• Clothing Damage: Before every transformation, Oriscoe makes sure to take off his clothes, usually handing them to Nogan. The only piece of clothing the wolf insists on is the traditional Jewish black hat (the wolf being more devout than Oriscoe). In the second episode, Oriscoe doesn't have time to undress and has to undergo an Emergency Transformation, ripping all his clothes. He's particularly angry at ruining his favorite shoes. After returning to human form, he has to stand there stark naked, with only the black hat to cover his privates.
• Cunning Linguist: Oriscoe speaks four languages. Besides English, he's also studied French in school. And being raised by a Jewish father means he's also fluent in Hebrew and Yiddish.
• Da Chief: Lieutenant Epatha Van Helsing can be tough (especially on Nogan), but in the end she only wants justice and will even admit that she might have been wrong (this time).
• The Devil: Lucifer makes an appearance in the fourth episode. He runs a dating app called Sinder, which also lets users know when someone near them is about to sin. He shows up to court in an attempt to quash a warrant to Sinder user data but relents when Angie's arguments turn out to be more convincing than his own. He even tries to hire Angie to be his own magister afterwards and takes her out to lunch. Despite being often referred to as the Father of Lies, he is a stickler for laws and contracts.
• Diplomatic Impunity: This comes up in the first episode, when the true culprit turns out to be a fetch impersonating Fiona Rae Gill, Irish Ambassador to the UN. McCoy successfully argues that the Irish government gave diplomatic immunity to the real Fiona Rae Gill, not the fetch.
• Drives Like Crazy: Oriscoe's parallel parking method is quite something. He deliberately seeks out spots that are too small for his Ford Crown Victoria and pushes other cars aside. When Nogan asks how he gets away with it, he explains that he always leaves behind his detective card. Apparently, no one wants to deal with a cop, so he's never been called about it. When Nogan suggests that he let her drive, he says that he has to teach her how to drive "New York style" first. But even Oriscoe is disturbed at the way Nogan's mother's driver navigates Hell.
• Eating Optional: As a half-succubus and half-vampire, Nogan doesn't eat normal food. She typically "eats" by going to sex clubs and absorbing the ambient sexual energy, although on occasion she has a craving for blood.
• Embarrassing First Name: Both Oriscoe and Nogan dislike their given names Leerome and Drusilla and prefer to go by Leery and Dru, respectively. Oriscoe explains that his parents couldn't agree on whether to name their son Leonard or Jerome, so they compromised.
• Expy: It's pretty obvious that Executive Assistant Locus Magister Sam McCoy is a supernatural stand-in for Executive Assistant District Attorney Jack McCoy of the Law & Order franchise.
• Full-Name Ultimatum: In the fourth episode, when confronting her Uncle Luci, Nogan, uses his full name Lucifer ben Mahlat when attempting to get him to comply with a court order.
• Freudian Slip: In the first episode, Nogan nearly lets it slip that her mother is one of the Queens of Hell when she refers to succubi as her mother's "subj— uh, sisters".
• Fur Against Fang: Vampires and werewolves don't particularly get along, especially old vampires who still remember the Fang Wars.
• Generic Ethnic Crime Gang:
  • The zombie mafia makes an appearance in the second and third episodes. Different families run different locuses.
  • Other gangs appear in the sixth episode, including the Leprechauns and several gnome gangs.
• Guys Smash, Girls Shoot: Detectives are typically paired into "Claw and Warder" teams, with one being the physical front-liner and the other supporting them with spells, wards, blessings, etc., depending on the Warder's nature/specialty. In the case of the story's primary detectives, Oriscoe is the Claw (being a werewolf), and Nogan is the Warder (trained to cast runes and wards). Also played straight with the SVU detectives Stabloni (a weretiger) and Benitay (a spirit summoner). The inverse happens with the Claw and Warder team they meet at the MCU, with the large and intimidating Gonofrio being the Warder (as a nephilim, he specializes in blessings), while the diminutive Earbes is the Claw of the pair (being a pooka). The only detective who doesn't have a partner is Ice Cofy, since he's a summoner.
• Hell: According to Nogan, Hell (or Gehenna, as the demons prefer to call it) is nothing like the way Christians imagine it. There's no fire or brimstone, and suffering mostly happens whenever Lucifer has a bad day. Lucifer is the undisputed ruler of Gehenna, while the four Queens of Hell (Agrat, Eisheth, Lilith, and Naamah) are his sisters. All of them are children of Mahlat. Nogan is actually Agrat's daughter and the only princess of Hell.
