Headscratchers / 7th Heaven

• How, time-wise, is Mary able to graduate college at the end of Season 10?
  She forsakes going to college during both Season 05 (which starts at the September after her High School graduation, with her 18 years old) and Season 06. Beginning Season 07, she abruptly moves away to be a flight attendant in Florida; since she had already had been a flight attendant, to her liking, for some time, and these episodes are set in September/October in which it is too late anyway to enroll in the current college year, we can assume that she didn't go to college during Season 07 either. Which leaves Seasons 08, 09 and 10—three years—to graduate in New York at apparently 24 years old. This is too short of a time; graduating college takes four full-time years, and she seems to have still worked as a flight attendant (with the extremely hectic work schedule that entails) once she starts living in New York, that alone would not leave her time to go to college—not to mention she also had a baby in the meantime.
• Why do all the people in Glenoak seem to know Eric Camden? Sure, many people may know him from church or his services around the town, though everyone? Sure, it's a small town, but it couldn't be that small. On top of that, why do the police department consult Eric, of all people, to help rehabilitate people in need? In Real Life police works together with, and would consult social workers if needed.
• How can a town the size of Glenoak ^note As mentioned in other Headscratchers here, Glenoak seems to be so small that everyone knows everyone. have not only its own: hospital, college, multiple high schools (there's at least one public one and one private one, seeing as Ruthie is the only one sent to the latter), and most inexplicably of all, its own airport - one which has direct flights to Buffalo, NY, which is itself not the biggest city, and is apparently busy enough for airline attendants to be stationed in?
  • Artistic License – Geography.
• On the flipside of the above-mentioned things Glenoak should be too small for, it lacks some things you would expect. For instance, a teenage girl who cuts herself is sent, on Eric's recommendation, to get psychiatric treatment for that... all the way on the other side of the country. You'd certainly think Glenoak has psychiatrists, including ones specialized for teenagers or to treat this specific problem.
• It appears that almost everyone that the Camdens meet have some sort of problem. Why is that? I mean, people do have their problems, but wow. They must have some sort of trouble magnet.
  • Because Eric Camden's job was portrayed as basically a social-worker-but-then-again-a-religious-as-opposed-to-secular-version-of-that. Heck, for a show considered to be "notoriously Christian", if you think about it, actually only a tiny amount of his job portrayal involves him delivering sermons etc., and 95% of it seems to be to function as what comes down to a social worker. The Glenoak Police Department consulted him frequently in a way a Real Life police department would consult an actual social worker.
  • Plus, simply, Rule of Drama.
• There is a disturbing number of pregnant teenagers on this show, more than most shows would have. In the United States, the teen pregnancy rate peaked in the '50s and has been declining ever since with the introduction of condoms and birth control, and the legalization of abortion. How come there appeared to be a shortage of condoms or morning-after pills, or anything like that? What about a sex education class in school? Actually, the word "birth control" is never used, as is "abortion" (not surprising, considering the show's super-clean Christian image).
  • One notable example in season 3 would be a pregnant 16-year-old girl expected to get married to the baby's father - a 25-year-old ex-convict. Even more so, the girl doesn't want to get married, and only expects him to be there for their child.
  • On that 25-year-old convict, how come he isn't in jail? Having sex with a minor would definitely be at worst, a felony, at best a misdemeanor in California (according to California Penal Code 261.5).
    • He could be on an informal probationary period, if he was tried and convicted of a misdemeanor, even though he was convicted of something else before. Under the same penal code, he could be filed under either charge of felony or misdemeanor, though he likely wouldn't be around when the teen girl gave birth to his child.
  • Becomes Fridge Brilliance (likely unintentional on the part of the show runners) when you know that some areas have sex education programs that basically boil down to "just be abstinent because all birth control fails most of the time, take our word for it." These areas tend to have much higher rates of teen pregnancy than areas with more balanced and comprehensive sex education. Many teens are likely to have sex no matter how often they're told not to, but if they're simultaneously led to believe that all birth control methods just flat-out don't work...
