"Koizumi... I mean Itsuki, is not a person that you can control! I'll protect him with all I've got!"
— Mikuru
The Adventures of Mikuru Asahina, Episode 00 is an independent film starring Mikuru Asahina, Yuki Nagato, and Itsuki Koizumi, directed by Haruhi Suzumiya, and narrated by chore boy Kyon.
Mikuru Asahina is a battle waitress from the future. Her job is to protect Itsuki Koizumi, an esper with dormant powers. Yuki Nagato, an evil witch who's also an alien, wants to control Itsuki and use his powers.
This film premiered at the North High School Festival in Nishinomiya City.
This show provides examples of:
- As Himself: Mikuru Asahina, Yuki Nagato, and Itsuki Koizumi play themselves.
- Best Known for the Fanservice: One suspects most viewers only watched this for the shots of Mikuru’s, um, assets.
- Cherry Blossoms: The final scene between Itsuki and Mikuru has a part where he takes one out of her hair.
- Corpsing: In-Universe. Ms. Tsuruya bursts into laughter in the middle of saying that she trusts Mikuru.
- Dude, She's Like in a Coma: Itsuki attempts to kiss Mikuru while she's passed out after falling into a lake. He is interrupted by Yuki.
- Dull Surprise: When Itsuki first sees Yuki, he pauses, gasps, and plainly asks who she is.
- Enforced Method Acting: The actress playing Mikuru is drunk in the scene where she wakes up at Itsuki’s house. This was due to collusion between the director and the actress who plays one of Yuki’s minions, out of the belief that it would make Mikuru cuter and more vulnerable. So they spiked her drink without her knowledge or consent. When the cameraman found out about this, he was so enraged that he very nearly punched the director in the face, and was only barely stopped by the actor playing Itsuki.
- Mi... mi... MIKURU BEAM!
- Go-Karting with Bowser: Yuki is seen working with Mikuru in selling electronics at the mall. No explanation for this is given at all.
- Gratuitous English: From the theme tune: Come on, let's dance! Come on, let's dance, baby~!
- Human Aliens: Yuki, who looks just like a human in a stereotypical witch costume.
- Informed Ability: Mikuru is a time traveler. We never see her in other time periods.
- Lemony Narrator: The narrator is so snarky you gotta wonder whether or not the DVD gives the MSTed version by mistake.
- Misplaced Wildlife: Played With. The doves that torment Mikuru in the opening are native Japanese doves filmed on location, but rumors that some practical joker painted them white and made them look like passenger pigeons (which are extinct, and were restricted to the Americas when they were alive) are unsubstantiated.
- Ms. Fanservice: Mikuru. She is totally inept at her job, but nearly every seen shows off her endowments.
- Narm: Yuki's henchmen throwing Mikuru into the lake was set up to be dramatic, but as they do so, one of the henchmen falls into the lake with her.
- Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot: Mikuru the time traveling battle waitress and Yuki the alien witch.
- No Budget: Literally. They only bought a camera, and even then the director convinced the shopkeeper to give it to them for free in exchange for shooting a commercial for them.
- Only the Author Can Save Them Now: Mikuru is utterly inept against Yuki, who has her on the ropes from beginning to end, and would surely triumph were it not for Itsuki awakening his esper powers at that exact moment for no clear reason and no foreshadowing, sending Yuki flying miles away.
- Ordinary High-School Student: Itsuki. He is an esper, but doesn’t know it until he awakens his powers to banish Yuki at the end.
- Playboy Bunny: Mikuru dresses as one while working at the mall. The narrator wonders why a waitress would wear one, and says it screams "trying too hard".
- Product Placement: Mikuru is seen working at stores in a mall. They are Morimura Produce, Kumai Meat Shop, Suzuki Stationery, Ohmori Electronics and Yamatsuchi Model Shop.
- Psychic Powers: Itsuki is an esper, yet he doesn't realize it.
- Serendipity Writes the Plot: Lots of this, thanks to the director not having a script and making stuff up as she went along, which was actually quite useful considering all that went wrong. Originally, Mikuru was only going to wear the waitress outfit, and had one brown eye and one blue eye for no reason other than to mark her as special. They lost the blue contact after filming one scene with it, so the director decided her eye was only blue when using the power. Yuki was only made a witch when her actress showed up to filming dressed in the outfit (which was for her class’s cultural festival exhibit). The rest snowballed from there.
- Sexy Discretion Shot: As soon as Mikuru starts taking off her Playboy Bunny outfit, the screen turns blue and cuts to Mikuru post-changing. The narrator claims that they don't have the footage and it's useless to ask for it. Later, when Mikuru changes from her waitress outfit and changes, it cuts to her walking down the stairs outside her room.
- Special Effect Failure: Everything else freezes as the Starring Inferno's rays are animated.
- Stripperiffic: Mikuru, oh so very much. Her clothes have included a Playboy Bunny suit and a short-skirted waitress dress.
- Talking Animal: Subverted with Yuki's cat. After delivering advice to Yuki, she hits him with the Starring Inferno, and says that that was ventriloquism.
- This Is a Work of Fiction: Over the ending credits.
This story is a work of fiction. All character names, organizations, incidents and any other names, phenomena and such, are fictional as well. It's all made up. Even if it resembles someone, it's probably just a coincidence. Oh, except for the commercials! Shop at Ohmori Electronics and Yamatsuchi Model Shop for great deals. Stop by and buy! Huh, I gotta say it again? This story is a work of fiction. All character names, organizations, incidents and any other names... Hey Kyon! Why do I have to say all this stuff anyway? I mean, it's totally obvious.
- This Is the Part Where...: Unintentionally, the director gives out a stage instruction in the middle of a scene.
Director: This is when you're supposed to faint!
- Troubled Production: Making this film was pure hell for everyone involved except the director. Mikuru’s actress was actually tackled down and attacked by Yuki’s actress on several occasions as well as suffered through the incident recorded under Enforced Method Acting. Both the cameraman and Itsuki’s actor almost got killed during the Mikuru Beam scene, the extras playing Yuki’s minions got dunked in water and sent home on their own without a change of clothes, the whole crew was sent all over town aimlessly, and postproduction had to pull an all-nighter.
- A Twinkle in the Sky: Yuki is sent flying into the sky, spinning, after Itsuki blasts her.
Curses.
- Two Girls and a Guy: Mikuru and Yuki are the two girls, and Itsuki is the guy.
- Victoria's Secret Compartment: Mikuru places her paycheck in her Playboy Bunny outfit.
- Visual Effects of Awesome:
- Mikuru’s eye beams. The ones in the final battle... not so much.
- Yuki's cat talking. The puppetry matched the ventriloquism perfectly.
- Itsuki blasting Yuki into the sky.
- A Wizard Did It
Narrator: Uh, some kind of electromagnetic waves coming out of the so-called Starring Inferno wand has turned Tsuruya and the guys into a trio of mindless puppets.
- Wraparound Background: A rare live action example. There are shots of Mikuru running through the same part of the mall, getting more exhausted by each clip.
- Writing by the Seat of Your Pants: The director didn’t write a script, and as such made stuff up as she went along.