• Hellgate: Nogan has a portal to Hell in her apartment, so she can visit her parents whenever she wants. There's also Portal Authority in Hell itself, where any demon can buy a ticket to any of the number of portals all over Earth. It can also be used as a convenient and quick way to travel.
• Honorary Uncle: Judge Aleister Crowley is treated by Nogan as almost like an uncle.
• I Am a Humanitarian: A number of supernatural creatures eat human flesh. As long as it's only done for sustenance and the supernatural being in question is licensed in the given locus, it's not considered a crime under the Canon and Covenants. It's implied that Oriscoe used to eat human flesh until he swore off "long pork" in order to be a cop. His intimate knowledge of human anatomy crops up on occasion, such as in the second episode when he points out that human arms don't really have much meat on the bones and wouldn't make a good snack. In the fourth episode, Oriscoe offers to re-apply for the license, so he and Nogan could share a meal: he gets the meat, she gets the blood.
• I Am X, Son of Y: Nogan's real name is Drusilla bat Agrat, with "bat" meaning "daughter of" in Hebrew. Similarly, her mother's name is Agrat bat Mahlat. Lucifer's full name is Lucifer ben Mahlat (Lucifer, son of Mahlat) It's not clear if that applies to all demons or just members of royalty.
• Informed Judaism: Oriscoe is the son of a "black hat" (Hasidic) Jew and a Catholic. While he personally doesn't subscribe to either religion, it seems that his werewolf half is a devout Jew and insists on wearing the traditional black hat (and no other clothing) when it emerges.
• It's What I Do: Under the Canon and the Covenants, any supernatural creature is permitted to act in accordance with their nature. So if a vampire needs to drain a human of their blood to survive, then it's not a crime. There are certain restrictions, such as the need to be licensed, but otherwise killing for sustenance is not criminalized. Sometimes defense magisters argue that this also extends to any criminal act that is used to protect their client's nature, although it usually doesn't work.
• Lack of Imagination: The owner of the Red Door strip club named his establishment after... well, the red door that leads into it.
• Literary Allusion Title: Several of the episode names are parodies on pop-culture:
  • Silkie Stalkings
  • They Ate Gatsby
  • Where the Wild Things Aren't
• Magical Jew: The third episode, titled Mitzvah, revolves around Kabbalah and Jewish magic.
• Magitek: There's a dating app called Sinder that notifies users whenever someone is thinking of committing a sin (you can even filter by the type of sin). The app is run by Lucifer. How does it work? Through "proprietary blend of magic and technology."
• Master of Illusion: Demons are able to cast illusions to make themselves appear as ordinary humans. Succubi in particular are able to tailor their illusions to match their victims' inner desires. So if a guy's ideal woman is a blonde bombshell, that's exactly what the succubus will appear to him as.
• Must Have Caffeine: Oriscoe is a coffee junkie, often drinking dozens of cups per day. He explains that it's all for his werewolf side.
• Older Than They Look: Nogan gets annoyed at sometimes being treated as an inexperienced young girl due to her appearance. She points out that, as a half-succubus, it's natural for her to appear young, since most men prefer younger women. This doesn't mean that she's actually that young. In fact, the first episode mentions that she's already been a cop for 8 years before making detective.
• One-Gender Race: All succubi are female, and all incubi are male. Their children (with other kinds of supernatural beings) are always the same sex.
• One-Steve Limit:
  • Averted in the fourth episode. Two side characters are named Arthur: a fishman named Arthur Curry and a bailiff named Arthur Pendragon.
  • Also averted with two (unrelated) characters with the last name Smith: the SIS sketch artist/psychic Johnny Smith and the Chief of Special Operations Hugo Smith.
• Oni: An underground fight promoter used to be Shuten-doji, whose MO used to be kidnapping young women and draining them back in Japan. He claims to have turned over a new leaf. Van Helsing knows how to make him talk (it involves beans).
• Only Bad Guys Call Their Lawyers: Naturally, Oriscoe tries to make use of this trope whenever a suspect demands a magister. But they usually keep insisting (as is their legal right).
• Our Dragons Are Different: Dragons are ancient creatures using a unique form of primordial magic. They are known for their large treasure hoards and are ruthless to anyone who steals from them. They often take human form in order to interact with other species. Not many supernaturals are able to fight a dragon and come out alive, much less beat them.
• Our Ghosts Are Different: Ghosts retain their memories of when they were alive. They can be summoned using a ritual, but some are holding jobs in the supernatural world, although it requires some concentration for them to be able to manipulate physical objects instead of just passing through them. It's standard procedure for the CSI (Conjuration, Scrying, and Invocation) team to summon the ghost of the deceased to ask them questions, although they aren't usually required to testify in court. Lieutenant Epatha Van Helsing is one such ghost. Another prominent ghost is Judge Aleister Crowley. There's also Magistrate Harry Houdini.