  • If a town is small enough it can be impossible for a teenager to acquire birth control without someone who knows their parents seeing them. Some teenagers don't want their parents to know they have sex because they fear getting punished, so they just have sex without birth control and it only becomes a problem if a girl gets pregnant. Teaching kids about condoms in sex ed doesn't magically make birth control accessible.
• All birth control, in the 7th Heaven universe, seems to fail, as numerous characters (including Annie) seems to get pregnant in spite of using it. What the hell is that about? Come on, that's extremely unlikely, unless if the factory manufacturing these products make them cheap and send all of them to Glenoak. The chances of a condom breaking are at max 2% and birth control, in developed nations like America, mostly works, with a less than 5% chance of pregnancy if applied correctly (in fact, 85% of all pregnancies result from ''no'' birth control, intentionally or unintentionally).
  • Once again, it's a religious show!
• Everyone that the Camden clan come across (with a problem, of course) seems to be "cured" at the end of the episode. In Real Life, that's not realistic because many of the problems they have (e.g. alcoholism, drug addiction, infidelity) are not issues that you can fix in an hour, often taking years before they are completely recovered. It's not like Eric Camden is God himself...or is he?
  • Can't agree the above assumption holds up. E.g., "Aunt Julie" is established to be an alcoholic in season 1, and four years later in season 5, when Mary's drinking a beer in Julie's house, Julie’s Berserk Button about this is apparently hit because she makes it a point that she identifies herself a recovering alcoholic, and is strongly opposed to the presence of any alcohol in her house. Also, what about Mary's "fall from grace", which was pretty much dragged out over about a season-and-a-half?
  • No, that's not exactly right. On this show, it appears as if the Camdens are trying to make the "bad" people they meet "good" again, which is unrealistic. That's what bothers me the most - you can't change someone in the course of one episode, this takes years before it finally comes hold.
• Why doesn't it bother anyone when the Camdens seem to get in everyone's business? Most people would be freaked by the shear amount of times that they got involved in other people's problems without being asked, and if they lived in my town, they would be the people you'd run away from.
  • This rings true for the Camdens getting involved in their own family members' problems. They have never heard of the word "privacy".
  • It could be that the Camdens feel that it's their moral obligation to help as many people as they can before they go to the big guy in the sky.
  • The above explains why they're such busybodies, but not why no one else is bothered by it.
• How are the Camdens completely okay with Martin coming into their home, and helping himself to their food and drink? Most normal people would be easily (and justifiably) freaked out, and call the police on him!
• Why do police of Glenoak seem (initially) dismissive of Simon when he actually has reason to believe that a kid he knew would be capable of a shooting at their school? Sergeant Michaels basically knocked down Simon's opinion by making generalizations of what a school shooter should be, e.g. tortured animals, trouble in school, having been suspended or expelled once. That's not exactly true; every person have different mindsets, keep vital information from others (which is sadly Truth in Television), and these incidents could happen suddenly, often with family members finding out about their issues after the fact. Making generalizations like that do nothing but contribute to the Loners Are Freaks stereotype perpetuated by mass media, and also serve to have more people injured or killed than saved.
• In numerous episodes, it appears that whenever a member of the Camden family (more likely than not, Eric) suggests that a troubled person get help or do something they ask them to do, they do it. It seems as if the Camdens have a way with words in which no one will refuse to make an offer. I mean, the show depicts them as a good family, but no one is that susceptible to other people's suggestions. Prime example: when Eric asks Mary's ex-boss of the whereabouts of Mary's friends, Johnny and Frankie (the former being the owner's nephew), the man is instantly worried and closes down the pizza shop for the day, instead of let's say, asking someone else to watch the shop while he was gone. Also goes under Fridge Logic.