• Our Vampires Are Different: Vampires have many of their usual strength. They're fast and strong, drink blood, and don't age. They can also learn to turn into a wolf or mist (the latter is, apparently, much harder to learn). They don't appear to dislike the sun, as some are shown to be walking around in broad daylight, but they are allergic to silver (which doesn't stop one vampire from keeping silver knives as weapons). Unusually, older vampires (those older than 500 years or so) begin to lose touch with reality and develop something similar to human senility before going completely feral.
• Our Werewolves Are Different: Werewolves can shift at any time (not just during a full moon). They are often driven by the desire to hunt, especially recently turned ones. They are almost like a split personality from the human. While in wolf form, the human can't directly affect their wolf side, only making suggestions. Interestingly, Oriscoe's wolf, being Jewish, has his head fur knit itself into a yarmulke shape. The same is true for Oriscoe's maker, Rabbi Menachem Katzen. Werewolves typically hunt humans, and supernatural law allows them to kill for sustenance, provided they're licensed in the given locus. Oriscoe has sworn off hunting and eating "long pork" after it nearly ruined his job and did ruin his marriage, but he's willing to re-apply for a license in order to help out Nogan.
• Our Zombies Are Different: Zombies are fully intelligent and remember their mortal lives. They don't feel pain and are very difficult (although not impossible) to kill permanently, especially since burnings were banned. There's even a zombie mafia.
• The Paladin: Epatha Van Helsing's clan is made up of paladins, known for their ruthlessness in rooting out evil supernatural creatures.
• Really Royalty Reveal: Near the end of the first episode, it becomes clear that Nogan isn't exactly who she claims she is. She finally reveals to Oriscoe that her real name is Drusilla bat Agrat and that she's the daughter of Agrat bat Mahlat, one of the Four Queens of Hell. And her father Hercule is a French vampire prince (and Agrat's consort). She deliberately used a fake name in order to make it on her own. Unfortunately, her parents insist on using their influence to help out their daughter. In the fourth episode, Nogan takes Oriscoe to visit her Uncle Luci, and it's also mentioned that the other Queens of Hell are Nogan's aunts.
• Red Herring: In the second episode, Oriscoe and Nogan are handing two witnesses to Covenancy marshals for protective custody. Oriscoe wonders why the two marshals haven't given them their names, and, after the van drives off, Nogan begins to suspect that something is wrong. We're meant to think that the episode's Big Bad has sent in her goons to kidnap the witnesses or that the marshals have been bribed. Nope. While the Big Bad does have a plan, it has nothing to do with the marshals or the witnesses. Indeed, one of the marshals shows up at the end of the episode.
• Screw the Rules, I Have Connections!: In the second episode, Nogan calls her royal mother to put an end to the transfer of the Monster of the Week to Covenancy custody. It's the one time no one minds that.
• Shout-Out:
  • One of the uniformed cops Oriscoe runs into early on is named Jim Butcher.
  • Nogan mentions a Lieutenant D'Onofrio, clearly referring to Vincent D'Onofrio, who played Detective Robert Goren on Law & Order: Criminal Intent. Another reference to the same appears in the seventh episode with Detective Vinbert "Vinny" Gonofrio and his partner Kathandra Earbes (a reference to Goren's partner Alexandra Eames) of the Maleficium Cryptogenia Unit.
  • In the third episode, an almost victim is named Sarah Jane, and Oriscoe sends Johnny Smith to sift through her memories for the identity of the attacker.
  • A fishman in the Aquatic Division of the SIS is named Arthur Curry.
  • The fourth episode introduces Marivia Benitay of the Spectral Victims Unit, which is a nod to Mariska Hargitay, who plays Olivia Benson on Law & Order: Special Victims Unit.
  • Benitay's partner is a weretiger named Ellis Stabloni, which refers to Elliot Stabler from SVU and Law & Order: Organized Crime.
  • One of Benitay's coworkers is named Ice Cofy, a clear reference to Ice-T, who plays Fin Tutuola on the same show.
  • One of the judges is a fairy named Morgana le Fay, and her bailiff is Arthur Pendragon.
  • The Chief of Special Operations is named Hugo Smith, who dresses in a black suit, a white shirt, a black tie, and sunglasses. At one point he goes on a rant about how things are run in the twenty-seventh precinct and how much he hates detectives, considering them (and supernaturals in general) a virus.
• Soul Eating: A few supernatural beings feed on human souls, usually at the moment it leaves the dying body. This also conveniently prevents the CSI from learning the identity of the attacker from the victim's spirit. The killer of the fourth episode is a silkie, a sea creature that lures sailors out into the water so she can drown them and eat their souls. However, this one uses a dating app to trick men into committing suicide by jumping off bridges.
• Succubi and Incubi: Succubi and incubi are demons who feed on the life force of men and women (respectively) during sex. While they don't have to drain their victims completely, it still happens pretty often, resulting in Out with a Bang. It's not uncommon for succubi to work in the sex industry. Some supernatural creatures are immune to succubus draining, and werewolves are one such kind. Dru is a half-succubus (on her mother's side, obviously) and has given an oath to swear off sex in order to join the SIS.
• Sudden Name Change: In the first episode, Leery's first name is spelled "Leerome", but in the third episode it's "Lerome" with no explanation for the change. The discrepancy wasn't corrected for the audiobook either.
• Summoning Ritual: It's standard procedure for the CSI team to summon the ghosts of the victims in order for the detectives to question them.
• SWAT Team: The Servitor Warriors and Therianthropes entry team is composed of two servitor warriors (for two wizards sitting in the command vehicle) and four therianthropes: a Skin Walker, a werewolf, a Garudan, and a Ganeshan. A raid typically involves the Ganeshan ripping the door off with his elephantine tusks, while the servitors go through the wall.
• The Trickster: Loki himself is mentioned in Slay Fell Things in a conversation between Sam and Angie. They fear that Loki might get involved in the trial just because he's bored. Sam hopes he finds something interesting to watch on Netflix and suggests Marvel's Loki series, only for Angie point out it's not out yet. They settle on gifting Loki a Netflix subscription anyway.
• Try to Fit That on a Business Card: The rulers of Hell/Gehenna tend to have very long official titles. For example, Nogan introduces her mother as "Her August Majesty, Agrat bat Mahlat, Sovereign of Demons, Commander of the Eighteen Legions, Queen of the Shabbat, Angel of Divine and Sacred Prostitution, Wife to Hercule, Dancing Roof-Demon, Mistress of Sorcery, One of the Four Queens of Gehenna, She of the Great and Terrible Name, and my mother." She later introduces her aunts as "Lilith, who was once named Lilitu, Daughter of the Sky, Sister to Night and Wind Storm, Desolator of Edom, the Hand of Inanna, Irritant of Asherah, the Spirit in the Tree, the Bane of Betrayers, She of the Great and Terrible Name, Goddess of Seduction and Desolation and Disease and Night. Also known as Our Lady Chaos in some circles" and "Naamah, Mother of Divination, Giver of the Plagues, Corrupter of Angels, Wife to Solomon, Seducer of Nephilim, Breaker of Samael, the Great Seducer of Mankind, She of the Great and Terrible Name, Goddess of the Otherworlds and the Disincarnate." And, of course, Lucifer himself is titled "Lucifer ben Mahlat, King of Gehenna, Lord of the Flies, Prince of Darkness, Father of Lies, the Great Shaytan, Day-Star, Son of The Morning, Tempter, Angel of Light, Lord of the Air, the Great Adversary, the Roaring Lion, Angel of the Abyss, the Dragon Lord, He of the Great and Terrible Name."
• Unconventional Courtroom Tactics: In the first novel, the defense magister appeals to the jury in his closing argument to disregard evidence. Locus Magister McCoy is outraged at this attempt at jury nullification and objects to the entire argument. It doesn't work, as the jury still comes back with a guilty verdict.
• Undercover Cop Reveal: In the fifth episode, Oriscoe and Nogan go to visit the wife of a member of the Dead Set, a vampire "social club" (more like a bike gang), whose mundane lover Jason Gatsby was found exsanguinated in Battery Park. In the lobby, they run into two vampire goons who give Oriscoe grief over being a werewolf, with both Oriscoe and the male of the vampire pair itching for a fight. The wife agrees to talk to them, but only at a nearby coffee shop, but for that she needs them to get rid of her vampire minders. Oriscoe deliberately picks a fight with the male goon, only for the vampire to whisper to him to "make it look good" and throw the fight. Both goons are arrested but quickly reveal themselves to be undercover Covenancy Bureau of Investigation agents working the Dead Set case.
• Unresolved Sexual Tension: It develops between Oriscoe and Nogan in the third episode, with no hint of it in the first two. It helps that werewolves are among the few supernatural creatures that are immune to succubus draining, so there's no risk of them engaging in intercourse.
• Yiddish as a Second Language: Oriscoe sometimes peppers his speech with Yiddish words.

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