• In one episode, Mary's friend Frankie stated that her mother wouldn't babysit her baby daughter because of her Teen Pregnancy with said child. However, in the following episode, she says to Mary that her mother won't babysit anymore after her arrest for marijuana possession. Was Frankie lying, or simply doublespeaking?
  • Frankie explicitly told that her mother would babysit when Frankie worked at the pizzeria, but only for that and not for other occasions; specifically not for social or recreational occasions. When Frankie later says her mother doesn't babysit anymore, she means her mother now has stopped babysitting completely (during Frankie's work too now) ^note IIRC, when Frankie "dumps" her baby with Mary at Julie's house, Frankie is saying she needs to because she has to work.
• There's one episode where the entire town gossips about Mary's departure, and the Camdens in general. Why? The Camdens aren't the most interesting people in the world, and most people in Real Life would just ignore their problems because they have their own, and growing up in a small town, most people would just mention it and then go on with their own lives.
  • There's another episode where Eric is counseling a woman who is trying to get out of a physically violent marriage, and what seems like the entire town - including Matt - assumes he's having an affair with her. Given that Eric is a minister who frequently counsels people for all manner of things, it seems weird that people would jump to this conclusion.
• The Colonel seems to have been a colonel since the Korean War, though that has somewhat confused me. In order to reach the rank of colonel, the person has had to have about 16-18 years in the military under their belt (at least until the Vietnam War, where it was switched to an average 21-23 years of service), which also brings up the question of the Colonel's actual age (the actor Peter Graves was born in 1927, which could retroactively be applied to the Colonel's age on the show). However, The "Colonel" rank could've been temporary, and he was later upgraded to a full colonel after the allotted timeframe.
  • A more important question about The Colonel's military background: where was he exactly stationed? It's been stated that Eric was raised in Binghamton, New York, which is four hours inland from the nearest Marine installation, a recruiting command center. From there, the closest military base would be in Virginia; however, potential Marines living east of the Mississippi are trained at Parris Island in South Carolina. Also, it seems to be a bit odd that Eric lived in one location his entire childhood, since most military men and women would actually move around a lot with their families in Real Life.
  • However, that could be chalked up to Eric's mother deciding to stay in Binghamton while her husband was stationed somewhere else, and while that doesn't occur that much, it still could happen.
• The highly Anvilicious episode "Smoking" features straw smoker Betty, who is shown to be a rude and inconsiderate Jerkass who is only defined by her smoking trait. She goes on a date with Ben, and when the answer machine to her house doesn't pick up, she immediately assumes a possible burglar. Ben, Betty, and Kevin (who went along with the two) arrive at the house, and discover that it has been burned to the ground, with the firefighters informing the trio that a cigarette set the blaze. This brings up multiple questions: How did the entire house burn down in the span of about an hour? How did the firefighters figure out the cause of the fire when the whole house is reduced to ashes? More importantly, how did they find out so fast? How did the firefighter know of Ben, Betty, and Kevin's connection to the house, since they clearly just arrived? Why is the front door standing without support?
• In the episode "Nothing Endures but Change", Lucy's friend Sarah's older sister Jenn plans to drive all three of them to the pizza place at night with Jenn's new car, but since Eric and Annie disapprove of Lucy being driven in a car by someone who only recently got their license (on top of the parents barely knowing her), they let Matt drive her there and pick her up instead. However, a phone call reveals that Sarah and Jenn changed their plans and are going to a hamburger place instead, so Lucy's plan is for Matt to drop her off at the pizza place and have her wait for Sarah and Jenn to arrive, then for Lucy to get in the two sisters' car and have them drive her to the burger place.
  Why couldn't Lucy just tell Matt that Sarah and Jenn changed their destination and ask him to drive her to the burger place instead of dropping her off at the pizza place for Sarah/Jenn to pick her up/drive her there? What was the point of dropping her off at the pizza place only to be picked up by different drivers to go to a different place?

---